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Buffy Fanfic

NutMeg Index

Balance

By

NutMeg

*******************

Part 10

      Buffy looked down into her daughter's huge brown eyes and smiled. "You are something special. And soon your brother's going to be okay." She looked up at Riley, who was standing by the special bed in which Liam lay, tubes hooked into him and monitors hooked up to see how his liver and kidneys were functioning. Riley looked nervous, but resigned. Liam was quiet.

      Tara stood in front of the bed, a large ancient book open in her arms. She looked nervous, which was perfectly natural considering the life of Buffy's son was resting on her success. With a nod from Buffy, the witch began. "Acktha meirah sancta leiborum. Sisti eloribum firum cabristi. Yachsta Moirah Nei'hya soribum. Sitschwi hindenna uf unes listo pui asvori." The spell was long and complicated, and had to be repeated twice, with slight differences in pronunciation, in order to remove one set of DNA and replace it with another.

      The lights had been turned down, and no one made a sound as Tara chanted. Willow had cast a silence spell over the room, making the room soundproof to the noises from the hall and hospital beyond the door. For nearly half an hour the room was as still as concrete. Buffy knew things were never as still as death. Most of the dead beings she had met were very active.

      "Mishi palborum." Tara closed the book and looked up.

      "Did it work?" Buffy asked immediately.

      Tara took another step and was at the baby's side. She looked down at the child, apparently searching for something magically. At last the witch smiled. "He's fine."

      "Thank you," Riley hugged the blonde, who squirmed a little at the

display of gratitude.

      "You're welcome," she smiled as he put her down. Tara came over to Buffy's bedside. "The change is complete. They're both Angel's now. Willow wanted me to remind you."

      "Tell her I haven't forgotten," she replied in just as quiet a voice. "I can't ever thank you enough for saving Liam."

      Tara smiled and left quietly.

      "Does he look any different?" Buffy asked Riley, who was still staring down into the baby bed with a mixed expression of relief and sorrow.

      "Just the same," he replied. "I'm not sure if I expected him to still look like me, or to look like *him.* His hair looks a little lighter."

      "I'm sorry things turned out this way," Buffy told him sincerely. "But we would never have been happy in the life you had planned."

      Much to her surprise, Riley didn't flare up again. "You're right," he said quietly. "I haven't been able to stop thinking about that night in the restaurant since it happened, and all the things you said to me. At first, I wanted to deny it, find some way to blame hormones or *anything* on your outburst. But you didn't return the calls I made at the beginning, and you were never in the places I used to see you on campus. I had to start looking at it in a different way." He paused, and raised his head to meet her eyes. "I did love you Buffy. I still do. But you were right, and I had to accept it as much as I didn't want to. This wasn't your fault."

      "Thank you," Buffy smiled. She couldn't believe what she was hearing from Riley! When had he grown a brain between his ears?

      "It's Angel's."

      "What?"

      "He's a demon, a bad influence, and he was your first. That's a strong thing to hold over a person. I hope someday you're free of him. But at least I–"

      "Riley Finn I can't believe you!" the Slayer roared, causing Amber and Liam to both start crying loudly. "You haven't changed a bit! Still denying the truth rightin front of your face! If I hadn't–"

      "Am I interrupting?"

      "Doctor Santner," Buffy cut off immediately. "Just a problem with a rat." She bent down and kissed Amber's head. "Shhh, sweet one. It's all right. Here," she pulled back her pajamas. Soon the baby was quietly nursing. Liam however was still howling.

      Dorothy Santner crossed the room to the bed on wheels and looked in, amazed. "Well he certainly sounds better. The pediatrician wants me to bring him down for some more tests. Is that all right?"

      Buffy smiled tiredly. "Of course, Doctor. Whatever they can do would be more than I had hoped."

      The doctor took Liam from the room, leaving Buffy, Amber, and Riley alone again.

      Instead of picking up where Buffy had left off, Riley glanced at her with an expression Buffy couldn't read, and left.

      The exhausted Slayer looked down at her daughter. "At least you know who I am," she smiled. "I'm your mother, and that's all that matters to you. So simple. I love you."

*****

      Angel held up his hand, signaling the bartender for a refill. The man came over and took the empty bottle away, leaving a full one in its place. How could he have been so foolish as to think Buffy would want him back? She had someone who could give her normal things, like days at the beach, a happy home, and sex. She had children, and a man who loved her. She didn't need *him* anymore. Those kids weren't his. They were Riley's, and only Angel's by random mixed-up spell. The vampire upended the bottle in front of him.

      There had been a time when Angel would have been embarrassed to have been so totally inebriated, or to have been thought to be in such a state. Right now it didn't seem to matter much. Good Irish Whiskey was the only warmth he got these days.

      "Angel!"

      He nearly jumped out of his chair at the bar. Turning carefully, he winced when he caught site of who had found him. "Hey Cordy. Willow."

      "What the hell do you think you're doing here?" The brunette actress glared at him. "You're supposed to be at the hospital with Buffy. Not down in some Sunnydale hell hole drinking... my god!" She looked at the bottle, then looked at him suspiciously. "How many of these have you had?"

      Angel looked at the two women glaring at him. "Four."

      "Why?" Willow asked before Cordelia could continue her tirade.

      Slowly, because of the pain of the image– and the effect of the alcohol on his tongue– Angel told them about what he had seen. When he finished, he got the last response he expected.

      They laughed.

      "They didn't get back together," Willow finally managed. "They agreed to let Tara do the spell. Liam is just fine now. And fifty percent Irish vampire... sort of. Buffy was really upset when you didn't come back, so we came to find you."

      *I really am an idiot!* Angel wailed in silent misery. "Are you sure?"

      "Duh!" Cordelia sighed. "If you don't get back there she's going to take apart Sunnydale and probably most of southern California looking for you."

      "Then let's go," Angel replied, rising unsteadily to his feet. "Wait a moment," he reached out a hand, getting a firm grasp on the bar top until he was sure of his footing. It didn't do any good, and Cordelia and Willow caught him before he hit the floor.

      "Buffy's going to kill you," Cordelia sighed, huffing under his weight. "Or us for not finding you faster."

      "Angel," Willow pipped up. "When did you start drinking?"

      "Over three hundred years ago," he replied, laughing a little. *Damn, I had too much!* His vision swam a little and he tried not to laugh at everything they said, knowing that really *wasn't* as funny as the liquor was telling him it was.

      "You know what I meant!" the redhead replied.

      "Since I left, that's for sure," Cordelia shifted his weight on her shoulder as they led him out of the bar. "You smell like Doyle used to on a bad day."

      "I'll take that as a compliment," Angel replied glibly.

      "He really *is* drunk," Willow laughed. "And heavy."

      "Let's just get him back and let Buffy deal with him," Cordelia smiled. "I'd give anything to watch this."

      "Maybe we should take him home first," the witch said thoughtfully. "It's going to be dawn in a couple of hours, and he should probably sober up first. Or Buffy will *really* hurt him!"

      Angel tried to stagger onto his own feet again, but failed. "Did you know," he smiled drunkenly, "that my name was Liam?"

*****

      The clock on the stand across from Buffy's bed read 7am when Doctor Santner returned again with Liam. During the couple of hours they had been gone, Buffy had finally been able to catch a short nap. It wasn't nearly enough to make her feel energetic enough to get out of bed, but at least she didn't feel like she was going to pass out. *Chalk one up for Slayer strength and healing powers!* "How is he?" she asked, trying very hard to look concerned.

      Doctor Santner looked stunned. "Perfectly healthy."

      "Really?" Buffy's face lit up with an appropriate amount of joy. "Can I hold him?"

      "Of course," Dorothy smiled, taking the now un-attached-to-fifty-million-machines baby out of the little bed on wheels and carrying him over to Buffy, who had Amber curled up asleep at her side.

      Riley was right. Except for his hair being slightly lighter, the little boy looked exactly the same. "Hi Liam," she cooed. The little boy looked up at her and blew a couple of small bubbles as he looked into her eyes, much more responsive than before. *Thank the Powers for small miracles.* "What did the tests show?"

      "That's the strange thing," the doctor answered. "They show Liam to have different DNA. It matches Mister Angel's instead of Mister Finn's."

      "That's strange," Buffy pretended to be shocked. "Could it have been a mistake? The first time I mean?"

      "No," Dorothy shook her head. "There's no way to have mixed up DNA that we didn't have a sample of yet with some that we did. I can't explain it. Though you don't seem too upset about it."

      Buffy shrugged. "Either way, he's healthy and alive. As long as he is both of those things I don't care who a DNA test says he belongs to. At least it proves I did *not* sleep with two men in twenty-four hours." *Even if it isn't the man who said he *did* sleep with me.*

      Doctor Santner showed extreme intelligence by not pursuing the matter further. Instead she wheeled the bed over to where the second stood, ready to be used when Buffy felt like a break from her responsibility. "You have several people who've been waiting all night to see you. I told them you needed to rest." At Buffy's pleading expression she continued. "I also told them that a short visit wouldn't hurt, so long as no one came back for a second until this afternoon."

      Buffy's mood lightened considerably as Giles, Xander, Anya, and Joyce entered the room just as Dorothy was leaving. "Hi," she grinned. Joyce rushed over to see her grandchildren, who had been absent the last time she had come in to see her daughter.

