Lunatic Ravings!
By Stephen Johnson
I'm back! Sorry that I neglected all of you for the last week but we had to go back to Vegas in order to look for
a house. Now I'm back and we can get on with business as usual.
A lot of people told me it would take a couple of days, at least, to find a house. Well, those people are obviously
stupid because we found one in 4 hours. We had a great realtor, Sandra, who showed us around and I thank her for
that.
We did visit one house and while the women were walking around I happened to look up at a light in the ceiling
and noticed something that looked like dried blood on part of the light. I looked around and found some little
splatters that looked like dried blood on the ceiling near this same light. We kind of decided that it wouldn't
be wise to live in this death house, so we went on our merry way. Besides, the people next door had a carpet cleaner
outside next to their pool so I can only assume that they were totally fucked in the head and would not make the
best of neighbors.
We finally decided on a house that is in the process of being built. Due to some insurance thingy, we were advised
that we shouldn't go to the house and walk around the inside while the construction workers were there. If we did,
they would have to pack up all their belongings and leave.
Well, I had to check to see if this was true. I went to the house on Saturday and there were some guys working
on the house. I walked into the house and tried to start a conversation with a guy who was sanding a door frame.
Sure enough, he packed up his things and started to leave, as did the other workers. I would have none of that
so I followed them outside asking questions, but they wouldn't answer. They hopped into their trucks and left.
I felt that it was a good time for some gambling and some beer so I went to a nearby casino. I hung around for
an hour and decided to go back to the house.
They were back at work again, so I ran into the house and watched as they packed up again anf left. This continued
a couple more times and I noticed that seemed to be getting a little pissed at me. The last time I ran into the
house I swear one of them whacked me on the head with a hammer because the next thing I remember is waking up and
it was dark out. Well, at least I had some fun with it.
We saw the Vegas New Years fireworks from a hill looking down on the city. It was kind of cool because it looked
like the city was being attacked by Godzilla because of all the explosions, which I found very humorous. I was
drunk so I guess that had something to do with it.
That's all I'm going to write for now.
COMING NEXT: I am forced
to break every one of my New Years resolutions.
Look for a new "Lunatic Ravings" each Monday and Thursday.
