"The Satellite of 'Dite,
the Fanfic of Riffing of Other Fanfics"
By: Jaimielée Rocket and Maelstrom
EMAIL: jaimielee_rocket@hotmail.com
Disclaimer I: To whom this concerns, it belongs to you!
Smut: Uh~ debated
Violence: Hm~ debated
"Episode Eighteen: Team Rocket's Day Off, Untitled Romance and Untitled Bashing
Kasey Has a Blast With Crow,
And Cleo Feels Crow's Pain"
Disclaimer II: Jessica and Cleo belong to me, Kasey belongs to Maelstrom and Angie belongs to She-wolf. Crow is part of MST3K, so he belongs to Best Brains, Inc. "Team Rocket's Day Off" is owned by Chibi-Jessie. The neo-titled "Untitled Romance" is by IceBeam, (followed by some numbers, but I don't remember them. ^_^;;) Neo-titled "Untitled Bashing" is by Cool TR Dude. Oh, and all the bad guys, Rob-tachi, sort of belong to me, the idea of them torturing us. But Professor Prime and so on ARE mine, so stay away!!!!! Rob, I suppose, would belong to himself, but that's confusing for me to figure out so let's just continue.
A Big Thanks: To all of ya! Thanks! You all saw my ad and responded! See how nice some people can be? Kinda funny with Cool TR Dude, he said I could do a 'fic of his, and a week later I still don't have it! I e-mailed him this fact, and he says "Well, I suppose that's what e-mail is for!"
Review Team For Today: Today it will be the ever-tortured Vegeta, Kasey and, lesse . . . Shampoo and the new SoD crew member Crow T. Robot! Vegeta and Shampoo seem real popular, so why not put them in again. I pick on poor Vegeta a lot, don't I? ^_^ bwahahahh!
~*~*~*~*~*~
Kasey was having the time of her life showing Crow around her beloved Satellite of 'Dite, and she skipped, and jumped, and hummed a merry tune, something that she NEVER does. Thus, it frightened her crew much, but she didn't give a damn, she had CROW! First, she showed him Curve A, where all her crew had appeared that one day, a year and so-many months ago. There was a nice plaque there, commemorating the day. It said, "Here is where our pain began, signed, All Of Us." It was a rather touching moment, Kasey explained. Many cried. Crow "couldn't imagine why."
She showed him all seven decks, and everyone' bedrooms in that Curve, then they went onto Curve B, and then they skipped C and went onto D. First, she would show him Room 7, explaining that that was where everyone went to "hang out" as it were. It was the largest room in the whole satellite so EVERYONE could fit in it, along with food stands, stages and play areas, such as the Fast Throw arena, and it was continually getting larger. Plus, it was the entrance to the theater. Crow personally asked NOT to be shown that.
As they entered the room, a couple of characters, Shampoo and Vegeta, in fact, ran up and spoke in urgent tones to the Captain.
"Stupid Mousse forget glasses," Shampoo muttered. "Mousse left, heading for Curve C."
Vegeta shook his head in shame. "The idiot wouldn't believe us when we told him he was heading for it. He thought he was going to his bedroom to find his glasses that he had left at the Counter."
Shampoo explained briefly, "We play Monopoly again."
"Oh," Kasey replied. "Did you manage to play it right?"
"No," they both answered.
"Oh, well, it's the thought that counts." She took Mousse's glasses from Shampoo. "I'll go find someone to help me through Curve C, and I'll give them to him. Which Deck?"
"Mousse on Deck 6," the cat-girl replied.
"All right. Uhhhh . . ." she glanced at Crow, who had been standing silently by her side, staring lewdly at Shampoo. "Crow." He didn't say anything. "Crow!" She shoved him.
"Wha-what!" he shook his head, regarding the redhead for a moment. "What is it?"
"I have to attend to an emergency, so, uh . . ." she glanced at Shampoo and Vegeta. "Vegeta, show Crow around. I've shown him everything but the garden and Curve C."
The Saiyjin smiled grimly. "I'd be glad to." Crow gulped, he didn't like that look on the man's face. "You want me to show him Curve C?"
He asked that as Kasey was exiting the room, and she shouted back, "I'd rather you not!" The door shut.
"Does that mean I can if I want?" he asked Shampoo. She shrugged.
He turned his smirking visage back to Crow, who was now purely frightened. "Wonderful, I'll show you the garden then . . ." he said in a spooky voice, "CURVE C . . ."
"Wha-what's in Curve C?" Crow asked, shaking, his body clanking loudly.
"You'll see . . . Gwahahahahahah!"
Later that afternoon, Kasey and Ash the Demon Hunter had successfully reached Mousse before he was torn apart by youma and Deadites, and returned him his glasses, then showed him the way back to his room in Curve B. When she returned back to Room 7, a couple of hours after she had left Crow with Vegeta, and they weren't there, so she took a nap in Jessica's Captain Chair.
