Willow threw the TV remote against her wall. She knew it was coming. She knew
it for a long time. Some times it would show its ugly face then hide. But not
tonight. Instead it jumped out and bit her in the ass. But it didn't surprise
her. Not at all. You would think since she was expecting it she still
wouldn't be hurt.

Willow got up and walked out of her room so that she wouldn't break anything
else that she was going to have to replace. She made her way down to the
kitchen to find some food. She opened the door and browsed through the
fridge. Of course there was nothing in there. No one was ever home to go
grocery shopping. She slammed the door shut. "Fuck all of ya'll!" she
screamed. She wouldn't cry instead she made her mood take a more violent
direction. She stomped into the living room and threw herself down on the
couch and stared at the blank television.

It wasn't just Buffy. There had to have been an accomplice to make Buffy
forget about her. And who would that be? Angel. Yea sure he kept up the
sweet, innocent, cute, doubtful, guilty facade. But when it was all stripped
away he was nothing but selfish. Grasping onto anything to keep his humanity
in check. Even if it meant hurting someone else. Even though she tried
directing some of her anger at him she knew it wasn't all his fault. No
matter how much she wanted to hate everyone she couldn't. He probably had no
idea how she felt. That was fine then turn the anger onto someone that should.

Xander. "Son of a bitch." she mumbled. Yea he was her friend. And no matter
how much she hated him he would probably always be her friend. But he was
still dense as a brick. Not knowing when he was hurting someone till it was
to late. Just like Buffy though, it took an accomplice. That would be
Cordelia. "Hoe." she whispered. She wasn't even going to go there.

Sure there had been Oz. He cared for her. And she would always be grateful to
him for making her feel so special. But he wasn't there anymore. Even when he
had been there he wasn't totally devoted to her. And he shouldn't be. There
was his music. But when he graduated his parents made him move. Because of
his condition for one. They wanted him away from the hell mouth. Maybe his
parents actually were aware of the bad mojo around Sunnydale. She had thought
about calling him and unloading all of her problems onto him. But he had his
own. And besides that, it was his time of the month.

So what was she going to do? That was a good question. She could always storm
into the library one day and call them all selfish bastards and tell them to
kiss her ass and don't talk to her anymore. But that would get her no where.
Although the look on there faces would probably be priceless. But Giles
needed her help. He couldn't do all the research by himself. None of them
ever wanted to take the time to do it. "Selfish bastards." she grumbled. No
she was going to take the silent approach. Not say a damn thing at all.
Because when it was all over it would be there fault. Not hers. She only had
like 6 months left of school. She could do it. With that one moment Willow
started a slow process of drawing herself away from the outside world. And
then when it was all over. No more school and no more commitments, she would
leave. Forever.
One thing is for sure Willow never broke a promise. Maybe bended it and
molded it to her liking later. But never broke it. She recalled her promise
from a few months ago. She should have realized she wouldn't be able to do
something so drastic as to cut herself off from her friends. But there was a
difference. She had hardly went out with them after that. Although she had
remained friends and always acted nice and pleasing. Sometimes she had had
fun though. But later she had kicked herself for it.

But today she wouldn't have to worry about any of them. She could start over.
She walked over to the pictures she had placed on her shelf. Some where when
she was little with Xander and Jesse. And occasionally one with her Mom. But
most where of all of them. Xander, Buffy, and Giles. Even Cordelia. She
couldn't help it they were her friends. When she was a kid. Now she was
growing up. And it is time to leave childish things behind. She picked up the
one of her and her Mom and threw it in her suitcase and left the others to
sit on her shelf. The only one who would be there would be her Mom. Even
though sometimes she wasn't there.

Willow walked into the bathroom and picked up the final items to pack. The
most irritating ones you couldn't pack till the last minute. After about ten
more minutes of checking and rechecking and throwing a few more sentimental
things in she closed her suitcases and brought them down stairs. She didn't
even turn around to look at her room. Well, yea she did. Her computer. She
was going to have to live without it for a few days. Her Mom had actually
given her money to go buy a new one. Poor old computer. She thought it was a
going away gift and a way of saying good job. But she couldn't tell.

Willow walked down the stairs and turned the door knob slowly. The thought of
leaving and going to a new place was actually starting to cry. But it would
be better right? No more demons or vampire or end of the world predictions.
And hell now she had a longer life expectancy. She closed the door behind her
and locked it. All of her friends had wanted to go with her to the airport.
She had refused to let them. Telling them it would be easier for her to do it
by herself. But that wasn't true. She wanted to make a clean brake. Not have
anything to remind her of what she was leaving behind and would be missing.
She saw the taxi pull up in front of her house. She picked up her bags and
brought them to the back of the taxi where the man helped her load them in.
She got in the back and had a silent cry all the way to the airport. Before
she left she had already decided she wouldn't be coming back for any breaks.
Her friends didn't know that but her Mom did. She had told her she wanted to
get as much stuff in school done as possible. So her Mom had surprisingly
said she would come up there sometimes to visit her. It had made her happy to
say the least.

After getting on the plane and seated comfortably in her seat Willow finally.
Let it all soak in. She was leaving. For good maybe. To never return. Willow
had her sites set high. She knew she could always call the computer people
who had wanted her during the job fair thing at school. Poor Xander. A prison
guard. She smiled. She opened up her purse to find a piece of gum. But what
she came across wasn't what she had expected. It was a picture. Of her,
Buffy, and Xander in a little photo booth in the mall. She thought about
throwing it away. Remember clean brake she told herself. But decided to hold
on to it. After all they where a part of her past.

She laid back and closed her eyes. Her thoughts set on the future. College.
What the hell was she going to do there. She had to admit she might miss all
the weird things. But on the bright side she would be able to walk around
freely at night. She laughed out loud. Remembering the bottles of water and
crosses and stakes she had thrown in her suitcase. Always be prepared. That
was the best part though. No more vampires. She hated the damn things. Always
ruining something.

Willow looked around to make sure everything was in order in her dorm.
Surprisingly away from home she wasn't a very neat person. She abandoned
pretty much every thing she was before and became a new person. Well, she
still was a little shy. Her thoughts where interrupted by a knock on her
door. She walked up to it and opened it without a second thought. Nothing she
would have done in Sunnydale.

"Ready? Oh look! You cleaned your room!" the girl in the doorway said
surprised.

"Yea just for you." Willow said sweetly.

"All right enough chit chat. You ready for a night out girl?" the girl asked.

"Yea let me grab my purse." Willow went back over to her bed and grabbed her
purse and walked out the room locking the door behind her.

"All right no turning back. You haven't been out in a while and I'm set on
showing you a good time. Even if it kills me."

"Oh yea Kim. That would be nice." Willow said sarcastically.

Kim just smirked. Willow liked Kim. She had been her new best friend. She met
her through her room mate who she had also became friends with. Kim was a
little like Buffy. Personality wise. Although Kim could be a little more
spiteful to people. Though Buffy had the sarcastic thing down. After all she
had to deal with vampires everyday. But the likeness ended there. On the
outside the where totally different. Kim had jet black hair cut to her
shoulders about the same height as her. Big round blue eyes and was a skinny
as a post. Willow thought she had an eating disorder at first. But Kim said
it was a genetic thing. Her whole family was like that. And they where. Some
breaks and even one summer when her Mom couldn't come visit her she would go
home with Kim.

"So where are we headed?" Willow asked.

"I have no clue. I figured we would take our chances on the streets of New
York at night and find a couple of places. Tonight we're going to go clubbing
babe. And after all I have you here to protect me." She smiled her half smile.

