Entry 000090; 01.23.01

Today was one of those days. Not the kind where you wish you hadn't gotten out of bed; the kind where you wish you hadn't woken up and gained consciousness at all. The kind where you know this even before you wake up, and yet you have to. Because you have to turn that homework in. Because you have to attempt to register for that class that won't work with your schedule. Because you have to eat. Because you have to wash. Because you have to run through the list of the millions of boring mundane things that you are not looking foward to through your head, and not even get a hundreth of that list done. One of those days.

My mind spent the morning jerking my into sleep/just below waking, running over the lists and lists and lists of things I have to do. Call the transfer admissions person. Write that college essay (which, after my 17th birthday, I had promised myselves would never have to do again). Get the recycling bin. Sign up for that class. Go to accounting. Cook food. Eat food. Shower. Get greasy just sitting there. Shower again. Study for the test tommorro. Study for the other test tommorro. Do the homework. Call your friends. Call your mom. Clean, do, work, act, eat, walk, sit, jump.

One of those days where you wake up and look over and sort of wish that the person next to you was someone else, nonexistant, or a figment of your imagination. One of those days where before you even look at yourself in the mirror, you know you are going to look like a pile of grey jello, the kind with the pieces of stakle fruit inside it. You can feel your teeth getting crooked, your skin getting spongey and breaking out, your hair turning into something not quite as attractive as a brillo pad stuck in the garbage disposal. That kind of day.

This part is kind of useless now. Let's assume it approaches one, and try not to think about what kind of depressing implications that has