Title: Malfoy's Pride
Author: kbk
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and all related characters are owned by Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy and various other people and companies. None of whom are me. I make no money from this.
Rating: G
Summary: Draco wonders how much of a Malfoy he really is. The discussion on seductive evil is written as Watching Malfoy

I have a measure of fame of my own. A case in point: right now, the two men in the corner booth are talking about me. They're far enough away that their conversation, muttered into their goblets, ought to be private. But I found a useful little listening charm not so long ago. You would be amazed at the things I have heard. For instance: at a dinner towards the end of the year, Harry Potter and his hangers-on were discussing my "seductive evil". That was entertaining...

However. The men in the corner. The fat one pointed me out to his companion as "Malfoy's pride and joy." The thin one replied with a witticism to the effect that "Malfoy" and "joy" were rarely heard in tandem. "Malfoy's pride, then," the fat one responded. This is true enough. I am the Malfoy heir. My father is proud of me. I, too, am proud. I have, for want of a better expression, the Malfoy pride. Unfortunately, it will not prevent me from arriving at the rendezvous twenty minutes before the appointed time, just in case Father is early for once and decides to punish me for making him wait. It will not prevent me from waiting for two hours past the allotted time just in case Father hasn't forgotten and is merely running late. I may have the Malfoy pride: but my father has more.

Somehow, the school has contaminated me. I am certain it will dissipate, given time and work. I shall be most careful of that place when I return to it - Hogwarts will house no more of my nightmares.

Nightmares are a sign of weakness. Nightmares do not happen to Malfoys. Malfoys are strong. Why, then, do we follow whichever dark lord rises? Why, if we are pure and strong, do we not claim the power for ourselves? Why, when Voldemort fell, did my father claim to have been under the Imperius curse? It was, of course, the most intelligent and safe course of action. However, a more audacious and possibly rewarding plan would have been to gather the Death Eaters and seize control while everybody else was setting off fireworks. So then, perhaps my father is not quite the man he claims to be; the man I thought he was. The man I fear. Malfoys fear nothing, of course. It is the way of things.

Malfoys do not fear; yet I do. Malfoys are strong; yet I am not. Malfoys are evil...

I am. My actions speak for themselves. These are not the works of a boy who is good. I am cruel and merciless. I am evil.

But then; is the man who treats a wounded bird and keeps it caged because it can no longer fend for itself, really any better than the man who wrings its neck? With the right guiding principle, could not a merciless nature be transfigured to a necessary ruthlessness, a single-mindedness and determination? More so, should it be? And where to find such a light? No. I am evil, and thus I am a Malfoy. But... if I were not. If I were not this one thing, I would no longer be a Malfoy. I would be free to choose my path. I could stand with Potter and the others when the final battle comes, instead of against them - if I so chose.

But I cannot choose.

For I am a Malfoy. The role that I am to play was determined long ago. And I will meet my destiny.