Distribution: To my site. Everyone else, hell no! Unless you ask of course. :)
DEDICATION: I'm dedicating this story to Claudia over at The Cruel Obsessions Site. Her on-going story right now of Angelus and Buffy is just the right solution for when I've had a hard day, and nothing but a hot, bubble bath surrounded by candlelight and her stories seem to dazzle me as much as they do. She has inspired me to the edge of writing this and I couldn't have done it without her brilliant uses of words and her love of Angelus! Thank you, my dear! I suggest if you haven't read her tale of Cruel Obsessions, to do so. It's absolutely beautiful. Go here to read it…
Disclaimor: Does it look like I actually own these wonderful actors and story lines?? Absolutely not! Joss Whedon, Mutant Company, UPN, The WB, are all responsible for that. I lead a rather boring, pointless life that consists of two things and two things only. Writing FanFic and watching BTVS... And of course, Claudia I think owns a little of this story as well since I wouldn't have even imagined it if it weren't for her. :)
The exact date was still vague to Buffy. The exact point in time at which all her daily energy and natural reflexes, all her thoughts and emotions blended and submerged into one name, one rhythm, one mantra, one single, gasp of breath, always demanding, begging to be released. While the organ, once noted as a heart, pounded and melted into one steady beat, as it fought against the strain of her blind, breathless running in the cold, calm night where only millions of small stars shone the way. The thin, young form rushed through the graves, broken, but not yet defeated. Staggering, yet still standing. Exhausted, but still moving. In her well-trained, educated mind on how the game of Cat and Mouse would surely end she distinctly apprehended, almost in a supernatural sense, that she would not be heading home after this fight… Her iron will, or what was left of it, after countless years of misery and torment from the one face she could never fall out of love with, was perhaps the only thing that had kept her alive for this long. It began that night that was going to be the start of her new life…
* * *
"Buffy! For God's sake, it's just a date! People have them all the time!" Willow coaxed her frantic friend, as she lay on her friend's bed in her room with an open Sociology book.
"I know, I know! But you're forgetting Willow. I'm Buffy Summers. The dates I have always, and always will, end up in blood, tears, and death." Buffy was fingering through her closet like a madwoman, skimming each article of clothing for not more than a mere second.
"Well, just think happy thoughts. You can't have bad luck for the rest of your life. No one can." Willow replied with a reassured smile.
"I'm not too sure about that…" Buffy picked out a plain, black tank top and held it up to herself, as she gazed in the mirror, scrutinizing herself inch for inch. She put the top on the bed and pulled out her shiny, glittering, dark, rayon pants and a long, shiny black "raincoat" type-material jacket that went a little past her knees when she wore it. She tugged out a pair of stylish boots and turned to Willow in askance.
Willow shrugged. "It's ok, I guess… If you want to be sending a message that you're a detached, depressed 60's chick." She smirked a little.
Buffy frowned in mocked annoyance. "Thanks a lot." She drolled.
"Buffy!!" A voice called from downstairs. "Your date is here!"
"Ok, thanks Dawnie!" She yelled back. She turned to Willow. "Oh God, tell me again why I'm doing this." She struggled to put on--as Willow called it--her "detached, depressing 60's look" outfit quickly.
"Because a guy actually asked you out, and for once there's not a psycho demon running a rampage through Sunnydale to stop you from saying yes, so you said 'yes,' he said 'cool,' you said 'when,' he said 'Saturday night.' And the rest is dating history."
"Right." Her tone was empty and heedless. Buffy gave one last look in the mirror with a dazed look. "Ok, I can do this." She soothed herself. "I can do this. I used to do it all the time. And I was good at it too, damn it! What happened! I've turned into a nerd!"
She grabbed her purse and rushed out the door she stopped mid-strife and made a small gasp. She turned around and went to her weapons trunk and pulled out a stake, holy water, and a cross and stuck it in her bag. Willow gave her a doubtful look.