Willow smiled but on the inside winced. She remembered that night. When he
and Kim where becoming friends and it was one of there first nights out
together. A tall rather pale male jumped out in front of them. Along with
another person who was actually human. To the day she didn't understand what
the vampire was doing with a human. But it was obvious the boy wasn't aware
of it. She kicked the vampires feet out from under him which had taken him
totally by surprise causing his real face to emerge. Luckily Kim was facing
the other way with the human boy. But the boy saw it. Willow had taken that
moment to pull holy water out pour it over him. The vampire howled in protest
and jumped up and ran off causing the boy to do the same but in a different
direction.

That night had saddened Willow. She had known that vampires weren't
restricted to Sunnydale and they would probably be in New York if anywhere.
But it saddened her to know that her old life would always be right behind
her. Lurking behind some shadow waiting to jump out.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Willow winced at the sound of the loud music. Of course that was what had led
them to that club. And she had been checked for an id. Again. Jeez she was
over 21 and they still where checking her to see if she could get in. Kim got
in with no problem. Bastards.

Willow followed Kim up to the bar where Kim bought them both drinks.

"Here ya go chick" she slid one over to Willow. She noticed Willow looking
around. "What ya looking at?"

"Willow came back to reality and turned to Kim. "You know I have no clue."
she smiled.

"All right then." Kim raised her glass and Willow followed. "Here is to a
night of fun, dancing, acting crazy, and getting wasted off our asses."

"Here, here." Willow said and the clunked there glasses together. Willow
threw the fiery liquid down her throat not even knowing what it was.

"Hey Willow your getting good at handling your alcohol. We're going to have
to see how far you last tonight." Kim said and laughed.

"Yea right. Just catch me when I pass out k?"

"No problem. Well, come on lets get our asses out on that dance floor." Kim
said and grabbed Willow wrist and yanked her out there.

Willow groaned. It wasn't that she was a bad dancer. She just hadn't been
out dancing in a while.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

About 6 hours, 4 more clubs, and a lot more drinks later Willow and Kim where
once again on the dance floor.

"Damn Kim you weren't joking when you said "a good time." Willow yelled over
the music.

"Do I ever joke about having a good time?" she yelled back. She tapped Willow
on the shoulder and poured an imaginary glass into her mouth signaling it was
time for another drink. Willow nodded and followed her to the bar.

They sat there quietly. They both where surveying the crowd.

"All right Willow we have been out here for...." Kim looked at her watch and
squinted then shook her head and looked back up "a long time. And we haven't
picked up on any guys."

"All right who then?" Willow asked her speech a little slurred. After all she
had a lot of drinks. Also causing her to throw all of her shyness out the
door.

"Hmmmmmmm. How about him?" Kim said and pointed out into the crowd.

Willow smirked. "Like I can tell who you are talking about."

"Oh come on his hair kind of stands out. Although he is dancing with a girl
I'm sure I can get him away from her."

Willow saw the hair. How could anyone miss it? White. As soon as she had let
it hit her an image flashed into her mind. "Oh no." she whispered. Her heart
beat quickened and her eyes started to water from fear. Old feelings rushed
back to her. "No." she whispered to herself. She leaned over to try to get a
look at his face. Although she could only see a little of the side of him it
still looked like him. "No. He's mine." Willow said loud enough for only Kim
to hear.

Kim noticed the change in Willows mood and decided to let her have what she
wanted. "All right girl. Go for him. I'll go find another."

Willow got up and started to head over there then turned around. "Kim."

"Huh?"

"Do me a big favor and please stay inside." Willow said pleadingly. Where
there was one there was bound to be more.

Kim stared at her wondering where the desperate request came from. "Aight. No
problem."

Willow turned back around and weaved her way through the crowd until she was
right behind him. It was him. If anything it was the clothing that gave it
away. She couldn't help but wonder if he ever changed.

She tapped him on the shoulder and reached as far down in her as she could to
find her courage. "Excuse me. May I cut in?"

"Not now ducs." Spike said with his recognizable accent. He had been working
this girl all night. He wasn't about to lose her now because of some horny
teenager.

Now she knew it was him. Just hearing his voice sent chills up her spine.
Willow reached into her pocket and pulled out a cross and held it only an
inch away from his back.

Spike felt the burn and growled pushing the girl back and he turned around to
be faced with a familiar face.

Willow jumped at his swift movement and all of her courage retreated at the
site of his angry face and glowing eyes. But she couldn't help but register
his surprise.

"Well, well, well. Isn't it the little witch." he said humorously.

"I'm not a witch anymore." she said. She hadn't done anything witch like in a
really long time. It was gone along with her old self. She left that person
back in Sunnydale.

"Really?" he smirked.

Willow looked over his shoulder at the girl who was obviously upset and was
glaring at her. If only that girl knew she had just saved her life.

"So..." he stood there with a confused look on his face. "Name pet?"

"Wi-Willow." she said mumbling out the words 'Get a grip girl.' she told
herself.

"What brings you here?" he asked like he was having an everyday conversation.

Willow looked up at him a squinted her eyes. What the hell does he mean 'what
brings me here?' "Does that matter?"

He smiled. "I suppose not." he then turned around and whispered something to
the girl who stumped off obviously upset. "What can I say. Women want me."

Willow stared at him not sure yet if she should leave him there and go on her
way. If he would let her leave. "Can we go over there?" she asked and pointed
towards the bar.

"Why?" he asked suspiciously. Where there was one there was bound to be
another. He was accepting the slayer and her puppy to jump out and get him at
any time.

"Because we are looking a little suspicious standing here." she explained.

He eyes her up for a moment the motioned for her to go ahead of him.

She shook her head. "I don't think so."

He smirked. "Well, I'm not going to go before you." he said and nodded
towards the cross that she still gripped in her hand.

"Well, I'm not putting this away. So why don't we walk next to each other."
she said unsurely.

He laughed. "All right ducks. We'll walk 'next' to each other." And laughed
again as they made here way to the bar. She was really getting tired of his
laugh.

She took the seat next to him and turned around and scanned the crowd looking
for Kim. She spotted her a few feet away talking to two guys who 'looked'
pretty normal.

"Looking for someone pet?" Spike questioned.

"A friend." she confessed.

"Your meeting someone here?" he asked cautiously getting a little nervous.

"No. I'm making sure she's okay." she said before she could stop herself. No,
he knows she is here unprotected.

"Really?" he said raising his eyebrows. He turned to the bartender and asked
for a drink."Well I guess we could have a conversation but I don't think that
would work now would it. So let's get down to the point. Why are you here?"

She thought a minute deciding if she should answer his question. What would
it hurt. He could kill her now or later. "I go to college here."

"And the slayer?" he asked.

"Sunnydale."

"Ah. I'm surprised you went so far from home little girl."

She just stared at him.

"Now why did you interrupt my dinner?"

"I couldn't let you kill her." she said softly. He swallowed his drink.

"I'm just going to go out and kill someone else."

She bit her lip realizing what he said was true. He leaned over towards her
to whisper into her ear. She leaned back as far as she could and started to
fall until her wrapped one of his arms around her to hold her up.

"So now I'm going to go out there and choose an innocent person. It could be
a mother of to children. It could be a girl about your age. Or it could even
be your friend. Or maybe just maybe. It could be you." he whispered and
grazed two sharp teeth along her throat.

Willow let out a whimper as a tears started to stream down her face. She
looked around at the people. The music loud in her ears. And she was starting
to come down from her buzz making the realization of what was happening
worse.

Spike sat back up and looked at Willow. Seeing her desperate and crying made
it hard for him not to sink his teeth in her. But he just didn't want to. As
simple as that. The demon did though. He stared at her a little longer then
got up and left without another word. Tonight he wouldn't feed. Why he
wondered. Just to be nice? He wasn't Angelus. He didn't go around hurting
people for the hell of it. Only if they made him mad. He sat in the alley and
waited. Maybe he would eat her anyway.

