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Harry Potter and the Realm of Terrible, No-good Fanon

Or, Why do we prefer to change a character to suite our wants?

 

Part III

 

by Mina

 

(Better known as ‘Look, we’re actually getting to something pertaining to Harry Potter.’)

 

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            So, stepping off the washing machine for a moment, here’re a few thoughts to ponder.

 

Characters in Harry Potter

(Yes, these are opinions, but they’re based from observation.)

 

Harry Potter:  True, he was Sorted into Gryffindor, but that was only after asking the Sorting Hat not to put him in the House that the Hat first chose:  Slytherin.  Now, Slytherins aren’t necessarily evil, but they are cunning and sly, prone to intrigue and espionage.  Harry displays many of these traits, though the ruthlessness and subtlety with which a Slytherin would accomplish such things seems to be overruled by the tendency of Gryffindor House to leap before looking.  Also, though Harry has so far managed to “do the right thing” nearly every time, many his thoughts are dark and less than charitable.  Don’t forget that he was set to kill Sirius in PoA, and had Lupin not shown up and taken charge of things, he might very well have committed his first murder that night.

            Harry has very little regard for his life.  He’s an accidental hero; he hates the attention he gets from his scar and his surviving the encounters with Voldemort, and he hates the fact that everyone expects him to be a saviour.  He’d rather be an ordinary boy with a love for Quidditch who’s perhaps a bit too nosy for his own good than be Harry Potter.  However, the darker part of Harry revels in the suffering of others upon occasion (mostly pertaining to Draco)—even plots the suffering of others upon occasion.

            Don’t forget the startling similarities between Tom Riddle and Harry either.  Though Dumbledore tells Harry to dismiss the thoughts from his mind, one can’t help but remember that Dumbledore already knows why Voldemort tried to kill Harry (the death of Harry’s parents wasn’t intended, but they insisted on protecting Harry which is why Voldemort killed them).  He stated that he would tell Harry one day, but that it was best to forget about it for now.  And as for the premise that Voldemort gave to Harry some of his power when the Killing Curse failed…  Well, if that’s so, then why did he try to kill a one-year-old child?

            Beneath the exterior of a mischievous, good-hearted Gryffindor lies a pool of adder’s poison—and it will be interesting to see what happens when Harry finally strikes.

 

Draco Malfoy:  Often made out to be either the Devil’s own son or a suddenly redeemed angel, Draco is perhaps one of the most interesting yet least canonically explored characters so far.  In fact, as I’ve told people in discussion before, what makes him so intriguing is that he’s at a pinnacle in book four:  JKR can either make him into a miniature Lucius or she can begin to develop him as an individual.  Given Draco’s unusual emotional outburst at the end of the book, I’m hoping for the latter.  If it’s the former, it will actually disappoint me.

            Draco, being the only son of a proud, aristocratic pureblood line, isn’t likely to have been physically abused.  If physical punishment was to be dealt to a child for stepping out of line, the family usually either had a whipping boy or dealt the punishment to a servant instead.  In the wizarding world, house-elves are probably ideal whipping boys…er, creatures.  However, Lucius most likely isn’t above verbal or emotional abuse, of which we get a bit of a glimpse in how often Draco parrots his father and speaks of trying to curry his father’s favour.  In fact, it may not be so much abuse as neglect, apathy on Lucius’ part towards his son.

            While Draco is a swotty prat, full of himself and his pureblood status, everything he says and does that we see appears to be influenced by his father.  The outburst at the end of book four?  That, to me, is the first glimpse (outside of the snotty yet sincere-seeming attempt at conversation in Madam Malkin’s during their first year) of the real Draco Malfoy.  This is a boy who’s always been in control of what he says and does, who has always been deliberate in his actions and only betrays himself when he means to.  And as for the idea that Draco’s always cruel, well, during the Quidditch World Cup (the Death Eater/Dark Mark scene) he isn’t being cruel, he’s actually being nice and giving them advice.  Sure, he’s about a civil as a snakebite, but he’s by no means cruel.

 

Ron Weasley:  Possibly one of the most underrated characters in most fan fiction.  Ron, while he’s the comic relief in many instances, is a very volatile, very emotional character.  He feels like he has so much to accomplish in order to come close to the type of celebrity status held by his older brothers.  He’s real in his emotions, his temper tantrums, his fits of anger in which he opens his mouth and inserts his foot without thinking about the consequences.  He’s the last son of a poor family, who’s never felt able to call anything “his.”

            Ron’s not stupid.  He’s brilliant at chess, and we never once hear his parents despair of his grades (unlike a certain Gred and Forge).  He cares for his family despite how much he makes fun of Percy and picks on Ginny.  However, because he is prone to acting before thinking, this tends to cause rifts between himself and his friends.