"Well you never know these days! It's better to be prepared than not to be, I've learned!" She went to turn, yet stopped again. "I just hope the guy doesn't bring me flowers or something, cause of, ya know… That one Valentine's Day…" Buffy gazed at Willow in sorrow. Willow sighed. Her heart went out for Buffy. Poor girl. Angel turning into Angelus was terror for all of them, but most especially on Buffy. She never did look at roses the same way after that night. That was the same night Xander was Mr. Heartthrob of the USA. Willow shook her head. The things people did just to get a lousy date.
As Buffy headed down the stairs she silently prayed this night would go by super fast. She really didn't want to be doing this. Not that she dare tell Willow that. She knew Will meant well. She was only trying to get her over past hurts, but…some hurts just never go away… Her date was waiting at the bottom of the stairs, talking with Dawn.
She looked bored to death. //Great.//
"Hi," Buffy said cheerfully when she reached the bottom.
"Hey," He smiled at her. His eyes skimmed over her outfit and he chuckled. "Hey, groovy outfit! You look like one of those 60 chicks or something! Far out!" He laughed
Buffy closed her eyes in silent defeat. //God, why couldn't there be a psycho demon running through town?? She even would have settled for a lousy, little ascension. But nooooo. She had to go on a stupid date. Damn it!!// She knew she would live to regret this.
Buffy tried to fake a laugh as best she could and smiled. "Well, what can I say? I like to experiment when I go on dates." She giggled nervously. "Come on, let's go." She tugged at his hand. "Oh wait, I almost forgot. These are for you." He handed Buffy a dozen red roses.
//Ahhhhhh!!!!// "Awww, how sweet. You shouldn't have." She chirped. "Dawnie, you know where to put these, Hon" She absently forced them into Dawn's hands as she gave a big, naïve smile to her date.
Oh God, please let the end of the world be tonight…
* * * * * *
”…So Coach one time had us run these laps and my girlfriend, well ex now, but she decided to be real cute and funny and show her hooters to every guy on the team. I was so pissed at her, cause like, ya know, that’s like my personal property, ya know? Other guys can’t see that…not for free anyway…”
Buffy aimlessly watched her date with dazed-over eyes while leaning on her elbow. This guy was about as exciting as The Bass Fisherman Show on the Nature channel. The Bronze band echoed off the walls, as teenagers gave into their raging hormones and flung their bodies this way and that, letting the beat of the music carry them away from all reality. Buffy longed to be in that far off world. It had to be better than here. Hell, *any*where was better than here with this idiot. Her eyes suddenly caught a piece of a candy wrapper on the floor. //Hmm, wonder where that came from…// She noted the dark foil and plastic wrapping covering the circular object completely. //It's so nice and shiny and blue…// The candy seem to become her only sane support system, while sitting in this suddenly inconsequential club, with this guy with the mentality of a three year old. As her eyes intently gazed at the candy she found her mind begin to reminisce about trivial things that made no difference to anyone anymore… //I like candy… I remember when I went patrolling with Angel he sometimes would bring candy since he knew I liked those Health bars… He’d laugh at me while I ate the thing and get chocolate all over my lips. But then he’d…he’d---he’d kiss my mouth and lick at the sweet chocolate on my lips and even though I knew he couldn’t savor the taste the same way I could he would still close his eyes and smile and pretend to know how good it was. I wonder what he’s doing right now…is he on a hideous date?? He’s probably kicking ass on some demon…//
"…So what do you like to do for fun?"
Buffy suddenly turned her attention to the person sitting across the table from her with a slightly raised eyebrow. His mouth had stopped moving and there was no more sound coming out anymore. His eyes were watching her in a curious state. He must have asked her a question or something. Buffy racked her brain and tried to dimly remember what the hell this guy was talking about.
Fun?? He wanted to know what she did for fun??? //Oh, he’s just doing that idle conversation thing you do on first dates… Ok, hmmm…fun…// Buffy eyes widened a little as she thought about it. //Hmmm…. Well, patrolling, polishing my knife collection, kicking demon ass, ascension stopping, saving the world, playing Ghosts In the Graveyard with Will and Xander...smooching with a certain vampire…// Buffy’s coy smile was only directed at her own internal thoughts.
