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Is there such a thing as the average American female? I think that it
might be possible, although I would never presume to speak for all
females everywhere, I think we do share enough feminine traits that a
literary license will allow me to draw from.
In doing this, I am assuming that I am an average American female. That
idea in itself causes my female instincts to surface. I need to be
"individualized", to be myself, not like any other person in existence.
Therefore, you have to understand that I think thoughts that no-one has
ever thought before. Don't worry if you don't get it. It simply means
that you are male and not intended to understand.
I have been thinking a lot about male versus female and the different
roles we assume at birth. So I have come to understand that males cannot
help it if they don't understand females, in fact, I think it was part
of God's universal plan to make it so. Can you imagine a lifetime with a
mate who understood your every utterance? Simply unthinkable. But I
think it will help if our male counterpart could understand a few truths about the females in their
life. So I will endeavor to be as straight forward as any male you have ever known to expedite a bit
of enlightenment.
It's been my experience that most men are very concrete in their
thinking processes. For instance, a woman asks her mate a simple
question, "Does my hair look okay?". He knows his mate expects total
honesty in their relationship so he responds with something to this
effect. "Yes, honey your hair looks fine." Little does he know that he
has just totally blown it. Her question was simple enough. Why did he
not know what she wanted? Because he thinks in literal/concrete terms.
But now he has broken her heart and she may never speak to him again.
To avoid this situation in the future, I'll try to explain this in ways
that anyone can understand. When she asked, "Does my hair look okay?",
this is the process his mind should have instantly gone through to fully
understand her.
His first thought should have been she asked me a question and she used
the word 'look'. So he should have instantly turned from the TV. Next,
he should have thought like this in process - hair, head, "heart". After
all, her hair is on her head, her head is on her body which contains her
heart. Now he has an idea that what she asked is really related to matters of
the heart. And that has to do with love. So almost instantly he should
have said, "I love you more than I have ever loved anyone in my entire
life!!"
See how simple that was? Now that you understand the process, you should
be able to understand the woman in your life perfectly. That is unless
she asks, "Does this purse go well with my outfit?" Then it's a whole
new ball game.
Please keep in mind that this is a 'tongue-in-cheek'look at the male-female relationship.
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