            Also, Ron is easy prey to jealousy.  He’s extremely jealous of Harry’s fame—a jealousy that occasionally blinds him to the truth.  Not only that, he’s also very possessive with both Hermione and Harry.  We get to see the former in GoF when he finds out that Hermione is attending the Yule Ball with Krum (remember, he like Krum before that nigh), and the latter is seen in how he so often tries to keep Harry’s attention for himself when they’re around his family.

 

Hermione Granger:  Our dear Miss Granger, who often seems as though she should have been Sorted into Ravenclaw given her fanatical study tendencies and devotion to schoolwork, still manages to be as Gryffindor-ish as they come.  Though apparently fond of rules and structure, she’s not above breaking the rule if she thinks the ends justify the means.  And she’s not above manipulating Ron and Harry into following her plans.

            Though not a “bombshell” (and she’s only fifteen in book four, so that’s not necessarily true given that she still has some growing to do), she’s definitely not ugly.    However, Hermione doesn’t worry about her physical appearance other than making certain her uniform is tidy and in good repair.  Sometimes it even seems as though Harry has more vanity than she does!

            An only child like Harry, she’s fairly close to her parents but as the years begin to pass, she seems to be finding it harder and harder to relate to her parents, seeing as how their dentists in the Muggle world.  She’s a strong believer in justice and fighting for the rights of those who can’t or won’t fight for themselves.  Her temper is nowhere near as volatile as Ron’s or Harry’s, but once you’ve made her angry, watch out:  she’s not afraid to use force to get her point across.

            In book four, we also see Hermione beginning to actually accept the notion that guys can be more than friends; first Viktor Krum’s interest in her, then Ron’s jealousy.  A bit of a relationship may be a brew between her and Ron; one that, given her level head and thoughtfulness, may help to balance out Ron’s brashness.

 

Lucius Malfoy:  Not the cookie-cutter villain that people make him out to be.  Not only that, but he didn’t attend school in the same year as MWPP, despite what people seem to think.  Sirius can’t even recall the man completely, though he said they spent some time at school together.

            An ambitious and prideful man, he’s not used to being told what he can and cannot do.  A known Death Eater, he’s very subtle about his support of the Dark Lord even though he’s politely nasty to everyone else.  Despite his nastiness, he exudes charisma (as well as money), and seems to have the Minister under his thumb.

            Mostly he’s coldly indifferent to his son and wife.  Draco has been the recipient of many a tongue-lashing; despite this, he seems to hang on his father’s every word and action.  He’s not a stupid man, though, and it’s clear that he’s a master of Slytherin planning and cunning (I refer to his actions in CoS).  It’s possible that he’s playing a deadly game of trying to appease and obey Voldemort while harbouring his own agenda.

 

Ginny Weasley:  Despite what fan fiction might tell you, little is known about the youngest and only female Weasley child.  We see in CoS that she has a bit of spunk in her, but we also see that she’s easily led and given to fits of self-doubt (most likely caused by being the only girl and the youngest).  Her innocence and fear are what made her easy prey for Tom Riddle.

            After that, not much is seen of Ginny outside of her being at the Burrow, still blushing over Harry, and being told to go away by Ron when the Gryffindor Trio want to talk in private.  Does she have potential?  Yes—every character in JKR’s world has potential.  However, I also have a feeling that the confirmed rumour that she will have a large role in the next book, as well as the confirmed rumour that there is a terrible death of one of Harry’s fans that makes him question what life and death means that Miss Weasley is going to do.  Do I have proof?  No.  And I’d like to see her given the chance to prove herself as a character, but I also know that sometimes characters have to die in order for the plot to move forward.

 

Dumbledore:  He’s not omnipotent, but he does know a lot.  Mysterious.  Manipulative.  In fact, the Headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry could very well be likened to a nutty great-uncle.

            Why do I consider him manipulative?  Because he knows things that he chooses not to tell people for whatever reason.  This often leads to people drawing their own conclusions, whether for good or ill.  It often seems that his giving or withholding information is to see what people will do.  The man spends an awful light of time with a twinkle in his eye and a smile on his lips…

 

Severus Snape:  Let’s face it:  Snape will never be beautiful, despite how disturbingly good-looking Alan Rickman was playing him.  He has a nasty temper, he’s paranoid, potentially a bit delusional, biased, tactless, uncompassionate, and possessed of a disturbing cruel streak when it comes to Gryffindors. 

