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Chapter 52 Chalee-Siri’s son was growing quickly and Katrina’s questioning of an old decision grew with him. Her Olvecks were reproducing so quickly they seemed to appear out of thin air but they no longer filled the growing empty space in her heart. She had given up her struggle against loving a man who could and would never love her back. She carried a lonely contentment in her knowledge that he at least thought of her kindly. She understood far too well how descendents of Palpatine were viewed and treated by the galaxy at large. She had decided years before to never subject another innocent life to that and had ensured that no matter the temptation, she could never bear a child. Now she wondered at her own regret. She believed herself right in that choice, still, but couldn’t help seeing Chalee-Siri and her son and feel a sharp pain of jealousy. Her discontent and restlessness only grew as time passed. It added a new dimension to her nightmares that twisted her insides far more than her father’s blazing yellow eyes ever could. Sometimes the child was hers alone; sometimes it united a small would-be-family. Always there was an underlying dread that it would not last. It never did. Always she awoke wondering if it truly was only a dream, or if she was somehow witnessing a possible future. Always she was left with conflicting emotions of the temporary joy and the eventual pain, and always she wondered which was the most important of the two. |
