The following excerpt is from the self help psychology book Be Your Own Therapist. It is on line for all to read and think about. Be sure and book mark us before you go off site to read!

Many years ago our population generally believed in good, evil, heaven and the devil. Punishment was expected in the hereafter for all the sins committed on this earthly plane. Few were willing to risk roasting in hell forever when by acting nice one could avoid such a fate. Today, however, believing in just one chance at this incredibly "unjust" world often leads to "reaching for the gusto" even if that means doing others physical or monetary harm. "Why not be violent and greedy if there is nothing to fear? The criminal justice system will probably not catch me. Even if it does, at least I will have had the momentary pleasure of power or money."

So-called spiritual values that consider humans to be essentially evil or flawed still contribute heavily to our problems with violence.

How many of us believe there is punishment in the hereafter? Christian religions believe there is punishment for sins in this life. Similarly, the idea of karma, (paying back in future lives for wrongdoings this time around) influences the 25% of us who believe in reincarnation. It has become unfashionable to talk of paying for one's sins. Perhaps the 75% or more of us, who do believe that wrongdoings will be paid back, need to vocally object to the widespread media bias against such a belief. Just because it is unfashionable in the media does not mean that that it is undesirable. Continued promulgation of such a belief held only by a minority of the population seems to me to be a definite factor in the continuation of our society's violence.

It has become fashionable to violate laws because they are inconvenient. This is a slippery slope, for more and more often it is not just exceeding 55mph but on to inflating a few income tax deductions (convincing ourselves everyone else does it), to claiming that your group has mistreated mine (so I'll rob you or beat you), and to going after whatever I want in a violent way with no regard for others' rights (because I have been mistreated). We lose an ounce of integrity every time we disobey the 55mph law, every time we inflate a tax deduction, every time we lie, etc. Personal authenticity and integrity are goals that are important if we are ever to find some inner contentment. Current societal laws and values do not make that easy for anyone to achieve. Personal authenticity and integrity are not always convenient.

OUR VALUES & SPIRITUAL BELIEFS HELP CAUSE THE VIOLENCE © 1995-99 Thayer White MA MFCC

Therapist and author, Thayer White MA MFCC, has over 23 years experience as both therapist and client in the areas of therapy and self-growth. Thayer is licensed to do psychotherapy in California as a Marriage Family and Child Counselor. He received his master's degree in Transpersonal Counseling Psychology from John F. Kennedy University (in Orinda, California), and his bachelor's degree from Northwestern University (in Evanston, Illinois). Since licensure, the majority of his therapy clients have been other therapists and their family members who have come to him to resolve longstanding issues. He is a past president of his (then) local 200+ member therapist organization, the San Francisco Chapter of the California Association of Marriage and Family Therapists."

Mr. White states, "My therapeutic emphasis these past few years has been on maximizing client power and minimizing amount of therapy needed: i.e. self help. To accept ideas wholesale just because some professional like myself says it is his truth developed over thirty years of experience is not your best path. Your best path is to take these ideas under consideration, mull them over for a while, test some of them out, and come to your own conclusions. I recommend that you label disagreements with me as "we do not agree" instead of the very common, "he is wrong"."

Mr. White further adds, "For the past seven years I have traveled an unusual path, namely - Whatever is bothering, irritating, upsetting, maddening or disturbing me is there for my highest benefit and ALWAYS tells me I have not completely learned some life lessons I might prefer to avoid. Whatever I get in life is what I need. Once I have learned what there is for me to learn, then the situation either fails to repeat or I am just not bothered by that situation anymore. This path is challenging but definitely recommended- for more information about this I suggest you read the spirituality chapter from my book (free online read) and the manifesting pages."

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