            Then again, I might very well be all of these things too had I spent too much time in the company of Lucius Malfoy and Voldemort.

            Despite all of this, it’s obvious that he is truly a Potions Master, which is likely the reason Dumbledore has never offered him the job as the DADA professor (or accepted his application).  He’s extremely lenient towards the Slytherins while unduly hard on the Gryffindors.  His signature expression?  The Smirk—you know, the one that conveys that he loathes everyone equally and is very aware of how intelligent and powerful he is.

            The Grease Ball factor?  Well, given how intelligent the man seems (yes, despite his obvious down sides), this is more likely due to the fact that he’s too busy running around doing everything else to worry about proper hygiene.  Either that or it’s a genetic disorder.

 

Remus Lupin:  Soft-spoken, quiet, shy werewolf?  Who says, eh?  I mean, the man fills in for Defence Against the Dark Arts and he’s the first non-pushover professor they’ve ever had.  He’s competent and nice, sure, but he’s also very much in control (this, I feel, stems from the incident with Sirius and Snape at the Whomping Willow).  Being a werewolf, a creature that loses control of their humanity* once a month, he’s likely to exercise rigid control of both himself and his emotions when in control of his facilities.  (*Note, I use the term humanity very loosely here.  Often people call our conscience our humanity, but we all know that not all humans seem to have a conscience.)

            My biggest peeve with Remus’ characterisation is how they make him cry constantly and make him seem to easily give in to people’s demands in fan fiction.  Re-read the Shrieking Shack confrontation scene.  He was in constant control of the situation until Snape showed up.  He was the one who managed to keep Sirius from killing Pettigrew prematurely, even manhandling him into behaving.

            And my “proof” (if you’ll forgive the term) for saying that Remus/Sirius is the closest canon pairing outside of Ron/Hermione at the moment?  Not only the embrace in the Shrieking Shack and the body language toward one another, but the scene between Harry and Remus in his office.  When Harry asks about what’s under the Dementor’s hood and Remus tells him about the Dementor’s worst ability, the Kiss, and says that it’s the fate awaiting Sirius, Harry says that Sirius deserves it.  Remember, at this point, he doesn’t know how close of friends they all were, and he doesn’t know that Remus knows the “truth” that Sirius was the Potters’ Secret Keeper.  Remus asks Harry if he really thinks so, in a “light” voice, clarifying by asking Harry if he thinks anyone deserves that.

            Harry’s reply?  “For…for some things…”

            Silence follows this, and in the book, at least, we see no further interaction as far as out-of-class practises go.  Even if they weren’t lovers, there is serious devotion on the part of Remus for Sirius in that he feels Sirius doesn’t deserve to have his soul ripped from his body, even with the knowledge at the time that Sirius was “responsible” for the death of the Potters, Pettigrew, and twelve Muggle bystanders.

 

Sirius Black:  While we know that he smiled broadly and was quite handsome in the wedding photo that was in Harry’s photo album, and we know who his friends and enemies at school were, we still don’t know much about Sirius.  He’s Harry’s godfather, he spent twelve wrongfully accused years in Azkaban Prison, and he was close friends with Remus Lupin.  Other than this, we get few clues into his personality.

            He’s protective, very much so.  Though he doesn’t always seem to think things through, he strikes me as a spontaneous man rather than a callous one.  Strong in his own right (an amazing student like James Potter, according to McGonagall), this is a man who, when he sets his mind to a task, will see it through to the end.

            Was he a playboy?  Possibly, but there’s no evidence.  Did he slack off in school?  Given how fondly McGonagall had thought of him up until The Incident, it’s doubtful.  Was he loyal to his friends?  Most definitely.  Is he prone to a nasty temper, to jumping to conclusions?  Despite his spontaneity, this is also doubtful.  After twelve years in prison, he’s a man whose learned patience for things (though, I’ll admit, this isn’t much in evidence when he confront Pettigrew!)  Plus, if he had a nasty temper and such, it’s doubtful that James, Remus, and Peter would have been his closest friends for seven years.  I don’t know about you, but I wouldn’t tolerate such things from a friend no matter how great they seemed.

 

Lord Voldemort/Tom Riddle:  Well, I’m not sure I really want to touch on the subject of the Dark Lord, since he could potentially occupy an entire essay of his own.  However, I’ll try to be brief.

            There are startling, frightening similarities between Tom Riddle and Harry Potter, in the circumstances of their childhoods, their upbringings, their abilities, their attitudes, their wand cores…  And because of this, there’s the ever-burgeoning question:  Why did the nearly all-powerful Dark Lord want to kill a one-year-old child?  Hell, Harry wasn’t even a year old!