Willow laid her head down on the bar table and tried to think. But her
thoughts where interrupted by a tap on the shoulder.

"Hey you. What's wrong?" Kim asked concerned.

"Nothing. Just not feeling all that great. The alcohol his having bad side
affects." Willow lied.

"Yea I know how you feel. I'm losing my buzz anyway. Let's jet." she said
kindly and helped Willow off the bar stool and they headed out the door. Kim
started down the side walk but Willow grabbed her arm and stopped her.

"Let's take a taxi. It's late and I don't feel like walking." she lied again.

"Aight." Kim flagged down a taxi and they jumped in.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spike watched the to girls from the shadows. He noticed Willow stop the girl
from walking off and then the girl stopped a taxi. "Good girl." he said to
Willow then made his way down the alley.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This was even better then he would have thought. Spike has a human friend.
The Master will be thrilled to hear this. Especially since the Master hasn't
been getting many reports back about Spike since Spike usually catches the
vampires sent out to follow him. He hurried out of the club and made his way
quickly back to the layer.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Willow laid back on her bed. When she had got back to the dorm she had
changed and showered. Luckily her roommate hadn't come home. She laid down
and cried. It was all coming back. She would never be able to run away from
it. That's what she was doing was running. And she couldn't tell anyone. If
Spike found out she did he would come after her. And there would be no one
there to protect her. Something caught her attention on her desk. It was
weird. Nothing that would have triggered her memory until now. Now that she
was feeling like the Willow from Sunnydale. Not the Willow from New York.
Which one was she? Both? How could she be two different people? Maybe she
needed to go back Sunnydale. She stared at the object a little longer then
decided she could be Sunnydale Willow to. She concentrated for a moment and
before she knew what was happening a pencil levitated off of her desk and
started spinning furiously. She smiled.

Willow put all of her stuff on the ground while she unlocked the door. She
peaked in to make sure her roommate wasn't still there. "Whew thank God."
Willow picked up the bags and entered her dorm room and kicked the door
closed behind her. She laid the bags down on her bed and sat down next to
them and started emptying then out. After all of the items where laid out she
pulled a book out from under her bed. It was old. And she had been lucky to
find it. But the women at the store said she could use it. And she had just
given it to Willow for free.

Willow leafed through it until she found what she was looking for. "Perfect."
she laid the book on the floor then walked over to the door and opened it
again. She poked her head out the door and look around. Satisfied that there
was no one else left she closed the door and locked it just to be sure. She
had thought spring break would never come.

She walked back over to her bed and picked up a few things and sat down on
the floor with them. She started mixing stuff together while chanting some
words. After adding the final ingredient there was a loud poof and a flash of
purple light. Willow took a deep breath then stood up and walked over to the
mirror. "Oh my God!" she touched her nose and her forehead. Everything felt
the same. But the image was different. She mumbled a few words then the image
disappeared and the same old Willow stared back at her. "Thank God." she took
a deep breath and shook her head. "So that's what I look like as a vampire."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Willow laid in bed sifting through her mail. She had gotten a letter from
Buffy two days ago. And now one from Xander. She knew what it was going to
say. Why hadn't she come home yet? Truth is she could have been done with
college before now. But she liked it here. She read Xanders letter. He
complained about Cordelias current love. They had broken up after there
freshman year of college. She didn't really understand why. Every once in a
while she would get a letter from Cordelia. Like on her birthday. Or some
other special occasion. And then she had to listen to Cordelia complain about
Xanders love life. Maybe they were meant to be together. They obviously still
cared for each other.

Willow reached over to her bedstand and grabbed the letter from Buffy. Buffy
of course was still involved with Angel surprisingly. Willow would have
though they would have ended it a long time ago. Especially Angel. But that
was there problem not hers.

Both Buffy and Xander had fussed at her for not coming home for spring break.
She hadn't been in Sunnydale since she had left for college. And she had told
them she was going to go work for that computer company after college. But
now she was having second thoughts. Maybe she should give herself a couple of
months for a break and go back home. After that she could leave and again and
stay gone another five years. Willow sat up and reached over for the stakes
she had been carving. She had been noticing a lot more vampires lately. None
had attacked her but she had noticed them. And it was starting to scare her.
And her recent run in with Spike hadn't helped matters much."After living on
the Hellmouth you can never be to prepared." she said to herself and
continued carving the stakes.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kim walked quietly down the dorm halls. Willow hadn't known that Kim was
coming home early. Truthfully she had come back because of Willow. Willow had
been locking herself in her dorm room a lot lately. Never wanting to leave or
wanting Kim to leave. And when she did leave Willow always told her to catch
a cab home or go with a group of people. That girl was getting weird. So Kim
had decided that she would come back early and spend some time Willow.

When she got to Willows door she noticed and odd humming sound an a faint
reddish light glowing from under the door. "What the hell is going on with
that girl?" She knocked and waited. But there was no response. She put her
hand on the door handle and opened it slowly. She was surprised to find that
it was unlocked. When she had opened the door a few inches the reddish light
got brighter. She opened the door the rest of the way. And what she saw she
would never forget.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Willow was broken out of her spell by the interruption of an outside force.
She opened her eyes slowly as to not interrupt the spell. "Oh no. Kim!" she
yelled after the girls retreating figure. She hurried and bid the goddesses
farewell. Afterall she was just a simple spell communicating with the
goddesses giving them her thanks so that they would continue to help her. She
jumped up and ran after Kim whose small figure was running swiftly down the
hall. "Kim!" Kim didn't stop. Willow reached out with an imaginary force and
shut the doors leading out of the hall. She couldn't let Kim leave knowing
what she knew. Kim stopped short. She tried pushing on the door but it
wouldn't budge. She turned around slowly to face Willow. After all this was
her friend.

"Kim let me explain. Please." when she noticed that Kim wasn't moving she
tried again. "Look Kim it isn't what you think."

"Oh yea right! Give me a break. What the hell was that!?!?!" he yelled form
the other end of the hall.

Willow hadn't thought it was much at the time. But to an outsider it might
look kind of scary. She had had three glass orbs floating above her head in
the shape of a triangle. And if she remembered correctly they where putting
off a lot of light and noise. And she vaguely remember sparks of light flying
around her. "Kim please. I'm the same person as before. Just no there is a
little more. Well, there has always been a little more to me." Kim still was
staring at her but she didn't look as scared as she was before. "Kim I won't
hurt you." It hurt Willow to say it. It hurt that she had to reassure her
friend that she was safe from her. "Kim please." Willow pleaded desperately.

Kim took a deep breath and walked back towards Willow.

Willow stood there not moving until Kim reached her. It was obvious her
friend was still keeping her distance. Willow turned and walked into her room
and sat on her bed. Kim followed behind her and sat in the chair closest to
the door. "All right explain." she said.

Willow took a deep breath."I-I'm a witch."

"No, I think you where wrong. That was kind of along the lines of what I was
thinking." she said sarcastically.

"But Kim I'm a good witch." Willow explained.

"A good one? So that means there must be bad ones out there right? Is that
supposed to make me feel better?"

"I just wanted you to know I wouldn't hurt you." Willow said.

Kim looked around.

Oh shit Willow thought. Everything was still laying out. Ingredients to
spells. Old books not to mention quite a few stake, crosses, and holy water.

"Does this having anything to do with that night when you saved us from those
men?" Kim asked lowly.

Willow took a deep breath and rested her head in her hands. "No, that is
something totally different."

"What do you mean different? I'm guessing that wasn't your everyday mugging
right?"

"I can't tell you." Willow whispered. She couldn't let Kim know. She wouldn't
allow Kims life to be changed forever like hers was.

Kim glared. "But it was different right?"

Willow nodded. "Lets take a walk." Willow said. She couldn't stand to be
reminded of what she really was by all of the things surrounding her.

