One night I was in a chatroom just talking and this Chris person private messages me. Normally only freaks & sex pervs message me so I usually ignore the invitation to chat, but for some reason I answered this one. He told me that he liked my user profile, that he lived in NY and it all went from there. After chatting and playing 20 questions with each other for a while he said he had to go. Later that night I get an e-mail from him asking when I'd be in chat next. Well, things developed and we began chatting every night for hours online. Pretty soon it turned into calling each other every night and talking on the phone for hours.
A few days after Christmas Chris asked me what all I'd gotten. I told him that I didn't get anything that I asked for. During the same conversation he said he wa in a band and he wanted to send me a CD. I gave him my address & that was that.
At this point I still hadn't seen what he looked like, but I already knew that I was falling in love. I didn't care what he looked like. He'd seen a few of my pictures though.
A few days later I check my mail to find a package. Inside is two movies that I had asked for for Christmas and didn't get (Cats & Rocky Horror Picture Show), a teddy bear for Madison, his CD and a picture. When I saw the picture I was like, "What the hell does this guy want anything to do with a mutt like me for?". He was actually hot!
Love At First Sight
At this point I knew for sure I was in love with him and driving myself mental thinking things like, "This is ridiculous! How can you be in love with someone you've only known like a month or so, that you've never even met!?"
We decided that he would finally come up here for a weekend. God I was so nervous. I KNEW he wouldn't like me or something and wouldn't want anything to do with me.
Everyone & their brother knew he was coming up that weekend. Hell for all I knew he totally lied about everything and was a psycho. Around 2am that Friday night he knocked on my door, I went to the peep hole & looked through. I was shaking like a leaf, but I opened the door anyways. We just sort of stood there looking at each other, not sure what to do. He pulled a beanie baby anteater out of his pocket for me. (I collect beanies) Then he grabbed my hand, pulled me towards him, and we hugged for what seemed like forever. God he smelled good.
That weekend went so well that he ended up staying until the Tuesday (he was supposed to leave on the Sunday) due to car trouble (except the car was fixed on the Monday).
And The Rest Is History
Despite the distance (it takes him 10 hours to get here) he calls me every day and comes up here every other weekend. And I go down there as often as I can. We've been together for about a year and a half and I love him with every fibre of my being. He loves me and loves my kid. His family are the most amazing, happy, normal people I have ever met. (God I love them.) And I can't wait until I'm done school and will be able to move down there.
Chris is definitely the person I want to be with for the rest of my life. Just the thought of waking up beside him every morning is enough to keep me going through the day. His scent on my pillow that lingers for a few days after he's been there makes me happy. The emptiness I feel on Sundays after he goes home makes me insane. But at the same time knowing that on his way home he's probably thinking about all the things we did that weekend and all the things Madison did to make us laugh, makes me happy.
Happiness
I've lived a pretty tough life. I can honestly say that until I met Chris I had never once been happy. It was like my lifelong dream to just be happy for once in my entire life and Chris has given me that. I also didn't know what it felt like to be loved. I always thought love was something you got because of something you did. I just didn't get it. I thought that you got love by keeping people happy, making your bed & being good, I never knew that love was supposed to be this way. I never knew that it didn't come with strings attached. But now I know what love is, and I'm never going to let it go. :-)
