Beyond the Pale

Joey, Pacey, Tori and Dawson arrived at the beach at 10:00 on the Saturday of the School’s Out party. Pacey put down the cooler he was carrying and said, “A lot of people must be at the gym. You can see sand!” That was indeed unusual for a hot, sunny Saturday in June. Final exams were over, and school had been out for three days. The whole summer stretched ahead of them, with no more studying, tests or homework until September.

“Time to start my tan,” Tori said. She spread her towel out a couple of feet away. “Then, when I get really, really hot from lying in the sun, I’ll run and jump in the water!” She pulled her beach robe off and tossed it on the sand. She began getting settled on her towel.

Pacey started digging in Joey’s beach bag for sunscreen, and Joey looked at Dawson. She smirked. He was staring slack-jawed at Tori. “Close your mouth, Dawson,” she murmured. “You’re going to scare the poor girl.”

“Look at her! She’s…” Dawson trailed off. Tori Adams in a bikini made Joey feel like a ten-year old boy, but she couldn’t help but be amused at Dawson’s discomfiture.

Joey leaned close to her friend and whispered into his ear, “I have a challenge for you, Dawson. By the end of the day, I dare you to kiss her. Put both of you out of your misery.” Having planted the idea in his mind, Joey moved to spread out her own towel and take off the long t-shirt she wore over her own bikini.

Pacey was smearing sunscreen on his chest, arms and shoulders. “Do you want me to do your back?” Joey asked him.

“Nah, I’ve got it,” Pacey said, taking a cursory swipe at the area right below his shoulder blades. He tossed the sunscreen on Joey’s towel and loped toward the water. Dawson followed him almost immediately.

Joey stretched out on her towel, feeling the vague unhappiness that had troubled her since her last fight with Pacey returning. He didn’t act like he was angry with her, but he was definitely keeping her at a distance. He’d been very moody for the past couple of weeks, and Joey was at a loss for how to deal with him. She sighed.

“You okay?” Tori asked.

Much to Joey’s surprise, she and Tori were well on their way to being close friends. They’d had several study sessions with the guys before exams, and they’d discovered that they got along well and that they were both without female friends. That seemed to be enough of a basis for getting to know each other better. “I’m just kind of down,” Joey said. “I think Pacey’s still mad at me for believing the rumors Abby and Stacey were spreading.” She’d already told Tori about Pacey’s non-existent fling with Tatiana and his hurt that she hadn’t trusted him.

“He giving you the cold shoulder?” Tori asked. She rubbed a blob of sunscreen into her nose.

Joey snorted. “Cold everything.” She thought about how that sounded. After a brief pause, Joey said, “We didn’t have sex.”

“Yeah, right,” Tori said, staring at Joey.

“We didn’t! I fell asleep at Pacey’s house that night, and Abby drew her own conclusions when she saw me leaving the next morning,” Joey said.

“Dawson thinks you did,” Tori told her.

“So does the rest of the world.” Joey bent her knees and stretched her arms over her head, enjoying the feel of the warm sun on her skin.

“You didn’t want to?” Tori asked.

“Well, I did and I didn’t,” Joey said. She looked up into the sky. The sound of the ocean was soothing the tension out of her body. Pretty soon it was going to put her to sleep. “I’m inexperienced.” She paused. “I’m seventeen, and Pacey’s the first person I’ve done more with than just kiss.”

Tori mulled that over for a while. Then she said, “Dawson hasn’t even kissed me yet.”

“He will,” Joey said confidently. “Didn’t you notice how his eyes popped out of his head when you took off your cover-up?”

“Bet that’s not all that popped out,” Tori said with a smug grin.

Joey was startled into laughter. Tori intrigued her more every day. Underneath her outward reserve, the girl was funny. “You are crazy!” she said.

“I hear that a lot,” Tori said. “So all that turmoil was over something you didn’t even do.”

Joey turned over onto her side, propping herself up on one elbow. “Well, we did some heavy making out…you know, kissing, touching each other.” She shrugged one shoulder. “But we didn’t do it.”

Tori turned over to face Joey. She smirked. “Did he get you off?”

“Tori!” Joey exclaimed. She couldn’t decide whether to laugh or to blush.

“Well?” Tori waited.

“Yes, okay?” Joey finally answered.

“That’s good. A lot of guys don’t.” A small, wicked grin played around the corners of Tori’s mouth. “Did you get him off?”

Joey’s mouth dropped open. She covered her eyes with one hand, scandalized. She was torn between fatal embarrassment and the need to confide in someone. She couldn’t exactly talk to Dawson about this stuff.

“Close your mouth, Joey,” Tori said, amused. “I guess that means you did.”

“Well, yeah.” Joey peeked out from between her fingers at her friend. “It was…uh…” Joey lowered her hand, her face crimson. “It went everywhere!”

Tori snickered.

“I thought it was fine until I got to the bathroom,” Joey said in a low voice. “Then I saw that I had it on my hand, my arm, my shirt, even my leg!”

