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My crust of filth came off with the first cycle of water. When the timid, unbeautiful women brought out a third bath refill, I was feeling human once more. I stared at the cuts and calluses hidden from me for so long. I grabbed his foot and raised it to my face. My feet were ugly. I curled up my lip in disgust.

It was on my third bath that I undid the rope of my hair. My hair was my pride. It was the only possession that I really needed to survive. Sure, I needed food and water and weapons. But I needed my hair in a way that I knew was far beyond me.

In maybe ten years I would have to cut it to prevent walking on it. I unraveled my hair and soaked it in the water. Flower petals drifted over my naked body and the smell of oils filled my nose. I fell asleep happily.

I covered his prune-like body with three robes the woman had provided me. I slipped on the bath slippers and poked my head out the door. A young girl, perhaps twelve stopped at my command.

"I need silk wraps for my legs and a soft blouse. I'll also need some perfumes and oils in my room."

She looked slightly surprised at first, though now she was nodding. "I will also want a warm body tonight for which I am willing to pay well for a pretty face." She blushed. Her eyes would not meet mine and she assured me that she would do what she could. I explained where she could find me and set off to rest some more.

My room was clean and I rolled gleefully on my mats. My clean hair spread over my body like a giant feather. I slept again until I heard a knock at my door. An ugly woman stood outside my room with my perfumes, oils, and clothes. I was already unsatisfied with this woman as a bedmate, but she deposited the goods by my mats and left.

I walked around the room exploring and I found a small mirror. I looked like myself, perhaps a little thinner than the last time I had looked in a mirror. My nose looked smaller too, but perhaps that was only in proportion to my big lips. Everytime I saw myself, I looked a little different. I was now a completely different person than I was when I had first began wandering, inside and out.

I held up the blouse to my chest. It looked too large, but since I didn't anticipate any fights, I didn't need a good fit. That was the point of the skirt. I liked pampering myself when I was in a town. Once I had both on, I grew interested in myself. My hair glowed from the rescue from dirt, and it fell around my intensely tight muscled arms. They of course were hidden by the sleeves of the gown. The skirt allowed air to thighs that had been strangled in dirt for so long.

With all my fineries, I set out to patch up the rags formerly pants. I pulled out my needle kit. I had just settled onto my mats with threads and needle in hand, when another knock came at my door. My body hummed with life in anticipation of a woman beneath my fingertips. I set my pants next to me and smiled at the door, waiting.

When the door finally slid to the side, I got a look at the woman. The prostitute they had sent me was a fourteen or fifteen year old boy with large, brown eyes that shone out from chopped up hair and dull, natural colored rags. After I noticed his persecuted eyes, I noticed his arm. The boy only had one arm. His sleeve covered his left arm, but his shirt had been torn at the shoulder of his right arm. It was a stub on display. I had maimed a decent amount of creatures, man and animal, and so his stub did not sicken me. But it did sadden me.

He looked scared. I was feeling much the same way as I did before I killed. I wanted to let the prey go. But, why had they sent me a boy? Had they assumed I was a woman or a pervert? I imagined it would make me happy to hear that they had mistook me for a woman. Surely, I was built more solidly than a woman. Still, it was a compliment, since they were so beautiful. Yet, if they thought that I was a pervert, did that mean I looked like a pervert? I felt slightly bothered, though I didn't know why.

"Come boy, and help me with my sewing." Instantly, the fear I had seen in his eyes became replaced with indignation.

"I wasn't sent here to do woman's work." His hands were clenched and he looked genuinely insulted.

"What were you sent here for then?"

He closed his eyes and his hands. He seemed to be trying to keep the blush on his cheeks from spreading. I knew the right things to say during an argument. It did quiet him. But he surprised me by saying "I'm here to make money."

I smiled. "I will pay you well for whatever you do in my room." His eyes reopened in surprise and we studied each other, sizing the other one up. He nodded and walked over to sit on the mats beside me.

"What do you want me to do?" he asked angrily. Let me pity you, I thought. I wasn't used to placing myself in others' sandals. I showed him how to stitch up the pants I handed him. I was impressed that he could sew one handed. Sitting together, we sewed. I wasn't sure why it felt good. Every once in a while I felt him looking at me but I never looked at him.