Kim eyed her up for a minute then followed her out the door.

"Perfect." the figure in the shadows said as the girls made there way down
the sidewalk.

"All right so I get it now. Where your from there is all this freaky stuff
going on which you are used to. But you won't tell me what it is because you
don't want to get me involved right?" Kim asked summarizing there talk they
had had over the past thirty minutes.

"Yes, That's it." Willow said.

"Okay so where does you being a witch come in?" Kim asked still not
understanding when and how she had become one.

"Well, that was kind of a side effect. To put it simply something happened
and I had to work a little magic to fix it and after that I got hooked."

"Uh huh. Well, to tell you the truth I still am having a little trouble
believing you." Kim confessed.

"It's understandable. But that is the only explanation you will get out of me
because that is the only one there is. No more no less. Well, yea there is
more but you know I can't tell you that." Willow stated.

"So now what?" Kim asked not knowing where they should take things form there.

"Nothing. We go along as usual. You can't tell anyone. There are always some
weirdoes out there that will get the wrong idea. And believe me it has
happened to me. Those damn two little kids." Willow grumbled the last part.

Kim looked at her oddly but decided not to pursue the weird statement because
it was probably in the subject of 'I can't tell you that.'

Willow looked at her watch then around the street. "It's kinda late I think
we should be heading back now." Not only that but there wasn't anyone else on
the street. How could she have been so stupid? She must be getting soft. She
would have never done this back home. But she isn't in Sunnydale now is she?

"All right." Kim said and they stopped and turned around only to be stopped
by a man in the shadows.

"Maybe you two girls would like an escort?" the stranger said.

Amy backed up behind Willow. For some reason after seeing Willows new
abilities she felt like Willow could protect them both.

Willow recognized the way he talked. No one she knew personally but she could
tell there was something interfering with the way he was talking. Like for an
example really long teeth. Please don't be a vampire. She must have a
'vampires come get me' sign on her forehead. Maybe she had a certain smell
that said she knew about them. Maybe on the Hellmouth you have a certain
smell. Whatever it was they seemed to be all around her lately. Watching her.

"No thank you. I think we can make it home on our own." Willow said as
bravely as she could even if it wasn't a vampire they could still be in
trouble.

He stepped out of the shadows and her fears where confirmed. "No. I insist."

Kim screamed. Willow stared. He was in full vamp mode. Where was a slayer
when you needed one. Willow reached into her pocket slowly hoping her
movements would go unnoticed.

"I don't think so girlie" the vamp said and knocked her hand out of her
pocket. "Try it again and she dies." he pointed at Kim. "I'm hear for you not
her."

"What do you want from me?" Willow asked. Who could possibly want her. Spike?

"My Master wants you." he stated.

"Who Spike?" she asked curiously. Remember girl curiosity killed the cat.
Poor cat.

The vamp laughed. "Yea right. That boy has been exiled. We want to catch him
though. But he has managed to evade us every time. So that is why I'm here
for you."

Willow finally realized what he intended. "What you think Spike will come for
me?"

The vampire nodded.

"Me and him are hardly friends. More like enemies." she confessed. Then
realizing that it may not have been the best thing. Now the vamp had no use
for her. She watched it's reaction to the news. She saw fear. Fear from his
master? Most likely she thought.

"You looked intimate at the club that night." he asked more then stated.

"Oh yea right. He was threatening me. You obviously missed the part where I
was crying in fear." she said. Laughing inside at the stupid vampire. Hey she
could get used to this courage thing.

Kim watched the whole thing with amazement. The two of them had just
forgotten she was there. And Willow hadn't even been surprised by the site of
him. And what is this about someone named Spike at a club. Was it that night
where she got depressed? After she thought about it she realized Willow had
started changing after that moment.

The vampire was scared. His Master would not be happy at his foolish mistake.
He growled. This girl was causing him more trouble then she was worth.

Willow heard the vampires growl and took a step back pushing Kim back with
her. Okay maybe she couldn't get used to this courage thing. Her attention
was removed from the vampire by a whistling. The vampire noticed it to
because he looked away from Willow and looked behind her. Willow took that
opportunity to pull out a stake and her cross. And slid them up her coat
sleeve.

"Who's there?" the vampire yelled out into the distance.

"Hello mate." said a familiar voice. Willow stiffened unsure is she should be
glad or more frightened by his presence.

The vampire recognized the voice to. "What do you want Spike?"

Kim turned at the mention of the name they had been talking about earlier.
She waited for him to come into the light so that she could get a good view
of him. "Oh no." Kim whispered. It was the same man from that night at the
club. Was that the reason Willow insisted she have him?

"You my friend are starting to work on my nerves." Spike said outright not
even making a sarcastic remark.

"This isn't any of your business." the cowardly vampire said.

"I think it is. If anyone is going to kill the little witch it will be me.
And as it turns out you are trying to take her because of me right?" Spike
asked getting no response form the vampire. Spiked grabbed him by his throat
and lifted him into the air and growled. "RIGHT?!?!"

The fledging nodded.

"That's what I thought. Well, you can't have her only because you are trying
to get to me!"

The vampire kicked Spike initiating a fight. They fought back in forth for a
little while Spike obviously winning. "Stake!" Spike yelled to Willow.

Willow reacted immediately sliding the stake down into her hand and tossing
it to Spike. He snatched it and staked the vampire.

Kim watched with amazement as the man exploded into dust and grateful to the
man who saved there life until she saw that he had a face just like the other
man. Her fears returned.

"Never leave home without it." Spike said and tossed it to Willow.

She caught it and held onto it still not trusting him.

Kim watched the interaction between the two. They stared at each other for a
moment.

"What do you want?" Willow asked fearfully.

"That little bitch had been following me since that night in the club. I
heard there was something planned so I decided to follow him tonight. Lucky
for you isn't it?" Spike said and slid back into his human form and smiled.

"Is it?" Willow asked.

"Don't worry Willow I'm not going to kill you. Im not Angelus. Damn bastard."

Willow was surprised at Spike using her real name and not little witch or
little girl.

"So we can go?" Willow asked hesitantly.

"Yes."

Willow eyed him up but decided it would be better to leave now before he
changed his mind. She grabbed onto Kim and started heading back without
saying a word.

"See you around ducks!" Spike laughed and went the other way once again
whistling.

Just hearing him say that made all of her fear return.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Willow spent half of the night relaying all of her adventures with Buffy and
the scooby gang to Kim. Oz being a werewolf. Angel the vampire with a soul
turning bad. His relationship with Buffy. Spike and Druscilla. The Master.
Buffy being the slayer. Vampires in general. And the Hellmouth. Why did Kim
have to find out? It was happening just like it did with Buffy. By Buffy
getting involved with Willow and Xander they also got there lives changed
forever. And the same was with Kim. Is this how Buffy felt? Guilty?
Responsible? Now if something happened to Kim she would blame herself.

After reliving all of the things that happened on in Sunnydale Willow felt
homesick. She laughed to herself that night in bed after Kim had fallen
asleep in her roommates bed. She was to scared to leave. And Willow didn't
blame her. Imagine thinking about monsters and vampires and getting
kidnapped, knocked out, hit, kicked, almost burned at the stake, put in a
coma, stalked and everything else she couldn't remember she would still want
to go home. She laughed.

Then there was Spike. What was his deal? He had given up two chances to kill
her. And maybe more. Why? Against her better judgment she found herself
thinking better of the damn vampire.

