It's fun to sit back and laugh at the experiences we had,
not only of ourselves, but sharing those of others...
Back in the old drinking days,
When it really wasn't all that funny, and sometimes even disgusting.
You Might Be An Alcoholic If:
...you loose your car at least once a week.
...you think alcohol abuse is spilling your drink.
...you buy your morning drink with a roll of pennies.
...on the way to the bathroom, someone's always stepping on your hands.
...you don't have any friends, just drinking buddies.
...you quit calling in sick. You let your wife do it.
...you pee in the kitchen sink while mixing another drink.
...selling beer cans seems like a weekly bonus.
...you celebrate getting out of jail by getting drunk.
...you decorate your Christmas tree with chains of beer tabs.
...no visit to a friend's house is complete until
you've puked on their carpet.
...your job is interfering with your drinking.
...the toliet seat keeps hitting you in the back of the head.
...you think the sun shining in your face is God's flashlight telling you to get up and go home.
...you throw-up on purpose so you can hold more.
...it's normal to drive with one eye shut so not to see double.
...you order a keg of beer for your kid's first birthday party.
...you measure distance by how many beers it takes to get there.
...your main prayer is "God, get me out of this and I'll never drink again".
...you get the shakes so bad you could thread a sewing machine while it's running.
...you think your only drinking problem is when you're out.
...you are getting to the point that you're throughly disgusting.
