Nikolas stood before Stefan's desk, his anger swelling, his hurt growing. All he wanted was to find out that this had all been a big misunderstanding. That he had not heard his uncle and his true love  in  sour duplicity. The tape had sent him spiraling into an abyss of dark red fury and he didn't want to be there . He would do anything to get out. "I received a tape in the mail!" he spit out. "It was a recording of a conversation between you and Gia..."

Stefan slowly stood. He carefully walked over the objects that were strewn about the floor. He stood in front of Nikolas, an aching fear in his hear. He found it difficult to breathe and yet he forced his lungs to push air through. "I know you're angry-"

"Shouldn't I be!" Nikolas roared. "Shouldn't I be angry that my uncle and my girlfriend have made a fool out of me! "

"Let me explain. We'll sit down and talk-"

"I don't want to sit. I want this to be a lie.  Oh God, can't this all just be a mistake," Nikolas wailed. His anger abandoned him and left him with pure ache. As he looked into Stefan's eyes, he realized that he was desperate to keep the only father he had ever had. He didn't want to be without him. When Stefan was "dead", Nikolas had been lost. That feeling of being without direction had scarred him and he didn't want to go back into the dark. "Tell me it's not true," he said frantically. "Tell me it's a trick, a lie."

Stefan breathed in deeply. He saw the hope in his nephew's eyes. The fleeting, irrational hope that they could both save themselves. "Nikolas, I wish I could-"

"No! Listen to me, I know was wrong when I barged in here. I was angry because of what I heard. I wasn't thinking. Now, I realize that you wouldn't have done that to me. To us. You love me! I know that. You wouldn't let me think you were dead. You knew how hard it was for me when Laura did the same thing. I KNOW you didn't do it. Tell me-tell me that the tape was fake..."

Stefan paled as desperate tears came to Nikolas' eyes. His hand shook as he reached out to touch his nephew's face. His voice was gravely as he spoke, "I do love you, Nikolas. You are my life. Everything I have ever done has been to protect you, to keep you safe from those who would want to harm you."

"NO! That's not what I want to hear! Please-"

"When I found out that Helena was plotting to kill me-"

"NO!" Nikolas screamed, his tears coming faster. "That's not what I want to hear. I know you didn't do it. Just tell me that it's a mistake. Please, I am begging you." He took Stefan's hand into own, holding it against his cheek. "I know you didn't...that you wouldn't."

"Nikolas, you're not listening to me. I want to tell you the truth. There are too many lies between us," Stefan replied gently.

Nikolas could see reality in Stefan's eyes. The truth. He didn't want to see it. He would rather be blind. He dropped to his knees before his uncle, and he wrapped his arms around the man's waist, just as he had done when he was a child. He pressed his face against Stefan's side. "All you have to do is tell me that  it's a lie. I will believe you. No matter what, if you tell me that it's all a lie, I will believe you. I know that I let you down. That I sided with Laura against you when we found out that Lucky was alive. I should have believed in you then, but I didn't. I betrayed you. But I can make it up to you. Whatever you say, I will believe you."

He sobbed noisily, his tears soaking the jacket of Stefan's black suit.

Stefan was flooded with shame. He had no doubt that he was the most hideous of monsters. He had broken Nikolas as no one else could. No one else had the power to destroy him so completely. Stefan was tempted. He wanted to lie because Nikolas wanted him to lie. He smoothed the boy's hair as he cried.

He closed his eyes, savoring what was probably the last contact he would have with Nikolas. Somehow, Stefan knew he wouldn't be able to lie. It was his duty to finally be honest. He owed his nephew that much. "Nikolas, it's true. The tape is not fabricated. That was my voice confessing to those crimes. That was Gia's voice doing the same."

"NO...oh please, NO!"

"Yes, it's all true, but let me explain. I need to tell you the reasons. Why I pretended to be dead-"

"NO!!!!!" Nikolas thundered as he ripped away from Stefan. He climbed to his feet, his eyes wild. "I'm not in the mood for explanations. I don't want to hear them!! I have three questions. You answer them!"

Stefan nodded his head, the slightest of tears finally brimming. "I will."

"Question number One: When exactly did you decide that I was a fool?"

"I have never thought of you as a fool! Not once."

"Really? Cause it sure seems that way. I'm the town's favorite idiot. The last one to know who his own father is. The last one to know who's really dead and who's just faking. The last one to know that his own girlfriend is a liar. Ha Ha..funny isn't it?"

Stefan tried to touch him, to comfort him, but Nikolas tensed. He held his shoulders stiffly, his hands clenched into fists. Stefan knew the kind of pain he must be in. He took a step back.

"Okay, I think we've answered that question. We'll move on.  What kind of information was Gia gathering for you? "

"When I was gone, she would just report on how you seemed. If you were okay."

"And you gave her money?"

"Yes."

"What about when you resurrected yourself? Why did you still need her?"

