An Open Letter to Pat Robertson
Mood:
mischievious
Topic: WARNING: Politics
Ok, i dont know if this will work, but check it out. It has been sent. ...
Dear Mr. Robertson,
Greetings,
I would like to start by saying that I hope that this is actually is Pat Robertson reading this. And I also hope that I receive a response from your prestigious club. Not a pre-written one, though. Anyway, I know a bit about you, Mr. Robertson, and I have a few questions and comments for you to ponder.
Question #1:
What is the 700 in the 700 Club for? Is it the annual membership fee? Number of members allowed? Number of liberals one must make life miserable for to become a member?
I?m sorry, but seriously, I really would like to know. Please keep reading.
Question #2
You ran for President back in 1992. What were your reasons to and why did you drop out so early? Was Pat Buchanan getting the best of you? I?m kidding, I?m sure you guys are great friends.
Question #3
In the recent election, do you believe John Kerry would have made a better President than George W. Bush? How about Ralph Nader? Monica Moorehead? Michael Moore? Someone else?
Question #4
Are you pro-death penalty? I assume ?no? because you are ardently anti-abortion. Are you Pro-War in Iraq?
Comment #1
I heard that you have been criticizing President Bush on the War in Iraq. I must commend you for that. I?m glad to see some people on the Right recognize a corrupt war when they see one. I hope you continue to pressure George W. Bush and show him that ?crazy leftist hypes? are not the only ones who disagree with his war for oil.
Comment #2
In your books, you raise thoughts of conspiracy theories and whatnot in an odd sort of writing. You raise many questions that are very intriguing. I am disappointed, though; you offer no proof what-so-ever in backing up your theories. People can (and have) rebuke you as easy as asking: ?Could it be, that Pat Robertson is paranoid and spiteful towards those who are different from him?? Now, I know that?s not true, but you make yourself an easy target for liberals, sane people, and people who actually know the answers to your questions.
Question #5
Are you homophobic? Or are you just bitter because your high school sweetheart became a lesbian? ?Do you want to talk about it? Its okay, I?m here?
Question #6
Are you a creationist? (God just went ?click?, right?) Anyway, if so, do you know who ?Dr.? Kent Hovind is? If so, do you agree with him and encourage his beliefs and teachings?
Comment #3 (Quote I)
"...There is no such thing as ... separation of state and church ... in the Constitution. It's a lie of the left."
The Separation of Church and State is not a liberal deception, you know it is true. Please do not act like a bigot towards those who are not Christian.
Comment #4 (Quote II)
"Feminism is a socialist, anti-family, political movement that encourages women to leave their husbands, kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism and become lesbians."
This statement is quite hurtful. My mother is a feminist and she has never killed my brothers, me, or anyone else for that matter. She hasn?t practiced witchcraft, attempted to destroy capitalism, or became a lesbian, either. You say hurtful things for no better reasons than ?shock value? and attention for you and your forgotten club.
Comment #5 (Quote III)
"It is the Democratic Congress, the liberal-biased media and the homosexuals who want to destroy all Christians"
There is NO liberal bias in the media. You and your Right-Wing nutcase show are direct proof of that there is a CONSERVATIVE bias in the media. Want more examples? How about Bill O? (phone sex) Reilly, Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, Ann Coulter, and George Will? Also, Democrats and liberals do not want to destroy Christians. Most of them are Christians! The only thing they want to do, regarding Christianity, is keep it out of government and update the beliefs of the Church. Homosexuals don?t want to either. God made them and God LOVES them. I bet He loves them more than he loves you because most homosexuals are just as kind (if not kinder) than heterosexuals. You are just spiteful and hurtful.
Comment #6 (Quote IV)
"I heard Satan say, "Jesus is playing you for a sucker, Robertson."
Did you? Do you meet Satan in Pat Buchanan?s basement every Thursday? Gary Bauer and Ralph Reed stop by too? Anyway, I heard Jesus say, ?Oh. My. Dad! Get that hateful ass (you) off the air! Pronto!? Maybe he was in a bad mood.
Question #7
Have you met the pope? What does he think of you? Did you get to ride in the pope-mobile? Will you be at his funeral? Who is your pick for the next pope? (Yourself, right?)
Comment #7 (Quote V)
"Many of those people involved in Adolf Hitler were Satanists, many were homosexuals - the two things seem to go together"
No they don?t. See? You are just being a hateful ass. How about this one?many people who watch the 700 Club are conservatives, many are also insane ? the two things seem to go together.
Question #8 (Quote VI)
"Communism was the brain-child of German-Jewish intellectuals"
What?s your point? You are just glorifying communism by saying that.
Comment #8 (Quote VII)
"I know one man who was impotent who gave AIDS to his wife and the only thing they did was kiss"
No you don?t. Don?t lie for shock value.
Comment #9 (Quote VIII)
"I know this is painful for the ladies to hear, but if you get married, you have accepted the headship of a man, your husband. Christ is the head of the household and the husband is the head of the wife, and that's the way it is, period."
It?s painful for rational, non-hateful people to hear. Where the Hell do you get off telling everyone that a woman is less than a man? You are proving my theory about you.
My theory is called 700-KKK Theory. It means that I believe that you, your stupid club and your ever stupider Coalition are just a bunch of ?wanna-be? KKK members. My proofs are that you hate liberals, you hate Jews, you hate homosexuals, you hate a Democratic government, and you find women inferior. You don?t seem to like Asians all that much either. Oh, and that lawsuit against your Coalition by all those black women who didn?t like you segregating them and denying them benefits isn?t hurting my theory all that much. You hate a lot for being a Christian. People would think you were a Methodist.
Question #9
Will you ever run for President again? On the ?All white means all Right? ticket? Are you married? Does your wife know that she is married to a sexist homophobe?
Question #10
According to a 1995 poll, 46% of all Americans believe that if Jesus came back today and found you ?representing? him, we?d all be in big trouble.
What do you think of this? This poll doesn?t even include those who think we?d be in a little trouble, some trouble, crazy, or smited by Christ. Also, that was 10 years ago.
Comment #10
So, your son tried to run for governor? Fortunately, the people in Virginia actually have souls and his (your?) loyal voters had a cross-burning to get to. His loss is direct evidence that you and your horrible TV show are losing all the influence that you once had. You are losing you touch to younger, more insane conservatives, like Sean Hannity. It?s time you resigned and admitted to being the fraud that you are.
If you think anyone outside of the Bible Belt bothers to listen to you, check out these websites from the sane world?
I.) demsTV.com
II.) allhatnocattle.com
III.) worldoflogmire.com
IV.) www.angelfire.com/super2/super316/ -- that?s me
V.) http://www.geocities.com/CapitolHill/7027/patrobertson.html -- that?s you
Mr. Robertson, I know this letter has gotten a little aggressive near the end, but all I really want is a letter from you personally, I want to learn who you really are. The truth is that I really don?t know you, but I am interested in learning about you. Please send me a reply and tell me who you are, what you believe in, and some answers to the questions that have challenged you with. Feel free to remark on the comments I made and pose questions or comments to me. I would surely be impressed and much more reluctant to shrug you off as the ?Right-Wing Nut? I say that you are.
God be with you,
Sincerely,
Joseph G. Kay
JayKay Enterprises / Commentator News / SuperSite II: Bloginator
P.S. If you don?t respond, I will assume you don?t mind being outsmarted by a sixteen year old.
