The Campy Creep Scrapsbook

*note about main picture or that one closest to the top of this page ... yes that is I or some one or thing pretending to be ..me .. wait now.. thaaat iisss ... as i'm looking closer ... IT IS ME, HOLY HOTDOG & DIG DUGS!.. I'm at the portal of the dead or for the lame-man it is the gates, well the big effin' stone monumental sign thing... I don't think they have a gate? .... ? ....? aahhh well if you drive up that crappy driveroad that can't be seen to the right of the guy in the picture, oh yeah me I'm the guy or the thing that is supposed to be a guy is me, well if you go up there a ways, there's a cemetery where they filmed "The Night of the Living Dead", yes the zombie movie filmed by George Romero or a cameraman? Oh wait they didn't make the whole flick there, just the beginning in case you're stupid and didn't know that, or a pimply A-hole that doesn't even care anyway, no offense! Sew if you are like near Pittsburgh go north up like eye-seventy-nine & like watch for an "Evans City" exit sign, not to be confused with Bob Evans that fondles your sausage .. oh yeah watch for that sign I mentioned already, but don't forget to turn off at the exit. After that yer on yer own, sorry not sure of my direction between ramping & the non-gate, because of the blindfold .. I did however manage to use my other 5 senses! I heard the sound of running water .. and let see...while flying my WWII fighter hand plane out the window, it crashed into what hurt like a mailbox at 60 mph ... ahhh ...anyway then the smell of roadkill, not that hard to find flick with Joey Ramone, you know something that got hit by a common "I hate animals" jackass in his big truck with a little dink or some stoned loser in his shitbox mini-van, that didn't have time to miss the little bass terd, because they zoned out, when they saw the gleamimg headlight reflection in the little critters "Oh animal god is that you?" eyes, but that doesn't matter, for now it is a buzzing lump lying in the sun on the hot black top.. way too long... you try straddling it .. but it is so bloated with the gas from it's rotting busted guts inside it catches the underside of .......... anyway then I got a vomit taste in my mouth, finally mentally I felt odder than usual.... well so I reckon to get there just look for some water, probably still running, then a mailbox with dents like the end of an idiot's fingers that were breaking the speed limit, possible including small bits of campy flesh... ...then what used to be a varmint, stray puppy or someone's cat fluffy's fuzzy highway stain...now just go until you find a pile of old puke & finally, if you've got that lost or confused feeling in your brains, then you are probably there? Have fun & may a zombie eat whatever brains you may have in your skull at the time it will be 4:00 AM ...