"She would tell me the same things as before. She would tell me your plans. Your mood. I used that information to fix our relationship. I needed you in my life, Nikolas. You are my life," Stefan sputtered. "Please-"

"Please what? Don't hate you for the rest of my life? It's too late for that. I hate you! I do...I despise you!!!!" Nikolas confessed in venomous condemnations. "I don't even want to look at you."

"I understand that you feel like that right now. This is new, you're trying to acclimate yourself-"

"I won't feel any differently tomorrow, Stefan. We don't have a relationship anymore," Nikolas erupted viciously. "I have one more question. What are you going to do when I tell Chloe the whole truth about how you kidnapped her, withheld her medicine and used her for your sick game against Helena? What are you going to do when she looks at you the same way I am now?"

The tears finally broke loose and they streaked a trail down Stefan's pale cheeks. He felt so very old. "You're going to tell her?"

"Look at you. You're still worried about yourself. What about Chloe? You've destroyed her life! But are you worried about that? Nah, of course not. You're worried about who's going to warm your bed when she leaves you."

"I love Chloe! I never meant for any of-"

"Save it! You know, Chloe and I have more in common than I thought. We have both been thoroughly poisoned by your sick twisted love. But it's over for me. I'm through."

"Nikolas, Please!"

"From this day on, you're  nothing to me. Pretty soon, I won't even care enough to hate you," Nikolas declared, turning on his heel and running from the room.

Stefan was left alone in the desolate silence of the prison he had made for himself.  He knew that without Nikolas' love, he would be nothing. And strangely, he knew that was exactly what he deserved. ~*~  ~*~  ~*~

Taggert walked down the hallway as if there were heavy weights attached to legs. He grimaced as the sound of Gia's voice rang through his head.

He had listened to his tape.

It had been a strange experience to listen to his sister incriminate herself. She and Stefan Cassadine? Why? That was all he could think. It didn't make much sense. And now, he had to go see Mac. He reached the police commissioner's office and rapped lightly on the door. Mac called for him to enter.

"You wanted to see me, Commissioner?"

"Yes," Mac started, "I'm taking you off the Quartermaine case."

"What! Why? That doesn't make any sense. I'm dedicated to finding the killer," Taggert protested.

"You might want to sit down. There has been a new development that I feel is a conflict of interest for you."

Taggert opened his mouth in surprise. How many tapes had been sent out? "You have the tape?"

"You know about the tape? Who told you?"

"No one had to tell me. I received one in the mail."

"Then you know perfectly well why I have to remove you. Gia is rapidly becoming a suspect."

"You can't actually think that my sister shot Emily! She is not a violent criminal. She certainly doesn't have any assault rifles lying around," Taggert said heatedly. "She would never do anything like that."

"How do you explain the evidence? We have the strand of thread-"

"Which we have yet to positively identify."

"We have. After some help from Dara, the lab technicians have positively identified the strand as synthetic braid hair manufactured in upstate New Jersey. It is only distributed in New Jersey and New York."

"You're trying to say that the synthetic hair is from my sister's braids? Is that your proof?"

"To continue, We have a man who can positively place Emily in Gia's apartment building the night of the murder. And then, we have the tape. A very intriguing conversation between Stefan Cassadine and your sister. He admits to faking his death and hiring her to spy on Nikolas. This is all information that neither of them would want to surface. Plus, we have the tail end of a conversation between Emily and Gia. Gia threatens Emily with bodily harm."

Taggert stood very still. He had to admit that the case against Gia was tightening up. But he knew that she didn't do it. He felt it deep inside. "Didn't you find it strange that both of those conversations were on the same tape? It seemed pretty choppy. I think she's being set up, Mac."

"I don't know what to think. For your sake, I hope you're right, but I have to follow the leads. And right now, everything leads right to Gia." ~*~  ~*~  ~*~

She found him staring out of the window. She came up behind him, gently lying her hand on his shoulder. "I saw Nikolas storm out of here a while ago. Did the two of you fight."

It was obvious that he had been crying when he spoke, his voice full of emotion. "I've lost him, Chloe."

She pulled him into an embrace, holding him. "You won't lose anything, Darling."

"And you!" he said hysterically, pulling her down on his lap. "I'm going to lose you, too. I don't know what I'll do when you leave."

Chloe smiled brightly. "I'm not going anywhere. I'll be with you always."

"NO! Not after...I have something I have to tell you."

She studied his eyes, seeing the despair and the fear that were clinging like darkened shields. "You have to tell me? I don't like the sound of that. Do you want to tell me...whatever it is?"

"No, not really."

"Then don't. If you don't want to tell me, then I don't really need to know, right?"

"I love you, Chloe," Stefan said quietly.

"I know you do. That's what matters. And I promise you, you won't lose anything. Nikolas will come around."

"I wish I had that kind of faith."

"I have enough faith for the both of us."  ~*~  ~*~  ~*~

End of chapter Nineteen, Please e-mail any feedback by clicking on the mailbox below :)

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