Jordan leaned down, brushing aside her eldest son’s shiny curls and placing a gentle kiss on his forehead. As Justin leaned in to do the same she wandered over to the doorway, whispering a goodnight and heading out of the room, her husband not far behind her.
“Is Noah out cold too?” Justin inquired, coming up behind Jordan as she started towards the carpeted steps leading to the main floor.
Turning around at Justin’s questioning, Jordan smiled slightly as their eyes met in the dimly lit hallway. “Yeah, he didn’t even wake up when I changed him into his pajamas.” she laughed. “Your mom must have really worn them out today, they were exhausted.”
“I feel their pain.” Justin stated, tiredly rubbing a hand over his face as he stifled a yawn.
Jordan nodded as she gestured downstairs. “Well, I’m just gonna go shut off the lights and make sure everything’s locked up down there,” she trailed off. Starting down the first few steps, she paused and turned back to her husband who was making his way down the hall towards the master bedroom. “Justin?” she called out, awaiting his reply.
“Yep?” he returned from his position near the bedroom door.
“Um...if you’re not too tired I’d really like to talk.”
Yawning loudly, Justin agreed. “Oh...okay. I’ll be in here whenever you’re ready.”
Heading down the remainder of the staircase, Jordan’s mind spun with the remnants of the talk she’d had earlier with JC. Her heart plead with her to remain calm, that nothing was wrong...it was just a million coincidences, nothing more. April was her best friend, and Justin her husband. He’d promised her forever. Her mind screamed that forever was a long time, and people break their promises. She resisted desperately against the thought of the only man she’d ever dared to let into her heart, shattering it so completely.
Making her way into the kitchen, she snapped off the switch that cascaded light onto the stainless steel sink before heading through the darkness to the front door. Checking the lock and turning on the alarm, Jordan sighed before starting upstairs once more. Reaching the second floor, she turned and walked the short distance down the hall to the room she shared with Justin. Taking a deep breath, trying hard to push her emotions and heartache aside, she entered the room and glanced around the dimly lit surroundings.
“Justin?” she whispered softly, noticing her husband lying on the bed, the bare skin of his back facing her. Her eyes wandered over his honey colored flesh, over every curve of the well toned muscle as she stepped around the king sized bed to sit beside him.
Locking her eyes upon Justin’s flawless face, Jordan’s heart melted. His baby blues had shut out the world after succumbing to exhaustion, leaving his face serene and angelic. Jordan reached out, trailing a slender finger over his cheekbone before continuing down to his lush lips. Lingering upon his full pout, she then moved down to draw an invisible line over his strong jaw line, pulling her hand away when Justin began to stir in his slumber.
Standing up, Jordan sighed deeply before moving to prepare herself for bed as well. Lying down beside her husband, she willed sleep to comfort her as the paranoia and worry that still plagued her began darting in and out of her thoughts.
****
“So how was everything? Did you guys have fun?” JC inquired, turning on his side to look at his girlfriend. Pulling on a green tank top, April shot him a strange look as she headed into the adjoining bathroom.
“What? Oh...New York, it was fine. Busy though...I’m sure you know how that is.” April replied casually as she reached forward to turn on the faucet.
JC rose from the bed and wandered over to the bathroom where April stood brushing her teeth before responding, “Yeah...I guess I do. Uh...did you guys do any sightseeing at all?”
April spit a mouthful of toothpaste into the sink before wiping her mouth and turning back to JC, planting a minty fresh kiss upon his pouty lips. “Nope, no time.” she said swiftly, brushing past him to re-enter the bedroom. Flopping down lifelessly onto the fluffy comforter, she smiled at her boyfriend. “Enough about my boring business trip though...what did you do while I was gone?”
JC shrugged slightly as he made his way over to join April in bed. Sliding a well toned arm around her tiny waist, the dark haired man sidled up next to his girlfriend before placing a gentle kiss on the soft skin of her shoulder. “Well let’s see...” he began thoughtfully. “I spent some time with Brad and Alex yesterday...and today I hung out with Jordan. We had lunch.” he explained, his voice laced with tiredness.
April turned her head to give JC a sideways glance. “Aww, how is she? I haven’t talked to her in so long. Were the boys there too?”
“Nope. They were spending the day with Lynn and Paul. I’m sorry I missed them though, I haven’t seen Noah since he really started talking well.”
“Yeah, he‘s not quite the conversationalist Zach was at that age, but he speaks really well when he can get a word in edge-wise.”
JC paused for a moment, wondering if he should present the question his heart was pleading with him to ask. Finally he spoke, “So uh...did Justin tell you that I called?”
“Oh...um...yeah, he did.” April replied quickly. “Sorry I didn’t call you back...” she trailed off uneasily.
