Songs Written by Yours Truely: Me!


NO ONE

the water rolls up on me
while i think of what i gave up
realizing that i’ll never smile
and i’ll never laugh again
seeing you being washed away
wasn’t how i pictured it at all
but it doesn’t matter what you say
when you’re pushed way down under

standing among the silence
i felt my heart being lifted
and i knew that it was you
letting me know you won’t leave

feeling you’re presence inside
while i’m alone without you
these feelings aren’t easy to hide
you know i’ll always love you

and i can’t say that i’m sad
cause i know you’re better off
and i can’t say that mad
everything happens for a reason

picturing us together one last time
and watching tears fall from my eyes
and i realize that i’ve never been so loved
and i’ll never find anyone quite like you
no one will treat me like you did
no one could treat me like you did

REFLECTION

laying on the floor
while everyone worries
but really i’m okay
i find it kind of neat
to see things from somewhere new
and that’s all it was
and that’s all it’ll ever be

the reflection in the window
and the chair legs all crossed
the way the ceiling looked
it made me think this world
isn’t as empty as i thought
and i want to spend it
knowing that i’m helping
that i’m changing peoples lives

keeping to myself
opens me up to the unseen
and i know you care
but really i’m fine
i find it comforting
that i can see what’s not obvious
and i can share it with you

the reflection in the window
and the chair legs all crossed
the way the ceiling looked
it made me think this world
isn’t as empty as i thought
and i want to spend it
knowing that i’m helping
that i’m changing peoples lives

and i want to do all that
i want to share all that
with you
with me
-Kristin Isphording

BUT WAIT

I wish there was a way for us,
to be together sooner,
every time i see you,
my heart begins to melt,

when your eyes meet mine,
i turn my head the other way,
but wait..
you were starring at me too,

I know you don’t have much time,
and i won’t take it all up,
i just want to be there,
for you when you’re lost,

your hand grazed mine,
i tried hard to contain my smile,
but wait..
you were smiling too,

my friends tell me that,
we’d be perfect together,
do you ever dream about it,
i do, every night,

your head resting on mine,
i wish my heart wouldn’t beat so fast,
but wait..
yours is beating fast too,

as i lay in my bed,
I pray for a life,
that i could spend with you,
just making you happy,

but wait...
...you’re conflicted.

A GLIMPSE

a glimpse inside of you
i noticed how much you care
please just talk to me now
tell me all the things you fear

let me stay safe with you
the night sky means so much more
when you’re watching it pass by
with someone you crave

and show me now that it’s okay
if i need some help sharing
everything that i think about
i don’t want any regrets

touch my face with yours
and your cold hands
my eyes close for a second
i need to find me again

i lose myself inside you
and it’s never been so nice
to know that i’m wanted
i’ll stay here waiting

so take the time you need
to realize if this is what you want
cause i’m not going away
i won’t move on until you say to

a glimpse inside of you
2/15/02

DANCE UPON THE STARS

Dancing upon the stars
lights glowing on my face
my friends are all with me
here we stay for always

and i love them all to death
without them i’d be lifeless
i would give myself for them
and we’ll always be dancing
up above the pain forever

my hair is blowing around
from all of the twirling i do
and we laugh the night away
and we’ll always be this way

and i’ll love them all of my life
without them i couldn’t live
i would do anything for them
and we’ll always be dancing
up above the pain forever

light steps up on cloud 9
you can always look up at the sky
you’ll find the best advice there
feel so small compared to stars

and i’ll always love my friends
for they are what keeps me alive
and up with the stars is our place
we’ll always feel small near them
and we’ll always dance upon them

SOME FRIEND, IN THE END

both of us have been through a lot
but the sun has always come out
and i hate to say this to you now
but i just really need to let you know

I have always looked up to you
but it’d be better for me now
if you’d just disappear
cause you’re doing it just to hurt me
and now i see right through you

some people put others down
to make themselves feel better
tell me, is that what you’re doing
you have no problem hurting me

and I'll risk this friendship for myself
cause i know he means more
please just disappear
you’re doing all this just to hurt me
and now i see right through you

looking over to see the two of you
watching you flirt with him obviously
makes me sick to my stomach to know
that he doesn’t see through you too

-Kristin Isphording
February 6, 2002

THIS IS MY MIRACLE

under the stars with you
i find that i am content
my life couldn’t be more at peace
than when i’m with you
and i turn to you
and i whisper
this is my miracle

your hand touching mine
and in that moment when
i feel my heart fill with joy
i cry, inside
i melt for you

from across the room
our eyes meet
i can feel when i start to smile
i’d give anything for you
and i say to myself
that i know
this is my miracle

your hand touches my side
and in that moment i realize
that i can’t be hurt
and i melt, inside
i cry for you

