Chapter 3

Madison sighed. All should could make out were hushed voices and an occasional outburst from Zac. She had to smile. Zac sure had courage to stick up for her like that. Her smile was quickly replaced with a frown. He shouldn’t be in there arguing with his own brothers about her. It wasn’t fair and she certainly hoped Zac didn’t get in too much trouble. She had to leave. She couldn’t stay here, and she didn’t even remember why it had sounded like such a good idea when Zac had suggested it to her. She was just too lonely to listen to her mind when it said forcing Zac to convince his brothers that she should stay here was wrong. She slowly stood and stretched her aching muscles. She picked up her bag and groaned as she settled it on her shoulders. It was time to leave. She wanted to say goodbye to Zac but she knew better than interrupt their meeting. She reached the front door and turned around. "Bye Zac…thank you for everything…" she whispered before she turned the handle and opened the door.

"Madison, wait!" Zac’s excited voice startled her and she turned around to see him staring at her from the doorway of the kitchen. He was smiling and it lit up his face. His chocolate brown eyes were dancing and he quickly ran up to her. "Don’t go…you can stay. It’s fine, really!"

"Zac…I can’t stay here. It wouldn’t be right, and it was stupid of me to ever think it would be a good idea…" she stuttered, staring at the hard wood floor.

"No…don’t say that. It’s right. It’s going to be fine." Zac whispered, his excitement replaced with concern. Madison was a walking contradiction. One minute she was happy and excited, and the next she was sad and lonely. He sighed. But he was like that too and he understood all too well. He gently grabbed her hand and led her back to the sofa. "Sit." He commanded kindly, taking a seat beside her. "I know you think that this whole thing is not right, and stupid and how you’ll be in the way and everything. But it won’t be like that. I swear. It will be fun, and exciting…and…nice."

"How can you say that, Zac? You don’t even know me! You don’t know me! How do you know that I’m not some psychopath plotting to kill you and your brothers? How do you know that I’m not some witch casting a spell? How do you know that I’m not just a lonely girl with far too many problems to be staying here, with you, Zachary Hanson of the pop group Hanson?" Madison shivered and wiped away the tears that were now falling.

"You know who I am?" he asked, amazed.

"Duh, Zac. Every girl over the age of twelve knows who you are. And by the way, I’m pretty sure they all want to have your babies too..." She shook her head in amazement. How could someone so famous be so caring and dumb?

"Oh. Well, you’re right. I don’t know you, but I do know this. You are confused, alone, hungry, without a place to stay, desperate, and you seem like a really, really nice girl. Is that good enough? And I DO know that I want to help you. I want to help everyone, that’s why I play music. If my music affects one person, only one person, then I’m a happy man." Madison groaned.

"You know, you are so cheesy…"

"So is that a yes?"

"Yes…" she whispered. How had she ended up here, with Zac Hanson of all people? How had she managed to survive her two weeks on the street without him? How had she survived fifteen years without him? He seemed to complete her. She didn’t know how, she had only known him for a few hours, but he was so special to her already. It was strange, scary, and exciting all at the same time and it seemed like destiny had brought them together. It sent chills up and down her spine and she shivered.

***

"Yeah, you’re gonna absolutely love the studio!" Zac exclaimed moving his hand over to shift into fifth gear, his hand gently brushing Madison’s leg. Madison shivered and moved her leg, hoping that it wasn’t too obvious.

"Uh…Zac…do you think you could…uh…watch the road?" she asked uneasily, eyeing Zac in the driver’s seat as he weaved in and out of the Los Angeles traffic. Zac looked over at her and smiled.

"You mean like this?" he smiled mischievously as he let go of the wheel. The jeep careened to the left, riding the yellow line. Madison gasped and covered her eyes with her hands. Zac laughed and once again took control of the vehicle.

"You’re such an ass." Madison sighed. It was moments like these when she wished she had never met the person sitting beside her. He could be impossible sometimes and she guessed that’s why she cared for him so much. Zac was unpredictable and scary at times, but he was also caring and sweet, and she admired him for his qualities. She wished that they had met under different circumstances but she knew she had to take what life handed her.

"Sorry," he whispered. She glanced over at him and noticed the smirk gracing his face. She rolled her eyes and leaned her head back against the backrest. It was going to be a long day.

He sighed. For some reason he could not hit his note and he could tell that Ike and Tay were getting frustrated. He would be frustrated if he were them too. That was the fourth time he had tried that one line and every time he managed to screw it up. He ran his hand through his hair and closed his eyes. "I’m sorry, guys. Let’s try it one more time. If I don’t get it this time we’ll forget it and move on. We can always come back." There was a hint of frustration and anger in his voice and he silently cursed himself.