Spike sat down into his chair and brought the cigarette up to his mouth. What
was his problem? Following that damn girl for the past couple of weeks. He
was a vampire she was human. There was no reason for him to be protecting
her. He should be draining the life form her instead. What he also didn't
understand is his demon. The demon wanted her blood but at the same time
wanted her for itself. He was getting tired of it. He was almost ready to
kill her just to stop feeling this way. He had killed two vampires that had
been following her since the last time he had seen her. He'd had enough. It
was time to settle this problem once and for all.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Willow sat at her computer bored to death. After talking to a few people and
sending some e mails she had nothing else to do. She signed off and went to
go change but didn't even get as far as her dresser before someone knocked on
her door. She opened it to the discover Kim with a hand around her neck. And
that hand belonged to Spike. She started breathing faster and fear crept into
her voice.

"Wh-What do you want?" she stared at Kim. It was all her fault her friend had
tears running down her face and she could see the fear in her eyes.

"Invite me in." he commanded not in a happy tone. Almost angry.

"What?" she asked incredulously

"You heard me. Invite me in and I let the girl go." he commanded her.

Willow had no choice. "Come in."

"You tell anyone and she dies." Spike said to Kim. She nodded. He let her go
then walked into Willows room and shut the door and locked it.

Willow back up until she bumped into the bed. "What do you want from me?" she
asked meekly.

"What did you do to me pet?" he asked in a dangerous tone.

"Wh-what do you mean?" she asked and moved towards her dresser. He walked up
to her noticing she was heading for a cross. He grabbed both of her arms and
held them at her sides.

"For the past couple of weeks I have been following you. Making sure you
where fine. I've killed two vampires because they where following you. Why
should I care? I can only figure that you put some kind of spell on me."

Willow started to cry. He was acting crazy and she had no idea what he was
talking about. "I-I didn't do anything Spike. I swear."

He noticed the tears streaming down her face but he didn't take any
satisfaction in it. He raised one of his hands to her face. She flinched back
but he moved the other hand to the small of her back. He wiped the tears away
from her face gently. She whimpered.

Spike realized what he was doing and stopped. He pushed her down on the bed
and walked over to the chair and sat down. She backed up against the wall and
sat there and stared at him.

"If you didn't do it then I don't know who did." he said lowly.

"Did what?" she asked slowly not wanting to upset him.

"Made me feel like this." he said and leaned back in the chair and looked at
her.

"Like what?" she asked.

"Don't play stupid little girl! I could break you neck in one moment!" he
yelled and stood up and threw the chair against the wall and growled at her.
She started crying again. Why did he keep feeling like this! Everytime she
cried or backed away from him he felt terrible.

Willow was scared. His eyes where turning color and he kept on growling. Not
to mention the fact that he was having violent mood swings.

"I want to kill you so bad." he said not noticing the fear on her face at the
statement. "But I can't." he confessed.

She was taken totally by surprise why couldn't he kill her. She had to know.

"What's stopping you?" she asked.

"Why? Do you want to die pet?"

She shook her head quickly.

"Myself. Im stopping myself. I keep telling myself to get rid of you and it
would be easier. But then I don't want to." he said softly. Which was weird
coming from a deranged vampire named Spike.

Willow had an idea but it was to crazy to admit. And she was certainly not
going to tell him. Could he possibly have feelings for her? It seemed
impossible.

"Come here." he commanded her from the middle of the room. "Now."

She scooted off of the bed and walked slowly to him. She looked off to the
side afraid to look into his eyes.

He didn't like her like this. Afraid of him. It wasn't fun. It put his hand
under her chin and raised her face to look at him. "Look at me." he said
sternly.

She looked at him. Just looking at him made her start crying again. Maybe he
would be able to kill her after all.

Why did she have to cry all the time!?!?! Was she really that scared of him?
By just looking at him she was crying. Although he didn't make a good
entrance. And his temper hadn't really been in check since he arrived.

He cupped her face and wiped the tears away. He knew what was coming. Why
couldn't he stop it? Why should he? He was his own man. He could do whatever
the hell he wanted to. And if that was to kiss a 22 year old girl so be it.
Son of a bitch.

Willow looked up at him. He was being so gentle with her. Why if he was
getting ready to kill her. Maybe she was right. Maybe he did have feelings
for her. She noticed his face getting closer. She was scared but at the same
time excited. Did Spike really want to kiss her? She didn't have much longer
to think about it. Because before she knew it her thoughts where confirmed.

Spike lips touched hers gently at first as to not scare her off. He noticed
her eyes had closed. Was she doing this willingly then? He didn't waste
another moment out of fear she would back off. He deepened the kiss. And her
mouth opened to welcome his.

Willow didn't know if this was a trick or not. Why trick her though. To hell
with it. She kissed him back.

After a few moments Spike pulled away and her eyes opened and she took a deep
intake of breath. He had forgot that she was human and needed to breathe.
That made the realization of what he hit him. He backed away from her slowly
as not to scare her. He turned and walked out the door without looking back.
He would have to deal with this later. Now he had to go out and find himself
a kill to calm himself down.

Willow watched him walk out the door. He didn't say anything. And she almost
found herself wanting to tell him not to leave. That would have been crazy
though. After the door shut she touched her lips. What the hell is going on
here?

Willow walked out the doors of the building. Even though it was New York City
it was still nice to be outside instead of cooped up in that office building.
Although she did have a pretty big office. There are some advantages when
being a brain.

She walked slowly towards the college. It wasn't to far off. And she was kind
of hoping to run into someone. Spike to be more specific. Last night had been
one of the most weirdest, scariest, most wonderful nights of her life. God
she hoped she had another like it.

"Why'd you do it pet?" a voice asked.

Willow spun around to face Spike. He didn't look upset. That was a good sign.

"Do what?" she asked not understanding his question.

"Uninvited me." he said calmly. She better have a rational explanation.

"Oh. Um well it is as simple as this. You are a vampire and I am human. And
we are 'supposed' to be enemies. And I'm still a little unsure of what
happened last night. Then there is the fact that I have a roommate. And
though you say you won't hurt me I'm not to sure if I would trust you around
her." she hoped he wouldn't be mad.

"All right. Fair enough. Lets go." he said and put his hand on her back and
pushed her towards the college.

She walked quietly for a moment. "Why did you go to my room? And why are you
walking me home?" she asked softly.

"After killing that little bitch vampire the other ones still think that you
mean something to me." Willow flinched at what he said almost as if it wasn't
true. "So that means they will be looking to grab you again. And since I
killed his stupid ass they think I am protecting you. Which is true."

"Why?" she wondered.

"We went over that last night." he said nothing after that and walked her
home the rest of the way in silence.

For the next few weeks it when on like that. He would pick her up from work
and walk her home. And quite a few times they had been attacked and Spike
fought them off. Gone was his cockiness. Which she had kind of liked. She
figured he was still having trouble dealing with her.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Willow stood outside the office waiting for Spike. He had made her promise to
always wait for him. There walks never consisted of much conversation. But
for some reason he felt obligated to make sure she was all right. But he was
late tonight. He was never late. She was getting scared. She turned around to
go back into the building where it would be safe. She was a few steps away
when she was grabbed from behind and a hand covered her mouth.

"I don't think so you little bitch. You have caused us so much trouble. But
don't worry tonight it will all be over." said a voice.

Willow knew it was a vampire. She started to cry. They must have gotten
Spike. He may even be.... No, she refused to say it. She was scared. For once
in her odd life she wished Spike was there. She felt a jolt from behind and
then she was released. She turned around and saw Spike fighting off the
vampire that had attacked her. She saw two other running down the street. She
ran over to Spike.

"Spike!" she yelled. When he looked at her she tossed him a stake. He staked
the vampire and turned to face the other to that where running up to him. "Oh
no." Willow watched helplessly as Spike fought off the last two. After he
staked them she stood there. Watching him. He had saved her life. She saw him
lean onto a tree. She ran up to him.

"Stay away." he growled dangerously.

"Wh-why?" she asked rather hurt. He did do it for her right?

