I was on an airplane headed for California. My son, Benjamin, lay dead in Riverside General Hospital with a bullet in his head. I had asked the doctors to keep him "alive" on life support until I could get there. They assumed this was so I could see his body one last time. In a sense that was true, but they did not know my mission. I was on my way to raise Ben from the dead in Jesus' name. About 6 hours earlier, around 4:00 a.m., my wife, Tami, and I had agreed on this. Her last words to me as I left home for the airport were, "I expect to see you and Ben's smiling face driving up the driveway to greet me soon." I did not doubt God would raise Ben from the dead. This was my mission.

Before I entered Ben's hospital room, I asked God to fill me with the Holy Spirit and give me boldness. I felt confident in the Lord, assured. Tami told me to be sure to have a hospital Chaplain pray with me first, so I asked for one. They sent a timid looking lady Chaplain. Doesn't matter, I said to myself. God will do the work.

I looked at Ben. His head was wrapped in a white bandage, and he looked for all the world like he was sleeping. There was no blood on the bandage. His eyes were closed. He had a sheet covering him from the waist down. I looked at his tan face and chest which he had just gotten from a one month tanning membership I had bought him. I saw his strong chest, gained from the many times we had lifted weights together at the gym. I saw his beautiful face, so handsome, so tender, so gentle. I touched his cheek and it seemed to quiver. So sensitive, I thought. Even now his flesh recoils in sensitivity.

The Chaplain said a little prayer. Then I took Ben's hand in my hand, looked intently at his face, and in a loud voice said, "Ben. Rise to life in Jesus' name!!" He did not move. I put my hand on his cheek, then grabbed his hand again, and raised my right hand to heaven. In an even louder voice I cried out, "Benjamin, Rise to life in Jesus' name!!!" To my utter amazement, he did not move at all.

There can come a time in life when everything you have, everything you believe is on the line. My shattered heart lay in pieces on the floor. My spirit froze in shock and disbelief.........

But where could I turn but to the Lord? My arms shot upward and I said, "Lord, I see You have decided to keep him. So I thank You for the 16 1/2 years we had together. And I glorify Your holy name from one end of earth to the other; And I glorify Your holy name from one end of heaven to the other. The Lord gives and the Lord takes away. Blessed be the name of the Lord."

Somewhere angels are singing, and children play. There are no tears, no sorrows. My only son is there, wrapped in Jesus' love.

My Benjamin. My sweet, sweet Benjamin.

I'll see you soon, my beloved. I'll see you soon.