      "They're perfect," Joyce exclaimed, gently run a finger down Liam's cheek. "Amber and Liam. My grandchildren. God do I feel old!"

      "You're not the only one," Giles smiled. "Well done, Buffy."

      "A compliment, Giles?" the Slayer smiled. "Perhaps I should have children more often."

      "Please no," Joyce laughed.

      "Sunnydale wouldn't survive," Giles agreed.

      "Not to mention the rest of us," Xander grinned. "You weren't exactly Miss Congeniality."

      Anya came forward and bent down to look at them. "So cute," she smiled. "This one's going to be trouble," she pointed at Liam. "As a former vengeance demon I know these things."

      "A lady-killer," Xander commented. "I'll have to teach him the way of the male when he gets older."

      "Which is made up of rituals consisting of nacho flavored corn chips and loud sports," Anya replied dryly. "And occasionally scratching genitalia and belching."

      "Xander is not getting anywhere *near* my son!" Buffy laughed. "Not unless I get *really* desperate for a babysitter."

      "I'll be available whenever you need one," Joyce smiled. "They are *my* grandchildren after all. So hand her over," she smiled, reaching out for Amber.

      Buffy smiled and obligingly handed her daughter to her mother. "Yes ma'am. I think she's full for now, but she might get hungry later."

      "I think I'll be able to tell if she gets hungry," Joyce replied. "I do have some experience with babies. Besides, you really should get some sleep."

      "What time is it?" the exhausted new mother asked. "I completely lost track of time."

      "Hardly surprising," Giles smiled from where he had been quietly standing. "I see your powers of observation have taken a holiday. It's nearly seven-thirty according to the clock." He point at the time piece right in front of her.

      Buffy squinted at the clock, then smiled. "I think you're right, oh all-knowing watcher. Where're Cordy and Willow?" She became suspicious as those around her exchanged glances. "And where's Angel?"

      "They went to get him," Joyce said after a moment. "But the sun will be up soon, so they probably made sure he got home safely. He'll be back tonight. But for now," she stood and carried a sleeping Amber over to one of the hospital baby beds and tucked her in. "It's time for everyone to get some sleep."

      "It has been a...long day," Buffy yawned. "Ooooh I ache."

      "No, giving birth isn't painful," Xander quipped with his usual sarcasm. "Of course you ache."

      "Thanks, I *so* needed that," the Slayer sighed. "Here, put him to bed for me?" she held out Liam.

      Xander stared down at the baby like he was an alien, or demon or something. With a look of disgust, Anya stepped over and took the baby in her arms. "Honestly, he won't bite." Sticking her tongue out at him she smiled down at the tiny boy. "Don't ever turn into a Xander," she warned.  "He's weird."

      "I'm weird?!" he yelped, following his lover as she tucked Liam into bed with surprising competency. "At least I'm human!"

      "Shhhh," Joyce shushed him.  "You'll wake the babies."

      "Sorry," he shrugged sheepishly, then pulled Anya away from where she was watching the sleeping infants with a look he knew too well. "Come on, Anya. We don't need one of those right now. Let's go home."

      The others were saved from having to hear Anya's response by the closing of the door. As Giles followed them, Joyce hugged her daughter. "I'm proud of you, Buffy. Even if I wasn't thrilled about all this, you've handled yourself very well."

      "Thanks, Mom," Buffy smiled tearily. "That means a lot. You'll be back later?"

      "After you get some sleep. Good night, Buffy." She shook her head. "I mean good morning."

*****

      Angel peaked nervously into Buffy's hospital room. Cordelia and Willow had put him to bed on the couch that morning, and he had been blessed to sleep through the worst of his hangover. What he hadn't been able to sleep through was the embarrassment of facing the two women when he awoke around five in the evening. He had showered, eaten, and come straight over to the hospital. Angel could only hope that Buffy hadn't been told about his binge the night before.

      The scene inside made his heart beat faster -metaphorically speaking. Buffy was propped up with even more pillows than before, with one infant in each arm. Both babies were feeding like starved piglets, and Buffy was beaming down at them with such a look of wonder and awe that Angel hated to

break the moment. Gently he tapped on the doorsill.

      Buffy looked up and smiled. "You haven't been staked," she joked. "I was beginning to wonder."

      If his blood had been flowing, Angel's face would have been bright red. Even the phantom feeling of blushing he felt seemed too real for Buffy to miss it. "It was a... long day," he smiled, coming slowly over to the bedside and taking his usual chair. He liked thinking of it as his *usual* chair.

      Buffy sniffed delicately. "Were you drunk?" she asked bluntly. "You smell awful."

      Angel averted his eyes.

      That was apparently all the answer Buffy needed. "Why?"

      "I saw you and Riley, hugging –"

      "Oh *that,*" Buffy snorted. "You always jump to conclusions don't you? He was scared for his son. Our son. I don't love him, but I don't hate him either."

      "I know," Angel cut her off gently. "Cordelia and Willow explained."

      "*They* were the ones who found you!" Buffy chuckled. "You poor thing."

      "Tell me about it," Angel laughed carefully. It didn't help his head.

      "Poor hung over Vampire," Buffy pouted playfully in her best baby-talk. "You winced," she explained a moment later.

      Angel nodded. "Couldn't be helped. So Liam is ours now?" He knew he was risking a lot by phrasing it that way, but he had to know how she felt.

      Buffy looked pained. "His blood is yours instead of Riley's. Just like Amber. Well, really it's DNA, not blood but--"

      "You're rambling," Angel pointed out quietly. 

      Buffy smiled. "I am. Can you blame me?"

      "Of course not," the vampire reached out and gently caressed her cheek with one hand. "Oh! I almost forgot." He reached into the pocket of his coat and dug out the box he had forgotten was in there. It was wrapped in plain red paper.

      "Amazing."

      "What?" he looked back up at her.

      Buffy giggled. "Big pockets. What is it?"

      "A shower gift," Angel set it down beside her. "From Faith."

      "Faith? How did she–"

      "I usually go to see her every week," he explained. "I'm her only visitor. I wrote her when I left to come up, so she'd know why I didn't visit."

      Buffy looked at the box with a mixture of suspicion and wonder. "I'd love to open it, but my hands are kind of occupied at the moment."

      Angel laughed. "You could charge rent," he commented as he picked up the box and gently removed the wrapping. Inside was a card, on top of something wrapped in tissue paper. The card had wolf pups on it. Angel angled the picture at Buffy so she could see it, then opened the card. "Hey B. I hear I'm gonna be an "auntie slayer." Cool. Hope the little ankle biters like the gift. I'd take it as a personal favor if you don't stake Angel. He's a good guy. Congrats. Faith."

      Buffy shuddered.

      "What? I think it's rather touching," Angel frowned. "Don't tell me you're still jealous?"

      "No!" the Slayer smiled. "It isn't that. It's just that I didn't know you could do impressions that well!"

      "Obviously better than I can sing," the vampire muttered.

      "What was that?"

      "Oh, nothing." Angel reached in and removed the tissue paper. Inside were two tiny black suede jackets with an S monogram and tiny sunglasses. He grinned. "Look at this," he held them up for Buffy's inspection.

      The Slayer's face went blank for a moment, then she burst out laughing. "How... Faith! They're cute."

      "We'll send her a picture of them on the kids," Angel smiled.

      "We?" Buffy looked askance at him. "Making plans already are we?"

      Angel swallowed. He wasn't sure if she was kidding or bothered by his accidental assumption. "I just thought it would be a nice gesture."

      "It would," she nodded, focusing on her newborn children once again.

      Angel had never seen her so fixated on anything. But then, it was probably good for that thing to be her children. She still looked tired. "Did you get any sleep today?"

      "Hmm?" she looked up. "Oh. Some, whenever they weren't checking on me, or the babies didn't need feeding. Probably five or six hours total."

      "Hardly enough," Angel shook his head. "Have you had dinner?"

      "Not yet," she shook her head. "I am hungry though."

      The vampire felt anger rising within him. How could they keep waking her up all day, and not feed her? Especially when she was feeding two other lives. Some way to aid recovery! He stood. "I'll be back."

      "Angel!" Buffy scowled. "Don't do anything stupid."

      He felt some of the tension melt away. "I won't." He smiled. "I'm just going to get you something to eat." He bent over and planted a tentative kiss on her forehead, then slipped out to find someone who could rectify the situation.

      Eventually he was directed downstairs to the cafeteria, with directions that she could have whatever she wanted. He just hoped he could remember her tastes, and hope they hadn't changed much. As he rounded the final corner he accidentally collided with someone. "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean–" he stopped dead when he saw who it was.

      "You're still here," Riley sneered.

      "So are you," Angel replied, feeling the hair on the back of his neck stir.

      Riley straightened his flannel shirt. "I came to see Buffy."

      "What a coincidence," the vampire said, not bothering to hide the sarcasm. "I won't keep you then. Excuse me while I get her dinner."

      "You do that, slave boy," Riley cracked. "Doing her bidding even after she ignores you for a year."

      Angel scoffed. "Actually she doesn't have any say in the issue. When I say eat, she eats."

      Riley looked stunned for a moment before regaining his composure. "How do you do that?" he asked suspiciously, though Angel could smell his curiosity.

