Matt was weary as he drove through the rain...it was late and he contemplated whether he should stop and rest or if he should just drive straight on into the night. He frowned… no he had to keep going… It was dark and the rain was really coming down. He was listening to a soft, sad song on the radio and it seemed fit his mood perfectly - quite and sad... He was driving alone on his way home to Cameron. Matt drove cautiously through the rain as he continued down the highway surrounded by the darkness of the night and the quite that seemed to consume him. He was tired and he still had a long drive ahead of him this night. He didn’t like being alone, he suddenly wished he had agreed to let Jeff accompany him on the long road trip. He was alone which allowed him to much time to think, to much time to grow even more worried… Angela was sick. Really sick. Matt drove for about another 3 hours and stopped at a rest stop. He got out and stretched and then reached into his pocket for his cell phone. He dialed the familiar number and waited. It rang about 4 times and Matt was about to hang up when he heard an incredible… familiar voice say hello. “Angie baby… hey its me… ohh baby I miss you, I miss you sooo much! Are you okay? I just thought I’d call and let you know I’m somewhere outside of Delaware. Did I wake you?” Matt asked quickly relieved to hear her voice. Angela smiled recognizing Matt’s voice instantly. “Hey Matty. Ohh Matt I miss you too! When are you gonna be here?” Angela asked softly. Matt sighed he could tell she was weaker then she had been. She also sounded really tired and he kinda regretted calling her. She needed all the rest she could get, and he had woken her. Now more then ever she needed as much sleep as she could get. Matt sighed looking around as he glanced down at his watch. “Well if I drive straight there I figure not until late tomorrow night or morning. There’s a lot of traffic and its raining here so the roads are slick. I’m going as fast as I can though Angie, I wanna be there with you more then you know.” Matt said softly thinking of her alone at the house, and how he wanted to be there with her more then he ever had before. Angela smiled as she snuggled back down in the big empty bed without him there. She sighed, “I just want you to hold me Matt.” Angela said softly. Matt ached hearing her say that. He grinned rubbing his head. “Your not the only one.” Matt smiled. Angela giggled softly and she sounded more sleepy then she had a moment ago. “Call me in a few hours okay?” She asked quietly. Matt sighed, shaking his head, “I will. I love you Ang.” Matt said softly. Angela snuggled against her pillow wishing he was holding her at that exact second. She smiled, “I love you too Matt.” Angela whispered softly. Matt sighed, “Bye babe.” Matt said running his fingers through his long dark brown hair. “Bye Matt.” Angela said softly hanging up. Matt slid his phone back into his pocket as he leaned against the hood of his car. As if she hadn’t been through complete hell before… between Jack and Ray and everything that had happened to her, now she was really sick! Now he really might risk losing her for real and the reality of the situation hit him suddenly like a ton of bricks. Matt found he was wiping his eye’s with his sleeve unable to hold back the tears any longer. “Dammit!” Matt heard himself mumble as he slammed his fists against the cool wet metal on the hood of the car and closed his eye’s. Why was this happening to her, way did she have to be sick!? Matt opened his eye’s and looked up into the dark night sky. The rain fell from the Heavens hitting him in the face-but he didn’t seem to pay it any notice. It wasn’t fair. “Why her?” Matt asked whispering into the night staring into the dark sky as if waiting for an answer. He felt the tears slip down his face and he took a deep breath feeling like he himself would be sick. “Dear God please don’t take her from me… I need her… I love her so much…. Please just let her be okay… I can’t lose her! She’s my whole world…she’s my everything…….. Don’t take her from me… please… I love her more then… more then is possible! She’s supposed to be my wife and grow old with me! It’s not fair… let me keep her!” Matt whispered as he wiped his face and cried softly into his hands for a long time. Matt finally got back into the car and started again off down the highway. He stared ahead, again having to much time to think. He stared off remembering that day…. *** It had been early November… it was raining….much like it was now… Matt was sitting on the couch in the living room at his house which he now shared with her in Cameron. The flames from the fireplace glowed brightly throwing shadows about the room. He sat back listening to the rain, waiting for her to come home. He was