Almost five hours later, Em and Andy sat in Andy’s living room. They’d left Lynn’s and gone to Reny’s, then it was off to the grocery store for snow peas (for Em) and Goldfish (for Andy), finally to Andy’s house to shower and get ready for what would probably be one of the two’s infamous late-niters. Neither one was much of a sleeper. Andy always had trouble falling asleep and Em had trouble staying asleep unless she was dead tired. Either way, they were usually up and always preferred company.
Right then, the two munched on their respective snacks and talked about everything but what was bothering Andy. He was stretched out on the couch and Em sat on the floor with one arm propped up on his belly. She’d periodically prod his muscles while he spoke in retaliation for him pelting her with Goldfish. They were both quiet for a little bit before Andy heaved a sigh.
“Emmy….” He started. He picked up her hand that lay on his chest and began to knead it to give him something to focus on. “Emmy, I’m really lonely. And I don’t know what to do about it.”
“Have you talked to Reny about it?” Em asked without really needing an answer. Andy and Reny had always been really close. Something about being the “baby”, the “favorite”, and a child of a “broken home” brought them together.
“Yeah. But, there’s something else.” Andy slid off the couch and next to Em on the floor. “It’s Mae. I think I’m falling in love with her again.”
“Again?” Em questioned. “What the two of you had was great Andy, but I don’t think anybody would call it being ‘in love’.”
“I guess so. But Emmy, when I see her with Cam…I, I just think to myself…that’s my son, but that’s not my wife.” Andy looked into Em’s eyes. “It’s not the life I had planed for myself. I was supposed to be happy and I’m not.”
“Oh Sweetheart.” Em said, her heart breaking for her friend. She reached out and pulled his curly head towards her. “Baby, it’ll work out. Just because you haven’t found your match yet doesn’t mean that you don’t have one. And happiness will come too. You know I believe in that.”
“Yeah, I know.” Andy slumped against Em’s shoulder and let her mother him. “But it’s so hard to trust people. I mean, ever since Mae it’s just been one fake after another. The only women that I trust are either related to me, married to my friends, or Mae and Lulu.”
“When is it the worst for you?” Em asked, rubbing his shoulder.
“At night. It’s always at night. I ride that damn tour bus all alone, no videogames playing in the background, no Anton snoring, no computer keys clickin, no cell phones ringing. Just quiet. And then I come home…I see Jacks and Sean, I see Reny and Scott, and I’m so jealous. They’ve all got somebody to hold them at night, and I’ve got,” Andy let out a hurt laugh. “I’ve got a lot of jewelry.”
“And then you look at Mae…” Em trailed off, allowing him to finish the thought.
“I look at Mae and I see what my future should have been.”
“Hey, “ Em said sharply. She moved away slightly so he had to look at her. “Do you know the sort of future the two of you would have had?” She didn’t wait for an answer. “The type of future your mother and father would have had together. Don’t you see that Andy?” He turned his head and closed his eyes, but she tapped his chin. “If your parents would have stayed together Lynn never would have met Mark, and look how great they are together. That didn’t happen right away. You and Mae love each other, I know that. But it’s not the kind of love you can build a marriage on. And you love your son way too much to put him through a divorce.”
“The situation we have now is just like a divorced family.”
“In the fact that he spends half his time with you and half with Mae, yeah, it is like a divorce. But in the fact that he’s never seen his parents fighting, never seen them hate each other, and never seen them go through an ugly court settlement, it’s nothing like divorce. Cameron’s a very smart little boy Andy; he knows that his mother and father…even though they don’t live together, love both him and each other. This isn’t about Cameron and you know it.” “So then what do I do Emmy?” Andy whimpered.
“You do the thing you do best Andy. You allow women to love you, and one of them is going to be your one and only. I know that you have to be careful about who you trust.” Em smiled. “Hell, you know for a fact that I’m the last person to ever trust anybody, but you’ve got to do it if you want love. Why not ask for some help? You’d trust my opinion of somebody, or Reny’s or Jacks’ for that matter. We’d never pick somebody that would hurt you.”
“And if she ever did, you’d slaughter her.” Andy managed a half-grin.
“Exactly. Because we love you, and we want you happy.”
“You love me.” Andy mumbled. “And what about you Em? Are you happy?”
“Yeah, I am. Anton balances me like nobody else ever has.”
“He doesn’t deserve you.” Andy whispered.
“He doesn’t?”
“No.” Andy locked eyes with Em. He ran his thumb over her lips. “You’ve got a beautiful mouth.” Em narrowed her eyes slightly.
“I love him Andy.”
“And, “ he paused “you love me.”
“You’re right. I love you with my heart and soul Andy.”
“Will you sleep with me tonight?”
“Have I ever said no before?” Em said smiling. Andy got to his feet and helped Em up.
“Why didn’t I get to you first Emmy?” Andy asked as the two walked up the stairs to Andy’s bedroom.
“You were too busy being Reny’s brother and Mae’s lover?” She teased.
“Oh yeah.” He said, kissing her hand. Em laughed and rubbed his cheek with her knuckle. They climbed under the covers and held each other close. “What will Anton say?” Andy said into the darkness.
“He won’t say anything. Because he doesn’t need to even find out.” Em answered, and closed her eyes with a sigh.