She was now awake, and drawing in her notebook, when she heard a familiar clanking sound approaching her. She looked up and saw Crow T. Robot dashing over to her. He stopped and screamed, "Dear Lord have MERCY! Save me!"
Kasey gave a start and scratched her head. "Hiya, Crow, what's the matter?"
He grabbed her flannel shirt and yanked her back and forth. "They're trying to KILL me!"
"Who?"
"Everyone!"
"How?"
"They're throwing a LIVE VOLTORB at me!" He stopped shaking the red head as she began to laugh. "What's so funny!"
"It's a game!"
"Wha now?"
"It's called Fast Throw! You have to throw the Voltorb fast before it explodes on you!"
He released her shirt and he felt like he was about to faint. "And I thought things at the SoL were weird . . ."
Kasey was about to comfort him, (even though she still felt like laughing at his expense), when an annoying beeping sound began.
"Now what?" Crow whined.
"Rob's calling," she answered. "Camharpy, answer it."
"THE Rob? As in Robert Tapert? Creator of 'Xena'?"
"Yeah, but it isn't as grand as you expect."
"I don't care, I'm meeting the man of one of THE best TV shows out there!" He viewed the Comm Port screen, stars in his eyes.
Kasey sighed and shrugged. "Whatever. Hello, Robu-san!" she called as the screen flickered alive.
Crow's first sight of the "magnificent" Mister Robert Tapert was him, dirty, mud caked in his used-to-be-extremely-orange hair, torn clothes, and an insane grin on his face.
That was when Crow finally fainted.
Kasey smiled and crossed her arms, as Cleo wandered over to the robot and sniffed him up and down. "Why, Robu-san, you're looking rather pleasant today. Did you find out we have CROW the ROBOT from Mystery Science Theater 3000 with us? Hmm?"
His face fell. "What? I never sent him!"
"No, he fell into a portal and into our dimension. And he brought word from Jessica! Isn't that wonderful!"
Rob placed a finger to his chin and thought this over. "Hmmm . . . it could help ratings on my website if HE goes into the theater . . ." Leave it to Rob to turn a good thing to evil. Everyone in Room 7 sighed.
"Well, what WERE you so happy for?" Vegeta asked, leaning on the bleachers around the Fast Throw arena. (The game had stopped so the crew could listen to the evil TV producer.)
The grin returned to his face and he stepped back, allowing the Comm Port a wider view of where he was. It was a nicely decorated room with beige walls and gold colored fixtures on the walls. Behind him was a large bed, covered in beautiful comforters, and his bag of machines laid on the chest at the foot of it. "I'm in the Maiden Hotel! I'm at the festival! I finally made it to where I was going! In time, too!" He rubbed his hands together. "The festival just started, in a week, the ghost of Maiden's Peak will appear." He began to cackle. "And she will be mine!"
Ash, sitting at a food stand with Misty, whispered, "He DOES know it's a Gastly, right?"
"I hope so," she answered, "or we're being held captive by a madman."
"I always thought we were beforehand."
"That's besides the point, Ash."
"Today, I have THREE, count 'em, THREE fanfics for you to celebrate this joyous occasion."
"Huzzah," everyone retorted together. (They have had lots of practice doing that.)
"First is 'Team Rocket's day off' by Chibi-Jessie, and untitled Team Rocket romance by IceBeam, and an untitled bashing by CoolTRDude. Enjoy!" Before he was able to shut off the Comm Port, Persian ran into the room, meowing something with extreme urgency. Rob gasped and shouted, "Prime! Don't use ALL the bubble bath, you stupid monkey! I need some, too!" --click off--
"Oh, what fun!" Kasey cried, her voice filled with excessive happiness in her voice. "I'll be able to show my stuff to dear Crow, now! When he sees how wonderfully I riff, he will be instantly taken by me!"
Vegeta, rolling his eyes, strolled over to the sunny Captain. "He totally will. God knows I have . . ."
She reached over and pinched the prince's cheek. "Oh, Vegeta-sama," she began cutely, "just for that sarcastic remark of yours, you get the honor of showing off your riffing style to Crow when he awakens, in the theater."
Vegeta's eyes widened. "Wahnow?"
There was a derisive laugh at Vegeta's expense, and Kasey faced the source of said laugh, and she declared, "Oh, Shampoo! Your well-liked with the readers, why don't you join us as well?"
The Chinese Amazon's face fell. "What you say?"
The fanfic sign began to go off and Kasey lifted the unconscious Crow off the floor. "You heard me, get in the theater, NOW!"
~*~*~*~*~*~
(all enter, Vegeta sits in the fourth seat out, Kasey sets Crow down next to him, she seats by him, and Shampoo in the first seat.)
