Instructions:

1. Click the red button next to each answer you think is most correct.
2. When finished, click the "Click When Finished" button at the end of the test. Your score will appear below it, and all correct answers will be lit with a green button.
3. Refer to the table at the bottom to see how Japanese you have become.

Note: This is for entertainment purpose only! And to allow the Japanese government to track the progress of assimilation. The results of this test will be used to adjust the amount of mind control drugs used in soft drinks, water, and liquor.

 

Score:

100- You have become one of them (the Japanese). Your individual thought and urge to cook meat before eating it has been taken away. Soon you will believe you are the greatest karaoke singer in the world. Your Japanese passport is currently being processed.

090- You are the gaijin samurai. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to do everything Japanese in culture and habit, but do so like a foreigner (as graceful as a rhino suffering from hemorrhoids doing the ballet).

080- You are the Diet Coke of Japanese assimilation. Just one calorie, but just not Japanese enough.

070- Congratulations! You have achieved an AVERAGE score. So how does it feel to be AVERAGE. The AVERAGE gaijin in Japan, on AVERAGE gets an AVERAGE score. Hey, that's you!

060- They have gotten to you. But do not lose heart, you can be saved. Simply speak English loud and proud! Then when the locals stare, snicker, scoff, and give you the evil eye, you will know you are back on the path to being gaijin. Once you stop being Japanese you will become dis-oriented! Hehehe! (Ah, come on! Admit it, that was funny!)

050- Can't you make up your mind? Just be assimilated or not assimilated. To be or not to be. That is the question. The answer...fly the middle path and you are less likely to piss people off! Way to go!

040- You are desperately holding on to strands of your foreign origin. I hate to be the one to break it to you, but after a couple more technological inovations by Sony, your ass is theirs!

030- You tried on Japanese life a bit, it didn't suit you, so you have settled on enjoying a few new experiences. You are the poster child for tying a huge rubberband around your feet but never jumping off the bridge. "Wuss!" (said the hypocrite)

020- You have maintained your sanity. Um...yeah, so why are you in Japan?

010- No, this does not mean you are a perfect ten. Then again, if you are, give me a call. Then again, how do I know if you are female or not. Then again, this is the internet, who cares?

000- What have you been doing? You got a zero? I guess this goes to prove that watching Japanese porn videos while locked in your tiny little apartment is not considered a cultural experience. Just for your unwillingness to get out there into Japan, I am forced to confiscate all of your porn videos! *sigh* What a difficult responsibility.

 

 

Contact me: mugetsu@hotmail.com