| WHAT YOUR CAR SAYS ABOUT YOU |
- Acura Integra: I have always wanted
to own the Buick of sports cars.
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- Acura Legend: I'm too bland for German
cars.
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- Acura NSX: I am impotent.
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- Audi 90: I enjoy putting out engine
fires.
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- Buick Park Avenue: I am older than
34 of the 50 states.
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- Cadillac Eldorado: I am a very good
Mary Kay salesman.
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- Cadillac Seville: I am a pimp.
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- Chevrolet Camaro: I enjoy beating the
hell out of people.
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- Chevrolet Chevette: I like seeing people's
reactions when I tell them I have a 'Vette.
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- Chevrolet Corvette: I'm in a mid-life
crisis.
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- Chevrolet El Camino: I am leading a
militia to overthrow the government.
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- Chrysler Cordoba: I dig the rich Corinthian
leather.
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- Datsun 280Z: I have a kilo of cocaine
in my wheel well.
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- Dodge Dart: I teach third grade special
education and I voted for Eisenhower.
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- Dodge Daytona: I delivered pizza for
four years to get this car.
-
- Ferrari Testarossa: I am known to prematurely
ejaculate.
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- Ford Fairmont: (See Dodge Dart).
-
- Ford Mustang: I slow down to 85 in
school zones.
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- Ford Crown Victoria: I enjoy having
people slow to 55mph and change lanes when I pull up behind them.
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- Geo Storm: I will start the 11th grade
in the fall.
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- Geo Tracker: I will start the 12th
grade in the fall.
-
- Honda Civic del Sol: I have always
said that half a convertible is better than no convertible at all.
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- Honda Civic: I have just graduated
and have no credit.
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- Honda Accord: I lack any originality
and am basically a lemming.
-
- Infiniti Q45: I am a physician with
17 malpractice suits pending.
-
- Isuzu Impulse: I do not give a damn
about J.D. Power or his reports.
-
- Jaguar XJ6: I am so rich I will pay
60K for a car that is in the shop 280 days per year.
-
- Kia Sephia: I learned nothing from
the failure of Daihatsu Corp.
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- Lamborghini Countach: I only have one
testicle.
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- Lincoln Town Car: I live for bingo
and covered dish suppers.
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- Mercury Grand Marquis: (See Lincoln
Town Car).
-
- Mercedes 500SL: I will beat you up
if you ask me for an autograph.
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- Mercedes 560SEL: I have a daughter
named Bitsy and a son named Cole.
-
- Mazda Miata: I do not fear being decapitated
by an eighteen-wheeler.
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- MGB: I am dating a mechanic.
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- Mitsubishi Diamante: I don't know what
it means either.
-
- Nissan 300ZX: I have yet to complete
my divorce proceedings.
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- Oldsmobile Cutlass: I just stole this
car and I'm going to make a fortune off the parts.
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- Peugeot 505 Diesel: I am on the EPA's
Ten Most Wanted List.
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- Plymouth Neon: I sincerely enjoy doing
the Macarena.
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- Pontiac Trans AM: I have a switchblade
in my sock.
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- Porsche 911 Turbo: I have a three inch
thingie.
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- Porsche 944: I am dating big haired
women that otherwise would be inaccessible to me.
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- Rolls Royce Silver Shadow: I think
Pat Buchannon is a tad bit too liberal.
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- Saturn SC2: (See Honda Civic).
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- Subaru Legacy: I have always wanted
a Japanese car even more inferior than Isuzu.
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- Toyota Camry: I am still in the closet.
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- Volkswagon Beetle: I still watch Partridge
Family reruns.
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- Volkswagen Cabriolet: I am out of the
closet.
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- Volkswagen Microbus: I am high right
now.
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- Volvo 740 Wagon: I am frightened of
my wife.
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| Notes on the material appearing on this page: |
- Created, edited or updated on: 06.04.99
- Copyright information: Copyright holder not
known
- $idekick's laugh-o-meter rating: 9
(if you only knew how accurate these are)
|