VEGETA: (angrily) Ohhh, I can't BELIEVE you did this, Kasey!
KASEY: Well, you were mean, and you took Crow to Curve C when I specifically told you not to!
VEGETA: (meekly) How'd you know that?
KASEY: I'm the CAPTAIN. You don't think I get told things?
VEGETA: I thought everyone hated you.
KASEY: Don't push it, monkey-man.
CROW: (starts awake) Mike! Mike! (sobs) Oh, I had the most awful nightmare about a redhead and Vegeta--
VEGETA: Hello, there.
CROW: Wahk!!! (scoots back in seat and hits Kasey) Oh no! Dear Lord, change seats with me!
(confused, Kasey switches seats with Crow)
CROW: Ahhhh . . . (leans against Shampoo's arm) How're you doing?
SHAMPOO: (silence)
>Team Rocket's day off!!^__^
VEGETA: Team Rocket's day off started out fine enough, until a giant ASCII art face attacked!
>> By: me, Chibi-Jessie~
KASEY: Why, Chibi-Jessie doesn't sound confident that her name IS Chibi-Jessie.
SHAMPOO: (author) Should me say me Chibi-Jessie? But real name is Kerry Smith!
CROW: Some people just can't grasp it.
>> [yep, I decided to actually write something. It's a cute (but short) story about *our* >heroes having a day off! enjoy^-^]
VEGETA: Giant ASCII art faces attacking seems fun enough to me!
KASEY: Hey, remember what happened last time when you wanted a violent 'fic!
VEGETA: It wasn't THAT bad.
KASEY: You CRIED, for God's sake!
CROW: Hah!
VEGETA: Shut up.
>> ********************************************************************
SHAMPOO: Constellation "Stick."
> Jessie opened her eyes slowly, yawning and stretching. The noisy three-headed pokemon >Dodrio woke her up instantly.
KASEY: So she picked up her chakram and loped its heads off.
CROW: Hah! Been There, Done That!
KASEY: Exxxxactly.
>She rolled over to
> glance at her partner.
>> ...James...
VEGETA: (Jessie) Gawd, how drunk WAS I?
>> Jessie thought of how long she had known him. Since the Bicycle Gang and Pokemon Tech. >She had always had a crush on him since then.
SHAMPOO: Failures bring people close together.
KASEY: Sigh~ I got an F. How romantic. . . .
> (What girl wouldn't with those emerald green eyes and the blue-lavender hair of his?)
VEGETA: I'll take the emeralds!
CROW: I could use a blue wig!
>They were the bestest of friends and told each other
> everything. But now..Jessie felt like she wanted to be more than "best friends."
KASEY: She wanted him to become a "companion."
>> She didn't realize she had been blushing until James questioned, "Why is your face red, >Jessie?"
>> Jessie looked over at her now awake partner. (How long has he been staring at me?) >Jessie wondered.
SHAMPOO: Since you stare at him.
VEGETA: He was probably getting a bit disturbed.
>> "Uh...none of your buisiness, James!", Jessie yelled while giving James a small whack with her >fan. "And, I'm hungry, so we better eat breakfast
>before we have to go try to capture that pikachu again!", Jessie snapped. Every day lately that's >all they had been trying to do, but always failed
> miserably before "blasting off" afterwards. And it was all the twerp, Ash's fault.
CROW: (James) Don't worry, Jessie! Today I have the PERFECT plan. We'll . . . DIG A HOLE!
KASEY: (Jessie) And I wanna be more than friends WHY?
> James rubbed his head where Jessie had whacked him. "Ummm..Jess, don't you remember >today's our day off?", James asked, half smiling, half
> in pain.
SHAMPOO: Yuck, James a masochist.
VEGETA: Well, then Jessie hitting him is a GOOD thing.
CROW: She's turning him on, and she doesn't know it.
KASEY: Okay, that's enough of that.
>> Jessie's blue eyes widened. She hugged james gleefully. "Yes! Finally we don't have to work!", >Jessie exclaimed. Then, Meowth got up.
SHAMPOO: (Meowth) Please, no touch moments till Meowth get coffee.
>> "MEOWTH! What are you two talking so loudly for? I *WAS* trying to sleep you know!", >Meowth screamed loudly. James sighed. "We were
> just really happy that today's our day off!" Meowth grinned a sly cat-like grin. "Was that >all?" James blushed while stammering
VEGETA: (James) If you were implying that I enjoy the feel of Jessie hugging me, then no, that was NOT all.
> "welll...better...make breakfast! heheheh!" James walked over to the small kitchen area in the >abandoned house they were staying in.
CROW: (James) I'm just going to stick my head in this oven, I hope nobody minds.
>Jessie sat
> down at the table with Meowth close behind.
