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**Author's Note: This isn't normal Branden writing, I needed release and wasn't feeling overly creative, but it turned out okay. Well, I was pleased with it anyway, decide the quality for yourself. . . and with no further delays. . . inPROSE. Not much to say anymore. i just grow tired of the people I'm forced to be around day after day. I'm glad I don't have to live here much longer. I think what I'm looking for so hard is something to call my own; something to tell me who I am. It's not easy anymore now that I see "me" in everyone around me. I'm tired of hurting. I'm tired of having to care. I'm tired of not caring enough. I'm tired of being me. I'm tired of telling myself it won't be much longer. I'm tired of not being loved the way I want. I'm tired of holding back. I'm tired of having what I don't deserve. I'm tired of not having what I want. I'm tired of having to differintiate between the two. I'm tired of not having anyone to relate to. I'm tired of people telling me they can relate. I'm tired of knowing they are lying. I'm tired of self-pity. I'm tired of self-loathing. I'm tired of running out of words before I am done. I'm tired of being done. I'm tired of not sleeping at night. I'm tired of being sleepy all the time. I'm tired of people telling me what to do. I'm tired of making decisions. I'm tired of running out of cigarettes at nine at night. I'm tired of having to go to the store to get more. I'm tired of pretending I'm okay. I'm tired of not thinking I am. I'm tired of not reading enough. I'm tired of being sucked into my computer. I'm tired of people telling me I'm inferior. I'm tired of believing it. I'm tired of coming home and wanting to cry. I'm tired of not having the tears to cry. I'm tired of writing so much. I'm tired of this book being the only thing I can completely open up to. I'm tired of waiting till the weekends to see my friends. I'm tired of hitting the snooze button five times before I get up. I'm tired of getting up. I'm tired of my eyes always hurting. I'm tired of the pizza boxes that clutter my room. I'm tired of always having to buy. I'm tired of having too much money. I'm tired of not knowing what it means to save. I'm tired of not knowing the concept of love. I'm tired of feeling strange and awkward around my friends. I'm tired of not having friends to feel strange and awkward around. I'm tired of leading a boring life. I'm tired of always being on the go. I'm tired of being used. I'm tired of not being utilized. I'm tired of using people. I'm tired of them not realizing I am. I'm tired of wearing clothes. I'm tired of being cold all the time. I'm tired of Jesus and all of his disciples telling me to "find God." I'm tired of God. I'm tired of listening to the same music all the time. I'm tired of watching the same movies all the time. I'm tired of being disappointed. In my music. In my art. In my words. In myself. In the people around me. In my world. In the world around me. I'm tired. Sleep.
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