JC frowned as April continued. “But hey...I wanted to ask you...since I’m taking the day off tomorrow, what do you want to do?”
Noting the sudden change of subject, JC stifled a yawn as he replied to his girlfriend’s question. “I don’t care, it’s up to you.”
Shaking her head firmly, April spoke, “Nope, it’s your choice. I‘ll give you tonight to sleep on it and come up with something fun.”
Murmuring his agreement, JC closed his eyes as sleep overtook him, tumbling his subconscious into dreams filled with confusion and heartache.
****
Jordan stretched her arms over her head as she blinked tiredly against the shock of orange that filtered in through the windows within the master bedroom. Glancing to her left, she was met with the empty space and rumpled sheets Justin had left behind. Hearing Zachary’s shouts and laughter through the door, she sat up straight and looked at the clock. Noticing it was already eleven AM, she frowned, wondering why the boys hadn’t woken her as they usually did every morning. Rising from the bed, Jordan opened the door and stumbled into the hallway, rubbing her eyes as she walked uneasily upon her unresponsive limbs. Halfway down the steps, she heard Justin’s jubilant laughter and she remembered it was Friday, the day he’d promised to spend with his family.
Wandering into the family room, Jordan stopped and smiled at the sight that sprawled out before her. Justin was laying on his side upon the overstuffed sofa, Noah cradled in front of him and Zach perched comfortably in the nook between his back and the cushions. Cartoons blared from the television as the three of them smiled contentedly at the screen.
“Are girls allowed or is this a boys only event?” Jordan asked as she wandered over to the couch, kneeling down beside her family as she awaited an answer.
“BOYS ONLY!” Zach shouted, raising the remote in his hand as if he were brandishing a sword.
Arching a brow, Justin shrugged. “I didn’t know we were exclusive. Are you sure your momma can’t join us Z?”
Noah sat up and wrapped his arms lovingly around his mother’s neck. “Stay Momma.” he said softly.
Jordan laughed as Zach pouted briefly, then relented. “Fine, you can stay.” he stated firmly. “But none of that gushy stuff or you’re OUTTA HERE!” he screeched obnoxiously.
Nodding her head in agreement, Jordan dodged Justin’s lips as he leaned forward to give her a good morning kiss. “Okay, none of that gushy stuff. Got it.” she repeated.
Justin hung his head in defeat before laying back down, “Foiled again, and by my own flesh and blood. Can’t you see what you’re doin’ to me here Zach?” he asked, reaching up to tickle his son, deftly slipping the remote from his grasp. Sitting upright, Justin quickly flipped off the television, much to Zach’s dismay.
“Heyyy!” he squealed loudly, reaching for the remote his father now held.
“Why don’t you show your momma what you got this morning?” Justin suggested, pointing towards the easy chair where a pair of brightly colored toys rested.
“Okay...” Zachary grumbled, hopping off of the couch and bringing both toys over, placing one gently in Noah’s hands. Plopping down on the floor next to his mother and younger brother, Zach smiled charmingly at Jordan. “See what Dad and April brought us from New York?” he asked eagerly, admiring his new plaything with bright eyes.
Noah grinned, clutching his toy from where he sat on his mother’s lap. “Daddy and April brought presents.” he said solemnly, nodding his head as he continued to examine the brightly colored object in his hands.
Biting her lip, Jordan’s hazel eyes grew stormy and she forced herself to smile at her sons. “Wow...those are really cool. Did you tell Daddy thank you?”
“Thanks Dad.” Zach said, standing up to climb back onto the couch in order to hug his father.
Noah scooted off of Jordan’s lap and stood, smiling brightly up at his father, who was receiving a barrage of hugs from his eldest son. “Thank you Daddy.” he said sweetly before turning to give his mother a wet kiss on the cheek.
Lifting her slender frame up off of the carpeted floor, Jordan smiled down at her children. “Boys...do you want to take your toys up to the playroom for awhile? Momma and Daddy need to talk for a little bit.” she stated calmly, although the familiar hurt stirred wildly within her heart as all of the emotion from the past day or so came flooding back.
“Okay...come on Noah.” Zachary replied, reaching out for his little brother’s chubby fingers as the pair headed out of the room towards the stairwell.
“What was that all about?” Justin questioned curiously, glancing up at Jordan as he awaited an answer.
Placing a hand on her hip, Jordan sighed inwardly before answering her husband. “We need to talk...we never got to last night because you fell asleep.” she explained.
“Okay...come sit down and let’s talk. What do you wanna talk about?” he responded, patting the cushion next to him.
Not moving from where she stood, Jordan spoke once more. “Justin why did you lie to me about New York?”
“What do you mean?”
“You know what I mean...you lied to me. You looked at me and said you were going alone.”
Shrugging, Justin’s eyes grew troubled. “So what? April always goes with me on business trips, you know that just as well as I do. I forgot to mention it...no big deal.”