>> "Then what should we do today? Relax? Go somewhere?" Jessie wondered.
KASEY: Do you want to go to Mars with a dead guy and a sandwich?
>Meowth grinned, "We could go to the carnival up town! We might
> be able to snatch a pokemon or two..." Jessie glared and evil glare at him. "Or we could just >go for fun." Meowth nervously finished.
SHAMPOO: (Meowth) Eat cotton candy and apples, ride tea cups till we puke. Fun.
>> "That's a wonderfull idea! Isn't it, James?", Jessie questioned. James walked over to the table >and set down plates of pancakes and eggs.
VEGETA: Boy, he made breakfast quick.
CROW: (James) Hey, look what I found under the fridge!
>"Ya, It
> should be fun as long as no magikarp are being sold!", James decided, remembering the S.S. Anne.
KASEY: (James) I don't know if I was smart enough to learn from that experience!
>Jessie and Meowth just laughed.
SHAMPOO: (Jessie and Meowth) You dare buy another Magikarp, we be force to rip face off you.
>> After a wonderfull breakfast (and James pigging-out on the eggs)
VEGETA: (James) Look, Meowth! Togepi! I'm eating TOGEPI!
CROW: (Meowth) Sob!
>^__^
CROW: Ribbit . . .
>Jessie, James, and Meowth set off for the carnival.
>> Jessie was wearing a short skirt and a cute tank top.
KASEY: (Jessie) Today I'm pretending to be Gabrielle! Lalalala--I'm pure and good! Ladeeda!
>She had decided to leave her hair down and flowing. James thought she looked goregous,
>as always, while looking over her.
SHAMPOO: And she no smell like hair spray today.
>Jessie, on the other hand, thought James looked great in a nice shirt and some khakis. They held >each others
> hand while walking to the carnival.
VEGETA: They're not being romantic, it's just a precaution Jessie takes with James so he won't get lost.
CROW: She should buy one of those leashes for children and use it on James.
>>When the trio arrived at the carnival, James' kid side took over. "OOh! Cotton candy! Can I get >some Jess?", he asked with pleading eyes.
KASEY: (James) It's so SWEEEEEET!
>Jessie
> sighed, "Sure James." "Let's see..what ride should we go on first?", Meowth wondered. "The >Ferris Wheel?" James suggested. "The Ring of
> Fire?" Jessie suggested.
SHAMPOO: (Jessie) It ride where you pretend to be dog, and you jump through flaming hoop!
VEGETA: Now THAT'S a lawsuit waiting to happen.
>"The Haunted House?!", Meowth laughed. Jessie and James looked at Meowth. "What? Why go >on such a stupid,
> non-scary ride???!!!", they yelled together. Meowth grinned, "You may say that now, but wait >until you go in there! You two will be babies!" "I
> bet we wont, Meowth! Just to prove you wrong, we'll go on it!", Jessie challenged.
>> Sometime later, Jessie, James, and Meowth were getting seated on the moving seat to go into >the "Haunted House." It started to move.
CROW: That's what I assumed from the phrase "moving seat."
KASEY: And already James has wet himself from fear.
>Soon,
> the surroundings got darkier and spookier.
SHAMPOO: Hey, that no proper grammar!
VEGETA: YOU'RE one to talk, Shampoo.
SHAMPOO: Quiet, monkey-man!
>Jessie laughed confidently, "See, Meowth, we're not scared of the dark!" Then a (fake) >dead-looking
> Cubone popped out of nowhere cackling, "cuuuu...BONE!" (you will....PAY!) Jessie screamed >and grabbed on to James.
CROW: (James, high-pitched) Jessie! Not there!
>Meowth snickered,
> "Wait, there's more, you know!" Still in Jessie's arms, James felt something brush against him. >He turned to look, and saw a skeleton.
> "AAAAAHHHHHHHHH!", James screamed.
KASEY: (James) Femurs SCARE ME!!!!
>> After many pranks in the dark and much screaming,
SHAMPOO: And much arguing and gnashing of teeth . . .
>the moving seat stopped. Jessie, James, and Meowth got out. "See! I told you you would
>be chickens!", Meowth proclaimed. "SHUT UP YOU MANGY FURBALL!!!", Jessie yelled, >kicking him up to the sky.
VEGETA: (makes sound of Meowth crashing into something, and the sound of a crashing airplane)
>James wondered, "What
> now, Jess?" "Wanna play some games for prizes?", Jessie asked. James nodded.
>> James won Jessie lots of cute stuffed-Pokemon prizes.
CROW: (James) Hey, look Jessie! I won a live Magikarp in a bag!
>They were just walking around, talking. "I wonder if Meowth will ever come down?",
> James thought. Jessie nodded, "I wonder."
KASEY: He's probably between the moon and New York City by now.