      The vampire smiled. He was tempted to say *I know which battles to fight with her, and how to fight them.* Instead he settled for the more cryptic, "I know Buffy," and enjoyed the look of outrage that flooded Riley's face.

      "You think you're so superior," Riley growled stepping up almost nose-to-nose with him. "But just you remember who was able to give her this in the first place."

      "You mean who knocked her up?" Angel asked calmly, crossing his arms. He knew he was getting to the TA. "While she's still just a sophomore in college. The *Slayer.*"

      "I offered to marry her," Riley threw out his arm as if motioning at someone next to him. "I tried to take care of her, and help her, and–"

      "Control her," Angel finished. "You can't make Buffy do anything she doesn't want to."

      "That's not what you said earlier."

      "You can't make her do anything she doesn't *want* to," he reiterated. "You have to make Buffy realize what she needs to do sometimes. If it isn't necessary you'll never convince her."

      Riley shook his head. "I've tried that. It doesn't work."

      "Obviously you don't know her," Angel replied glibly. "Or don't know what's best for her."

      "What *you*?" Riley scoffed. "You left her. Broke her heart. She chose to be with me. I never forced her."

      "Then maybe *you* should have known better," Angel snapped. "Buffy isn't a child. She's a grown woman."

      "Well duh!" Riley mocked. "I kind of noticed that."

      "I mean in here," Angel tapped on the side of his head with one finger. "But there are some areas where she still has the innocence of a girl. Amazing considering who and what she is. She doesn't always think with her head. Usually she thinks with her heart."

      "If she thought with her heart she wouldn't have rejected my proposal."

      "Oh really?" Angel cocked his head in surprise. "Her head might have told her that. Married. No dishonor. Someone to look after the children while she did her Slaying. Their father. There are plenty of reasons she should have agreed to marry you."

      Now Riley looked clearly startled, but recovered quickly. "Exactly. So why didn't she?" 

      "Because her heart said no."

      "And how are you such an expert on her heart? You're the one who broke it!" the TA yelled.

      Angel moved forward, making the boy move back a step. "Her heart is stronger than you give her credit for. Buffy is also the most stubborn, independent woman that ever existed. She would never let anyone have control over her. She doesn't even like to compromise." 

      Riley glowered at him. They were almost the same height, but Angel still felt he was looking down at them. "You don't know what you're talking about!" he snapped.

      "Oh don't I?" Angel growled, trying *very* hard not to go into game face. "Talk to her yourself."

      "I will." Riley replied. Slipping around him carefully before vanishing around the corner.

      When he was gone, Angel couldn't help the broad grin that spread across his face. Turning he continued into the cafeteria.

*****

      *At last he's gone.* Buffy sighed in relief. Riley had been extremely upset and hurt when he'd stormed in earlier. Not that she could truly blame him. He hadn't even gotten the chance to talk because Doctor Santner had ordered all visitors home until the next morning. Buffy had been glad to get the break. It was nice to have time that was just her and the twins. They were already fast asleep in their beds. Dreaming little infant dreams.

      Turning ever so slowly, the Slayer rolled onto her side for the first time in days, feeling like she thought old people must, all creaky and tired. Pointing one toe she carefully stretched one leg to its full length, letting her muscles tense, and feeling her aching joints pop. When she released her leg relaxed, feeling much less painful. She repeated her stretch with the other leg. It was definitely going to be a while before she was back in shape enough to do any major slayage. Sagging back into the mattress, Buffy rubbed one hand absently over her stomach. It felt funny after getting used to the firm roundness that had been there until recently. Now she felt like a deflated balloon. It just wasn't fair to not be carrying children and still be too big to fit into her regular clothes! But it was worth it.

      Reaching out, she took the last apple slice from the tray on the bedside table. Angel had managed several of her favorite foods, including slices of apples and peaches, a peanut butter banana sandwich, and a dish of mint chip ice cream. It wasn't cookie dough fudge mint chip, but it was close enough. Enough to fill her up, but not enough to make her feel heavy. Buffy was still startled by the fact that she was tired enough to feel *heavier* than before the twins were born. Training was *not* going to be fun. Perhaps she could convince Giles to go easy on her for a bit. Chest shots would be seriously uncomfortable since her breasts were painfully sore with the new job of milk production.

      "Miss Summers?"

      Buffy looked up to find Andy -her male nurse- standing in the doorway with a large vase of red and white roses. She smiled. "Thank you."

      "Have a good night," he grinned, replacing the now empty tray with the flowers and slipping back out.

      There were two dozen roses. A perfect dozen of each color. But who were they from? Angel? Riley? Or possibly her friends, or another relative. She *did* have those after all. Maybe there was a clue. Sitting up, she swung her legs over the edge of the bed. Something she had only done twice in the last two days: for bathroom purposes and for them to clean up her bed after labor. It still hurt. A moment of inspection found a tiny card attached to the roses with a silk ribbon. Buffy carefully untied and opened it.

      *Red is for courage, and respect. White for reverence. You are an incredible person, more deserving of these feelings than any other: Friendship. Loyalty. Love. These lie within.*

      It was in Angel's flowing script. Within what? Curious, Buffy searched the stems again, not sure quite what she was looking for. All the time wondering about the meanings of the flowers. Angel had told her some of the meanings of flowers that had been used in courting when he was human. White roses stood also for innocence, purity, secrecy, and said 'you're heavenly.' Red roses said 'I Love You.' Together, they stood for unity. What struck her stunned was the other meaning of white roses: 'I'm worthy of you.'

      There. Something deep within the forest of thorny greens. Carefully Buffy removed the rose from the top, slid off the tiny paper envelope no longer than her thumb, and replaced the flower. The tiny envelope weighed more than she had expected. What could be inside? Carefully she opened it and slipped one finger inside. The object fell out, landing silently on the bedspread. The Slayer stared at it, almost afraid that she was hallucinating. Glinting in the low lamplight it shone. The design was clear; friendship, loyalty, love. A voice from the past echoed in her ear. *Wear it with the heart pointing towards you. It means you belong to somebody.*

* * * * *

11

      "Slow down! Oh oh... stop sign!" Buffy closed her eyes as the car slowed to a stop.

      "Relax!" Angel grinned, making the turn. "Considering the way *you*

drive you shouldn't be the one to talk!"

      "My babies are in this car," Buffy pouted, looking back over her

shoulder for the umpteenth time to check on the car seats in the back. Still there from what she could in the occasional streetlight. No dream. They weren't going to vanish, or fly out of the car. Liam was asleep. Amber was staring up at the stars.

      "Nothing is going to happen," the vampire reiterated. "We're almost

home."

      Buffy smiled and played with the string of the pendant hanging down

her shirt. Slowly she pulled it out and turned it about in her fingers. The ring glinted in the lamplight. "Angel?"

      "Hmm?"

      "Where did you find this?" She looked up at him.

      Angel glanced at her quickly. He looked surprised, unnerved, but a

little pleased to see her wearing it, even if it wasn't on her finger. "The mansion," he spoke at last.

      She had left it there after... *Not going to think about it.* "You

kept it."

      Angel flashed his cute insecurity smile that meant he didn't know

what to say.

      Buffy grinned. "Thank you."

      "You're welcome." His voice was low and slightly emotional.

      "Where's yours?"

      "It's..." he shuddered. "In hell."

      She winced. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to-"

      "It's okay," he placed one hand on hers. The one resting on her knee.

The buzz it sent through her was incredible. "I... it doesn't... it's behind me."

      "Really?" Amazing. "Does that mean I can ask about-"

      "No!... Thanks." He jumped slightly. "Someday soon. I promise."

      "Good. That means you'll be here for a while right?" She was almost

afraid to hear his answer.

      They stopped at a light, and Angel turned to face her. "Do you... want me?"

      Buffy smiled, worrying her bottom lip between her teeth and looking

away, then back again. "I want you in my life. Again. More than ever." There. She'd admitted it.

      For a moment Angel's face was completely unreadable, and she was afraid that she might have just scared him off again. Then something incredible happened. He broke out in a radiant smile. "I'll stay as long as you want me. As long as you need me. And the twins."

      "Green light."

      He leaned back, started. "What?"

      "Green light!" Buffy pointed up. "Sorry."

      Angel stepped on the gas. "Your grade report came in the mail today."

      "Oh, great. I'm sure my history final was a complete disaster," Buffy

leaned back into the seat.

      A cute smile perched on Angel's lips. "Just because you were having

contractions doesn't mean you're not capable of getting good grades. Giles told me you were really getting into your Slayer studies before you... well,

before this happened."

      "All right, Mr. Encouragement, how did I do?" she asked, her curiosity peaked.

      "You got an A in history."

      What?! "You're kidding!"

      "Of course not," the vampire chuckled. "You aced the final."

      "Wow! Does that give me bragging rights?"

      "You passed a final and had twins in natural childbirth. I'd say you

have all the bragging rights a woman could ever want," Angel replied. "Other than history, you got two more A's and two B's."

      "That's a record," Buffy grinned. "More A's than anything else."

      "And no C's," Angel pointed out. "Definitely a first."

      "Hey!" Buffy playfully punched him in the arm. "No need to be mean."

      "All right," he smiled as they pulled to a stop outside the apartment

complex. "You're castle, your majesty."