Isaac and Taylor nodded in agreement and they stepped up to the mic once more. The music sounded and the brothers’ harmonious voices filled the studio with the sound of heartache and pain. Zac let the music take him to his own place and he slowly closed his eyes. Music always did that for him. Music took him to a place no one else could take him to. A place where there was no fear, rejection, or loneliness. A place where Zac could be anything he wanted to be without fear of being criticized. It was a place where he could be himself without the whole world watching. For a moment, all was right with the world.

"Okay, I think we are done for the day!" Taylor exclaimed happily, lazily stretching himself out on the sofa in the room adjacent to the studio. A smile spread across his face as his eyes closed and his breathing became even.

Ike rolled his eyes. "How is it he can fall asleep in a matter of seconds like that?" he wondered aloud, looking over at Zac. Zac just shrugged and leaned against the table. His back ached and his stomach groaned for food.

"Is it okay if Mad and I leave and get something to eat?" he asked, yawning. Isaac nodded.

"Yeah, I think I’m gonna stay here a while and look over what we still have to do. And by the looks of Taylor, he’s gonna be here a while too." Isaac smiled and began leafing through a stack of papers. Zac smiled and grabbed Madison’s hand.

"C’mon. We have people to meet and places to be." He dragged her out of the room and out into the cool Los Angeles dusk. He inhaled deeply, enjoying the fresh air.

"Hey…I was thinking, we could get some takeout or something and head over to the beach. The ocean is always beautiful on nights like these." He looked over at her questionably as he steered the jeep onto the highway. Madison smiled.

"That would be great, Zac." She said softly as she gazed in his direction. His blond hair was being whipped by the wind flowing in from the open window and his chocolate brown eyes scanned down the road ahead of him. His broad shoulders led into muscular arms and his shirt accented his frame. He was beautiful…there was no denying that. To say that she wasn’t attracted to him would be a lie, but a relationship would be almost impossible, and highly unlikely.

"Um…could I have a cheeseburger, large fries, and a large Dr. Pepper please? Mad, what would you like?" she smiled as he once again used the nickname he had developed for her. No one else called her that and she liked it that way.

"Um…a small cheeseburger and a coke please." Zac nodded and repeated the order to the cashier behind the McDonalds counter. He sifted through his wallet and handed over the money to her. She accepted it gratefully and handed him his change.

"Zac…you know, I feel bad for having you…do this for me…" Madison’s cheeks flushed red and she lowered here eyes embarrassed.

"Do what? Pay for a meal that I would have paid under any circumstances?" he asked amused, as he maneuvered the car in and out of traffic.

"You know what I mean…I feel so…useless." She murmured, staring out the window as they made their way down the highway toward the ocean.

"Don’t say that. You have to know that’s not true." He looked over at the girl sitting beside him. She looked so fragile…like she would break at any moment. He swiftly glided the small vehicle into a parking space as they reached the beach. He shut off the engine and turned to face Madison. "Look, I’m not doing anything I don’t want to do." He reached out his hand and rubbed her shoulder. She flinched and shrank against the window. "I’m sorry…I didn’t mean…"

"No, it’s okay. It’s stupid really…" Madison laughed nervously and attempted a smile. A warning light was flashing over Zac’s head and an idea was forming. But before the idea could be fully shaped Madison interrupted his thoughts. "C’mon. Let’s go eat, I’m hungry!" Madison opened the door and hopped to the ground. Zac nodded slowly and he too climbed out of the jeep. He led her down to the beach where he spread out a blanket for them to sit on. No one else was around and they were left alone to enjoy their dinner. They sat in silence watching the sky turn from orange to a deep red, reflecting onto the crashing waves of the ocean. They watched as the sun glittered as it began its descent below the horizon.

"Can I ask you something?" Zac asked, breaking the silence while taking a sip of his soda.

"Sure."

"Why did you runaway here and not to relatives or something?" Silence. He glanced over his shoulder and watched as her brown hair was gently being blown by a slight sea breeze. Her shoulders were hunched and her eyes stared out at the ocean, watching the waves crash against the rocks as her fingers traced patterns in the sand. She sighed and looked over at him, her eyes staring into his.

"My mom died two years ago. Since then I’ve had no contact with her sister…my aunt. My aunt was awesome but she never got along well with my dad. I guess when my mom died she saw it as her chance to forget that we ever existed. She’s my only living relative."

