TITLE: The Proposal
AUTHOR: Matteabrit, Sept 02
SUMMARY: Kathryn’s having problems replacing her original crew for a new mission. Chakotay has a few ideas of his own.
RATING: PG
DISCLAIMER: Not mine, darn it!!
NOTE: Thanks to SaRa, my dear beta. Oh, and feedback always appreciated!
***
Kathryn looked over the files before her and sighed. Starfleet had trusted her to come up with a full crew complement for the Voyager-A, and there had been no shortage of applicants. Since the ship's miraculous return to the Alpha Quadrant she had become second in the fleet to the Enterprise. Those who could not get a posting on the fleet's flagship vied for a position under the command of who many saw as the most able captain around.
She picked up her third mug of coffee and began to read the first padd of the day. Most of the candidates appeared to be of similar calibre, eager to go straight to a prestigious position. Those were the ones she discarded; any crewmember of hers had to be prepared to fit in wherever needed. Harry, now Lieutenant Commander Kim, was her benchmark. Thrown in at the deep end on his first tour of duty, he had proven himself time and time over, bold enough to take the initiative yet still awed by the situation in which he had found himself in.
"Having problems?" a friendly voice asked.
Kathryn looked up and saw her best friend standing in the doorway. "No more than usual," she replied, beckoning him into her office. "How did you get in here anyway?"
He took the seat opposite her and propped his feet up on her desk, ignoring the glare flashed in his direction. "I think they're still afraid of me," he replied grinning. "Either that or they're afraid of you." He nodded. "Yeah, I think that's more likely. They're afraid of you. Anyway, what's up?"
"What's up is that I am still trying to find a crew for Voyager," she told him wearily. "I never thought it would be so difficult."
"How many of our lot do you have to replace?"
"Nearly all of them," she admitted. "And almost every single member of my senior staff." She smiled sadly. "And that is proving to be the hardest of all. I shouldn't be having to look for a new first officer."
He shrugged it off. "Sometimes it just works out like that."
"Doesn't it make you mad though?" She leaned forward, propping her chin on her hands and staring across the desk at him.
"Why should it?"
"But Chakotay, they took away your rank, your title, everything."
"Kathryn, I'm damned lucky they didn't take away my freedom. Besides, I really don't mind." He paused. "On Voyager, I didn't mind wearing the uniform so much. Perhaps it's because Starfleet and the Federation were so far away. You asked me to serve for a reason that made sense and so I did. I wasn't a part of Starfleet so much as a part of Voyager. Does that make sense?"
Kathryn nodded. "It does. Trust me." She paused and sighed again. "Oh, Chakotay, I am so going to miss your counsel."
"Just my counsel?" he asked, with a wicked grin on his face.
She wrinkled her face and pretended to think for a moment. "Well, maybe your cooking as well."
Chakotay leaned back and laughed. "Well, I'm sure you'll find a replacement for that. I hear the new ship is going to be a lot bigger than ours."
"It is," she confirmed. "The A is going to be a deep space scientific research vessel, suitable for crewmembers to bring their families along." She smiled weakly. "And even with that specification I still can't get half of the old crew to sign on. Sam wants Naomi to spend some time in one place and Tom and B'Elanna still don't qualify."
Chakotay closed his eyes for a moment. "Seems you're going to be pretty much on your own."
"Me and Harry, that's it. I'm debating making him first officer but still..." She paused. "I'm going to miss my first first officer."
He nodded. "So crewmembers can bring their families," he began slowly, still deep in thought.
"Yes."
"Even captains?"
"What?"
"Can captains bring their families as well?"
Kathryn nodded, confused. "Yes. But I don't think dogs are quite what Starfleet had in mind. Not after Archer's dog created all that havoc years ago."
Chakotay laughed. "I remember being taught about that. Porthos the space-faring dog." He opened his eyes, pulled his feet back off the desk and stood up. "Actually, I wasn't thinking about the captain's dog," he said slowly. "I was thinking more along the lines of the captain's husband."
Kathryn let out a snort. "Sure, Chakotay. Where am I supposed to get a hus..." Her voice trailed off as she suddenly saw the intensity of her friend's expression. "Chakotay," she breathed.
She watched, unable to take her eyes off him, as he slowly stood up and made his way around to her side of the desk. Since Voyager's return they had spent a lot of time together and Kathryn had fought to keep old feelings at bay, thinking that perhaps Chakotay had actually moved on and just wanted a friendship from her. What she thought he was about to do now was a complete surprise.
Now kneeling awkwardly by her chair he looked up at her. "Marry me, Kathryn," he said softly. They stared at each other wordlessly until he shuffled on his knees, grimaced, and muttered, "I am too old for this."
The moment was broken. They burst out laughing and she hauled him back to his feet. He took a seat on the corner of the desk and smiled. "How about it, Kathryn? You can make the marriage whatever you want, but at least I'll be there with you." Chakotay cupped a hand under her chin. "I know you, Kathryn. You'll be contacting me whenever you get the opportunity to bemoan the fact that your new XO doesn't understand you." He paused and considered his statement. "Okay, so maybe I didn't quite understand you at times, but you know what I mean."
She smiled, still in awe of this amazing man. "But what about you? I mean, what would you do on a ship for a year? I appreciate your sentiment, I really do, but you've got to think about yourself."
"Trust me, Kathryn. There are a lot worse places I could be than to be by your side. In fact, the worst thing I can think of is not being by your side. As for what I can do, well, you know I've been asked to write that book, don't you, and I'm sure Harry will be wanting my advice on more than one occasion." He smiled. "I think we both know it will be Harry that becomes your new first officer."
"He does know me," Kathryn admitted ruefully. "But Chakotay." She paused. The idea of marrying Chakotay was definitely appealing. No, it was more than appealing, she realised. She would love to marry Chakotay. She loved Chakotay.
It wasn't that the realisation of the depth of her feelings hit her suddenly; it was something she had gradually been coming aware of for some time. The problem was deciphering just what exactly he felt for her.
Kathryn took a deep breath. "You say that our marriage could be whatever I wanted it to be? Even if it's nothing more than one of convenience?"
She thought she could see the doubt in Chakotay's eyes. "If that's what you wanted it to be," he told her calmly. But it looked as though that was not what he wanted.
"What if I want a full marriage?" she asked slowly. "What if I say I won't have a sham marriage, that it has to be the full thing or nothing?"
"Kathryn?" His eyes widened and now she knew just how he felt. Once more he would have been willing to sacrifice his own life for hers.
"I love you, Chakotay." The words came out quietly, so quietly she wondered if she had even said them out loud. "I won't marry you for any other reason than for love," she said more boldly. "I'd rather be out there alone than have a marriage of convenience."
He placed both hands around her face and raised it up to look into her eyes. "Do you really mean that, Kathryn? Do you really love me?" She nodded, as much as she was able to with her chin cradled in his hands. A huge smile broke out across his face and Kathryn thought he had never looked so gorgeous as at that moment. "I love you, too," he whispered.
Their lips met, a sweet joining that had taken far too long to happen. She felt his tongue gently probe for entrance and she opened her mouth to him willingly, tasting him for the first time. It seemed to last forever, but had to come to a close when both had to pull away due to lack of breath.
"So, can I take that as a yes?" Chakotay laughed.
"Yes," she told him. "Yes, yes, and yes again. I'll marry you, Chakotay. Of course I will."
"Thank you," he said. Picking up a padd from her desk he stared at it for a moment. "Okay, you've got yourself a first officer and a husband. What position is next on your list?"
"How about Chief Engineer?"
"Now that could be a tough one."
FINIS
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