      "Thank you, milord," Buffy smiled, slipping into her best British

accent. Well it was close enough. "Now if only I fit into that old Halloween costume."

      Angel's hand gently pushed a strand of hair out of her face. "You

look wonderful."

      Buffy sat in wonder at the new Angel; so much more honest, open, and

cheerful than before. "Flirt," she chuckled, unbuckling her seatbelt. As she stood her muscles from the waist down groaned in protest. "Thank the PTB it's winter break. I don't think I could handle classes right now."

      "Then it's a good thing you don't have to," Angel closed his door and

began converting Liam's car seat into a baby carrier.

      Buffy did the same with Amber. The things were so convenient! Her little girl blinked up at her, that tiny mouth twitching slightly until it was almost smiling. "We're home," Buffy tickled her daughter's nose with her finger. She headed inside with Angel and Liam behind her, pulling her keys from her pocket as they went. Peace and quiet at-

      "Surprise!"

      Buffy jumped back from the open door, bumping into Angel as she did.

Her friends and family were crowded inside the apartment. "Okay, you all succeeded in making me jump out of my skin. Can I sit down now?"

      "Of course," her mother smiled, taking Amber's carrier. "I'll keep an

eye on my grandchildren if you don't mind." Angel followed her with Liam.

      Buffy sagged, exhausted onto the couch between Cordelia and Tara. "You guys are too much."

      "Anything for my bestest friend," Willow grinned, slipping a plate of

chocolate cake into Buffy's hands.

      "So you're trying to keep me cowsized right?" Buffy smiled as she

forked a bite of cake into her mouth. "Mmmm. I might like this new style of training. What do you call it, Sumo Slayer?"

      "Of course not," Xander chuckled, slipping into the chair beside the

couch. "Just a way to keep you out of commission so we can be slaying heroes a little longer. The job kinda grows on you."

      "So does chocolate cake," Buffy flicked a blob of icing at him with

her fork. As usual she had perfect aim, and it squished onto his nose, making everyone laugh. Buffy tried to be as mirthful as everyone around her, but she had the feeling it was going to be a very long evening.

*****

      "That's the plan?!"

      "Well, yeah," Willow shrunk back a little at the incredulous stare

Buffy was directing her way. "I know it sounds kind of simple, but-"

      "*Kind* of simple!" Buffy exploded. "We have an army of mind controlled demons being led by a species that's impervious to most weaponry, and the plan is to cast a spell that works like a broken record."

      "Sort of," Giles straightened his glasses. "The spell repeats itself

until it is canceled."

      "And what does it do?" Angel asked, clearly to keep Buffy from

exploding. Willow was much relieved. The vampire seemed to be inseparable from Buffy, as he had so long ago. It was kind of cute. Or at least, it would have been if not for the fact that Riley had insisted on showing up to fight. His eyes hadn't left them all evening, and his aura was a vibrant envious green.

      "It casts spells." Tara explained. "We cast this spell, and it will

continually cast the protection spell that makes weapons work against the Vei-rogk. That way Willow and I can cast other spells, instead of just focusing on the one."

      "Oh, I guess that makes sense." Buffy calmed down, leaning calmly

against Angel's shoulder. Willow could tell it was more of a natural movement than conscious, but Riley began to seethe even further. At least, the odd twisting of his face seemed to be an outward expression of seething. It was an interesting contrast to the new tranquility that shrouded Buffy when she wasn't in her usual state of nearly constant motion. It was a subtle, yet distinct change.

      "Good." Anya interjected. "Can we get this over with now? Frankly, I

like my friends raw... not extra crispy."

      "Bad mental image." Cordelia cringed. Willow had to agree. It brought

to mind the image of Xander in that breading stuff on a stick, or Giles in a greasy frying pan. Very creepy.

      "Well, I think that everything's been fully explained then," Giles

looked around the room, waiting as usual to see if any of them were going to ask any more questions. "Get some sleep. Tomorrow night is going to be very

stressful for all of us." His look fell on Buffy.

      "Oooh no. You can't keep me out of this!" She shook her head vehemently. "This is big. It's dangerous, and I'm the Slayer, so I get to say who kicks demon butt."

      "But, Buffy--" Wesley began.

      "But nothing," she snapped, eyes as sharp as stakes. "I kept in good

 

shape. I'm not risking anyone by being out there. I'm *going.*"

      "Who's going to watch Amber and Liam?" Angel asked softly, resting one hand tenderly on Buffy's shoulder. Willow watched the shoulder tense, then relax again. The gang had already had this argument a dozen times today.

      Buffy smiled up at him. Riley burned. "Mom will. And Riley."

      "Great," Willow cut in before Riley could make the objections so clearly painted on his face. "I think Tara and I'll go practice that spell some more. You can't be too ready." Grabbing Tara's hand she headed for the door. She definitely didn't want to be around when Riley exploded!

*****

      Buffy watched Willow leave, feeling slightly perplexed at her friend's jumpy behavior. Maybe she was just tense. Everyone was considering what they were going up against. Her heightened Slayer senses could feel the tension in the room like icicles hanging from the ceiling. Tension and... the

fowl sensation of angry disappointment. She looked at Riley as the meeting ended. He was trying very hard to hide his feelings, but Buffy had become excellent at reading him during their time together.

      Angel helped her up from the couch. "Ready to go home?"

      "Buffy, I need to talk to you."

      *Damn.* Buffy turned around.

      "Alone." Riley's voice was cold, but his expression was one of repressed annoyance.

      "I'll be in the car," Angel slipped out behind her. Sometimes he was too good at sensing situations, but she was very glad for it now. Giles had vanished upstairs and she was alone with Riley.

      *Stay cool.* She didn't bother to force a smile to her lips. "What do you want, Riley?"

      "*Now* you have the nerve to ask what I want?" The blonde ex-commando

practically cracked her eardrums. "You're going to need me in the battle, Buffy. Not babysitting."

      Was he really so blind? How could she have ever been with someone who could barely comprehend her thoughts? "These demons are smart, Riley. They'll do anything they can to keep me out of this fight." She laid one hand gently on his arm. "They *will* go after my babies. I'm sure of it. I need someone I can count on to protect them."

      Riley's expression softened to an abashed smile. "I'm sorry. I should

have trusted you." The smile faded. "The Initiative wants me back. For a mission in the South American rainforest. I can't tell you where."

      "What?" Disbelief filled her mind. Riley leaving? No, they weren't together anymore, but he had been so adamant about them being his children before Angel's. He'd been out of her life for months, then barged his way in, and now he was just leaving. Couldn't the damn man make up his mind! "Do you want to go?" It would make things easier if he left. She wouldn't have to deal with the constant rivalry between Riley and Angel that had *not* been lessened by the PTB's intervention. Dealing with them one at a time was hard enough!

      Before she could even squeak, Riley pulled her forward and clutched

her tightly. "I've known for a long time we weren't meant to be, but that doesn't mean that it doesn't hurt to leave. Oh God, Buffy. Ten months ago I had a girl I loved, and who liked me back. Nine months ago I thought I was going to have a child. Now I have neither. There's nothing keeping me here."

      Something warm and wet trickled down her cheek and Buffy pushed away

slightly. It didn't work. "I wish I could beg you to stay. They *were* ours once, but I can't, Riley. It wouldn't be fair to either of us and you know it. I don't love you."

      His head nodded, brushing softly against her hair. "I know you don't.

You never did. That's why I'm going. I can be useful to them."

      She pushed back again to meet his gaze. His grip loosened. *Thank God!*  "Please guard them. My mother can't do it alone. Spend some time with them before you go. How long is the mission?"

      "A couple of years," Riley pulled back. "But it's not forever. So

maybe I could..."

      "Visit?" She displaced another tear with one hand. The taste of salt

was strong in her mouth. "Maybe. Just call first, so you don't get accidentally staked." She managed a half-hearted smile.

      "Yes, ma'am." Riley picked up his jacket. "Just one thing. Your Mom's

not going to kill me if I go over there right?"

*****

      Willow swallowed the anxiety building in her throat. They'd done this

before. It wouldn't be hard to do now. Well... hopefully not.

      Tara sat across from her, quietly chanting in Latin. Candles sat on

every available surface. The scents of sandalwood and cinnamon mixed heavily in the air around them. Another minute and the preparations would be complete.

      She could hardly help but wonder how the others were faring. Buffy,

Angel, Cordelia, Wesley, Xander, and Giles would be doing most of the actual fighting. Anya stood outside their own door, weapons at the ready, in case

their plan had been anticipated by the Vei-rogk. They were in a vacant house, figuring that it would be much better to be attacked somewhere worthless than in their apartment. All possible wards and protection spells were up, so hopefully they were safe until they could finish the spell and then go join the fighting.

      "Ready?"

      She looked up to find Tara's eyes open. She was smiling nervously, her hands outstretched over the intricate design poured in sand on the floor between them.

      Willow took her hands. It was time to begin.

*****

      Buffy crept slowly around the side of the abandoned factory, keeping

behind the ragged shrubs, but away from the easily rustled wild brush behind her. This was not the time to make a mistake and– contrary to what she had led everyone to believe– she wasn't quite as in tip-top form as she could have wished. Angel was the only one aware of what she was and was not capable of as they had done a workout together that morning. He also knew she was in better shape than most new moms.

