Disclaimer: Paramount owns them. I'm just playing.
"Ohhhhhh." His low groan could barely be heard, but he still grabbed his head when the sound left his mouth. His only thought was to hold his head on and to stop the incessant pounding. All he could hear was that damn pounding, as if his heart had lodged itself right next to his eardrums, pumping happily away.
'I have NEVER had a hangover like this before,' Chakotay thought, 'my God, even the hairs on my head h...'
Suddenly, Chakotay bolted upright, realizing what felt very wrong about this situation.
"My hair!" He screamed. The sound echoed throughout his quarters.
That was a mistake!
He grabbed his head again, slamming his eyes shut. The room began to spin, his hangover not allowing him to adapt to movement or sound, both of which he had just done at full force.
His hands once again resting on his head, Chakotay moved them tentatively, confirming his worst suspicions.
Yep, no hair, and absolutely no recollection of how this could have happened!
He racked his brain, trying to remember, but there was nothing. Damn that Neelix! When would he learn not to trust Neelix's concoctions? It tasted like champagne, but obviously, there was no way in hell that was champagne. This is one New Year's Day he'd never forget!
Chakotay carefully moved his legs over the side of the bed, waiting a moment for his stomach to settle. Once he felt like he could move without passing out, he got out of bed and made his way to the bathroom. He splashed cold water onto his face, drying his hands before finding the courage to look at himself.
'Well, there it is,' he thought, 'the final proof. How could this have happened?'
Chakotay leaned against the sink for support, hanging his head and rubbing his hand over his face and eyes. He had no idea how he was going to explain this one.
He shuffled back to the bed and lowered himself down onto his pillows, pulling the covers up over himself. When they got stuck, he half-heartedly pulled again, closing his eyes, ready to drift back to sleep for a few more hours.
"You're hogging all the covers." A female voice muttered, slightly muffled.
Once again, Chakotay flung himself upright, searching for the owner of that voice.
"Kathryn?" He gasped, spotting the auburn hair resting on his pillow, a creamy white shoulder peeking out.
"Chakotay," Kathryn moaned, almost in a whine, "you're killing me here. Just lie back down. And please, stop moving." By the time she had finished, her voice had dwindled to barely a whisper. She had obviously drifted right back to sleep.
But Chakotay knew he would never be able to sleep now. What the hell was Kathryn doing in his quarters, in his bed? Was she naked? What the hell happened last night?
Chakotay mulled over possible scenarios, but his mind refused to cooperate. He just couldn't think and he was still so tired. Without even realizing it, he was asleep, blissfully unaware of spooning up to his Captain.
It was hours later when Chakotay woke up again. It was a slow process this time, as if he had just come out of a month long hibernation. There was no pounding, only a slight haziness as he brought himself to awareness.
Although his mind was slow to cooperate, he soon remembered the events from his earlier bout with consciousness. His hand rubbed against his head, his now baldhead, as he ran through possible scenarios for such an occurrence.
"Computer, time." Chakotay asked, his voice still husky from sleep.
"The time is eleven hundred hours." The computer promptly replied.
"Computer, lights, fifty percent." Chakotay then instructed as he pulled himself up. He sat there a moment longer, deep in thought. There still weren't any answers, nor was Kathryn in his quarters. How could he lose his hair and have Kathryn in his bed and not remember? It was all very surreal. If he didn't have the evidence, or lack of it, right there on top of his head, he wouldn't believe it himself.
"Computer, locate Captain Janeway." Chakotay again turned to the computer for answers.
"Captain Janeway is in her ready room."
"Of course she is," Chakotay muttered sarcastically, "where else would she be after spending the night in my bed?"
Chakotay had made his way over to the replicator, hoping a cup of tea would clear the lingering cobwebs from his brain. He needed some answers and he wanted them before coming face-to-face with any of the crew. More important, he needed to know if anything had happened between him and Kathryn. Wouldn't it be ironic if, after all these years, he and Kathryn finally acted on their feelings, and he couldn't remember! The fates could certainly be cruel, but he was hoping not that cruel.
He made himself comfortable on the sofa. After all, this was his day off. Technically, he didn't need to leave his quarters at all. This would give him plenty of time to think, to dwell, to worry, to hope, to...
Chakotay was deep in thought when his door chimed.
"Come in," he mumbled, so absorbed in his thoughts that he completely forgot about his current condition.
He looked up expectantly when he heard the door open and close. B'Elanna stood there, mouth agape, eyes wide, not saying a word.