OTHERS: --snicker--
>> After tons of fun, scary, and just plain dumb rides,
SHAMPOO: (James) But Jessie, me like choochoo train ride!
>Jessie and James decided to go.
VEGETA: Especially after Jessie nearly had a heart attack on the roller coaster for little children.
> But, Just before they walked off, Meowth fell from the sky.
> "Meowth! That's right! Oh - ya, you weren't saying the motto!!", laughed Meowth.
ALL: (Team Rocket) Hahahahahaha!
CROW: (Jessie) Things couldn't be more pleasant!
>> Later that night, Jessie and James were talking. "I had so much fun today!", James exclaimed. >Jessie looked at James, "Me too. The Haunted
> House was scary, but I liked it." James blushed. Jessie all the sudden looked nervous. >"Ummm..James. We've been friends...no best friends
> since we were young..and.." James studied Jessie. (Uh-oh, this is serious), James thought. >"And..I'd like to be more than friends.", Jessie
> finished.
SHAMPOO: (Jessie) Oh, wait, me say that wrong. Me would like to be LESS than friends.
>James looked into Jessie's beautiful sapphire blue eyes and took her into a passionate embrace.
VEGETA: (James) Kissing's only for when we're married!
>"Oh Jessie! I was so nervous! I
> thought you didn't want to be anything more, so I didn't ask!" Jessie let out her breath. "So you >want to be more than friends, James?" She
>hugged on to him tighter.
CROW: (Jessie) If I can keep him in this position for just a few more seconds, I'll have his soul! Gwahahahahah!
KASEY: (James) Uh, Jessie, you said that out loud.
CROW: (Jessie) Oh, poopie.
>"Of course, Jess.", James smiled while kissing her head softly. "Yes!", Jessie exclaimed. Then, >they kissed each other
> passionatly on the lips. Jessie murmured, "Prepare for trouble..."
SHAMPOO: PASSIONATE trouble.
VEGETA: They can also have some PASSION fruit.
CROW: Then they can do some PASSIONATE TV watching later on.
> [finish]
>> ~Yes, I know it's stupid, but it's the first time I've written a pokemon fiction. Please >e-mail me comments!
KASEY: Ohhhhhh, now I feel so guilty. I hope we don't ruin her fanfic writing career!
VEGETA: Kasey, we're four fictional characters bantering at fanfiction . . . I think WE'RE the ones endangering our careers.
KASEY: I'm never going to be a respected artist, am I?
VEGETA: More than likely not.
KASEY: Sigh~ I'm going to kill myself when this is over, okay?
>> (back to main)
SHAMPOO: Huh? Oh, forget it.
>>>>-------------------------------------------------------
CROW: That hasta be the longest diving board I've EVER seen.
VEGETA: It's for extra bounce, TRUST us.
>James is the sweetest guy I know.
KASEY: (Jessie) He's SWEEEEEEET!
OTHERS: Ouch!
SHAMPOO: Shampoo's ears!
CROW: Cut that out!
KASEY: (smiling) Sorry.
>He's the only guy I
>know.
SHAMPOO: (Jessie) Well, he only femmy guy me know.
>He knew that I wanted to go see Shania Twain's
>concert,
ALL: --snicker--
VEGETA: Yeah, she's very popular on Pokémon Island, I must say.
CROW: And she'll sing her number one hit, "Man, I Feel Like a Goldeen."
>so he camped out for two days just to get us
>three front row tickets. It had been a great concert
>so far, she even sang James' favorite song, That Don't
>Impress Me Much.
KASEY: Meowth likes him a lot, too, but Jessie doesn't like to think about it.
>James: Hey Jessie she's about to sing the last song.
>Shaina:
SHAMPOO: (Shania Twain) . . . Wait, where AM I?!
>*singing* When I first saw you, I saw love.
>And the first time you touched me, I felt love. And
>after all this time, you're still the one I love.
>Mmmm. Yeah. Looks like we made it, look how far we've
>come up baby. We mighta took the wrong way, we knew
>we'd get there someday.
VEGETA: That's a sexual metaphor as any _I_ heard.
>They said, I bet , they'll
>never make it. But just look at us holdin on. We're
>still together, still goin strong. You're still the
>one. You're still the one I run to, the one I belong
>to. You're still the one I want for right. You're
>still the one. You're still the that I love, the only
>one I dream of. You're still the one that I kiss
>goodnight.
CROW: (Shania Twain) But I don't like having to read bedtime stories to you every night.
>Ain't nothin better, we beet the odds
>together. I'm glad we didn't listen, look at what we
>would be missin. They said, I bet , they'll never make
>it. But just look at us holdin on.
KASEY: (James, psychotic) Do you HEAR that, Jessie? She's singing to ME, Jessie. To MEEEEEEEEE!
>Later I learned that Mewoth heard me and James singing
>the song along with Shania.