      Something moved behind her, but from the tread of footsteps Buffy could tell it was Cordelia. The brunette was dressed intelligently in sweat pants and a t-shirt and sneakers, something she rarely did, even in the time they'd been sharing apartment space. And *never* outside the apartment. Buffy didn't look much more stylish. She didn't fit into her favorite leather pants yet, so she was clad similarly in semi-loose fitting sweats and t-shirt. Now was not the time to worry about fashion.

      She could see the door now. Xander and Giles would be around the front now; Wesley and Angel entering from the roof. Surprise– and hopefully a little well done magic– was all the advantage they had against this army. 

Buffy's heart was pounding so hard she was amazed Cordelia didn't comment. It had been so long since she'd done her duty as the Slayer. It was just excitement, not fear, that made her edgy. Really. Just another night, another slay. Briefly she wondered how Riley and her Mom were faring.

      The stake in her hand began to glow a ripply pale green. It was starting.

*****

      Awkward didn't being to describe it. The tension was almost tangible in the silence. If the attack didn't come soon he might explode. It was so early in the evening. Just barely dark. Could he survive an entire night like this?

      "Tea?"

      Riley jumped. "Thank you, Mrs. Summers." He took the cup she offered

and sipped slowly. Avoiding conversation for another few precious seconds. He kept his eyes riveted on the tiny infants asleep in the playpen between him and Buffy's mother. They were so adorable. He wished they had stayed his. Maybe he and Buffy could have made it work... for them. And maybe, later, for themselves as well. He could have loved enough for both of them. Sure he could. Maybe.

      "Riley," Joyce's voice caused him to finally meet her eyes. She was

looking at him intently. "It's not your fault."

      It had begun. "That Buffy has children, or that I lost her?"

      Joyce smiled in a way Riley could only call "motherly." "That you and

Buffy weren't able to work things out. Not that I'm happy about you impregnating my daughter."

      She made it sound so... irresponsible. Riley felt him ears warm. "Did

she tell you what happened?"

      "Yes." She sipped. "Liam would have died. You were very selfless."

      Selfless? He wanted to split Angel open from nose to ankles, to steal

Buffy away and keep her locked up in a palace fit for a queen. Full of daylight. "You're being kind. I know–"

      "Shut up for a minute."

      He figured it would be wise to do as she said.

      "That was Buffy's word," Joyce continued. "Not mine. You made a major

sacrifice."

      "Yeah, it was hardly a sacrifice for Buffy to make Angel their father."

      Joyce frowned. Whether about Angel, or something he had said, Riley

couldn't be sure. "How much has Buffy told you about Angel?"

      "How much has she told *you?*" Riley replied. As much as he might love to cause problems for the vampire, he couldn't do that to Buffy.

      She smiled. "Touche. It took me a while, but I finally got most of the story out of Buffy. It was...difficult...for me to *believe* most of it at first." She paused, as if debating whether or not to continue. "But I know now how she felt about Angel. What happened between them. So many things I didn't know about my own daughter. And while I don't know yet if I can like him with her, he's been everything for her the past month. It's Buffy's life."

      *I still don't believe half of it.* Riley just nodded, not trusting

himself to speak.

      "You were exactly what I hoped she'd find." Joyce looked at him

intently. "Where were you when she was fifteen anyway?"

      "Iowa."

*****

      "Duck Wesley!" Angel called out, blocking a demon of his own as he spun behind the aging support beam. The poof sound behind him was knowledge enough that Wesley's stake had hit home. A moment later the Brit was beside

him, panting.

      "What now?" Wesley asked.

      Angel glanced quickly around the room. Across the expanse of surging

demon flesh he could hear the thuds of kicks, and see the occasional spout of vampire dust. There. A flash of blond fury. *Thank God she's alive.* If they lived through this, he'd spend every Sunday for the rest of eternity

in church. Well, when there wasn't a likelihood of his being accidentally soaked in holy water, or giving himself a way by burning at the touch of a

cross. "That way." He pointed toward a large door guarded by large slimy demons. The Vei-rogk had retreated in there at the very beginning of the fight. The vampire looked down at the axe, glowing green in his hands. He hoped Willow's spell didn't fail on them now.

*****

      *I'm dead!* Xander heard himself slam into the wall before the force sent his breath gushing from his lungs. *No more pizza. No more Scooby stuff. No more sex... oh man!* Belatedly, he realized that the pain was still there. The sounds of battle going on around him. He opened his eyes.

      "You could be of some service," Giles gasped, staking a vampire as it

lunged at them. "It would be better than thanks, actually."

      "Right. Sure." Xander looked around for his weapon. Lacking one, he

grabbed the nearest splintered board and, wincing as he scrambled up next to the ex-Watcher, went Babe Ruth on the vampires nearest to him. They had to

get to the Vei-rogk, or this might be the end of things as he knew it. And he liked having his own place and his own girl!...oh, and friends. Those were nice too. Especially Slayers and witches.

*****

      "Anything else we need to do?" Willow asked, placing the ziplock of

purple magic sand in her backpack.

      "Nope. That should hold for at least a couple of hours," Tara replied.

      "Great." Willow might have smiled, but the situation was definitely

not smile-worthy. The only thing that could break the spell now was if both she and Tara lost their concentration on the repeating spell. It required a slight flow of magic energy from both casters to continue functioning. Something they'd have to work on before they did it again. Hopefully there would be a next time. "Let's go join the battle then." She reached back into her bag and pulled out a couple of stakes, handing one to Tara. "I have one for–"

      The door slammed, cutting her off as she jumped and spun. Anya was

panting, wide-eyed. "Stake, now. Please. Or forget the stake. Swords would be good. Or magic. Even better."

      "What's wrong?" Tara frowned.

      The door surged open behind Anya, who grabbed the stake out of Willow's hand and ducked behind the two witches. "Them!" she pointed at a motley mix of vampires and demons.

      Willow pulled the third stake out of her back. This was bad. Very bad.

*****

      "Hi Amber," Riley cooed softly at the tiny baby in his arms. Her bright eyes blinked up at him silently. Quite the contrast to the howls he'd been getting minutes before. "You're much cuter when you're not throwing a fit you know."

      "And much sweeter smelling," Joyce smiled. "Never changed a diaper

before have you?"

      He shook his head. "No. It's a...unique experience."

      "Only the first dozen times," Buffy's mother replied, standing with

Liam in her own embrace. "Buffy fed them right before she left. It was about time for this anyway."

      "What comes next?" he asked as Amber squirmed, then yawned.

      "Bed time," Joyce told him, walking over to the playpen. "Eight o'clock on the button. If we're lucky they'll sleep through the night, and by the time they wake up everything will be back to normal."

      Something clattered in the kitchen.

      "It's me."

      "Spike?" Riley stood, handing Amber off to her grandmother.

      "Yeah, it's me." Came the vampire's voice. "The Slayer sent me to help protect the place. But I seem to have been uninvited. I brought some help. Some other chip-buddies."

      Joyce gave Riley a questioning look. He sighed. "How do we know we can trust you? It's not like you've been much of a friend lately."

      "Bite me."

      "Isn't that your department?" Riley snapped.

      "Oh, let them in." Joyce said quietly. "He's never been any trouble

here. Come on in," she called.

      Riley tensed as the door squeaked open and Spike entered the room

clustered with several other vampires. Spike's head was down, refusing to meet Riley's eyes. "I'm sorry," he mumbled as the other vampires attacked. Only as he stabbed the first did Riley notice the blond vampire's hands were

tied behind him. "Run!" He shoved Joyce toward the playpen. "Take them and go."

      "Where?" Joyce swept Liam back up next to Amber.

      "Anywhere!" Riley ducked a swing and stabbed upwards. There were a

lot of them. "Someplace they need inviting!" *And hurry.* He focused on the swarm of bloodsuckers as they dove at him. He heard the front door slam behind  Joyce and did his best to keep the vampires from going after her. He

hoped she made it all right. Spike was sulking in the corner. "You could help you know!" Riley yelled.

      Spike flinched and looked away. His hands were bound with some serious chains, and now Riley could see they were also linked to a loose chain that connected his ankles, giving him just enough freedom to walk, in small steps.

      *Well, damn.* Riley ducked again, and felt pain as one vampire grazed

his shoulder with a knife. *Great, armed vampires.* And they clearly didn't have chips in their heads. Another stab of pain as an axe grazed his ribs. There were so many. Maybe more than he could handle alone. His ears shrieked as a lucky blow connected with his head. He staked another as he reeled forward. *Easy. Let it fade. Focus. God help Buffy, and protect the children.*

      The swarm attacked.

*****

      "Halt!" The voice echoed across the empty expanse. The demons paused,

to catch their breath. Angel watched them warily. They were fully encircled. The infant rays of the midwinter dawn trickled through the filthy windows far above, illuminating the empty factory in a musty haze.

      "What do you want?" Buffy asked loudly.

      Angel stood behind the Slayer, eyes sharp on the Vei-rogk council seated at the end of the empty room. His axe aimed even more sharply at the ring of demons that surrounded them. All the other vampires that had been there were dust. The pain in Angel's shoulders was enough evidence of that. That the PTB he wasn't a new vampire!

