(Cue blaring brass orchestra playing the Mr. Prince theme song of an cinema icon that's been around for more than forty years and who certainly does not need this much 'intro' screen time. Segue into the superlong theme, "The Cook Who Loved Me" sung by accomplished torch singer and red-headed siren Nami, accompanied by the elaborate opening credit sequence…)

I wasn't looking,

(Nami is lounging on the deck of the GMG.)

but somehow he found me,

(Sanji pops up out of nowhere.  He's wearing his Mr. Prince glasses and has with him - )

I tried to hide from his Chocolaaaaate Deliiiiight.

( - a scrumptious chocolate confection from the kitchen!)

Like the stars above me, the cook who loved me

(Zoom in on heart eye Mr. Prince!)

Is feedin all my crewmates well tonight!

(Montage of the Straw Hat Pirates.)

And nobody does it better,
Though sometimes I wish someone could.

(Nami ignores Mr. Prince -)

Nobody does it quite the way he does,

(- while he beats the ever-loving stuffing out of Luffy and Usopp who have attempted a daring raid on Nami's untouched desert.  Nami finally breaks down and has a teeny tiny taste.)

Why does he have to cook so good?

(Her face wears the equivalent expression of saying: "Hot damn! Death by chocolate is the sweetest way to die!")

The way that you hold me,

(Nami almost faints from the chocolate sinful goodness.  Mr. Prince tries to perform 'pre-emptive' rescue breathing.)

Whenever you pay me to let you hold me

(Mr. Prince learns that is a very bad idea if you don't have an excellent credit rating and lots of collateral..)

There's some kind of magic inside your food.

(Nami can't help herself though.)

That keeps me from runnin' but just keep it comin'

(She asks for seconds.)

How'd he learn to cook the things he do?

(Montage of Zeff, Patti and Carne.  Patti is holding a sign that says, "This song has horrible grammar.")

And nobody does it better,
it makes me feel sad for the rest

(Montage of hard tack, rancid water, sloppy stew and sad scurvy pirates.)

Nobody can cook half as good as him,
Why does he have to cook so good?

(End song.  Mr. Prince hasn't gotten anything except a really chocolate stuffed Nami - who still rejects him, but hey, you can't win them all! Even if you are a master super-spy/cook of love.)

==================

(Mr. Prince walks into the Head Office of the Triple X division.  His boss, B, is waiting for him.)

Mr. Prince (glumly): What happened to Miss Labor Day?

B (coolly): She's on maternity leave.

(The intercom buzzes.)

Voice: Is "Supervillain" filed under "S" for Supervillain or "V" for Villain, Super?

B: Whatever you think is best, Mr. Red-beard.

Mr Prince (flatly): You hired a man.

B: You're very observant.

Mr Prince: On purpose!

B (moving on): Mr. Prince, this is your assignment.  We have discovered that a hero of the people is actually the head of a criminal organization intent on taking over the world.  One of our agents has infiltrated the organization - but she's in over her head.  I want you to continue the mission - make contact with our agent and take out the man known as Crocodile.

Mr. Prince: Our agent is female, right?

B (sighing): Yes, Mr. Prince.  Now go down to U and get fitted with your new equipment.

====================

(In U Division.  The man know as 'U' is escorting the easily distracted Mr. Prince through the amazing technology labs of their secret headquarters.  Men and women in lab coats test dangerous new toys that will be used in the fight against evil - and whose designs will be copied and put in the newest video games systems!)

U: Mr. Prince?

Mr. Prince (yawns): Yes, U, go on.

(U picks up a pair of innocent-looking glasses from a table.)

U: These are your new glasses.  They have a radio transmitter, GPS chip, a voice inquiry automated full reference encyclopedia set, small cat glossary, the entire recipe collection of Julia Child and if you press this button here you will find that the glasses double as -

Mr. Prince: Are they X-ray glasses?  Can I see women's panties if I wear those glasses?

(Mr. Prince snatches them out of Usopp's hands and puts them on.  He looks at Usopp and screams., then tears the glasses off.)

U (dryly): If you press that button, you can see everyone's underthings.  Now pay attention, Mr. Prince.

(U goes into a very detailed and longwinded explanation of amazingly advanced technological achievements that could possibly save Mr. Prince's life.  Mr. Prince examines his tie and wonders if the next one he buys should have tiny gray pinstripes or if he should stick with the plain black.  Solids really went well with his suit, he muses, but spy fashion seemed to be leaning towards patterns this season.  Grey was going to be the new 'black' or so he'd heard - )

U: But that's only in an emergency.  You understand that, Mr. Prince?  Only in an emergency!

Mr. Prince: Yup.  Emergency.

U (sighing): And try to bring it back in one piece, Mr. Prince.

===========================
Random Quote Analysis

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory. - Anon

Nojiko: My conscience is clear … and I remember every cartilage cracking moment.
(Kohza is finally unconscious. And it had nothing to do with the beer.)
Nojiko (wiping her hands off on her pants): That'll teach him.
[That was really cool, the way you reached through the bars of your cage and then his cage and then beat him into a bloody pulp.]
Nojiko:  Thanks. I think I broke a nail.
[Only there's a problem with that.]
Nojiko: I did break a nail.  Crud.  Is there a nail file around here?
[No matter how much fun we could have karaoking the nights away - ]
Nojiko: Which we can't because we're out of batteries.
[ - I must point out that are immutable laws of the RQA space and I fear - ]
Nojiko: Because you're cheap.  Almost as cheap as Nami.
[ - that you must...no one is as cheap as Nami.]
Nojiko: Yeah.  You're right. Where's my nail file?
[As I was saying, because there are immutable laws of the RQA space, you will be required to leave.]
Nojiko: What?  Why?  Did I do something wrong?
[Other than beating Kohza into a puddle?  Yes.  You're exhibiting strong tendencies that indicate a potential take-over.]
Nojiko: So you figured it out.  Yes, I had an elaborate plot to muscle in on your territory and expand my thug-land operations.
[Was Gen gonna help out?]
Nojiko: Eh.  His weapons collection was. So this means I'm gone?
[Yup.  Sorry.  There can be only one.]
Nojiko: That wasn't funny.

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Things Explained
Do I need to explain the "Sanji is British so is James Bond" connection? Well I won't.
Mangled James Bond theme song is the "The Spy Who Loved Me" by some woman from the movie of the same name.