TRIP TO THE SWINGS

i always finish my words smiling
in my head you always smile too
and i’m waiting for our day
and now my hopes are raised

let’s take that trip to the swings
talk to me, tell me whats inside
i wanna know everything that
goes through your head at night

walking out to the streets edge
hold me while no ones looking
tell me that you’re glad i came
and i say that i am glad too

let’s take that trip to the swings
fill me up, with a feeling of bliss
i wanna know everything that
goes through you head at night

as the cold day comes to a close
the sun sets and the sky is nice
you’re trying to keep me warm
and i’m trying to keep you warm

let’s take that trip to the swings
tell me all your hopes and dreams
i wanna know everything that
goes through your head at night

2/15/01

YOUR STYLE©
So you walk down the street
right by my house everyday
shoe laces flying around
an old faded tee with holes
two different dirty socks
pants with duck tape for a belt

so what i see in you I'm not quite sure
you just have some kind of charisma
I'm real attracted to your style
i think the things you think are rad

I saw you coming down the road
So i went outside in my sandals
with my rubber ducky socks
my bad girl tank top
my ripped up old jeans
and my hair a mess

so what i see in you I'm not quite sure
you just have some kind of charisma
I'm real attracted to your style
i think the things you think are rad

You flashed your big smile my way
and walked right on by
but then you came back
you introduced yourself to me
said you liked my style
and that you were attracted to me

so what i see in you i now know
you just have some kind of charisma
I’m real attracted to your style
i think the things you think are rad

i think the things you think are rad


MIST©
The days seem much shorter,
than the one’s i used to live,
will they keep misplacing minutes,
and eventually disappear,
Will i lose you to the falling moments,
of the life i had now past,
Will you forget me in the mist,
and go back on all your promises,

Or will you stay with me,
no matter the situations,
will you love me still,
with unconditional feelings,
will you miss me when i’m not there,
will you touch me every chance you get,
kiss me when you see me still,
will you still need me to live,

The nights are getting longer,
As the day loses sunlight,
It keeps adding on the darkness,
Soon it’ll all be pitch black,
Will i fail to find my way,
in all the darkened shadows,
Will you forget me in the fog and,
won’t remember everything we’ve shared,

or will you stay with me,
no matter the situations,
will you love me still,
with unconditional feelings,
will you miss me when i’m not there,
will you touch me every chance you get,
kiss me when you see me still,
will you still need me to live.
3/3/01

ANNIHILATED©
Why be confident,
and why be popular,
Why look for answers,
when you have so much to offer,
Just be yourself,
No one should say,
that you’re trying to hard,
to make life easier ,
Try not to get caught,
in the web of gossip,
because you never know,
when the rumor will turn,

when your searching,
deep in your soul,
you find the voice,
that says to give up,
But you know,
that when you let go,
everything you’ve felt,
will be annihilated,
from two seconds ago,
So just start crying inside,
it’s alright to feel,
the power of evil,
much more than the real deal.
Kristin M Isphording
2/4/01

TRAGICAL EPISODE©
You left me all alone
by myself all alone
feeling empty in my mind
my eyes felt like falling out

How could you leave me
we were always friends
you confuse me
you refuse me

I can’t have another tragical episode
not if I'm all alone
I don’t need another tragical episode
so I'll forget you forever my foe

I don’t wanna see you
on my step one day
i don’t need to feel you
under my finger nails

I don’t care that you left me
as long as you don’t come back
you reminded me
you blinded me

I can’t have another tragical episode
not if I'm all alone
I don’t need another tragical episode
so I’ll forget you forever my foe
I’ll forget you forever
and ever and ever

Won’t see you ever
Won’t need you ever
You’re a tragical episode
Kristin M Isphording
2/4/01


YOUNG LOVE©
verse 1
you played with my heart
you made me feel special
you told me you loved me
and never would leave
but now your gone
and i’m telling you this

chorus
Young Love it’s time for you to see
when you say goodbye
you lose the one you need but
Young Love i wish you were still here
and you could wipe away all that i fear

verse 2
why did you break my heart
and lie to my face
why can’t you see that
see that you need me
why can’t i have your love
why can’t you hold me still

chorus

verse 3
when you will you realize
i still love you
when will you tell me
you love me too
because i know that you feel
for me what i feel for you
chorus
Kristin Isphording
4/17/00


WHO'S GOTTEN IN YOUR HEAD©
You’ve changed in my mind
You’ve stopped caring
You left the things you loved
all for what ALL FOR WHAT

Who’s gotten in your head
Who’s gotten to your brain
Who’s fucked you up
Who is it...tell me who

I’ll go after him for you
I’ll get him down
I’ll fuck him up for you
all for what ALL FOR WHAT

Who’s gotten in your head
Who’s gotten to your thoughts
Who’s fucked you up
Who is it...tell me who

We’re not getting anywhere
We’re not even talking
We’re just letting go of problems
all for what ALL FOR WHAT

Who’s gotten in your head
Who’s gotten to your brain
Who’s fucked you up
Who is it...tell me who

I’ll get them for you
just tell me who
who’s gotten in your head
and to your brain
who?
kristin isphording
2/4/01


WHAT WAS I THINKIN©
chorus:What was i thinkin
messin around with guys like you
i knew you’d fuck up
fuck up with things you do