anxious to see Angela after being away from her for 2 weeks, while they were separated from traveling. She had called to tell him she’d be home late and that she had a doctors appointment to go to. Matt heard the front door open and he leaped from the couch and walked down the hall towards the front door, eager to see her and hold her. He stopped leaning in the doorway entering into the front hall and saw Angela leaning against the wall staring off into space. “Angie… babe… you okay? Is everything alright?” Matt asked walking slowly towards her. She didn’t seem to know he was there, or had even heard him until he touched her arm gently. “Ang you okay?” Matt asked softly as she looked up at him, tears falling from her eye’s. “What happened?” Matt asked softly touching her cheek, gently wiping her tears away with his finger tips. He was suddenly afraid that somehow Jack or Ray were back. They were not… Angela was shaking and he frowned scooping her up into his arms and carrying her to the living room. He set her gently down on the couch and sat beside her, smoothing her hair away from her face as she stared into the flames as tears silently fell from her eye’s. “Angie… baby tell me what’s wrong!” Matt insisted whispering as he stared at her concerned. Angela finally looked up and met his eye’s as he smoothed her hair away from her face. She bit her lip gently another tear rolling down her cheek. “I’m sick Matt.” She whispered staring at him. Matt felt his heart beat quicken. “Sick?” Matt repeated staring at her. Angela nodded tears falling from her eye’s. She was strong she could get over something like the flu or something, why was she so upset over being sick, she’d rest for a few days and be fine. Matt thought naively confused. “Remember how I told you I’ve been extra tired lately and I thought it was just because I was getting burned out from all the wrestling and the traveling and I had scheduled an appointment to see the doctor just to see what they had to say?” Angela asked softly as Matt nodded. She sighed as she got up slowly and walked towards the window pulling the curtain aside and staring out into the rain. Matt sat uneasily concerned as silence settled over the room, and the crackling from the fire, and the sound of the rain was all he could hear except for the pounding of his own heart. Matt stared at her as he watched more tears fall down her cheeks. She was his beautiful Angel… he hated seeing her so upset. She would soon someday be his wife, he hated it every time he saw her cry- it killed him. Matt sighed as he got up and walked up behind her. He knew she knew he was there, and he thought she would pull away from him, but as he wrapped his arms around her she snuggled against him, turning to look up at him. Angela sighed staring at him, he was incredible and she loved him so much. She snuggled against him suddenly needing his touch more then she had in a long time. Aching for him to hold her. In his arms she could always seem to find comfort and feel protected. Why couldn’t he protect her from this? Angela stared at him as she wiped the rest of her tears away softly. “I have cancer Matt.” Angela whispered as the tears fell again. Matt was stunned, as he stared at her in horror. “What?” Matt whispered letting her go and returning to sit on the couch. He sat a moment feeling like he was going to collapse or have a heart attack or something. And then was back on his feet staring at her from several feet away. “Angie how is that possible?” Matt asked hearing his voice break as he trailed off and rubbed his forehead. After a moment Angela spoke softly. “I’m really scared Matt.” She whispered as Matt looked back up at her and felt her eye’s on him. His heart broke in two as he stared at her, never before seeing such a scared and sad expression on her usual happy smiling beautiful face. Tears rolled down her face and he groaned as he came to her and wrapped her tight in his arms, as she clung to him, crying against him. Matt smoothed her hair still confused but more concerned about what he could do for her. After a few minutes Angela picked her head up from his shoulder and he wiped a few more tears from her face gently, as he stared at her. She took a breath and sighed, “I wanna live and be with you Matt. I don’t wanna die.” She whispered crying softly as Matt felt tears roll down his face as he touched her cheeks softly with his finger tips. “Your are not gonna die Ang… your gonna live, were gonna get married and have a family, were gonna live happily ever after like were supposed too! I’d never let that happen! Baby you know your stuck with me… no matter what… I’m not goin’ anywhere okay? I‘m not goin‘ anywhere! I’m gonna be right by your side through everything… I love you Angela more you know… Your not gonna die…. I