Entry 000156; 02.11.03

I picked up this magazine on the "FREE TABLE" outside the darkroom today while I was waiting for the women's basketball game to start. It looked like it had a decent amount of recipies (I'm searching everywhere for recipies for Nathan's new diet, if any of you have any, send). So I was flipping through the entire magazine just now, and it's got to be the most disgustingly vile thing I've ever read. Every single page is "candid" pictures of celebrities that I barely recognize becasue I watch TV every five months or so. It's got full lay-outs of pictures of actresses with thier real-life children, with captions saying "OH man she thought acting was hard work! what the hell is wrong with her HAIR!? That baby sure made her fat." And the picture is of a perfectly normal looking woman, if a bit thin and unusually TV-good looking, carrying her kid to the car or something. What the hell. How the hell could it possibly be WRONG for someone to have a kid just because they are famous? Them of course there are the "rate her breasts" pages, which rate the breasts of current celebrities along with " 'Oh wow I wish I had halle Berry's breasts, they are so much more perfect than normal peoples' - Martha Usual, Boring, TN" Um yeah that's great. Have your readers talk about nothing but other women's boobs. Famously beautiful women's boobs. That's sure to boost thier self-esteem. And my favorite so far (actually I only got a fifth of the way through before I decided I coudln't take anymore) is the feature "How to make yourself happy" The tips include : 1. watch the comedy channel, 2. rent a funny movie, 3. Listen to your favorite music, 4. Watch something with Charlie Chaplin in it, 5. Watch 'Friends'.

Yeah those are all GREAT ideas. Nothing makes me feel better than knowing I am a fat fuck who won't get off the couch. How is living life through characters on TV supposed to make anyone feel better about thier shitty, real-life problems? They don't even give any options for books. At least a book might make a fat lady feel like she has some reading skills. The rest of the magazine primarily consisted of pages and pages of pictures of women, along with line-drawing diagrams of the length of thier bangs. I mean, PAGES and PAGES of this. Who's bangs are great, who's bangs are hideous. As far as I could tell, every single one of those haircuts looked exactly the same. The only difference between the "good" ones and the "bad" ones were that the "bad" ones haven't been in any major movie productions in the last year or so.

So anyway, if you ever happen to come across a magazine called "First for women" Burn it. A fat lady with some self-esteem may thank you for it years down the road.

In other news, I attempted to go to that place with all the food on the Clark Campus, which is scary, because of all the Clark people, who are scary. And who do I see but the pickle, in full nasty un-bathed regalia. He was like "ASHIA?" and I was like ::defensive position:: "no" ...::shakes head:: "no i'm not. not me." Then I ran away. The entire confrontation caught me off guard and I wasn't about to think of any excuses about why I was there, other than I take classes there, which I really don't want people like him to know. Yeah I'm smooth.

In angrier news, remmeber that kid named "Greg" from my chinese class? Now I don't know if I've gone over this before, but I REALLY hate the name Greg. I absolutely loathe it. Every Greg I've ever had to deal with has made me want to punch him in the face. It's like the Ayers'sss distaste for red-heads. Actually I don't mind Greg Ayers, but he never speaks so he's on my good list. Anyway, the main point is that this Greg-from-chinese-class is a grade G LOSER and I hate him with all of my heart and part of all of my limbs. Not only does he STILL NOT KNOW HOW TO PRONOUNCE THE GODDAMN VERB "to be," but he has continued to not show up to class, not study, and generally waste my freaking time as he stumbles and stutters his way through the text. But I found out something even more frustratingly WRONG about the entirety of everything. Guess what major he is. JUST GUESS. No, seriously, JUST FREAKING GUESS. Yeah, that's right. He's an asian studies major. FREAKING ASIAN STUDIES. Now, I have no problem with a little waiguo studying Asia and all that, but it just freaking pisses me off that he's studying Asia and he doens't even have the respect for the place to properly learn it's languages. Even if he studied it and DIDN'T learn it's languages, that'd be one thing. But he has continunally half-assed his way through the entire thing, and I, even as a non-asian, and really offended by that. I hate everyone.