“I just don’t understand Justin...I’m trying to understand...but it just doesn’t make much sense to me.” Jordan said simply.
“What doesn’t make sense?” Justin replied, his tone becoming exasperated as he stared at Jordan in disbelief.
“If it was no big deal then why was April in your bedroom at two in the morning?” Jordan asked, her dark eyes accusing as she glared at her husband.
“What are you saying here?” Justin stood, his voice raising several octaves.
Jordan tossed up her hands in frustration, her heart bursting with a million accusations and questions as she met her husband’s intense blue eyes. “I don’t really know what I’m saying Justin. All I’m saying is that something’s not right anymore. Not right between us. I don’t know if that something’s me...or if it’s you...or if it’s someone else. All I know is that you’re not the same Justin I fell in love with. You’re just this distant, empty person who’s so involved in their own life that they can’t possibly find any time to spend at home, with the people that care about them most. What’s happening to us Justin? What are you doing to our family?” Jordan stopped, biting back the question that she wanted, needed to know the answer to most of all. Awaiting Justin’s reply, her anger began building, causing her temper to flare as she stared at the silent man before her.
“Why won’t you just tell me that it was nothing? Why don’t you say I’m overreacting? I’m sure you know what I’m thinking...please, please tell me that I’m wrong.” Jordan begged, her voice breaking slightly as her eyes filled with tears. Justin stood, his face expressionless and void of emotion as he stared back at her as though he was seeing right through her. “Justin...what was she doing in your room at two AM?” she asked once more, struggling to keep the tears from spilling over as she awaited her husband‘s answer.
Justin’s blue eyes filled with pain as he averted his gaze from Jordan‘s piercing brown eyes. Steadying himself, he regained his composure then spoke in a soft, calm tone. “Jordan I won’t talk to you when you’re like this.” he stated.
“What?!” she demanded as he brushed past her and headed towards the front entryway, pausing only to grab his car keys off of the table.
“Calm down, and then we’ll talk about it.” he stated simply, not glancing back at her as he opened the door and headed towards his silver sports car that rested in the driveway.
“Fine, just run away from our problems again Justin. Go to your mommy and she’ll make it all better.” Jordan shouted after him from the doorway as he got into his car and started down the driveway. Her frustration building to the point of explosion, Jordan hit the palm of her hand against the doorframe as her husband drove away. “Or maybe April will comfort you in your time of need...give ya a nice sympathy fu--”
“Momma?” Zach interrupted, gazing uneasily up at Jordan from where he stood in the front entryway.
Leaning her forehead against the doorframe, Jordan sighed. “Yes Zach?”
“Why were you yelling at Dad?”
Kneeling down to her son’s level, she spoke softly. “You know how sometimes when you act naughty, I have to yell at you?”
Zach nodded, a puzzled look gracing his cherub like features. “Was Dad a bad boy?”
Jordan smiled. “Kinda...”
“Did he forget to put his bath toys away?” Zachary inquired, trying hard to remember other times he had gotten in trouble.
“Stupid sonofabitch.” Noah stated proudly, causing Jordan and Zach to glance over at where he sat perched on his favorite step. Shaking her head, Jordan crooked her index finger at her baby, motioning for him to join her and Zachary on the main floor.
Putting her arms around her children, Jordan gently kissed them both on the forehead before speaking. “Noah, you shouldn’t call Daddy that, it’s not nice. He loves you very much...and it would hurt his feelings, okay?”
“Okay Momma.” Noah agreed, his curls bouncing as he shook his head up and down fervently.
“What about me, does Daddy love me?” Zach inquired, tilting his head slightly as he awaited his mother’s reply.
Jordan smiled. “Yes Zach, he does. He loves you both more than anything else in this world.” she insisted.
His brown eyes opening wide, Zachary looked at his mother in shock. “More than ice cream?”
“Yep.” Jordan stated with a firm nod.
“More ‘dan Chris?” Noah asked, not wanting to be left out.
Jordan nodded with a laugh, “Yeah, even more than Chris. Although Chris is Daddy’s best friend and he loves him, he still loves you two more.”
Smiling brightly, Zachary ran a small hand over his mother’s chestnut locks. “Momma, does Dad love you the most?”
At such an innocent question from the mouth of her eldest child, Jordan’s eyes filled with sparkling tears as she spoke softly in response. “Hmm...what do you think?”
Leaning in, his eyes dancing Zach whispered his reply. “He does.”
At her son’s assured reply, Jordan’s tears spilled onto her bronzed cheeks as she mustered a smile and placed a loving kiss on the top of both sons’ curl covered heads. Wishing she had such unwavering confidence in the answer to that question, Jordan continued to struggle against the battle raging within her heart and soul.