"Ummm, well, I like to do…some---stuff. Like um…read, and stuff, ya know, like books." She grinned widely. //God, what a moron I am.//
”Oh yea! I read those too sometimes! Like what was the last book you read? I read a lot of Sports Illustrated. And like I read this one book called Lassie Come Home Damn! I actually cried. Well, I mean a little…” He huffed in his defense.
//Ok, now I’m getting a little peeved. This guy is becoming more of a threat than a vampire would without a handy stake in my hand.// Buffy indirectly averted her eyes to the side and wished with all her might that this guy would explode into dust.
"Ya know---ummmm…" Buffy suddenly looked to him in guilty conscious. //Shit, what the hell is this guy's name??!!//
"Brad!" He indignantly retorted.
"Right!" She smiled widely at him. "Look, it's getting a little late and I have classes tomorrow… Yep, oh my God, look at that!!" She picked up her elbow and flashed him her watch. "It's half past seven! Whoo! I don't know about you but I'm not really into the whole staying-out-till-the-wee-hours thing. I lead a rather simple life."
"But---why--I mean, we just--" He tried to protest.
"No, really, I need my 14 hours of beauty sleep or else I'm just a monster to be around." She insisted.
"All right," He groaned deeply while picking up his coat and standing. He suddenly looked to her. "You got the bill, right?" Buffy stared at him in disbelief for a moment before she realized he was serious. //Un. Believable.// "Yea." She mumbled, shaking her head.
"Great, I gotta piss like a fucking mule. I'll be right back." Buffy, deciding to rank this night right up there with her mother's death took the bill to the counter, and then proceeded to walk out of the Bronze, waiting for him outside, in front.
The air was cool and crisp as she took her first step outside the club. Unusual for Sunnydale weather. However, Buffy rather enjoyed it on this particular night. The wind bit at her nose just a little and whistled around her ears, playing with her long hair. She closed her eyes for a moment and drank in the pleasurable feeling of the coldness. It reminded her of so many things. Ice cream, the ocean, but mostly it reminded her of one thing that she ached and longed to have beside her. Angel. She opened her eyes. Yes, it was always Angel when it came right down to it. The coolness of his breath, the soft, tingly coldness in his skin pressed right up against her hot, burning skin. His pale, smooth face catching the light of the moon every time he would whisper her name. She wished for him, somehow to be here, in this moment with her…
"Hey stranger," A whispered, sensual tone suddenly tickled at her ears.
She gasped faintly. //Was she dreaming??// She didn't turn around for a minute, for she thought it was merely an illusion. She slowly turned and lifted her head up to stare at him. And yet, there he was. Tangible, genuine, touchable, standing right here in front of her very eyes. Smiling even! She tried to speak but no sound would come to her throat.
"Angel…is it really you," She finally managed in a struggling whisper.
"Ok, boy, I tell ya, what a line! God, I thought I would have to--" Her date came over to where they were standing but she couldn't see him. It seemed all things recognizable to her then were at a stand still. Her date may as well have been charging her with an axe and she wouldn't even have known or cared, for she was still locked onto Angel, as he was to her.
"Hey, hello." Her date was waving his hand in front of her view, trying vainly to get her attention.
Slowly Buffy turned to Brad and acknowledged him for the first time as if she never had net him in her life. "Oh, hi." She replied idly, and went right back to staring at Angel.
"Hey, do you guys like know each other or something?" Brad asked.
Angel finally broke their intense contact with her eyes and turned his head to settle upon the boy before looking back to Buffy. Angel made a small, discreet gesture with his eyes as if to ask, "Who the hell is this guy?" Buffy smirked and gave a roll of her eyes. Angel grinned. //Obviously no one of importance. Hmmm…then maybe it would be kind of funny to…// "Actually we just met. Yep, just ran into each other and I swear I feel like I know her."
"Really?" Brad asked, very intrigued. He was actually buying it.
Buffy bit her lip to refrain from giggling and smiled right along with Angel. "Oh yea, I have the exact same feeling." She coyly winked at him.
