Entry 000078; 12.15.01

That's it. I'm weeding all the fuckers out. I've always been afraid to before because...well...if you weed out all the bad friends, you'll probably have no friends left.

Well you know what? I don't care.

Today I spent about an hour or more crying over Davey blowing me off again. Is this what friendship is? Is this all worth it? Keeping shitty friends for fear of having none? I'd rather have none.

From now on, when people fuck me over, I'm dropping them like the sacks of shit they are. Maybe I need them. I'm not too proud to say I can survive completely independant. But I did it once, didn't I? And I survived and I got through.

So, for the time being, I'm going to drop those friends who won't treat me the way I believe friends should treat each other. No more waiting for them to leave of their own accord. Those who treat me with respect, they can stay.

Also, for the time being, I am going to surround myself with a steel shell of apathy. No one can hurt me. I refuse to have any true emotional response to anything anyone does to me. When I find people whom I can trust with my love, I will take off the shell. Till then, fuck you all.