            As a student, Tom was both studious, a perfectionist, and powerful.  It’s not known if he was a loner or not, but it seems likely given his devotion to his studies and his heritage as the Heir of Slytherin that he wouldn’t have had many friends.

            The only thing about Voldemort that really bothers me right now in the canon universe is this:  He is actively against Muggle-borns and half-bloods, yet he himself is a half-blood.  In this I understand his anger towards the Muggle world, but I don’t understand his ability to have pureblood wizards not only flock to him, but follow him without question.  Given many of the pureblood families attitudes towards Muggle-borns/half-bloods, I find it highly unusual that they would allow him to lead them despite how powerful he is and who his ancestor was.

 

Narcissa Malfoy:  To me, the mystery woman of the hour—er, well, plot.  Harry describes her as a very pretty but very haughty woman, who “looks as though she’d smelt something bad” when they see/meet her at the Quidditch World Cup in book four.  At one point, Harry taunts Draco concerning his mother, and it’s one of the few times that we’re witness to the Slytherin boy losing his temper in fantastic fashion.  He tells Harry to quit talking about his mother, and even Harry realises that he should back off.  What is it about this woman that could inspire such loyalty in a boy who seems to hold loyalty only to himself?  Even when people spoke badly of his father he ignored it; apparently not so for his mother.

 

Pansy Parkinson/Millicent Bulstrode:  Though neither girl would win an award in the looks department, the former described as looking like a pug and the latter as large and blocky, it still seems that these girls must be formidable in their own right because no-one messes with them.  Pansy, as we know, is snotty and seems to share Draco’s opinion of half-bloods and Muggle-borns vs. purebloods.  She seems quite close to Draco, inferring in several instances that they’re dating—including being his date to the Yule Ball in fourth year.  Despite all of this, we never see a returned warmth from Draco towards her, leaving many to believe that their relationship is either one-sided or a complete sham.

            As far as Millicent goes, we know that she apparently is quite good with a headlock (reference to the disastrous Duelling Club meeting from second year) and seems to have a cat.  She’s also a bit of the ugly-girl bogeyman of Hogwarts for the students of her year.

 

Blaise Zabini:  The most blatant concern of most authors when writing Zabini?  What on earth is this Slytherin’s gender, of course.  I’m sorry, but it’s not really that important.  We know next to nothing about Zabini other than [his] name and House.  What an author chooses to do with Zabini is entirely up to their imagination for the moment.  There’s a possibility that we may find out more about Zabini in upcoming books, but it’s a fairly small possibility.

 

Crabbe and Goyle:  Okay, so they’re definitely not the brightest fireflies in the lantern, and often we think of them as sharing a brain.  However, you figure if they’ve made it through fifth year and we haven’t heard word that they’ve failed a class, they can’t be completely stupid.  They do seem to be Draco’s loyal toadies, and we know from the end of book four that their fathers are Death Eaters along with Lucius.

            Is this loyalty towards Draco earned?  At the moment, it’s not very likely, given that they were his goons at age eleven, and I highly doubt that eleven-year-old Draco was capable of instilling such loyalty in anyone but his mother.  Known to use fists before words, and occasionally at Draco’s behest, it’s not wonder they’re considered bullies.  However, it often seems they’d rather gorge on sweets than engage in violence. 

 

Seamus/Dean/Neville:  We know that Seamus is Irish, feisty, half-blood, and Dean’s best friend.  We know that Dean is Muggle-born, likes the West Ham soccer team, and is very good at drawing.  Neville is from a fairly powerful pureblood line, yet he often thinks he’s no better than a squib, since the only subject he seems to do well in is Herbology and he’s constantly having problems in Potions due to the fact that he constantly seems to mess up his potions in fantastic ways.

            We really don’t get to see much of these three outside of those instances.  We know that Neville has a formidable grandmother, that his parents are both in St. Mungos after having been tortured for information by Death Eaters through use of the Cruciatus Curse.  He’s a bit clumsy and forgetful, the latter of which landed him in big trouble during third year.

            Other than that?  Well, we don’t see much interaction between these three and the Gryffindor Trio, really.

 

Parvati/Lavendar:  Well, they’re girls first of all, and considered to be some of the prettiest in their year by fourth year.  They’re not the most serious of students, prone to fits of “girliness”—you know, blushing, giggling, that sort of thing.  Parvati was Harry’s date to the Yule Ball in their fourth year, and was quite put out by the fact that he was more interested in anything that didn’t involve dancing or socialising.

            In fact, both of these girls seem to be social butterflies, really.

 

And if you made it to the end of this bloody thing and are feeling brave, it concludes in the next part.