"I need blood. And I've lost to much already." he said still growling. The
demon was taking him over not allowing to much room for human thought. She
looked at his face. His vamp face was up of course but he looked desperate.
She saw one big gash in his side and a few other small ones. She winced. Did
she really want to do this?
"How are you going to get blood." she asked

"I have some at home." he was still growling. He sounded like an animal. "Go
home." he ordered.

She turned around and walked slowly. She wasn't sure if he would make it to
his home or not. She turned back around to see him sitting down on the ground
leaning back against the tree. She walked up to him and kneeled down. He
stared at her through his demon eyes. She held out her wrist. God she didn't
want to do this. The thought of it scared her. But she couldn't let him die
after he just saved her life.

"What the hell are you doing?!?!" he growled loudly trying to resist the
smell of her blood and the fear he smelled coming from her. He stared at the
girl. She didn't say a word. He knew she as scared. She only said three
words. "I trust you." then she shoved her wrist up to his mouth so that it
was lightly touching his lips. He couldn't resist any longer. He sunk his
teeth into her greedily not even noticing the sign of pain that flew across
her face. He wasn't aware of how much he had taken till she slumped over. He
quickly took her wrist away from his mouth and caught her before she fell
over.

"Damn girl." he said. He slid one arm behind her back and the other under her
knees and picked her up with his renewed strength. He walked into the dorm
building and walked to the girls room who was Willows friend. He kicked the
door open. Luckily she was in there. "Invite me in." he told her. "Now!"

Kim stared at Willow hanging limply in the vampires arms. She had to help
her. "Come in." he walked quickly over to her bed and laid her down.

Spike lifted the covers and tucked her under them. Something was hurting in
him he hadn't felt since Dru had left him. It was pain. Pain at seeing
someone he cared about in hurt. Her body was as limp as a ragdoll and it was
of his doing. "Keep her warm. When she wakes up don't let her up. Give her
some food to. She needs to regain her strengh." he started to walk out of the
room.

"Will she be all right?" Kim asked.

He stopped then turned around and stared at Willow. "Yes. When she wakes up
tell her I will be at her doorstep at sunset. No later and of course no
earlier." he said with a smirk. He then walked out the door.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Willow paced around her room. Kim was still against Willow meeting him. But
Willow knew he wouldn't hurt her. After all he could have left her there to
die last night. And if she didn't meet him he would probably be very unhappy.

When she had woken up she was almost delirious. She had actually asked for
Spike. What the hell was going on? She was starting to wonder herself if
there was some kind of spell on them.

A knock at the door caused her to stop in her tracks. "Oh damn." She opened
the door to see him standing there. He looked so perfect. The cuts from last
night where gone and he look as good as new. He raised his eyebrows waiting
for her to say the words. She sighed.

"Come in." she turned her back on him something she would have never done
before and walked over and sat in a chair.

"Well, doesn't this room bring back memories now doesn't it pet." he smirked.

She cringed. He was being cocky again. At the worst time of course. Speaking
of that night. She hadn't felt his lips on hers again.

"Yea I suppose. Why-why did you want to meet me here?" she asked getting down
to the point.

"Well, at the time it had seemed important but now it doesn't. Hell if you
want to get yourself killed go right ahead but don't do it on my time." he
said spitefully.

She looked at him surprised. Why was he being so mean to her? Did she do
something wrong? Or was it because he was a ruthless vampire? Maybe she had
been wrong about him.

"But I wanted to tell you that I won't be seeing you anytime soon. I'm not
going to be getting myself killed on your account ducks." he smiled at her
evilly.

Willow wanted to cry. "Wh-what do you mean."

"Did you think we actually had something? Oh how sweet. Well, let me tell you
little girl. And I put the emphasis on little girl. Don't flatter yourself.
Why would I want you?"

"I don't understand. You walked me home every night. Came busting into my
room hollering about me putting some spell on you. So there must have been
something. And then last night you brought me back. You didn't leave me to
die and you didn't drain all of my blood."

"Hey I figured since you gave that much up to me I mine as well let you live.
And anyway I don't want the slayer after my ass." he said.

Willow was hurting so bad. Why was she hurting so bad? Did she care for him
that much. It hurt. Why did it hurt? And it was getting worse. She wrapped
her arms around her stomach. "It hurts. Oh goddess it hurts so bad. Goddess
please." she pleaded and cried.

Spike watched her. Something was wrong. Why was she acting this way? Yea he
had hurt her feelings but he had to. It was the only way. He heard the door
lock. He turned around and tried to unlock it but it wouldn't budge. He
turned back to face Willow. She had fallen to the floor and was crying.

"They won't let you go." Willow said sobbing. The girl was going nuts.

"Who?" he asked.

"The goddesses. Your lying. They told me."

"Lying about what?" he asked incredulously.

"Just tell the truth and they'll stop" Willow begged. She didn't mean for it
to happen. But she asked for help and she got it.

Spike watched as little sparkles of light flew about the room. Whenever one
touched him it burned. It felt like drops of holy water.

"Shit!" he yelled backing up to the door. "Fine I lied. I told you that
because I didn't want to get you involved with me. You'll just wind up
getting hurt. Now stop all this crap!" he yelled.

Willow closed her eyes and thanked the goddesses silently. When she opened
her eyes all of the light was gone. She stood up slowly afraid he would be
mad.

"Why did you do that?" he asked rather angrily.

"I-I didn't mean to. I asked for help. I didn't know they where going to do
that." she said honestly.

"Sure." he said.

"So you um care about me?" she asked and raised her eyebrows. It felt so
weird asking him that. Especially a vampire.

"Obviously." he grumbled.

What now? She wondered. He stood there staring at her. He didn't say
anything. Was he expecting her to say something. Or maybe return his
feelings. Be brave Rosenberg for once in your life. Hell when you go back to
Sunnydale you'll have a hell of a tail to tell. She walked slowly up to him.

Spike watched her walk up to him. He knew what she was trying to do. Make the
first move. And so far she was doing okay. But what do you expect compared to
him she is a baby. Unsure and afraid. He reached out and grabbed ahold of her
hand and pulled her up to him.

Willow too a deep breath. She was so close to him. She couldn't have gotten
any closer if she wanted to. He put his hand around her neck and tilted her
head back so that she was looking him in the eyes. "Now what?" she asked.

He smirked.

"I mean what happens tomorrow or the day after." she explained.

He smiled evilly. "Whatever I want to happen." he said lowly and then claimed
her lips with his own not giving her a moment to respond.

Willow laid back in her seat on the plane. She felt so scared going home. She
looked over at Kim who was sleeping peacefully. She didn't have anything to
be worried about. She sighed. Spike said he would head up there the night
after she left. Although it would take him a little longer to get there. She
had decided that she would tell all of them alone. But not until he arrived.
If something did go wrong he wanted to be there when it did. Not half way
across the country.

Willow had been so surprised that he was the same vampire that terrorized
Sunnydale. What happened? She didn't want to think about it. She wanted to
sleep. And it didn't take her long either.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Kim I'm scared." Willow confessed to her friend for the first time. Although
a little late to be doing considering she was walking down the halls of
Sunnydale highschool.

"There your friends. They'll understand." she said in a comforting tone.

"Yea right." Willow mumbled. But she was to busy taking in her surroundings
to worry about her friends. Who would've thought something so simple in her
life that she saw everyday for four years strait could be so so so meaningful
was the best way to put it.

"So this was where you grew up huh?" Kim asked.

"Yea." was all Willow could say. She could see the library getting close and
closer. They where supposed to meet her there. When she reached the door she
could hear there voices. Kim reached to open the doors but Willow stopped
her. She just stood there and closed her eyes. She listened. They sounded the
same. She could tell who was who. It sounded the same as it did a few years
ago. She started to cry. She had made one of the worst mistakes of her life
leaving and not coming back. She had done just as they had done. She had
forgotten them just as they had done to her once or twice. Instead she did
worse. She had forgotten them for four years strait.