"Why is it you find my face so interesting?"

"I was trying to see a scar."

I wiggled my toes and remembered I had yet to soak them in oils. "A scar?" I knew I had plenty. I had one terrible one across my shoulder. The rest were smaller, but eternal.

"there was a woman who came here, who talked like a man. She had a scar across her neck. It's why she spoke so deep. I wanted to see if you had one."

I shook my head. "No, I am not a woman."

He only stopped sewing and when he started again, he said "It's hard to tell."

"It's the loose clothes, when I am naked it is apparent. I am more muscular than any woman I have ever met."

Perhaps that is the only difference." My eyes narrowed and I looked at him. And he was looking back at me. He wanted to bait me. Maybe he just wanted attention."

"What is your name?" I asked.

"Karumu. What's yours?"

"Tsumekando Rakoshi, wanderer. Can I ask your family name?" I wasn't quite sure shy it was important to know. I remembered faces that would be linked to different sexual feelings. Every feeling was different. Yet, every woman was unnamed. Not that they hadn't told me, they probably had, but their names would never be as important to me as their faces. Their plain faces turned beautiful by glowing release. And Karumu was beautiful already.

"Jama."

"Jama?"

"Yes." he shrugged. "I'm an orphan." It was a rush! Something to add to my sympathy. A thrill to feel sad for someone else.

"And a great learner." I pointed to the nicely stitched pants he held. "I think you may become a better sewer than me."

He couldn't figure out if he had been insulted or not. It was obvious since I sewed that I didn't find it "woman's work". But, it was something he had been told probably since birth. Proving that an example is worth more than words, he half smiled. "I think I'm done already."

I smiled back, catching his eyes with mine. "I still have a bit more, you're quick." This time he did smile fully. Such pride in the raggedy orphan boy.

I laughed. "Why don't you finish this one?" He nodded and took the pants from. He focused his attention on the sewing. My body was beginning to feel warm from the heat of his leg. It was strange feeling such abnormal desires at once. I wanted to watch him sew forever, and I wanted to lick his entire body. My hand touched his leg. He froze. I didn't want him afraid, that wouldn't work for my sex drive.

"I swear to you," I whispered. "It won't be unpleasant and you'll have more money than you've ever had." I couldn't bring myself to look at him. But my hand kept going towards it's destination.

"Please, keep sewing." An odd request, but I was sure he had heard of worse things, sharing a home with whores. He obeyed.

He didn't stop sewing when I caressed his cock to erection. Nor when I covered it with my mouth, bathing in his smell. I wasn't doing what I really wanted to do. I wanted to fondle the remains of his arm. I had never touched the lonely area of a handicapped person. I longed to lick it like I did his balls. I wanted that area to not be alone anymore.

Though most of his concentration was poured into the sewing, I knew he was enjoying my feasting. I could feel the slight clenching and unclenching of his ass cheeks. Once again, shock came to him when I wormed my hand underneath him in search of the clenched area. He stopped sewing as I moved the cheeks apart with thumb and pinky, stroking his sensitive skin with my middle finger.

He was even more apprehensive when I wiggled in a quarter of an inch. But I kept my hand still as my mouth continued on his semi-hard cock. Soon, I spied that he had continued sewing. It was hard enough now that I could taste his juices. It was heaven.

Those weren't the only juices I wanted. I wanted to taste his tongue, yet it was so arousing that he could remain sewing. My finger was hot but I pushed it just a bit further into him. He stopped sewing again and to compensate I dove my mouth over his cock, my nose nudging his balls.

"Eek," he squeaked. He made more luscious sounds as my lips did laps from balls to tip. I could feel my lower half twitch with the nearness of my orgasm. All I need was him to give into the feelings.

The sewing forgotten, Karumu squirmed and gasped. With my free hand, I stroked his needy balls. The perfect size for desperate fingers. My eyes slammed shut as I felt through the helpless bucking, through body movement and sounds, his release. The instant he sprayed inside my mouth, I shuddered head to toe with my own orgasm. Each shove of his hips emulating my won, with the waves washing into my mouth in synch with my own spurting against the bed.

I sighed and lay on his thigh. It had been wonderful. This was the best part of my visits to the cities. One of the things that kept me coming back year after year. I smiled. Now I could go to sleep. I would recover all the lost hours of sleep that came from living in wilderness.