I thought you were so perfect
the silence in your eyes
you told me everything through your mouth
never went to hide words inside

Chorus

I don’t know why i felt like that
after our first argument
I knew it wasn’t the last to come
of the fights you and i were to have

chorus

You gave me things of unimportance
to make my heart forget
the hurtful words and terrifying abuse
that you so often possessed

chorus

You used to be so perfect
never would touch me wrong
but then you just exploded
exploded in my arms

chorus
Kristin Ishording
2/4/01

AWKWARD HOURS©
a couple of the most awkward hours
i spent with you

it’s been a long while
since you came to see me
it’s been forever it seems
since you looked my way

i spent some time with you
we talked for a long time
i never could stop smiling
a couple of the most awkward hours
i spent with you

i didn’t know where to look
i couldn’t tell how you felt
i watched what i said but
were you happy to see me

i spent some time with you
we talked for a long time
i never could stop smiling
a couple of the most awkward hours
i spent with you
August 9, 2001

BEING YOUNG©

Aren’t we supposed to have fun
never worry about our problems
live our lives to the fullest
it’ll never be good like this again

so why don’t you get off my back
let me have fun while i still can
i won’t be a high school drop out
just trust me to make my choices

This is the best time i’ll ever have
I’m young and youthful let me be
let me run let me fall just let go
it’ll never be quite like this again

so why don’t you get off my back
let me have fun while i still can
i won’t be a high school drop out
just trust me to make my choices

I have my priorities you have yours
can’t i just hang out with my friends
forget for a minute that you’re old
think of the fun times way back when

why don’t you get off my back
let me have fun while i still can
i won’t be a high school drop out
just trust me to make my choices
-kristin isphording 8/7/01

CHARISMATIC©
The pain just builds up inside
no one understands
and no one believes
all they see is a big house
all they see is a cute face
there’s more to me than that

i don’t give a shit about it
my life is based on a love
a love i haven’t yet found
a love for life and passion
a love i need inside myself

i say it a million times
but you don’t get it
even though you know
the shit i go through
you think it doesn’t matter
cause I've got a big house
and I'm charismatic
August 12, 2001

FORGET TRYING©
i wish i could show you
the mangled torn girl
the girl that's inside me
i keep it all in my head

you’ve never tried once to see
just because i have material things
doesn’t mean i have what i need

this feeling is killing me
and i don’t care about anything
all i wanna do is run away
i don’t even try anymore

you’ve never tried once to see
just because i have material things
doesn’t mean i have what i need

a trip to medication city
i don’t smile as much now
my soul starts to disappear
and i drown in the tears
August 12, 2001

HABITS©
well my daddy smokes
and my mommy yells
but everything is good as hell
they might rub off on me eventually
but I always know they’ll never say

you do what you know
and what you grew up around
bad habits are contagious

Well my sister smokes weed
and my friend has a temper
but i know that they love me
i might become what they are
but I always know they’ll never say

you do what you know
and what you grew up around
bad habits are contagious

Well my brother is whacky
and me i’m emotional
But we’re livin the life
it might be my destiny ‘cause
I always know they’ll never say

....i’m right
August 12, 2001

SOMEONE©

i love to be with you
but even when you're next to me
you're so far out of my reach

someone's holding me back from you
someone i'm commited too
not my lover not my friend
but someone inside of myself

i'd bring you back a star from heaven
if i could only get my hands free
my head is in the clouds
but my hands are tied behind me

someone's holding me back from you
someone i'm commited to
June 1, 2001

SWIRLING ‘ROUND MY MIND©
i thought it was rad when the sky fell down
i did cry when the sun came up the next day
i know I'd make a fine borderline personality
it’s time for another trip to my favorite place
my favorite place

yeah you know
the room with padded walls
with the little red baboons
swirling ‘round my mind
flowing through my nerves

the needle was shoved in and i smiled
i felt the power going through my veins
i saw the smoke fill the air with delight
they strapped me down to this metal bed
oh yeah to the metal bed

yeah you know
on my way to the room
with the little red baboons
swirling ‘round my mind
flowing through my nerves

the trip took longer than expected
the long cold slippery hallway to it
the door has this little thing that opens
they give me food through that thing
through that thing

yeah you know
already in the padded room
with the little red baboons
swirling ‘round my mind
flowing through my nerves
June 1, 2001

SPIT ON ME ©
remember when it started,
it was good in the begining,
I thought of falling for you,
and they warned me not to,
but i took the jump anyway,
and look at where i've landed,
i found myself lonely, alone,
alone, alone, alone

take another look
take another step
turn around
spit on me
look in my eyes
tell me i'm nice
SPIT ON ME

flash back to before the end,
recall the stories we told,
hiding away in the depths of your skin,
search my brain for answers,
finding nothing but fears,
walked to the end of the earth,
to find there’s nothing there,
there’s nothing there

take another look
take another step
turn around
spit on me

look at my face
hold your words
SPIT ON ME
July 4, 2001 kristin isphording