"Hey B'Elanna." Chakotay said, smiling a greeting at one of his closest friends.
B'Elanna just continued to stare, her mouth working, but no sound coming out.
Chakotay leaned forward, wondering why B'Elanna was just standing there. "Did you need me for something?" He asked.
"Chakotay!" B'Elanna finally blurted out, "What the hell happened to your hair?"
Chakotay quickly reached up and covered the top of his head. He rubbed for a moment, still not used to the feel of such a clean scalp.
Chakotay sheepishly looked back to B'Elanna, shrugging his shoulders. "I'm not really sure," he admitted, gesturing for her to sit beside him, "Maybe you could shed some light on that."
"Me," B'Elanna squeaked, "Why would I know anything about this? I mean..." she fumbled to a stop, gesturing with her hands as she fought for the right words. When none came to her, she just shook her head, baffled. "... Oh, Chakotay, you're beautiful hair. What were you thinking?"
Chakotay slumped back into the sofa at B'Elanna's words, his hands moving down to cover his face. "I have no idea. I'm slowly seeing bits and pieces of the night, but nothing to help with this dilemma... or another." Chakotay mumbled the last, but B'Elanna was not one to let mumbled statements pass by without clarification.
"What other?" She was quick to ask, her curiosity piqued.
"What?" Chakotay returned before realizing to what B'Elanna was referring, "Oh, nothing, I was just thinking. Listen, I'd appreciate it if you kept this under wrap until I get some answers of my own. The last thing I need is to be ship gossip for the day. Your husband has enough bets going without adding my hair to the list."
"Or lack thereof." B'Elanna quickly corrected, trying in vain not to laugh. Now that the shock had worn off, the humor of the situation was starting to take its place.
"Good, real good." Chakotay replied deadpan. That lasted for a second, before he too was chuckling.
"And I'm sure you don't want the Captain to find out about this any sooner than she has to." B'Elanna was quick to point out, hoping to diffuse Chakotay's concerns.
"Somehow, I have a feeling she already knows." Chakotay murmured in response.
B'Elanna rubbed Chakotay's shoulder in commiseration. "Don't worry, Chakotay, my lips are sealed. No one will hear about this from me."
"Thanks B'Ela. But, hey," Chakotay reminded her, "you didn't come here to listen to my problems. Was there something you wanted?"
"Oh, I almost forgot." B'Elanna jumped up, "I wanted to remind you about the picnic a bunch of us are putting together on the holodeck. I'm on my way to pick up all the necessary ingredients, and I'm sure a few unnecessary ingredients when dealing with Neelix," Chakotay chuckled in agreement as B'Elanna continued, "and then I'm heading over to the holodeck. Tom's on his way there now."
"I did forget. Sorry B'Elanna." Chakotay apologized. "It sounds fun, but I don't think I'm ready for all the questions yet. Will you make my excuses?" Chakotay asked.
"You got it big guy." B'Elanna stood up to leave, "I'll check in on you later and see how it's coming."
Chakotay also stood and hugged B'Elanna, silently thanking her for her support. "Have fun."
"Yeah, you too... baldy." B'Elanna couldn't resist adding as she fled quickly, her laughter following her into the corridor.
Now that Chakotay was alone, he needed to come up with a plan to get some answers without baring his situation. He stretched back on the sofa, letting his mind drift. Maybe if he didn't think about it too much, he'd start remembering the previous evening on his own.
Snatches of conversations and events began to filter through Chakotay's mind. He slowly began to put them in order, trying to remember at exactly what point he no longer remembered...
He arrived at Kathryn's quarters at just about 2000 hours. They had a wonderful dinner, which she replicated. Thank God! Chakotay automatically smiled whenever he thought of Kathryn cooking. It amazed him, and amused him, that such a strong, yet feminine, woman like Kathryn had such a black thumb in the 'kitchen'. He just couldn't understand it. Even when she tried to cook a wonderful meal, she couldn't make it happen. But replicating dinner, now that was Kathryn's specialty!
They had a couple of glasses of wine each. Not the synthehol, the real stuff. After all, it was New Year's Eve. They discussed ship's business a little, but then quickly moved away from ship-talk and just started to, well, talk.
Neither of them were in a rush to get to the New Year's Eve party Neelix had put together, with the help of Tom of course. As always, they wanted to give the crew time to relax and indulge a little before arriving. This way, the crew was less apt to tense up and become subdued once their commanding officers showed up.
