Entry 000094; 01.27.01

!!!!

I have underpants that are a good 6 or seven years old. Good, old fashioned gramma things that you can pull up to your chin. Starting around fall break, they started to get holes in them. I figured, 'well, ok, they are old. I suppose they have to wear out sooner or later.'

Yet, lately this has been happening more and more. I've attributed it to new pants, maybe they are just killing the hell out of my underpants.

Yet.

Today I found a hole in one of my less-than-ancient danties. This was the kind with colorful butterflies (I have to wear children's underwear cause women's underwear is scary). I noticed that the underwear wasn't just ripped, but that it was MISSING in places. Entire butterflies were gone from the fabric.

Imagine my disgust.

Now, other than a LOT of walking in pants with really tight crotches (none of which my pants have), the only thing that could have created holes like that are scissors. Or acid. Or mice. Since the holes were jagged, and since there wasn't any melted fabric, I deduced it down to the mice option.

OH GOD EW.

This transgression will not go unrevenginated!!!

GODDAMIT! How would they like if it I went into thier stupid little mouse-holes and ate THIER underwear?! Bastards. That's just plain rude. Not to mention the extra bother of having to put my underpants (I really like saying this word. It's a funny word)in mouse-proof containers.

Goddamn. Fucking little perverts.