Entry 000083; 12.27.01
Erm. Eh...I..uh...oh um...hrm...hmm...uh..
I uh...hm. Some things...I think, about this personality need to be altered. We'll see. I hope not. I'm really quite fond of her the way she is. It's just this, that is, this not caring about anything, it's harder or easier than it used to be. And it's working too well, well enough to scare myself. But then I wonder- is it really working at all? Or will all this come back to bite me?
Oh another note;
Christmas was bland. I barely even realized it happened. I wasnt' really thinking about it as it approached and didn't think about it as it was happening. I am so very very very very glad to get out of school. I really wish I didn't have to go back. I'd rather be bored. And I HATE being bored.
Drooly came over wednesday night, then friday night houxby came over. Saturday and Sunday Nathan slept with me, which is odd, seeing as how he now has a girl creature. I asked if she would mind and he said no, which everyone would be able to tell is a blatant lie. Funny...cause he said he never lies.
I wanted to visit everyone from print's plus and the happy shiny NS Mall, but it was the day after christmas when I could get there, and the mall was packed with morons, fools, and cheap bastards. So I barely got to say hi, and defintely didn't get to hang out with them. It's a shame, since I miss them. I finished up christmas shopping also that day, becuase I figured hey, what's one more loser in a pack of morons?
I hung out with lychee last night and today. We did all sorts of tom-foolery and whatnot, and we went into boston with amanda and torpe today, to visit muncus.
I came home to worcester to find the kitchen lights on, the shower torn apart, and the place a complete mess. I really hate my landlord. And if he shows up at 6:00 AM tommorro morning to work on that shower, I'm going to rip him a new asshole. Tommorro is Drooly day, and if he interrupts any of it, there will be another reason to rip this guy a new asshole.
After Drooly day, I think on Saturday and Sunday, I'm going to visit Joe in norwell. I have no idea what we're gonna do, but I do know I have a severe pacini's craving that screams to be sated, so that is probably in the agenda somewhere. Sunday night I'm going to take the train to wherever Nathan will pick me up, and we're going to New Hampshire (I'm still not sure why, all I know is that a bunch of his friends are going there and I'm not sticking around in Worcester all alone). If Nathan brings the insipid girl creature, I'm going to get right back on the train tell him to go fuck himself.
Jesus Christ it's cold here. I really wish the downstairs people would come back so we could steal heat from them like usual. Of course, we third-floorer's are too cheap to turn on the heat ourselves, and I certainly am not turning on the heat just for myself since the rest of my roomates have to pay gas bills too.
I can't remember whether I told this before or not, so I'll say it (again?). I had a sleepy attack a bunch of nights ago (...thursday night maybe?) and I woke up the next morning with all of my hair chopped off, and the apartment all clean and orderly. Crazy. I really wish I would film myself when I'm doing stuff like that. I always worry/wonder whatelse I'm up to during those unconscious(?) episodes.
27/60