Around 2230, Neelix contacted them to let them know that everyone had arrived. Now, they were the only ones not yet at the party. Only those on duty would not be at this New Year's Eve party; but, they would be there at the stroke of midnight - duty or not. It had become tradition over the years for the whole 'family' to come together to bring in the New Year. A tradition Kathryn insisted on... and one Chakotay wholeheartedly supported.
Chakotay and Kathryn arrived at the party together. They stood in the entrance, observing the crowd. They commented to each other about how happy the crew looked and how much fun everyone seemed to be having.
Neelix was the first to spot them and quickly made his way over to them, offering them each a glass of his 'homemade' champagne. Kathryn and Chakotay shared a quick glance, skeptical at best, before sampling Neelix's brew. Chakotay remembered thinking that it tasted just like champagne. He even told Neelix that he was impressed. Kathryn shared the sentiment before they each went in different directions.
It was time to mingle, to give a minute or two to each crewmember... to just be another person at the party. This was always hard for Kathryn, not because she didn't love and appreciate her crew, but because she knew it was hard for most of them to separate their Captain from the woman, Kathryn.
Chakotay had developed the habit of looking out for Kathryn in these situations. He would look for her in the crowd and make sure she was okay. He would know just by a simple look or gesture if she needed or wanted his company.
This is where things started to get a little blurry. He couldn't even remember how many glasses of that damn champagne he had. All he knew was that he had been talking with Tom and B'Elanna when all of a sudden he stumbled. One minute he was standing there, listening to some story Tom was telling, the next, B'Elanna was holding him up, asking him if he was all right. Tom was laughing so Chakotay told him to 'fuck off'. There was no particular reason for this type of comment, it just seemed appropriate at the time. Tom laughed even harder.
He remembered that much because that was when Kathryn responded instead of Tom, her voice right behind him. "Is that any way for a First Officer to talk," Kathryn asked, her humor evident, "In front of his Captain no less?"
Chakotay didn't remember his exact answer, but it was something along the lines of, 'tonight, I'm just a man and you're a woman.' That comment alone had Chakotay dropping his head into his hands. He wasn't sure, but he thinks he might have said 'my' woman instead of 'a' woman.
Back in the present, in Chakotay's quarters, Chakotay's thoughts were whirling. "This wasn't looking good," he thought, "but, then again, Kathryn did spend the night in my bed, so it couldn't be that bad, right?" Chakotay's moan filled the room. So many thoughts, he didn't know what was real and what wasn't.
An hour later, Chakotay was a lot calmer. It was all starting to come back to him. Now, all he had to do was confront the culprit, or the instigator if you will. Now, where was that hat?
Kathryn's ready room door chimed. She smiled a secretive smile, knowing just who was on the other side of that door.
"Finally," she thought. Kathryn was wondering when Chakotay would put all the pieces together and come to her. After all, she was the Captain. Kathryn laughed at this train of thought. She had had her fair share of Neelix's brew last night too. Not everything about last night was as clear as she wanted it to be either.
Kathryn took her time answering, allowing herself time to prepare for the upcoming confrontation. She didn't respond until the door chimed a second time.
"Come in." Kathryn called, barely containing her smile before the doors opened and revealed Chakotay.
At the sight of him, she almost lost it. But only she knew that. All Chakotay saw was a very composed Captain with a somewhat inquiring look on her face.
Her gesture, indicating his head, confirmed exactly what she was inquiring about.
"What's with the hat?" she finally asked when Chakotay didn't answer her silent question.
Chakotay's brow raised as he took a step closer, his look and tone somewhat menacing, "Oh, I think you know exactly what's with the hat." he answered.
"I do?" She calmly questioned, also taking a step closer, bringing her and Chakotay within inches of one another. At this distance, she had to slightly look up at him. But in no way did this leave her at a disadvantage. With this situation, they were on equal footing and they both knew it.
Chakotay decided to use the direct approach, hoping to throw Kathryn for a loop and gain the advantage. "I hope you slept well last night. What time did you leave my quarters this morning?"
Kathryn blinked, the only sign that she was fazed in any way by the question. She took her time answering, leaning back against her desk and contemplating the man in front of her. "I slept very well, thank you. And you?"
"Dammit, Kathryn." Chakotay lost his composure, letting his frustration show. "I can't win this battle, can I?"
Kathryn answered Chakotay with a bland smile and a slight shake of her head.
Chakotay gave up, throwing his hands in the air as he walked to the upper level of Kathryn's ready room. He sat on the sofa and ran his fingers through his hair. Well, he meant to do that, but stopped when he felt his scalp instead.