"I’m…I’m sorry…" Zac reached over and pulled Madison in for a hug. She wrapped her arms around his waist and buried her face in his neck. His arms tightened around her and he felt her body shake with silent sobs. He put his chin on her shoulder and sighed. She shouldn’t be going through this much pain…not when she was so young and so nice. He closed his eyes and let his thoughts drift.

She felt so protected in his grasp…so safe…like nothing could harm her while Zac had his arms wrapped tightly around her slim frame. She sighed. She hadn’t meant to break down like this, but…god, it was so hard sometimes. And Zac hadn’t criticized her or told her she was stupid for running away from her problems like any other person would have. He understood, and that thought alone calmed her reeling brain and allowed her to slowly drift off in his arms.

He slowly opened his eyes to see nothing but the sky, the stars and the moon. His lips slowly curled into a smile and he let himself be lost in the mystery that was the sky. Movement beside him made him turn his head and see another shape beside him…Madison. She too was staring up at the sky, her eyes far away and her mouth shaped into a smile. They were so similar…yet so different. They seemed to complete each other and fill the void that each had been missing before they had met.

"Zac?" She said softly, not moving from her position beside him.

"Yeah?"

"What’s it like?"

"What’s what like?" he asked, confused, shifting so that his head rested on his hand.

"Being loved by so many people. What’s it like? You have so many people who love and admire you…it’s really quite amazing. What’s it like to know that you’re loved and appreciated? That people love you without even knowing you, Zachary Hanson, and loving you for providing them with something to believe in. What’s it like?" He had never heard so many words come out of Madison’s mouth before and he was dumbfounded. No one had ever asked him that question before, and now that she brought it up, he did not know how to answer it. Was there really an answer? Was there an answer that provided her with the knowledge that she needed? He didn’t know.

"Well…I’ve never really thought about it before. I don’t know. I guess it’s flattering and it feels…it feels weird. I love knowing that people love what we do, and love us for providing them with the words they can’t speak themselves. But I’m not sure that they love us. I guess it’s more of admiration. I don’t really see it as love." Was that enough? Would she understand what he was saying? He wasn’t sure.

"Sure they love you Zac. They really do. They love you for all of the things that you do. They love you, not what you do. It may be a one sided love, but they do. They love you and they respect you, and they…just love the fact that you’re alive. Just knowing that you’re alive is enough for them." Madison replied dreamily. He had never looked at it that way. But he supposed it was true. Their fans did love them, not what they did. He smiled. Madison had put the madness, the craziness, and the frustration of not being able to go out without being recognized into perspective. No one had ever done that for him.

"Mad, people love you too, you know. Just because you don’t see it, or don’t know it doesn’t mean it’s not true."

"No, they don’t, Zac. No one loves me. I know that you can’t grasp that idea because your parents, your friends, and your fans love you…but it’s true. The only person who has ever loved me is dead." She said sadly, wiping at her eyes furiously.

"No, no, that’s not true, Mad! People love you. Your dad loves you!" he said determined. Madison stiffened and stood up. She was shaking; he could see that in the moonlight.

"Don’t ever, ever say that again." She whispered, backing up in the sand.

"I’m…I’m sorry…I mean…I thought…I mean…" he stumbled, standing up, not taking his eyes off of her.

"Don’t. Just…um…I…I gotta go…" she turned quickly and began running down the beach, away from Zac, and away form the painful memories that haunted her.

"No! Please! Madison!" he called starting to run after the frightened girl.

"Leave me alone, leave me alone, god Dad…just go away! Please, please don’t…don’t…please…I’m sorry, I didn’t mean!" she was shouting at invisible demons, punching the air with her hands as she ran. Her brown hair was flying behind her and her eyes were faraway…distant. Zac was on her heels in a matter of seconds, sand flying up in his eyes and he furiously tried to rub it away. He could hear her shouts and began to wonder what he was actually witnessing. One quick lunge at her and he could have her down but he thought better of it. That would probably just make it worse. Instead he waited and continued to run after her.

"Oh, god, Dad, please, it hurts…it HURTS! DADDY! I LOVE YOU! PLEASE STOP!" her screams became louder and more frantic and Zac frantically tried to catch up to her. His opportunity arose when she tripped out of her sandal and landed face first into the sand, her body shaking with spasms. Zac instantly got on top of her and rolled her over. He held her by her wrists while sitting on her stomach and began whispering words of comfort that he hoped would help her. He sighed. He wasn’t sure what to do. He figured he would wait…that’s all he could do…just wait it out.

Chapter Four
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