SHAMPOO: (Meowth) Meowth sitting next to you! Meowth's ears were BLEEDING!
>I figured we would do
>something like. But I didn't think that we would, or
>that Meowth would realize that we were singing to each
>other. When I heard the song I realized that I had
>loved James the entire time I had known him.
>Shania: *singing* We're still together, still goin
>strong.
VEGETA: (Shania Twain) Even after being electrocuted all 253 times!
>You're still the one. You're still the one I
>run to, the one I belong to. You're still the one I
>want for right. You're still the one. You're still the
>that I love, the only one I dream of. You're still the
>one that I kiss goodnight. You're still the one. Yeah!
>Still the one.
CROW: The scary thing is that this song was written by a STALKER.
> You're still the one I run to, the one
>I belong to. You're still the one I want for right.
>Oh! Still the one. You're still the that I love, the
>only one I dream of. You're still the one that I kiss
>goodnight. I'm still glad we made it, look how far
>we've come my baby.
>It was about fifteen minutes after the concert was
>over.
KASEY: (Jessie) James had run off back stage to meet Shania, and I was stuck with Meowth who wanted me to buy twenty Shania Twain refrigerator magnets for him.
>That stupid furball Mewoth had taken the
>balloon, and left me and James to walk back to or HQ.
>James: So that was a great concert wasn't it?
>Me: Yeah it was pretty good.
>James: I started to sing towards the end.
>Me: Yeah so did I.
>That was it I was going to tell James how I really
>felt.
SHAMPOO: (Jessie) But then he say:
VEGETA: (James) Jessie, I really love Shania. We're going to get married someday!
SHAMPOO: (Jessie) That when me realize how dumb James is.
>Me: James.
>James: Wait. I want to tell you something. That song,
>Still The One, it got me thinking about how that kinda
>reminds me of us.
>Me: Yeah so?
>James: What I'm trying to say is that, Jessie I love
>you.
>What!? This isn't happening.
>James: What were you going to say?
CROW: (James) Yup, I love you. Now, let's move on.
>I looked at him. Looked at the James I had known for
>seven years. The James that just told me he loved me.
>The James that I loved. I smiled.
>Me: The same thing.
>James: Really?
KASEY: (Jessie) Wait, you DID say that you loved the Packers, right?
>Well, he started to say that, but stopped when I
>leaned forward and kissed him.
VEGETA: So, he said it in her MOUTH. That's what she's saying.
SHAMPOO: (James) Uh, Jessie, it hard talking with YOUR tongue in MY mouth.
>James: Um.
>Me: Don't say anything.
>James: Okay.
>Me: Come on. We still have a mile to go before we get
>back to headquarters.
CROW: (James) We don't need a bed! We can do it RIGHT HERE.
KASEY: Crow . . .
CROW: What? YOU'VE probably said worse than that before!
KASEY: Yes, and I am ashamed for it.
CROW: You so are not.
KASEY: So what if I'm not?
>>The End
>>>>__________________________________________________
>Do You Yahoo!?
VEGETA: Not in public, at least.
OTHERS: EWWW!
>Bid and sell for free at http://auctions.yahoo.com
CROW: Ah, that's swell.
KASEY: (ad) Get screwed over, it's fun!
VEGETA: Okay, cool, just one more to go, and it's the bashing one.
SHAMPOO: It only page long!
VEGETA: Ooo, how pleasant!
>>>> As our story begins the three idiots known as Ash, Misty and Brock were walking in the forest
KASEY: Well, hey, this is interesting already.
> " We're lost you stupid idiot!!!!" Said misty.
CROW: And she said it quite calmly, too.
> " Its not my fault!!" whined Ash. " you're the one who said to take this path."
> " No i'm not!!! There isn't even a path here!!!" Yelled misty
> " Stop fighting you ignaramuses!! Chill Chill!!" Said Brock.
VEGETA: (stressed) Brock's . . . freaking . . . OUT!
>Then he took out a took out a
>hot branding iron and hit them over the head with it.
ALL: Oh!
SHAMPOO: (Brock) Now hold still so can mark you as MINE.
OTHERS: Oh~
> " Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!! Screamed misty as her hair caught on fire.
ALL: (lol)
KASEY: Oh my God! I have a feeling we're going to be so dumb struck that we won't be able to riff that much . . .
>She ran around ten times
CROW: And she made sure she ran exactly ten times.
VEGETA: It's some kind of ritual, like how some dogs will turn three times before lying down.
>than she stuck her hed in a toilet. "ahh that feels good" Said Misty.
SHAMPOO: No! Drunk recently puke in there!
KASEY: Oh, yuck, she had better pray to God that that is NOT a public toilet.
> Clonk!! when the branding iron hit Ash on the head it made a hollow clonk noise do you know
>why? Because his head is empty!!!