"Come on girl no turning back now." Kim said quietly giving her friend the
support she needed.

Willow nodded. And pushed open the door.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Everyone heard the door opened and turned around to look for a young red
headed girl. But that's not what they found. They found a young women. She
dressed pretty much the same. Her hair was about the same length. She wore a
little more make up. But it was her face. She had matured. And none of them
had taken part in it. No one moved. Not knowing how to greet the girl who
left Sunnydale and never coming back once.

Buffy was the first to react. And usually was the first one to react. She
threw down the sword she had been holding and ran towards Willow. She threw
her arms around her.

Willow hadn't been sure how to react when she first had walked into the
library, seeing them altered so much. But once she was in Buffys arms all her
fears where gone. They were still her friends still. She started to cry. "Oh
god Buffy. I'm so sorry. I should've come back. But I couldn't." she sobbed.

"Willow. Shhhh. Your back now." Before she knew what was happening Buffy had
moved away from her only to be grabbed by Xander who picked her up and spun
her around the room.

"God Willow. I missed you so much." he set her down and looked at her. Just
seeing Xanders face made her start crying. How could she have stayed away
from her lifetime friend? "Xander I'm sorry. I should have listened to you
and Buffy and come back. I didn't realize how much you all meant to me till
now."

"Hey Willow no problem. Will just throw you back in the computer chair and
everything is back to normal." he teased.

Willow smiled. She saw Cordelia standing next to him. She turned to face the
girl. Cordelia smiled and quickly put her arms around Willow. "Willow I'm
glad your back."

"Me to." Willow said still crying. She pulled away from Cordelia and searched
from Giles who was still standing in the background by the tables patiently
waiting his turn. Willow ran up to him and jumped up and hugged him.

"Giles I missed you. I wish I would have come back. I made a foolish mistake
of trying to start over. You all have been such a major part of my life." she
cried still.

"Willow don't worry. You didn't mess up anything. You decided to come back
now didn't you?" he said.

She pulled away from him and smiled. She stood back and looked at all of
them. "I don't know how I'm ever going to be able to leave again." Then she
started crying all over again. And the hugging started again along with it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After they had all finally settled down and the introductions had been made
they started to discuss why she was here and try to find out who this
mysterious person was that she had told Giles about.

"Well, I had decided to come back pretty much before now. But I had
convincing from someone else." Willow said.

"Who Willow? Remember you promised to tell me." Giles asked

"And I will. But not until the person arrives. Hey where is Angel?" she asked
just realizing that the sun had been down for some time now.

Buffy obviously just realized it to. "I-I don't know. He said he would be
here as soon as he could."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Angel started walking down the street from the manchine. Buffy had made him
promise to arrive there as soon as possible to see Willow. He walked as
quickly as he could. He slowed down when he smelled something very familiar.
He turned around to be faced with it.

"Well, hello peaches. Long time no see." Spike taunted.

Angel growled and gripped him by the throat. But Spike knocked his arm away.

"What do you want Spike?" Angel growled threateningly.

"Don't flatter yourself Angel my boy. I'm not here for you or the little
bitch. I'm here for something totally different." Spike said making sure not
to reveal to much but just enough to make the elder vampire wonder.

"What then?" Angel asked

"You'll find out soon enough. I think I'll be on my way. I have someone to go
find." he said hoping that Angel would relay the message unknowingly.

Spike turned around not giving the other vampire a chance to respond. Perfect
he thought.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Angel busted into the library. "We have a problem." he said.

"Angel. You might want to say hi." Buffy said.

He looked at her with a confused look on his face. "Wh-?" Willow stood up and
walked over to him. "Oh geez Willow I'm sorry." He bent down and hugged her.

"Nice to see you to." she teased and hugged him back. "Now tell us your
drastic news."

Angel opened his mouth to speak but shut it again when he noticed an
unfamiliar face. "What about her?" he asked and pointed to Kim.

"Oh don't worry she knows." Willow said.

Angel nodded then continued. "Spike is back."

Kim turned her head sharply to face Willow. Who was trying her best to make
her features remain calm.

"What?!?!" Buffy exclaimed. "We haven't seen him since you-" she stopped
herself not wanting to relieve the past. "It has been like five years. Why
would he be back?"

"He said it didn't have anything to do with me and you."

"Well, then it must not have anything to do with any of us." Giles said
letting out a relieved breath.

Willow laughed from the inside at there foolish assumption. She loved all of
them. But they still thought that Buffy and Angel where the most important.
Wait till they found out the truth.

"Do you think there is a new master in town?" Buffy asked.

"No. Spike isn't one to take orders. So chances are he isn't here because he
was following some master."

"But he said he had someone to go find and then he just left." Angel added.

Willows eyes popped open then she rushed towards the doors.

"Wills where you going?" Xander asked

"Oh um I need something to drink. I haven't had a thing to drink since I got
off that plane." she lied. He nodded and she walked out the doors. She looked
around the darkened hallways. Maybe she had been wrong. Then suddenly a
figure appeared in front of her.

"Spike!" she whispered. "I didn't expect to see you this soon." she wrapped
her arms around him.

"What can I say luv I have my ways." he pulled away from her and bent down
and kissed her. It only lasted a moment before Willow pulled away.

"Not here." she ordered. He pulled her around the corner of the hallway. She
leaned back against the wall. He leaned over and started kissing a trail down
her neck.

"Spike. Wh-what are you doing?" she asked hesitantly. He had never been this
intimate before. He didn't say anything. She put her hands on his chest and
pushed him back. "Spike stop!" she fussed at him quietly. He growled at being
yanked away from her neck. "Spike why is the Master after you?"

He was pulled roughly from the good mood he was in by the mention of the
Master. Angel had said something about Spike not taking orders which made her
think of something.

"Did you refuse to join the Master?" she asked softly.

"Yes. Is that all?" he asked impatiently.

She nodded not wanting to persue the subject anymore since he obviously
didn't.

"So when do we get to tell them?" he asked like a giddy school child.

"Tomorow night. But Spike I need to get back." He nodded and back up so she
could get past him.

She started walking off then turned around. "No games." she said as sternly
as she could.

He smirked at her then walked off down the hall.

"Damn." she said.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Hey I'm about ready to go home now. So me and Kim need an escort." Willow
said yawning. And noticed that Kim looked tired as well.

"All right. Me and Angel will walk you home. Cordelia you drive Xander home
and Giles well you drive home." Buffy said giving orders. She stood up and
stretched.

They all walked out together. Giles, Xander, and Cordelia all told Willow to
call them tomorrow. Willow promised that she would then her, Kim, Angel, and
Buffy where on there way.

Kim and Willow walked ahead of Buffy and Angel in deep conversation.

"Willow," Kim said softly. "From what I can tell from there reaction at
hearing about Spike he doesn't seem like such a good guy."

"Yea but you've seen him. You know he won't hurt me."

Kim didn't respond to that. "So when are you going to tell them?"

"Tomorrow night. Spike was out in the halls when I went to get drink. I knew
when Angel said he was going to look for someone that Spike would most likely
be there."

Kim looked surprised at finding out Spike had been at the school but didn't
say anything about it. "Man I'm tired." was all she said.

"Yea I know how you feel."

"What the hell are you doing here?!?" Willow heard Buffy yell. She turned
around to see Buffy and Angel face to face with Spike.

"Nothing ducks. Just saying hello to my old chums for old times sake." he
said with an evil grin.

Willow walked over to Buffy and Angel with Kim close behind.

"Willow stay back." Buffy ordered.

