- CARPERPETUATION (kar' pur pet u a shun) n. The act, when vacuuming,
of running over a string or a piece of lint at least a dozen times, reaching
over and picking it up, examining it, then putting it back down to give
the vacuum one more chance.
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- DISCONFECT (dis kon fekt') v. To sterilize the piece of candy you
dropped on the floor by blowing on it, somehow assuming this will 'remove'
all the germs.
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- ECNALUBMA (ek na lub' ma) n. A rescue vehicle which can only be
seen in the rearview mirror.
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- EIFFELITES (eye' ful eyetz) n. Gangly people sitting in front of
you at the movies who, no matter what direction you lean in, follow suit.
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- ELBONICS (el bon' iks) n. The actions of two people maneuvering
for one armrest in a movie theater.
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- ELECELLERATION (el a cel er ay' shun) n. The mistaken notion that
the more you press an elevator button the faster it will arrive.
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- FRUST (frust) n. The small line of debris that refuses to be swept
onto the dust pan and keeps backing a person across the room until he finally
decides to give up and sweep it under the rug.
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- LACTOMANGULATION (lak' to man gyu lay' shun) n. Manhandling the
"open here" spout on a milk container so badly that one has to
resort to the 'illegal' side.
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- PEPPIER (pehp ee ay') n. The waiter at a fancy restaurant whose
sole purpose seems to be walking around asking diners if they want ground
pepper.
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- PHONESIA (fo nee' zhuh) n. The affliction of dialing a phone number
and forgetting whom you were calling just as they answer.
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- PUPKUS (pup' kus) n. The moist residue left on a window after a
dog presses its nose to it.
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- TELECRASTINATION (tel e kras tin ay' shun) n. The act of always
letting the phone ring at least twice before you pick it up, even when
you're only six inches away.
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