ALL: (cheers and applause)
> " What was that for!!??!" yelled misty and Ash. than they started fighting which made a cloud
>of smoke like in a cartoon.
CROW: There's never a drought in cartoon land!
> Than out of nowhere come TEAM ROCKET!!!!!!!!
VEGETA: (Ash) Oh no! It's Team Rocket!
KASEY: (Misty) Ash, you dummy, THAT'S Team Rocket!
SHAMPOO: (Brock) Guys, it Team Rocket!
> " Prepare for trouble" Said Jesse.
> " And make it double" said James.
CROW: (James) Hey, why does Jessie get a capital "s" on her "said" and _I_ don't!
> " To pertect the world from devastion" Said Jesse.
> " To unite all people within our nation" Said James.
> " To denounce the evils of truth and love" Said jesse.
> " To extend our reach to the stars above" Said James.
> " Jesse!" Said Jesse.*DUH*
> " James!" Said James.*DUH*
SHAMPOO: Author went dumb for moment, there.
> " Team Rocket blasts off at the speed of light!!!" Said Jesse
> " Surrender now or prepare to fight!!!" Said James.
> " Meowth that's right!!!" Said Meowth.
KASEY: You know what, that is the first time I have ever read the motto in a fanfic with "said Jessie" and "said James" at the end of each phrase.
> " Hand us over your Pikachu!" Said James.
> " Never!! Pikachu go!!" Yelled Ash.
> " Pika-chu!!!! yelled Pikachu than Pikachu ran to Ash and bit his leg.
VEGETA: Hahhah! Well, apparently Pikachu finally became SICK of Ash and his prevailing idiocy.
> " AHHHH!! Pikachu what are you doing!!" Yells Ash than he starts shaking his leg to get >Pikachuoff.
> " Ha Ha Ha!! looks like your Pikachu didn't get his rabies shot!!" Said James.
CROW: I think Pikachu should be more concerned about catching some sort of disease from ASH then the other way around.
(a long pause)
KASEY: Wha? Was that ALL?
SHAMPOO: It page long, like Shampoo said.
VEGETA: (snickering) Whoah, that was . . . fun.
CROW: Two romantic stories, then one where Misty dunks her head in a john.
KASEY: It's all in good fun! Let's go.
(all exeunt)
~*~*~*~*~*~
"Oh, James!" Jessie squealed, sitting down with him in an auditorium seat. "You're so sweet! Taking me to this pseudo-Shania Twain concert!" She sighed and clasped her hands to her face, stars in her eyes. "It's almost as if she were here!"
James smiled widely, "Of course, anything for you, Jessie! You look nice."
She smiled back. She was wearing a casual black dress with her boots, and since it was a special occasion, she was allowed to put her hair up in the "wind-blown" fashion. (Ever since Kasey ordered her to put her hair in a ponytail, much hair spray reserves were saved.) "Shh! It's starting!"
People filed into the seats around them, and in the front row, Kasey shuffled in, sitting down next to Shampoo and Vegeta, (who had organized this little concert), and Crow right behind her. She was wearing a nice black blouse with a black tie and jeans, and the robot had a bowtie around his neck. The redhead wasn't looking too well, and she had her hands clapped over her mouth, as she held back gags.
Crow hesitantly patted her on the shoulder. "It's all right, Diablo, you didn't know that Rob was in the--" he paused, as if sickened as well-- "BATHTUB when you called him."
Kasey just moaned and lowered her head between her knees. Lowly, she muttered, "I wish now that Prime hadn't used all of the bubble bath. The bubbles woulda hidden a FEW things."
She quit feeling sorry for herself, even though she had good reason to, when the Magic Voice of the SoD announced, "The Satellite of 'Dite is proud to present a Shania Twain impersonator! In honor of the fanfic!"
The audience all began to cheer and applaud. Lights flashed on, glaring down on the stage in yellows and blues and whites. Music began to play, (from a real band or a stereo no one could tell), and a silhouetted person stepped out from back stage, producing more cheers from the audience. A white light flashed onto her, revealing the person.
Kasey stuck out her tongue. "The hell? MISTY was the only decent person to impersonate Shania Twain?"
"Well," Crow began, musing over this. "You have to admit, with those highlights in her hair, and that tiger-striped revealing outfit, she DOES sorta look like Shania."
Kasey shrugged and just sat back and listened as Misty began to sing, "You're the Only One."
Several people, just because they wanted to be cliché, pulled out lighters and began to wave them back and forth. One of those people just happened to be sitting just behind Jessie. A very STUPID place to do so.
Kasey heard a roaring "foosh!" and she glanced behind her as there was a loud, high-pitched shriek of terror and pain. "Hey, wow! I didn't know Jessie was a pyrotechnician, much less part of the show!" The poor Team Rocket member was out in the aisle, running in circles, her head on fire. The Captain smiled pleasantly, "Gee, that's swell."