When I stretched out to put my head by his, I was surprised and annoyed to find him crying. His beautiful wet eyes would not interact with mine. He wiped at them with rounded fists. I was torn. I wanted to make him feel better and I wanted to sleep. I had insulted his manhood by being a man and pleasuring him. His tears were in response to my actions. Still, it was not my job to make him happy, it was his.

"Karumu, get water and a rag and wash me off. I don't want it to dry in my sleep."

"Yes," he said. With one sniffle, he got off the mats and went off to find my request. I kept my eyes closed but I had the impression that it was taking him longer because of the embarrassment of being naked.

Eventually, I did feel my skirt being taken off and I arched up to help him. The water felt good and it was gentle enough that it aroused me slightly. Not enough to give up the dark happiness that lay waiting for me behind my eyes. I felt little drops of pressure on my thigh. I opened my eyes to see what was doing to me. He was still crying and his tears were falling on my leg.

I sighed loudly. Well, there went that peaceful sleep. How could I sleep with his hurt feelings dampening me.

"Karumu, why must you bother me so!" He bit his lip and continued to wash and ring out the cloth.

"Did I break my promise? Was it unhappy?" He shook his head. "Did I harm or hurt you?" Again another shake of his head. I sat up and brought my face close to his. I put my hand on his soft cheek. "Then tell me how I have wrong you?"

"You are a man."

I followed him so far. "Yes, I am a man."

"And I'm a man," he concluded. That was the great argument. I knew what he meant of course, but I had a point of my own to make.

"Yes, you are a man."

His face was directed at the floor. "And I enjoyed you... touching me."

I smiled. I knew I had enjoyed it, but it made me happier to know that he had as well. "Did you like my mouth on you?"

He brought his chin to his chest in shame. "Yes..."

"Good," I announced, clapping my hands together. "What's the problem?"

He looked at me as if I was the biggest moron. It was so obvious what was wrong with two men pleasuring each other. "You are ignorant."

"I am open to new experiences," I corrected.

He threw the cloth into the water with a splash and stood up. "Idiot!" he shouted. "You know what I’m talking about! It's wrong and you pretend you don't feel it!"

I sat still for a full minute on my soaked sheets. My slight irritation had become a vibrating need to argue. "And you ignore the good in it.:

There is no good in it" He slammed his fist in the air.

His passion though misdirected excited me. No good in sex? It brought me to my knees in so many ways. I need it like good. His body alone crippled me with need. "Those are big words for a man who is naked," I lashed.

The color in his cheeks was a mixture of embarrassment and anger. I examined his small frame and the way his chest became his stomach in a way similarly curvy to a woman. His sweet body that I had just been sampling. His short arm that I desired so much. I felt guilty. I had no right to accuse him for the crimes of his city.

Karumu..." I whispered throatily. I was hard again from looking at him. My desires always unsatiated. He got the trapped prey look again. This time though I would be merciful. It was not in my nature to imprison others. He saw my lust, recognized the look on my face. Which made him all the more surprised when I pointed to my small bag of money by my weapon and told him to take the money he was owed.

As he walked over to the money, I rolled on my side so as to not look at him. My erection was sore and I felt unhappy. And still, I would let him go. "You may go now Jama, Karumu."

Rakoshi-sir?"

Yes?" I asked without looking.

Did you mean for me to take this much? I don't want to be accused of theft."

Smart boy. "You forgot, you also sewed for me." I closed my eyes and willed myself to sleep. I didn't but I also did not hear him leave. I supposed he felt as dissatisfied with our abrupt end as I was.

"Without naming someone other than yourself, tell me why it is wrong for me to put my mouth on you."

He sat on the mat behind my back. "I've always assumed it to be true."

I rolled towards him. He had been touching his segmented arm. I felt a flash of envy. I wanted to tough it. Instead, I touched his good arm. I just slid my fingertips up and down it. "With the way I live, learning new things is essential."

"What does it feel like to be alone in the wilderness at night?"

"It's not very relaxing. You have to sleep with one ear open. You have to be prepared to defend your life at all times. On the other hand, you are safer not trusting in others to protect you. Humans can't be trusted in situations of life or death. When I'm alone, I feel confident in my ability to survive."