      The Vei-rogk seated in the center wore on odd robe that seemed to be

a mix of skins and feathers. Angel didn't want to know what *kind* of skins. "Your children," it croaked with the heavy accent Buffy had described. "They are our mas'kesh."

      "Your *what?" Cordelia interjected. "That sounds gross."

      The Vei-rogk's apparent leader glared at her in annoyance. "They are

abominations. Children of the Slayer and puny half-demon. They are not to live in this realm."

      Buffy was shaking with the rage Angel could feel coming off of her in

waves. He placed one hand on her shoulder. *Steady, love.* "What do you want with them?" He asked aloud.

      "They must join us or die."

      That seemed fairly clear. The demon's grasp of English was very good.

Angel forced his own demon down, but his hands twitched around the axe handle.

      "Over my dead body," Buffy growled. The old cliche seemed oddly appropriate for the moment.

      The Vei-rogk laughed. It was an odd sound. Like sick flamingos crossed with water buffalo. "That was general idea."

      Buffy stepped forward threateningly, then stopped suddenly. Angel was

about to ask her what was wrong, when he noticed it too. Their weapons were sputtering, flashing green; weakening. Then, they stopped.

      "Perfect!" Cordelia's voice echoed across the large empty hall.

      "Shit."

      "Buffy?!" Angel glanced down at her, a bit stunned. He'd never heard her use language before. Which, considering teenagers of the current period, he was even more amazed that he hadn't.

      The Slayer stepped forward. "You dare to come to my town. To beat up

my friends. To make my pregnancy a living *hell.* And now you want to take my children and make them some sort of evil scourges, wanted in several

dimensions for heinous crimes. I don't *think* so. And I don't *need* magic to defeat you." She through down the now fairly useless stake. "I can use

something a bit more mundane than that."

      Angel watch as Buffy lifted her crossbow, aiming above the heads of

the Vei-rogk. He looked up, wondering what she could possibly be planning. Then he knew. The pipe above their heads was one he had learned to recognize from his years wandering under cities and through factories. This part of

the building was an old factory. The pipe likely leading to a freezer unit of some kind. Oh he hoped there was still something in it.

      The arrow loaded on Buffy's crossbow had an unusually large head. It

flew straight, and slashed across the pipe, sending a spurt of icy vapor down on the demons.

      The shriek that went up was the most hideous sound Angel had ever

experienced outside of Hell. Hands hit ears in a futile attempt to keep out the sound that rose far beyond the range of normal hearing, beyond ears themselves.

*****

      Buffy slowly removed her hands from her head and looked up at the Vei-

rogk. They were frozen, solid, cracking.

      "Nice move." Xander commented, his voice droll. "How did you know that was there?"

      "Actually," she admitted. "I was hoping for a water pipe. A flood would have been a nice distraction."

      "It's not over quite yet," Giles pointed out.

      Indeed, the demons around them had also recovered, and weren't wasting any time. As they came forward, the Slayer dove for her stake, the last weapon she had available. Her leg twinged from an earlier wound, and her whole body  ached from lack of conditioning. Now was *not* the time to lose it.

      She attacked. Losing Angel quickly in the all out brawl that sprang

up about her. Occasionally she heard human shouts, of victory or pain she couldn't be sure, and hoped that her friends were all alive. What had happened to Willow, Tara, and Anya? Why had the spell faltered? Block. Stab. She moved forward through the demons, wooden stake inflicting as much damage as any other weapon might have in a weaker opponent.

      Across the room she noticed a blur of human color skin and then a chorus of red-heads accompanied by a large blond male. The cavalry had arrived. Changing direction, Buffy hacked her way towards them. Wesley flashed by at her right. Cordelia and Giles at her right.

      A hand grabbed her shoulder, and Buffy spun, stabbing upward, slamming her stake into the heart of... a vampire. In a flash of evil face and blond hair, he vanished. Buffy blinked. She had stabbed *him.* *Oh, dear God!*

*********************

Part 12

      "I staked him!"

      Angel spun around just in time to catch Buffy as she collapsed into his arms, sobbing frantically. He had held her this way before. Her words echoed through his mind. *I'll never forget. I'll never forget.* He forced them back. Now was not the time. "Staked who?"

      "He....vampire...oh god!" Buffy clutched him tightly around the waist.

      "It's all right, Buffy," he stroked her hair. "It's all over."

      "No," she looked up, meeting his eyes. "He's dead."

      "Who?"

      "Riley."

      Angel felt seriously confused. "What do you mean? He's not even here."

      "I staked a vampire. He was blond."

      "Buffy, lots of vampires are blond," he hugged her close. "Maybe you got lucky and got Spike. Riley's with the twins and your mother."

      "No, no." The Slayer shook her head. "I'm sure it was him."

      "How?" Angel asked.

      "I...I don't know," she shook her head. "I'm so confused."

      "Hey, we did it!" Xander crowed, hobbling up behind them. "We're alive! We...what's wrong?"

      Angel motioned him to be quiet as the others straggled up behind him. Carefully he pushed disheveled blonde locks from Buffy's face. *Quiet now. She's had enough.* "You're tired, love. Let's

go home. Your mom and the babies and Riley are

there waiting for you."

      She nodded mutely as he gently led her out of the factory.

*****

      The walk home was excruciatingly silent for a victorious group of world-saving Scoobies. Buffy's tear streaked face was enough to sober even the exuberance of Xander. When Cordelia and Anya moved up to walk beside the Slayer, Willow slipped back to Angel's side. That goodness it had become overcast, or he might have been one pile of crisped bacon on the sidewalk.

      "What's wrong?" She asked the brooding vampire. Angel frowned. "She thinks she staked a vampire that looked like Riley."

      Her tongue froze in her mouth. Riley? But what did that mean for Joyce? Or the babies. "Angel," she whispered. "I hope she's wrong."

      Angel gave her a slightly reassuring smile. "If Riley were turned, I doubt we'd be seeing him til tomorrow night anyway. It takes time for vampires to rise."

      "Well we're about to find out," Willow replied as they neared Buffy's mother's house. The sight was not what one could have wished.

      "Mom!" Buffy broke away from them as they neared, running forward at a stumbling but still Slayer-speed pace. "Riley?!"

      "Oh, no." Cordelia's voice came from somewhere behind Willow.

      The door was ripped off its hinges. The windows smashed. The inside was no better. Furniture overturned. Pictures and vases smashed. But no bodies. No smell of death. Just the fine dust of

vampires, and smears of off-color demon blood that

left trails out the open kitchen door.

      Buffy was crouched in the middle of the floor, near the overturned couch. Angel was immediately beside her, consoling, whispering gently.

      Willow turned to Tara and Giles who were standing next to her. "We need to go find them. They could be anywhere."

      "Well, where would they have gone?" Tara asked. "Someplace safe right?"

      "So either a very public place," Giles nodded. "Where no demon would attack them."

      "Hard to find a place like that at night," Xander said, he and Anya joining them.

      "So someplace private." Anya smiled. "No vampires allowed."

      Cordelia slipped into the circle. "But someplace unexpected where demons wouldn't think to look."

      Willow had no idea where there might be someplace like that in Sunnydale. Apparently, neither did anyone else. At a loss, they spread out again, righting furniture and sweeping up the remains of vampires and demon goo. Eventually Angel managed to coax Buffy off the floor and onto the couch. The Slayer sniffled and took the cup of tea Wesley brought her, heavy on the milk and sugar.

      "Hello?" A voice echoed from the entryway.

      "Joyce?" Giles called back.

      A moment later, Buffy's mother appeared. In her arms were two blanketed bundles.

      "Mom!" Buffy flew from the couch, nearly tackling her mother with a hug and kissing both infants profusely. "Oh, my babies." She scooped Liam into her arms. "Where have you been?"

      "With me."

      Willow turned to see a blond figure standing behind Mrs. Summers.

      "Spike." Angel growled slightly.

      "Peaches," the younger vampire nodded.

      "We were attacked, and Riley held them off while I escaped. I took the car and headed toward the middle of town, but it was practically deserted."

      "They'd caught me off guard," Spike interjected. "And used me to get in the house. Captain Cornflake freed me and said if I didn't protect the lot he'd see to it I was sorry. Found `em and took `em to Giles' place. Figured they could hole up there til daylight."

      "And I'd love to know how you got into my place,"Giles frowned. "It was locked." Willow couldn't help but wonder that herself.

      "It's all right, Rupert," Joyce sagged down into a chair. "He only picked the lock. We made sure it was locked again when we left."

      Buffy returned to the couch. Liam was starting to fuss. "Oh dear," she sighed. "I think he's hungry."

      "It *has* been several hours," Joyce agreed. "Are you up for it?"

      Buffy smiled. "Do I have much of a choice?" Her smile faded. "Mom, where's Riley?" She looked from her mother to Spike. "Or perhaps I should be asking you."

      The platinum blond vampire suddenly looked rather uncomfortable under all the stares. Willow couldn't blame him. "I didn't see anything. But I heard a scream as I hauled ass out. Came back

after I got them settled. Found him dead on the floor. A few uglies came back and I split."

      "I did stake him!" Buffy wailed. "It's all my fault."

      "You mean they turned the bloody wanker?"  Spike's eyes went wide. "And you killed him. Oh *that's* rich. You really weren't fond of the bloke were you?"