"Huh," Crow replied dully, watching the frantic woman. "She looks like she's in pain, but that's just me."
They turned back to watch Misty a.k.a. Shania Twain, with the sound of crackling fire behind them. As Crow was just beginning to really enjoy the show, a cup of pop and some gummy bears spilled on him. "Hey!!" he exclaimed angrily, shaking some of the drink off of his head. He hated aisle seats. "Watch it, jackass! What, you stupid or some--"
But he fell silent as he saw the person who had accidentally spilled their snacks on him. It was a young woman, with long pink hair and yellowish, shining eyes, wearing a cute pink jumper. She didn't have much of a body, she was lanky and almost flat-chested, but she was remarkably comely. She held her hands over her mouth in worry, and she cried, "Oh, sir, I'm so sorry! I tripped and-- oh, I didn't mean to!" She bowed deeply and begged, "Please, forgive me!"
Crow, turning on his "charm," answered in a suave voice, "Oh, don't worry about it, babe. Say, what's your name, darling?"
She straightened and was about to respond, when a young man came up behind her and took hold of her arm. He had wild black hair, wore glasses, and he was lanky as well. He told her something in Japanese, much to the confusion of Crow. The woman whined, "Buroniitaa!" before continuing on in that language, her voice suddenly high-pitched and squeaky. He answered back, and Crow wished he could understand what was being said. As if on his whim, words--ENGLISH words--appeared, running below the man. They were translating what he was saying!
"C'mon," he was saying, "let's get to our seats before someone takes them! We're late." He turned to the robot and bowed slightly, "Please forgive my sister." Crow jumped, startled. Now he was speaking in English! "She's kind of clumsy." He turned to the pink haired woman, and they walked off.
Feeling as if he were in a dream, Crow tapped Kasey on the shoulder and asked, "Who was THAT?"
"Huh?" The redhead turned and saw the two humans walking away. "Those guys? The man's Karigari Hiroshi, an inventor, makes great robots. And the girl was Marie, the robot. We call her Marie-chan most of the time so she isn't confused with the human Marie. She's his creation-sister-girlfriend type person. They were recently dubbed, and they're still trying to get used to it. But don't talk to the English speaking TANAKA. He says gross things. . . . Why, may I ask?"
Crow sighed and replied quietly, "I think I'm in LOVE!"
The End
KASEY: In love? That's nice . . . . . . WHA-AT!?
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You know what I've noticed? James squeals . . . A LOT. "It was my favorite time of the year. WHOOOO!" It's . . . freaky.
Well, anyway, Maelstrom came up with the ending host segment, but I came up with the part with Crow meeting Marie-chan. I love Marie and Karigari. ^_^ They were recently dubbed, and it was fairly good, but for some reason Marie swore more, I don't think Hibiki said the English equivalent of "kuso," and Tanaka said really gross things! Like, "If (human) Marie won't RIDE THE WEASEL with me, than Hiroshi doesn't stand a chance." Me 'n' She-wolf screamed when we heard that. That . . . was not said in the subtitles for the Japanese. (It just makes me sick to think about it . . .) And I wish they had kept "Karigari" for his calling name rather than reverting to "Horoshi." Karigari sounds much neater. And I wonder, is "buroniitaa" how you spell what Marie-chan calls Karigari? Well, it is now! (It sounds like the English "Brother" said in Japanese lettering . . . if you know Japanese, you'll know what I mean.)
So, is it possible that Kasey is jealous of a robot? Then wouldn't that mean she's in love with a robot? I don't think she'd sink that low . . . but we'll see! (heeheehee, I have too much fun with this.)
Oh, and over the weekend I watched the three tapes of "Video Girl Ai" and I absolutely LOVED them! So, be prepared, for they may be mentioned sometime or another. (I like the little ending clips at the end of the episodes, and Takashi and Yota were doing the Ai fashion show, and the naked picture of Ai turned out to be THEM naked and posing quite . . . heroicly. "Wait! That's the wrong slide!!!")
Now, for the quotes. This was from the Xena episode "Punch Lines," a delightful romp through weirdness. Enjoy.
JOXER: Did you get prunes?
XENA: Yeah, what would life be without prunes?
.............
SHOP CLERK: Excuse me. FIRST you buy it, THEN you eat it.
(Xena spits out her bite of food)
CLERK: Oh, THAT'S lovely.
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Clonk!! when the branding iron hit Ash on the head it made a hollow clonk noise do you know why? Because his head is empty!!!
© 2000, Jaimielée Rocket and Maelstrom
(Next "week's" episode:
"Episode 19: Attack of the Rabid Jigglypuff (REALLY!)
Jessica Sings the Glory of Pies")