Kathryn watched Chakotay. When his hands dropped back to his side, he turned and looked at her, silently demanding answers. Kathryn took pity on him.
"You know," she said, pulling away from her desk and making her way up to him, "it really doesn't look that bad." Kathryn's gesture toward Chakotay's head was unnecessary. They both knew what she was talking about.
"I've gotten used to it." Chakotay replied. "Well, almost used to it," he amended.
"Kind of sexy in fact." Kathryn continued blandly. "Coffee?"
"Kathryn." Chakotay growled as Kathryn walked past him and continued on to the replicator.
Kathryn chuckled at Chakotay's impatience. "Okay, okay, I'm coming. But in order to have this conversation, I need my coffee."
Chakotay watched Kathryn and waited. He wondered how honest she would be with him now that she was finally ready to sit and talk. She didn't seem nervous, but her comment about needing coffee was a sure sign that she wasn't as blasé as she seemed.
Now that she had her coffee, Kathryn sipped thoughtfully, occasionally glancing at Chakotay. After several moments, it was obvious that Chakotay wasn't going to help her in anyway.
Kathryn met Chakotay's gaze straight on, her eyebrow raised questioningly. Her silent, "well?" could be heard throughout the room.
Chakotay finally broke the silence. "Kathryn, why did you stay with me last night?"
At his words, Kathryn knew he remembered far more than she thought he would have. At this revelation, she felt an odd fluttering in her stomach. She was nervous! My God, she thought, I'm actually nervous. Well, not nervous, she stipulated. Maybe flustered and anxious were better adjectives to describe what she was feeling.
What if what happened last night was just a drunken mistake? Kathryn didn't feel that way, but was worried that Chakotay might. After all, before last night, he had been doing a very good job of disguising his feelings. She knew he loved her, as friends do. But, as far as wanting anything more, she just wasn't sure. She knew this was why she did what she did. She wanted to know. Now all she needed was to find out his reasons.
Not that anything did happen last night. Well, not much of anything, she thought with a smile.
Chakotay wasn't quite sure what to make of that smile.
"What?" he asked.
"Do you know how worried you look sitting there?" Kathryn returned, not yet ready to directly answer his questions.
"Me? Worried?" he asked lightheartedly, "Now, why should I be worried? After all, I only woke up this morning with no hair and a naked woman in my bed. That's no reason to worry."
"Hey," Kathryn indignantly replied, "I wasn't naked."
Chakotay knew Kathryn wasn't really upset. Her tone said one thing, but the sparkle in her eyes told a completely different story. She was enjoying this. And, so was he.
"Oh, sorry, let me rephrase," Chakotay continued at this revelation, "no hair and an almost naked woman in my bed. Better?"
"Much," Kathryn said before breaking down in laughter. Chakotay was quick to follow. By the time they were able to contain themselves and sit upright again, both had to wipe the tears from their eyes.
Chakotay took the lead, reaching for Kathryn's hand and stroking her palm. It was time to get some things straight with them, straighter than they had ever been.
"I have very strong feelings for you, you know." he started out by saying.
At his words, tears of a different kind sprang to Kathryn's eyes. "Chakotay," was all she could get out for the moment.
"Shhh," he interrupted, "I'm not done yet."
At that, Kathryn looked him square in the eye, her eyebrow raising high. Chakotay was amused at this, and it showed.
"I've hidden them behind friendship, not wanting to push. Until last night that is." It was confession time for Chakotay and he was going to use this opportunity to put it all out there and see just what Kathryn intended to do with it. If last night was any indication, Chakotay was sure the outcome would be positive, for both of them.
"My memories are still a little hazy, but I remember you helping me back to my quarters a little after the New Year." Kathryn was nodding her head in agreement so Chakotay continued.
"Once we got inside, I hugged you to me and asked you for a kiss." Chakotay was watching Kathryn closely, looking for agreement. Another nod.
"I know it was that damn 'champagne', but I don't regret that at all. I wish I had asked years ago. I was reeling from that kiss. So were you." Another nod, this one ccompanied by a softening in Kathryn's face, a slight flush to her cheeks.
Kathryn interrupted at this point, her voice huskier than normal, "you asked me to sleep with you?"
Chakotay blushed at this, "You know I didn't mean..."
Kathryn put a finger over Chakotay's lips, silencing him as she left her finger there, rubbing softly back and forth as she continued, "I know what you meant. Do you remember what happened after?"
"I remember you daring me to shave my head! I still don't understand that." Chakotay let his confusion show, "Why did you dare me to shave my head, of all things?"