"Hey, I know! Maybe you guys knew each other in a past life!" Brad triumphantly declared.
"Maybe…" Angel echoed. "Say, do you wanna get married tomorrow at sunset? Ride off into the hills and never look back?" He lifted his eyebrows in a sexy, flirtatious ploy toward her.
Buffy couldn't help but let escape a tiny giggle. "Ummm…well you don't even know my name, kind sir…" She kept smiling at him.
"Yea, she's got one of these really weird names! It sounds like a phoo-phoo dog's name or something." Brad informed Angel.
At this point in time, Angel's head whipped over to Brad and his eyebrows knitted in keen annoyance. It seemed suddenly his entire manner change into something...unknown. But it was gone as quickly as it appeared and Angel turned back to Buffy with a kind, warm smile on his face, brightening her whole world. "I bet I could guess." He whispered slyly.
"You can try," Buffy sweetly indulged him.
"Let me see..." Angel scratched his chin, playing this out to the max. "Is it...Buffy?"
"WHOA! You're amazing!" Brad was staring open-mouthed at both of them.
"You are good." Buffy grinned. "You know..." She pretended to think as well. "I think I will marry you. After all, you only live once. ...Or at least, some of us do." She smirked as Angel grinned right along with her.
"Great! My country will be so pleased you've reconsidered my offer, your Highness." Angel then bowed before her gracefully and extended his arm.
She giggled some more, delighting in this new playful attitude Angel obtained in LA.
"Your Highness?! Wow, you mean she's actually---I mean you guys are---" Brad was stunned.
"Nothing of the sort, my dear boy!" Buffy commanded in a regal voice. "And you would be best to forget you ever saw us! That is, if you don't want my guards coming after you! Goodnight." And with that she took Angel by the hand and ran off with him giggling into the night while her date screamed at her to come back.
* * * * * *
They were both laughing so hard tears were running down their faces. They looked the spiffy couple as they walked down the dimly lit street towards Buffy's house. Angel in his long, black coat, as always, and his black pants with a dark, blood red silk shirt on. It blended perfectly with Buffy's "detached, depressed 60's chick" look.
"God, I'm sorry. I guess I pretty much ruined that one for you as well." Angel ceased his roaring laughter to little chuckles.
"Oh please! The date was so over as soon as he brought me the ros---" Buffy suddenly looked at his face and blushed a little. "Well, anyway, it's over and I'm glad it is. I would have had to beat him at the end of the night anyway."
"That bad, huh?" Angel smiled.
"God yes!" Buffy hung her head in shame and sorrow, but suddenly perked up, now that she was alone with Angel. "So what are you doing here anyway? Cordelia didn't call or anything..."
"Well, I wanted to surprise you." He stealthily smiled at her.
"You didn't come here to see just me." Buffy said knowingly, a slight frown on her face.
"Ok, no." He admitted in truth. "There was a demon in LA. Real nasty one. We think it might have bolted this way. I'll be in town for a couple days doing some research and hunting and such."
"Well it'll be nice to have you here... I mean, I know...Dawn has missed you...and stuff..." Buffy tried to smile.
Angel smiled as best he could. "Yea, well I missed her too..." Although he was looking directly at her when he said it.
"So..." Buffy drawled. "If you don't mind too much maybe I could help you find this thing?" She looked to him nervously, but hopeful.
To her immense pleasure Angel smiled full of warmth. "I was kind of hoping you would. It'll be nice to work in this town again. See the old gang, patrolling with you," Angel looked at her. "...Unless of course there's someone else that you patrol with now..."
"No! No, no, no! There's no one else!" Buffy denied adamantly. //Well, unless you count Spike...// But she wasn't really involved with him. He was just there a lot of the times after her mother died and for a while when she came back, and he was always great with Dawn, but as far as developing feelings for each other, she only, really had one, true love.
"Well, good." Angel smiled at her.
"I'm glad you're here, Angel." Buffy smiled back at him.
"Yea, me too. It's going to be fun." His face was submerged in the eerie shadows of the overhung trees, but she could have sworn he was faintly smirking.