      "Shut up, Spike," Giles glared at him. "But how did he rise so soon? It usually takes longer."

      All eyes were on Spike and Angel, since they were the local experts on vampires. Spike's eyes focused everywhere except on Buffy, whom he seemed to be avoiding. "I suppose you ought to know.

He'd been seeing vampires."

      "What do you mean *seeing?*" Cordelia asked, sounding very suspicious.

      "Hiring," Spike amended. "To suck his blood. For pleasure. It's oddly popular with humans for some reason. Find it erotic." He leered at them, in what Willow assumed was an attempt to seem tough.

      "Gross!" Cordelia shuddered. Willow definitely agreed.

      "Why would he do that?" Buffy looked horrified. "*How* could he?"

      "He was obsessed, ducks," Spike's leer was gone. He seemed almost sincerely concerned. "Wanted to know why you were so hot for a "hostile." It's not uncommon."

      "So, how would that have anything to do with his rising sooner?" Wesley asked.

      "He was...prepared, you could say," Spike continued. "Like a steak with a meat tenderizer. Steak cooks a bit faster, more tender; he'd had enough ladies drinking from him, it wasn't as much

of a shock to the system to become undead."

      "Umm...eww," Anya shook her head in distaste.

      "So Riley was turned, rose, and joined in the battle, all within twelve hours," Giles shook his head.

      "I didn't know who it was." Buffy's voice had dropped to almost a whisper. Willow could barely hear her. "I felt his hand, and I staked him."

      Willow sat down at her friend's side, opposite Angel. "There's nothing else you could have done, Buffy. You had to act quickly. It was battle. And don't even start about cursing him with a soul. That spell seems to be made especially for Angel."

      Said vampire hugged the drooping Slayer. "He won't suffer now, beloved. And if he didn't get to feed, than he might even be in heaven now."

      "I still feel guilty," she sighed. "But you're right."

      "Of course he is," Cordelia smiled. "Angel's usually right. Now come on. We all need to get some rest, and get bandaged up. And I, for one, could do with a *long* hot bubble bath."

      "Here, here," Wesley nodded heartily. "There's more tea in the kitchen."

      "I'll take a cup," Giles smiled.

      "Me too," Willow agreed. Even though she usually didn't drink it, it sounded restful and normal. Something she desperately needed right now. And it would be hot and soothing.

      "I've got the bandages," Cordelia pulled out the Scooby-prepared first aid kit. "You first, Harris."

      "Yes, ma'am," he sat quietly as she began to clean a slash on his leg, Anya hovering beside him.

      They really were quite a disheveled lot. Everyone bleeding from at least one place, save Joyce, Spike, and the twins. Hair was a hopeless cause, even among the men. Buffy was..... where was Buffy? She turned in time to see Angel coming around the corner from the stairs. "How is Buffy?"

      The vampire sighed. "She's exhausted. Right now she's feeding the twins. Then Joyce is making sure she gets some rest. No one should have to go through all this. Especially not so soon after..."He cut off, actually looking slightly embarrassed.

      He didn't need to finish the sentence. Willow had to admit she was amused that after everything the vampire had done, mentioning childbirth still went against his old Irish sensibilities. She nodded. "I know. Get some sleep, Angel. Buffy's going to want you when she wakes up."

      "Is she?" he snorted slightly. "She has her children, her mother, her friends. Riley is dead at her hand and she cries."

      "Because she's human." Willow reminded him gently. If Angel decided to leave now she was going to turn him into a rat. She was fairly certain she could actually do that now. "She loves you. Somehow whenever she really needs you you're here. If you leave now you'll break her heart....*again*."

      The dark man sighed. "You're right. When did you get so wise?"

      Willow felt her face redden at the complimentary question. "I've learned a lot about life the last couple of years."

      Angel smiled. "So have I."

      "Good," Willow nodded. *Thank the Powers that Be.* "Now shoo, scat, sleep! There's a cot in the basement you can use in case the sun comes up. I'll come get you when Buffy wakes up."

      "As you command, I obey," Angel's eyes flashed a little brighter, and Willow thought she was going to pass out in shock as he gave her a playful salute, then turned, and headed downstairs. Playful? Angel?! He really had changed, and definitely for the better.

      "Willow?" Wesley called from the kitchen. "Could you help me with some sandwiches?"

*****

      Angel slipped out of the bedroom where Buffy once again slept soundly, closing the door carefully so as not to wake her from much needed rest. Even with her Slayer strength and abilities, near-apocalyptic battles should not be fought practically on top of childbirth. Absently he wondered why that wasn't in any of the pregnancy and childbirth books he had borrowed from Buffy's bookshelf since his arrival in Sunnydale. Maybe he should write one. Not that future Slayers were likely to have the same situation. Angel himself had desperately wished for a book on "Handling and Care of the Pregnant Slayer: a How To Guide for the Ensouled Vampire." Alas, no such luck.

      He paused at the bottom of the stairs as he spotted the other ladies of the Scooby Gang deep in conversation. Cordelia was sprawled across the couch, freshly showered and wrist ace-bandaged. Willow sat cross-legged on the matching chair, a large book open in her lap, and Tara perched on the chair arm. Anya lounged on the floor with a pillow. The women all wore lose sweat pants and tops varying from t-shirts to tank tops. The dark red top on Willow was something he would have expected to see on Buffy, not the quiet young witch. But then, she wasn't so quiet or innocent anymore. They all stopped talking as he entered the room. "Should I leave?" he asked.

      "Oh no, we were just discussing you," Cordelia grinned. "I insist that you stay." She pulled her feet up enough to free one cushion of space at the end of the couch.

      Angel sat down, suddenly feeling far too much like a lab rat for his own comfort. Or a rare specimen of beetle. "Okay, what's going on?" He asked four expectant sets of eyes.

      "We need to discuss your situation," Willow stated simply.

      "Situation?"

      "Are you planning on staying here with Buffy or not?" Cordelia asked in a slightly annoyed voice. "Cause if not, I'm going to stake you right here."

      *What the?!* Angel sat back, stunned. He had avoided thinking about the inevitable questions that would arise, focusing only on Buffy and the babies, and the upcoming battles. But with those battles over.... "We... haven't discussed it," he admitted to his jury of college females.

      "But what do *you* want?" Anya piped up. "Cause I'm pretty sure Buffy would rather you stayed around. I might have to go ask for my powers back just to hurt you if we have to deal with her weeping all the time because you left. Of course, if you want to have sex with her you can't leave."

      The girl was even more unsubtle than Cordelia! Angel felt his face going a little red at the idea that the girls were grilling him about his most intimate plans. As for sex, that wasn't exactly an option, so why would the ex-demon be bringing it up? They were all staring at him, waiting for answers. He was trapped. "I don't know," Angel sighed. "I want her to be happy."

      "And that's a cop-out answer," Cordelia cut him off. "You always say things like that. All noncommital and avoiding the real question. You've never gotten over her, and you know it. One mention of her, or Sunnydale, and you'd go all dark and brooding and miserable on us in LA!"

      "All right, all right," Angel glared at his friend. "I admit it. Now what's this all about anyway?"

      "Because we need to know if there's a chance of you going all *grrrr* again anytime soon."

      Yes, Cordelia definitely still needed some work on tact. "I hardly think–"

      "Shut up for a minute," she interrupted again. "Listen to what Willow and Tara have to say."

      Angel turned his attention to the two witches. What was going on with these women today?!

      Willow smiled at him. "Tara and I have been working on a spell for some time now..."

      "Not really a spell," Tara interjected. "More of a...patch."

      "A continuation, or alteration, of the curse," Willow finished. "Basically, we think we can make your soul permanent."

      His soul? Was his shanshu to come from a spell? No, the PTB wouldn't do it this way. Though that had done many things in the past he didn't comprehend, especially the recent developments that had given him two children. Perhaps this was a partial reward of some kind. "How?" he asked, not really daring to hope.

      "We wrote a new part of the spell," Tara smiled.

      "Kind of like a patch for a hole," Willow nodded. "Only it will hold your soul inside you seamlessly. In theory."

      Of course in theory. "What would this involve?" Angel felt as though he should be holding his breath.

      Willow stopped smiling. "That's the tricky part. Unlike a real patch we can't just cast this over the existing spell. We have to *remove* the curse, and then re-curse you using the modified spell. Otherwise we can't be sure that it will stay."

      "Absolutely not." His heart was breaking, but he couldn't let them try. "That means letting Angelus out again. I can't risk that." "We already thought of that, smart ass," Cordelia sighed. "We'd chain you down *before* they remove the curse. And I'll be standing by, holy water and stake in hand just in case."

      "Oh, that makes me feel so much better," Angel snapped. But... it *was* worth it, wasn't it? The possibility of staying with Buffy, forever. Never having to worry about Angelus breaking free again, even if the demon still remained within him. Angelus would be trapped, imprisoned inside him. Angel. "I'll go along with it. But if things start to go wrong, promise me you'll re-curse me using the original spell. We know that one works."

      Willow nodded. "I promise. Buffy would probably kill me if we lost your soul forever."

