Gigi Sinclair

jacksondn@usaf.gov
To: davispc@usaf.gov
Date: 22 Dec 1306 (MST)
Subject: Request for Equipment Requisition

Major Davis:

I have received authorization from Colonel O'Neill to request that one (1) bundle of Christmas cheer be delivered to the SGC by, at the latest, 1800 hours December 24. Please advise as to the likelihood of fulfilling this request.

Regards,

Dr. D. Jackson

From: davispc@usaf.gov
To: jacksondn@usaf.gov
Date: 22 Dec 1554 (EST)
Subject: Re: Request for Equipment Requisition

Dear Dr. Jackson,

I have received your request, but cannot advise you until I know the specifics of what you require. Please send further details.

Major Paul Davis

From: dusty_daniel@hotmail.com
To: groundcontrol2mjrpaul@yahoo.com
Date: December 22 17:03
Subject: Equipment Specifics

Paul,

I require five feet ten inches of Air Force officer, ideally wearing nothing but strategically placed melted chocolate, although the latter is negotiable. I would also accept fondue cheese or red silk bikini briefs.

Daniel

"Imagination is more important than knowledge." Albert Einstein

From: davispc@usaf.gov
To: jacksondn@usaf.gov
Date: 23 Dec 0837 (EST)
Subject: Re: Request for Equipment Requisition

Dear Dr. Jackson,

As per our telephone conversation of last night, arrangements have been confirmed to deliver the item you requested. It will arrive in Colorado Springs via commercial air transport at 1750 MST tomorrow.

I regret that red was not available. I hope that black will suffice.

Sincerely,

Major Paul Davis

From: jacksondn@usaf.gov
To: davispc@usaf.gov
Date: 23 Dec 0916 (MST)
Subject: Thank You

Major Davis:

I appreciate your efforts to fulfil my request. I will personally meet the shipment at the appointed time. And black is fine. I would also have accepted pink, although I doubt you would have.

Thank you for your assistance,

Dr. D. Jackson

PS: Colonel O'Neill wishes to know if you are celebrating the season by "shoving a Christmas tree up your ass instead of the usual poker." I have informed him that I will verify this the next time we meet in person.

From: groundcontrol2mjrpaul@yahoo.com
To: dusty_daniel@hotmail.com
Date: Dec 23 12:27
Subject: Re: Thank You

Dear Dr. Jackson,

Fuck you.

Sincerely,

Major Paul Davis

Do You Yahoo?!

Block Spam today: www.yahoo.com/spamspamspam

From: jacksondn@usaf.gov
To: davispc@usaf.gov
Date: 23 Dec 1219 (MST)
Subject: Re: Thank You

Major Davis:

That's always a possibility.

Dr. D. Jackson

***

From: davispc@usaf.gov
To: jacksondn@usaf.gov
Date: 28 Dec 1004 (EST)
Subject: Misplaced USAF Property

Dear Dr. Jackson,

Would it be possible for you to verify if any property was mistakenly left behind after my last visit to the SGC?

Major Paul Davis

From: jacksondn@usaf.gov
To: davispc@usaf.gov
Date: 28 Dec 1137 (MST)
Subject: Re: Misplaced USAF Property

Major Davis:

Could you be a little more specific?

Dr. D. Jackson

From: groundcontrol2mjrpaul@yahoo.com
To: dusty_daniel@hotmail.com
Date: Dec 28 19:23
Subject: Come on, Daniel

You emptied my suitcase when I wasn't looking and filled it with used wrapping paper and books about pharaohs. Do you have any idea how much trouble I could get into? I told those people I packed my own suitcase. I thought I had! Jesus, they could have given me a body cavity search.

Do You Yahoo?!

Block Spam today: www.yahoo.com/spamspamspamspam

From: dusty_daniel@hotmail.com
To: groundcontrol2mjrpaul@yahoo.com
Date: Dec 28 22:11
Subject: Re: Come on, Daniel

>>Jesus, they could have given me a body
cavity search.

Honestly, Paul, you are insatiable. ;)

Anyway, I don't think the government has reference books on its list of terrorist-like items. Yet. And I had to do something to get you back here for New Year's Eve.

D.

"Imagination is more important than
information." Albert Einstein

From: davispc@usaf.gov
To: jacksondn@usaf.gov
Date: 29 Dec 0854 (EST)
Subject: Your Request for Equipment
Requisition

Dear Dr. Jackson,

After very careful consideration, your request has been approved. Please prepare for delivery at 1600 MST December 31.

Yours truly,

Major Paul Davis

PS: Eleven books about Egyptian history will be accompanying this shipment. I will expect that the necessary exchange will be effectuated upon arrival.

From: dusty_daniel@hotmail.com
To: groundcontrol2mjrpaul@yahoo.com
Date: Dec 29 11:44
Subject: Re: Request for Equipment
Requisition

Paul dear,

You will have no need for your clothes, trust me.

Although, if you insist, I suppose I'll just have to think of another way to coax you back for Valentine's Day. You know I always like a challenge. Tell me, do you still have that little fetish of yours?

Daniel xx

"Imagination is more important than knowledge." Albert Einstein

***

From: davispc@usaf.gov
To: hammondgl@usaf.gov
Cc: oneilljr@usaf.gov, cartersm@usaf.gov, jacksondn@usaf.gov, sg-team-leaders@usaf.gov, kinsey@ussenate.org
Date: 08 Jan 1457 (EST)
Subject: Upcoming Audit

This is to advise you that I will soon be conducting my annual audit of the SGC's operating procedures and effectiveness. This audit is primarily for budgetary purposes and will occur the second week in February. I will be at Cheyenne Mountain from February 13 through 15. Please schedule an appointment to speak with me, noting that I will be unavailable from 1800 MST February 14 through 0800 MST February 15.

Regards,

Major Paul Davis