He lay, warm body face up, next to me. The whole time my hand remained on his arm. "I tried to sleep on the streets once. I had had a bad beating and I was outraged. I wore the heaviest coat I had and went outside. Crazy drunks laughed at me. Strange boy-loving men..." he stopped and checked my expression. I nodded for him to continue.

"These men made comments to me and I just gave up. I wanted to be brave but I couldn't. I came back and my foster father laughed at me."

I understood how he felt. "I never sleep on the streets. I stick to the land. Humans give way to chaos easier than predictable animals.

"I want to be brave." I flipped over to watch him as I spoke.

"There is a difference between bravery and stupidity." My eyelids felt heavy even though I was aroused. I had slept with erections so long, that I was accustomed to it. I reached between my legs to adjust myself.

His eyes watched me carefully. "Are you still aroused?"

"Sometimes I go months without relief, it builds up."

His eyebrows came together. "Do you want me to..."

Such a nice gesture. If only I worked like that. I shook my head. "I don't work like that Karumu-boy. I require another's pleasure."

He looked questioningly at me. I hadn't told many people about my eccentricity. "Touch cannot make me orgasm. I need another person's orgasm."

His eyes grew wide as the depths of my problem sunk in. it was like a joke and I knew it. A lone wanderer dependant upon others.

"I'm sorry."

"I know. Now you pity me as I pity you."

His face seemed so determined suddenly that I was sure I had angered him again. Instead he said in the lowest voice "use your mouth on my again." I was thrilled. "Just, no finger this time please."

I nodded, happy to fulfill any requests. This time I could take more time. I licked at the little nipples. Then flicked my tongue into the crease of his armpit until he yelled out at me to stop. If it hadn't been for the fact that it tickled him, I would have tongued his whole armpit. Thought it was a small replacement for his cut arm. How, I wanted that remainder of arm, so delicate and frail. I passed it by though not wanting to insult his pride.

I used my hands more so I could lick the things I hadn't. His belly was soft and warm like his chest and legs. He giggled when I licked his toes. Damn ticklishness. I couldn't devour him if he was squeamish. Having found out my boundaries, I replaced my hand with my mouth.

He wasn't tense from apprehension this time. Which made him wriggly and loud. He enjoyed himself so much that it made me want to laugh. To think that a half an hour prior, he didn't believe in two men touching each other. And when we had both been relieve again, he lay happily against me.

"Karumu, you must clean me again," I commanded just before falling into a nice, cushy sleep. H must handled my gently, for I didn't wake up when he cleaned me.

I did wake up when his beautiful boy lips wrapped around my cock. It felt nice but no more than I would had he been sucking on my finger. I smiled.

"What a wonderful wake up Karumu-dear." His eyes smiled back at me. He slid his lips over the tip so that he could speak.

"Do you really believe I couldn't pleasure you like this?" He dipped out his tongue to demonstrate what he meant. It barely scraped the small hole.

"It bring me pleasure but not release." I was happy just feeling the attention on my skin. Karumu had a spark to him that I hadn't realized would be useful during sex. He actually growled. He wanted my orgasm, it seemed that he would rip it from me.

Does it need to be you who pleasures me?" he asked. I wasn't sure what he meant. He leaned his bare ass onto his ankles, his weight on his knees. His hand touched his cock, hard and moist. He began to stroke himself much the same way I had done to him. My insides moved with excited surprise.

"Yes," I said. It was working. He closed his eyes in enjoyment as his swift hand rocked his sensitive skin. I savored the look on his face. The hot determination to make me orgasm. I whined when sweat dripped from his forehead and ran down the left side of his face.

I sat forward like a mirror image and licked the sweat. It tasted similar to his semen which I longed to taste again. His mouth opened and I took the opportunity to lick his tongue. He made a terrible, frantic noise that made my hips flinch. I licked his cheek, stretched from his open mouth. It was damp and hot like we were.

"Ri...Koshee!" he cried as he exploded onto me. His spray hitting my cock as it let loose. As we orgasmed together, Karumu pressed his lips to mine. Neither of us sane enough to kiss, but hungry enough to try.