      "If I didn't first," he replied, all seriousness. Somewhere in the back of his mind he knew they were fully aware of the risks, but that didn't make him any less protective. At times, Cordelia and Willow still seemed much like the children they had been when he first them. Anya and Tara were total enigmas to him. The idea that Willow was a lesbian still struck him as odd. Of course, that could also be his long ignored Catholic Irish upbringing banging at the little closet door in his head begging to be let out. "When were you hoping to do this?"

      "As soon as you're ready," Buffy's best friend smiled. "No reason to put it off. The sooner we do it, the sooner perfect happiness stops being synonymous with `bloody massacre.' I would much prefer having a happy best friend than destruction."

      "All right, then. We'll do it tonight." Doubt raged inside of him, but he forced it down. The opportunity might only come once. He couldn't be certain if this was the Powers at work, or not, but he couldn't take that chance.

      Now how was he ever going to tell Buffy?

*****

      "Is that tight enough?" Buffy asked, giving the chain one last tug. Angel was looking up at her with an expression that was either amused or frightened, possibly a bit of both. It was an odd expression.

      He nodded, pulling against it. "Perfect."

      The tone in his voice told her he was referring to more than just her ability to tie him down with chains. If circumstances had been different, this might even be amazingly kinky. She hadn't known how to respond to Angel's news that Willow might be able to permanently tie down his soul. He had asked if she wanted him around, as if he still couldn't comprehend that she was still in love with him. Not that she had told him that outright. Sometimes Buffy wasn't sure what she wanted, or what was best. But she knew that at least for right now, Angel was the best thing she and the twins could possibly have. And he deserved his soul, and the right to perfect happiness, even if it turned out to be with someone else in the distant future. So she told him yes.

      Stepping back, she nodded at Willow. "Done." Her best friend smiled encouragingly. "Are you ready, Angel?"

      Was it her imagination, or was Angel really terrified? Not that his face showed it, but Buffy could still sense him after all this time. Especially now, when he was so close, and had been with her almost constantly for weeks. She reached out and squeezed his hand to say *I'm here.* He smiled. She didn't need to vocalize her thoughts. At this moment, if only for a moment, she was sure he could hear them. *You mean the world to me. Please make it through this.*

      Angel nodded once. "I'm ready."

      Willow began to chant in a language Buffy could sort of tell was what the gypsy curse had been cast in. A simple reversal spell, Tara had explained earlier. In a minute the curse would be lifted.

      "Better step back," Cordelia warned, causing Anya to take a step back, holy water firmly in hand.

      "Right." Buffy had almost forgotten that part. She let loose Angel's hand and moved away, not taking her eyes from his. Yes, there was definitely fear in those dark brown orbs. Fear for her, and himself.

      As she watched, his eyes began to change. It was a subtle change on the outside, as they lost their softness. What assaulted the Slayer inside was as clear as August sunlight. *Angelus.*

      The vampire leered at her, fangs glistening and face transformed, testing the chains. "Very good children, is this little strip show just for me?"

      Cordelia glared at the demon. "No comments on the fashion, buddy. My don't we have a big ego this evening."

      "Hey, the little ham grew some backbone. Too bad you don't even have the acting skills of a dead cat."

      "Bite me," she snapped back. "You have to have a soul to appreciate true art."

      "Feisty too."

      Buffy watched the exchange in confusion. Since when had Cordelia and Angelus been on speaking terms? He was sending her Slayers senses into overdrive, waging a war with her feelings for Angel insider her, and it was all she could do not to stake him.

      Those eyes turned on her. Gone was the tender concern, the self- depreciating grin. She knew those eyes. "Hello, lover." Those eyes were hungry, dirty, and completely evil.

      "Don't call me that." Her heart shrank against her spine.

      He laughed coldly. "Relax, strumpet. You've been soiled by those less worthy than I. Imagine, letting some weakling human male paw and pant over you like some old bone. You deserve kings and emperors bowing at your feet."

      Buffy snorted. "Kings? Emperors? Even those are men. Unless you mean a ruler of darkness."

      "I could make you a queen for eternity."

      "Snake."

      The demon's grin was feral. "No. A dark angel."

      Buffy glared at him. It. "I wouldn't touch you."

      "But you have."

      "That was years ago. And that wasn't you."

      "We're one and the same, that whiner and I," Angelus smirked. "And it wasn't that long ago. I remember. Don't you? You came to me in the city of *angels,* and thanked me as I fucked you til you screamed. "

      "Shut up!" Buffy tossed a pillow at the vampire, who managed to avoid it with a twist of his head. "You're lying!"

      "Am I?" he leered. "I'm dismayed you don't remember. Cookie-dough- fudge-mint-chip *is* your favorite ice cream isn't it?"

      Buffy's mind raced. Angel had mentioned her favorite before, when they ran into each other – literally – in LA. But she had only admitted it then. How could he have really known?....he couldn't. It hadn't sounded like a guess then though, and it didn't now. Only in her dreams had they...but that had *never*... "I'll gut you like a pig if one more filthy word comes out of your mouth."

      "No you won't," the vampire chuckled. "Your precious Angel is still in here somewhere. And I know how fond you are of that soul, and the body of course. Mustn't forget the body. Licking ice cream from my chest like a trained puppy. Screwing like rabbits in a windowless apartment."

      "We never did that!" Had they? No, of course not. He was just trying to get to her. *And it's working damn it.*

      "Of course, you did," he replied. "And you didn't. All in one day that never happened. He stole it away from you, that sniveling soul. Never asked, just did it. Like everything else he ever did to you."

      Rage began to rise within her. Not just her own, but the rage of every slayer that ever came before her. The rage of the innocent murdered by this, and endless other demons. And most strongly, that of Angel's soul calling out to her from an endless sea of emptiness. "Enough!" she screamed. "Enough, you bastard!" The hot tears seared rivers in her cheeks, and scalded her eyes.

*****

      "Go to hell!"

      Cordelia stared as Buffy spun on her heal and ran from the room. She turned a cold glare back to the demon chained to Buffy's old bed. "You disgust me."

      "Perhaps someone should go after her?" Tara asked, clearly uncomfortable with the situation, and Angelus.

      "I'll do it," Cordelia handed the shy witch her holy water. "Don't listen to a word he says. He's a bastard in the truest sense of the word."

      "I'm touched that you think so highly of me," Angelus joked from the bed.

      "Just finish the spell," Cordelia told Willow and slipped out the door.

      The hallway was empty. Quickly Cordelia checked the upstairs rooms, seeing only the twins asleep in Joyce's room in their playpen, then slipped down to the first floor. Joyce was out getting more groceries to feed the colony that had set up in her house. Giles and Wesley were restocking magic supplies. Xander had gone out to get more bandages. The house was almost silent, except...

      Sniffling was coming from the kitchen.

      "Buffy?" She paused in the doorway, not wanting to intrude on the other woman. The Slayer sat at the kitchen table, clutching an empty coffee cup as if to crush it, which she most likely could if she truly wanted.

      "I hate him," Buffy finally replied. She was visibly shaken.

      "Trust me, you're not alone," Cordelia took that as an invitation to take the empty chair beside her.

      "His lies are just so horrible," the Slayer snapped. "And so ridiculous. I would remember something like that. Wouldn't I?"

      Cordelia looked at Buffy. They both knew that Angelus didn't really lie. He just told nasty perversions of the truth. And that was definitely one of them. It was time to come clean. "He wasn't lying. Not in the literal sense." "How could he not?" Buffy slammed the coffee cup down on the table. "We never had sex after my birthday. And Angel would have told me if he had the chance to be human."

      "Technically, he just did," Cordelia pointed out, prying the coffee cup loose and going over to the still warm coffee pot. "Just not in the nicest way." She handed the filled mug back to the Slayer, and poured one for herself. "You guys *did* get all, sweaty and personal the Thanksgiving you came to visit. Angel was made human by some regenerative demon blood that got into a cut on his hand. He had the day taken back because the oracles – this beings that talk for the PTB – said you'd die if he wasn't super strong to protect you. He told you after he'd made the deal."

      Buffy was staring at her, and with good reason. "How do you know this?"

      Cordelia took a long fortifying sip from her own coffee. "Angel told Doyle about it afterwards. He couldn't handle be the only one who ever knew the day happened. And Doyle told me about it later, as long as I promised not to tell you or anyone else. At this point that promise is rather void."

      "Why didn't he tell me?"

      *Great, here we go with the tears of self-involvement.* "I think he was waiting until after the spell was cast. He probably didn't want to let your hopes up. He's horribly noble like that."

      Buffy nodded. "He is. I'd like to strangle him."

      Cordelia couldn't help smiling a bit at that. She'd felt the same way often enough. "If you'd like some help, my schedule's empty for the rest of the week."

      That got a glare, and then a tiny twitch of lips. "I think I can handle him. If nothing goes wrong."

      "Everything's going to go great," she said, with more conviction than she truly felt. She wasn't about to voice her own doubts to the still distraught Slayer. "Angel will be Angel again in a few minutes, and maybe forever. Then you can beat him for not telling you, and then whatever you want to do to him afterwards is entirely your business. I don't want to hear about it, beforehand or after."

      This time a real smile came from the Slayer. "You're surprisingly good at this consolation thing, you know that?"

      Cordelia grinned. "I'll take that as a compliment. I learned from the king himself." *I just hope he's still here to console others after today.*

***********************

 

Final Chapters