Kathryn started laughing again and playfully slapped Chakotay across the arm, "I didn't DARE you. And, really, I never thought you would actually do it."
"Then, what...?" Chakotay began.
"It was a stalling tactic Chakotay," Kathryn admitted, "I knew I was a little drunk and wasn't really sure I could sleep, just sleep, with you if we were in bed together."
Chakotay's eyes went hot as Kathryn continued. Her desire for him, stated so plainly, made him burn with desire for her. Kathryn didn't notice as she continued, trying to explain how they got to this point.
"You were very persuasive with your argument and kept kissing me and finally offered to do anything if I would just let you hold me through the night. I was running my fingers through your hair and thinking how soft it was and beautiful and..." Kathryn peeked up at Chakotay at this point, her eyes hot with the memory.
"Anyway." Kathryn took a deep breath before continuing, "I just blurted out 'would you shave your head?' You didn't respond at all and we continued to kiss. When we started to do more than that, you got up from the sofa and told me you'd be right back."
Chakotay had pulled Kathryn closer to him as she talked. She leaned into him, absorbing his warmth and closeness.
"Then I came back with a shaved head." Chakotay finished for her.
Kathryn laughed at this, amused. "Pretty much. I swear, I had no idea you were going to do it. I wouldn't have let you."
She pulled herself away from Chakotay so that she could see his face. She was worried he was still upset. His smile reassured her. "I didn't even think you heard me." She said.
"All I was thinking was that I had to hold you and if that's what you wanted me to do, well, then, by God, I was going to do it." Chakotay chuckled, remembering, "And I'd do it again."
"Oh, easy to say now that's it's already done." Kathryn joked.
"No Kathryn," Chakotay grew serious, "Having you in my bed, holding you through the night, was a dream come true, even if I don't remember most of it." Chakotay tried to lighten the conversation, not wanting to scare her off. "Hair just doesn't compare."
Kathryn threw herself into his arms and hugged him tight. Her feelings for this man were so strong, she knew she'd never be able to contain them again. To hell with protocol. She needed this man and she wouldn't deny it ever again.
"I have strong feelings for you too you know." She mumbled into his neck, nibbling delicately on his ear.
"I know," Chakotay said, turning his head to capture her lips in a powerful kiss.
After awhile, breathing heavy, they pulled apart. Kathryn was the first to speak. "How do we explain this?" she asked.
"We don't need to explain anything." Chakotay answered quickly, afraid Kathryn was having second thoughts. "Nobody needs to know right away."
"No?" Kathryn countered, "You don't think they'll notice that you no longer have any hair."
"Oh, right, my hair." Chakotay breathed a sigh of relief. Kathryn didn't say anything, but he knew she knew what he had been thinking. "Well, I don't think the truth'll do, do you?"
"No," Kathryn laughed, "definitely not. Tom has enough fuel for the betting pool. I wonder if anyone ever bet on this scenario."
"You knew about that?" Chakotay asked.
Speculation regarding the Captain and her First Officer kept the betting pool alive throughout their journey in the Delta Quadrant. Although they never spoke about it before now, Chakotay wasn't surprised that she had known all along.
"Of course," She confirmed matter-of-factly before continuing with possible 'bald' explanations. "Well, we could just tell them a somewhat half-truth."
"And what would that be?" Chakotay wondered aloud.
"That we were wondering what you would look like with the Picard-look. And since you were a little intoxicated, you decided to give it a shot." Kathryn rambled off this explanation too quickly for Chakotay's tastes.
"So that's where your idea came from?" Chakotay didn't know whether he should feel insulted or not. "You're kissing me and you're thinking about Captain Picard?"
Kathryn started to laugh, stunned at Chakotay's reasoning and reaction. "It wasn't like that Chakotay. I swear." Kathryn had to stop explaining she was laughing so hard. Chakotay leaned back and glared as he waited for her to contain her mirth.
"Laugh it up." He finally said as she caught her breath. "You're not the one who's bald."
"Oh, but Chakotay," Kathryn's voice lowered as she slithered onto his chest, resting her breasts against his chest, "I like the bald look on you."
Her fingers walked up his neck and higher until she was rubbing the back of his head. Chakotay swallowed, arching into her touch.
"Very sexy." Kathryn continued. She was so close, her lips brushed against his as she spoke. Chakotay reached up, pulling Kathryn in for a passionate kiss. If this is what happened to her because he's bald, maybe he'd just keep it this way. Whatever she wanted, as long as she wanted, as long as they went forward together.
THE END