And once the flood of happiness and fluids ended, we curled up on the mats. I was sticky and uncaring as Karumu kissed my lips one last time before I slept like I was dead. The pleasant vibrations of my body, bidding farewell to my consciousness.

I dreamed of eating. I ate foods of all sizes and textures. There was a table filled with fish and curries and any type of food I had ever eaten. Perhaps there were imaginary foods there, because it was all too colorful to be real. I was growling fatter and fatter, but I wasn't about to stop eating.

When I woke up, I was ravenous. My stomach's complaints greeted me as I opened my eyes. I scanned for Karumu, but he had already left. I had been cleaned off. It was sort of a pity. I had enjoyed the feel of another man's semen on me. Though "man" would have been stretching it. It was hard to remember that Karumu was just a boy. Especially when he had done more for my cock that any prostitute I had ever paid for.

I sighed as I got up from the floor in search of some clothing. I wouldn't want to make worse the impression I had already made on the whores here. No naked man wandering the halls for dinner. The clothes we had sewn together were neatly folded beside my weapon. I noticed that his little bag of payment was gone. And just to be sure, I checked my own stash of money to make sure it wasn't missing. It was untouched like everything else in the room. Karumu was a good kid.

I put on a thick shirt good for cold nights, since I would be heading back out into winter. I chose pants white like my hair, though in much better shape. It would take hours to braid again. I was too hungry to wait hours to fix my hair. I hated going out with knots in the lovely floss. I decided that I would come back to my room again after dinner and fix it then. Perhaps I would take another bath.

I feasted on mediocre food while eyes attempted to solve the riddle of my gender. I sco0wled as I ate. It shut my stomach up, but it brought down my high spirits. When I finished I had decided against the second bath and was ready to braid my hair and go. But when I slid back the door, Karumu was sitting happily on my mats.

My feelings picked back up again and my mouth pulled up in a smile. "Boy, your energy may kill me or leave me with no money."

Karumu blushed. "No, I'm not here for that Rakoshi-sir." He spoke softly and I naturally tensed despite the low tones. He wanted something. Cities function off of selfish desires. One person's wants fed by another's wants and coupling to form a greater need. It's why I didn't stay in cities. I wasn't about to mate my wants to make baby wants.

"What are you here for?" I stood with my feet wide apart. Battle stance.

He swallowed visibly and chin held high said "I've come to leave with you."

I laughed. It wasn't the best way to handle such a proud little boy, but I was so surprised by his request that it had slipped out. His face tightened around his mouth. "I can't take a child along with me."

"I am not a child!"

My arms folded. I had the feeling that he had had this argument before. "Alright, more than a child. Regardless, I live alone."

"But I could help you! I'm a good fighter without a weapon! Imagine how good I could become with one!" My eyes rolled back in my head as he listed off all of the things that he could help me with. Half of them involved killing something. Talk about pent-up frustration.

"Karumu, you are very bright and undoubtedly sexy, but you would hinder my travels." I paced around him. I was the voice of reason. It all made sense why I couldn't take him and it seemed odd that he would think I would consent. And then I noticed a small bundle next to him on the opposite side I was on. He had already packed. Something moved inside me. I hoped it was breakfast and gave myself a quick poke in the stomach.

Then his big innocent brown eyes narrowed a little by the curving of his eyebrows. He put his fingers atop his bottom lip and in a deep manly voice said "You could have me anytime you wanted."

And my week spot. He had me in a place I didn't like to be. I imagined waking up in the morning after a sexy dream and being able to use his body to shake it off. All the times that I was so desperate with need, could be prevented with Karumu. He could be my sex toy. I tried to get a hold of myself. I took another look at Karumu who was looking like a king. So he could win that easily? I felt needy and pathetic. I had my pride as well.

"No," I said in the most commanding voice that I had. "Leave now, I will not discuss it further with you." He was so crushed. His head hung low as he got off my mats and slid back the door. He looked back at me as if I might change my mind. As if I really needed the burden of schooling a boy in my life. Once he was gone, I felt angry with myself. The idea of having my own personal love slave had been a nice one and now I was bracing against that slight hope vanishing.

I decided that I would have one more bath, the incident with Karumu leaving me feeling dirty. This time, I didn't enjoy it as much and was looking forward to packing my things.