“Guys are messy with everything they do,” Tori joked, “even that!” She paused. “You could do it with your mouth next time,” she said matter-of-factly. “That’s not too bad if you don’t mind swallowing.”

Joey felt her face turn from crimson to magenta. She stared at Tori, shocked. The girl was 16 and her blue eyes looked as clear and innocent as a baby’s. But she was talking like she’d been around. Several times.

“Look, Joey,” Tori said, sitting up. “I’m the Queen of Everything-But. At my old school, I was fifteen and still a virgin, but I had a reputation as the school slut. I had a lot of dates, because the guys all knew they could get something off of me. It was just a game for them. The sad thing is, none of them were worth my time.”

“Dawson is,” Joey said.

“I know that,” Tori said. She smiled. “I’ve been waiting for someone just like him.”

~o~

Tori sighed happily as the cool water soothed her slightly toasty skin. What a perfect day! Sun, sand, water, girl talk, and attractive guys. Tori ducked under the water, wetting her hair. She and Joey had dozed off on their towels after lunch, and she’d just awakened. Joey was still asleep, she’d seen Pacey walking toward the public bathrooms, and she didn’t know where Dawson had gone. So she’d decided to cool off in the ocean.

She felt more at peace than she had in a long time. Her past mistakes were behind her, and she was creating a new future. With new friends and, hopefully, a new boyfriend. Tori floated on her back, gazing up at the clear sky. Joey Potter was the last girl she would ever have picked as a friend if she’d gone by first impressions. However, Tori had discovered that Joey used her prickly outer shell to hide her insecurities. Once you got to know her, she was warm and genuine.

Water splashed nearby, and Tori glanced to the side to see Dawson swimming toward her. She lowered her feet to the sand in the chest-high water. “Hey,” Dawson said, stopping and standing next to her.

“Where’d you go?” Tori said. She looked up into his dark eyes, trying to ignore the wet, muscular bare chest that was two inches away from her.

“Took a walk,” Dawson said. His damp blond hair hung down over his forehead; he pushed it back with one hand and smiled at her.

“See anything interesting?” Tori asked. She shifted her weight, bringing her about half an inch closer to him.

“Not really,” Dawson said softly.

Tori took a shallow breath, trying to keep her composure. Her skin prickled with the strong current of attraction. The sound of the ocean, the birds crying shrilly overhead, the voices of other beachgoers became muted. Tori’s total attention was focused in on Dawson. She raised one hand and touched his left cheekbone. “You didn’t put on sunscreen, did you? You’re red.”

“I always forget,” Dawson said. He leaned closer, closing the tiny gap between them.

Slowly, Tori dropped her fingers from his cheek. Her heart pounded madly, and she knew undeniably that she was about to be kissed. Dawson tilted his head; his face was so close to hers that she felt his warm breath on her cheek.

His lips touched hers, tentatively at first, then pressing harder. His arms encircled her waist, and Tori leaned into him, sliding her tongue into his open mouth, resting her hands on his shoulders. Kissing him was everything she’d hoped it would be.

~o~

Joey awakened abruptly. She was hot and uncomfortable. She opened her eyes and realized that she was on the beach; she could hear the ocean. There was something draped over part of her face and her chest and stomach. Joey sat up, pushing it away. It was Pacey’s t-shirt, and Pacey himself was sitting beside her on Tori’s towel. “You slept a long time,” he said, glancing at her. “You were starting to burn.”

Joey wiped the sweat from her forehead and neck, blinking groggily.

“Hey, hey,” Pacey said. “Will you look at that? Tori and Dawson have discovered water sports.”

Joey looked out into the ocean and spotted Tori and Dawson locked together in chest-high water, kissing passionately, oblivious to anyone around them. She was happy for them, but suddenly she felt very sorry for herself. That combined with the dream she’d had while she was asleep made her eyes sting with tears.

When Joey didn’t speak, Pacey turned to her. “What’s wrong, Jo?” he asked.

Joey hitched in her breath. “I dreamed that you didn’t love me anymore.” She began to cry in earnest, turning her face away.

“Hey, c’mere,” Pacey said. He pulled her into his arms, and she rested her wet face against his bare shoulder. “Nothing could be farther from the truth,” Pacey told her.

“Sometimes I don’t know what to think,” Joey said. “I feel like you’re holding yourself back from me, like...like you’re still mad at me or something.”

Pacey was silent, but he continued to hold her, running the fingers of one hand through her hair. Finally he said, “The thing is, I trust you so completely not to hurt me...I guess I was just wondering what I was doing wrong that you didn’t trust me.”

“I do trust you,” Joey said, raising her head from his shoulder, “and I did then. I was so upset that everyone was talking about us like we were some dirty joke that I wasn’t thinking straight.” She touched his face, tracing the line of his jaw. “I’m sorry I didn’t believe you,” she said softly.

“I love you,” Pacey told her. He kissed her once, tenderly.

“I love you too, Pace,” Joey said. She nestled back into his arms and stayed there for a long time, her ear against his chest, lulled by the sound of his heartbeat.

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