won’t let you! Your not going to die!” Matt whispered as he leaned close to her and kissed her gently feeling her hug him tighter as she kissed him back gently. Matt held her warm in his arms wanting to never let her go. He held her kissing her deeply wishing he was sure of what he had promised. *** Matt wiped tears away from his eye’s as he continued down the highway. The lights from the cars on the other side of the highway were hazey to him, his eye’s were fuzzy and he wiped them quickly. He frowned shaking his head as he reached to turn the radio station. He flipped through several stations and settled on an oldies station. Dolly Patron was playing, she was singing about a lost love or something and he sighed not really listening to it as he continued on down the road. Matt’s mind wandered. Angela was one of the healthiest people he’d ever met. Every time he tried to understand how & why something as awful as this was happening to such a kind & good person he felt angry and confused not able to find an answer. Angela doesn’t deserve to have cancer… no one does, no matter what! Matt’s mind wandered further. The last 2 and a half months had gone by in a blur. Angela had taken time off from wrestling and had started her first sessions of chemo. Matt was busier then ever trying to be with her during it all and still wrestle like she had insisted he continue to do. She refused to allow him to take time off. She told him she didn’t want his career to be ruined over her, knowing how important wrestling was to him. She was what was important to him now, nothing else mattered but her living through this! The last time he’d been home to see her was the week before when the wrestling was in Charlotte taping SmackDown. He went with her the next day to start her second set of chemo sessions. She’d been lucky thus far, she hadn’t lost much of her long brown hair yet. It was scary for him to see her in all the pain she was in, and to know that there was nothing he could do to take it away from her. He’d have given anything to see her pain and suffering end, he’d give his own life if it meant she could live and be happy. He wanted nothing more but for her to get better and marry him. To give her the fairly tale happily ever after dream come true she’d always wanted. She’d grown a lot weaker over the last months and she seemed to forever be tired. But like he had promised, he was doing his best to be with her whenever he was able to do so. She remained strong through it all and he could only continue to pray she’s get passed this whole thing so they could move on together. The morning after he’d left last week he was asleep in his hotel room in NYC. He was hanging out with his friends at the RAW show that night. That night was RAW live in MSG, he was asleep when his cell phone rang. Colleen, Angela’s cousin, who’d come to stay with them for a while after her divorce from Joe, and to be with Angela when he couldn’t called to say that Angela had collapsed and she had called an ambulance to take her to the hospital, and she’d call him when she found out what was wrong. Apparently Angela’s body was refusing the chemo and the cancer was using it to further the disease, spreading rather then shrinking. She was in the hospital for the night and Colleen brought her home in the morning. Angela had insisted on going home against the doctors orders. What was going to happen now…? He didn’t know, he just wanted to get home to her. Naturally Matt wasn’t concentrating on the show and he went to Vince to ask if he could take off and go home to be with her. Considering all the time he’d taken off in the last months Vince was amazingly sympathetic of Angela, especially after all the had happened to her with Jack & Ray. Matt supposed Vince felt a bit to blame that the security hadn’t been enough to protect her and keep them out, after that night, every show had increased security. To Matt’s amazement Vince okay’d it, and told Matt to hurry home to Angela and tell her that the whole of WWE’s prayer’s were with her and he expected her back in the ring as soon as she was well again. Matt was truly grateful of Vince then, and left in a hurry, driving as quickly as he could legally go to be home with her. Matt cursed himself suddenly for not allowing Jeff to come for the long ride, it would have been nice to have someone, especially his brother to talk too… to keep his mind away from thinking so much about the situation. Matt could feel his eye’s growing heavy and he reminded himself that Angela was very sick, and who knew if she would ever be well again, he frowned… while he still had her he wanted to spend every minute there was with her. He shook off the sleep and concentrated on getting home to be with her.
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