Willow stopped next to Angel who was standing next to Buffy. She glared at
Spike who caught her eye and smirked. Which Angel thought was directed at him.

Angel growled. "Spike I'm warning you."

Spike ignored him and walked towards Willow. She backed up trying to avoid a
confrontation with him so that she wouldn't give away any sign that something
was going on. Boy was she going to bitch at him tomorrow night.

"Well, pet, how are you doing?" he asked politely and grinned.

Willow didn't speak out of fear of them noticing something was wrong. She
just glared trying to warn him off. Either he didn't notice or was ignoring
her. But Angel soon put an end to it. He put his arm around Willow and pulled
her behind him holding her there noticing the fact that Spike had taken
interest in her all of a sudden.

Spike watched Angel put is arm around Willow and keep it there as he pulled
her behind his back. Spike growled unhappily. He could fight dear old daddy
right now for putting his hands on her. And they where still on her! Bastard!
Tomorrow night he was going to have it out with Angelus. Willow was his.
Angel had the damn slayer.

Willow watched Spike face turn from cockiness to looking furious. He had
growled as soon as Angel moved Willow. No Spike. Please. She pleaded
silently. She raised her eyebrows and made the saddest eyes she could to beg
him to stop. She mouthed the word please. He stared at her for a moment then
regained control of himself.

"Well, kids. Guess I'll be seeing you." he said cheerfully once again and
turned around and walked off into the night in search of food. Of course he
wouldn't tell Willow that.

Willow stayed up late that night hoping Spike would show his evil face.

"I can't believe him." she complained to Kim. "He isn't taking any of this
seriously. It is a big game to him. A way to hurt them all more."

"Well you knew this was going to happen. Look Willow I hate to state the
obvious but he is an evil vampire that just happens to be hopelessly devoted
to you. What do you expect?" she stated more then asked.

"Yea I know. But still. He didn't have to do what he did tonight. I am so
upset about that." she said trying to make Kim see her side.

Kim just shrugged. "I'm going to bed. And you better to. If he comes I'm sure
he'll make his presence known."

"Yea probably." she mumbled. She got in on the other side of the bed and
reached over to turn out the light never to be awakened by Spike.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Damn him!" Willow yelled on there way to meet Buffy and Cordelia and Buffys
house. Buffy had called early that morning telling her they where going to
have a girls day out. "I can't believe he didn't come!"

Kim laughed. "First you complain about him coming twice last night and now
you complain about him not coming."

"I didn't want to see him in front of everyone else. You know what I mean.
And I wanted him to come last night so I could yell at him." she said angrily.

Kim just laughed at her friends distress.

They arrived to Buffys house just as Cordelia pulled up. Buffy ran out and
hugged Willow still ecstatic she was there then said hello to Kim.

"All right who's car are we taking?" Buffy asked.

"You drive." Cordelia said. "I have been driving us like six years. I need a
break." she complained.

"You big ninny." Buffy said and pulled her keys out of her purse and walked
towards her car.

"I am not big!" Cordelia yelled after her. She turned back to Willow and Kim.
"Well lets go. It's the beginning of summer. Lots of sales." she turned and
followed Buffy.

Kim turned to Willow and raised her eyebrows. Willow shook her head. "Don't
ask."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They had all congregated that night in the library. Willow knew it was time.
Everyone was there. Even Angel. Oh yea he'll be thrilled. She barely listened
to the conversation that was going on around her. Even Kim was talking away
and not shutting up. But Willow didn't have the urge to talk. She stood up
and walked towards the counter. No one even noticed.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spike had been waiting here since Angel had arrived. He had followed the
bloody wanker there form the manchine. He was going to take things into his
own hands. And chances are things weren't going to be pretty. His main reason
for being there was to protect Willow. They wouldn't hurt her physically. But
he was going to protect her from the verbal battle that would begin. But he
was going to wait till she was ready to tell. He noticed her get up and walk
towards the counter and stare at them silently. "It's time." he said happily
also looking forward to seeing there reactions.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Um guys." Willow said not high enough to get there attention. Kim noticed.
She had been waiting since they arrived for this to happen. She looked at
Willow and smiled weakly. Willow smiled back.

"Hey yall!" Kim yelled knowing that Willow wasn't in the mood for yelling
right now. They turned to face her. "I think Willow is going to tell us
something."

"All right I'm-I'm going to tell you who this mysterious person is." she said
slowly trying her best to remain calm.

"Well hell you bloody wankers long time no see!" Spike yelled at them busting
through the doors. He walked over to them all.

"Spike I've had enough of this. Tonight I am going to vacuum with a dust
buster." Buffy spit out.

"Ah wait. Before we start fighting I have something to say." he said and
looked at Willow and smiled. She was surprised, scared, then angry. She was
glaring at him. Obviously angry for intruding again. He grinned evilly then
walked up to her quickly and slid his hand behind her neck and kissed her
roughly.

Willows surprise stopped her from any rational thought. The only thing she
knew was that Spike was kissing her. So she kissed back welcoming him by
opening her mouth. After a couple of seconds though reality started to hit
her as she heard a growl from another vampire, a stake being picked up, and a
few gasps. She put her hands up and pushed Spike away. She took a deep breath
before she could allow her self to talk. And when words did come out they
where loud and angry.

"What the hell are you doing?!?!?" she screamed in Spikes face. Everyone was
to surprised to react at seeing the small girl screaming at a well-known and
feared vampire.

"What does it look like pet?" Spike said getting angry to.

"I was going to tell them! that was the deal." She noticed everyone else
staring. Damn she thought. Should she stop now and explain to everyone calmly
or finish yelling at Spike for last night? She needed to get the yelling out
first.

"Yea well I figured you needed a little help." he said and growled.

"Oh yeah. That is the last thing I need from you after last night. You
showing up early and then terrorizing everyone! Do you know how hard it was
to not give anything away!"

"Maybe I should stop helping you then Willow." he never used her name. He
must be pretty angry then she thought. Good. "Maybe I should have stopped
helping you a long time ago and let you get killed those two times in New
York. And lets not for get about the times I walked you home and a vampire
attacked or the times when I followed you home to protect you!"

All right fine maybe she did need his help. But she didn't get a word in. He
continued.

"And while we are on the subject of last night I have something to clear up."
he said calmly.

Willow looked at him oddly not understanding his meaning. Spike turned around
to face Angel in full vamp face. Angel vamped out to. Spike pulled back his
fist and punched Angel with everything he had. Angel was knocked back onto
the table. "Don't you ever touch her again you fairy!" Spike growled at Angel.

Angel got up and moved towards Spike but Buffy held him back not wanting to
anger Spike anymore out of fear that he would hurt Willow since he was
standing next to her again.

"What are you talking about?!?!" Angel growled angerly at him.

"Don't play stupid. Last night when you where walked her and her friend
home." Spike growled back.

"Oh jeez Spike. He thought you where going to kill me. He was just trying to
protect me." Willow said.

"Well I'll do the protecting around here." he said and slid back into human
face.

"What is going on here!?!?" Giles yelled.

Willow swallowed. "I think it is time to explain." she turned to Spike. "With
no help from you."

"Fine."

Willow sat down a told them of everything that happened in New York. Leaving
out there odd relationship.

"Two questions." Xander said realizing what the answer was but not ready to
admit it. "Why did they keep coming after you even though you weren't
involved and why the hell did he kiss you?"

"Well mate."Spike finally spoke up. "Me and her are shagging. It is as simple
as that." he said knowing that would start a fight and grinned.

Willow couldn't handle this. She heard Angel growl then lunge towards Spike.
But she didn't stop him. Maybe he would knock some since into the stupid
vampire. She sat down and closed her eyes. Kim patted Willows hand trying to
give her support. Willow didn't watch. She couldn't. Spike was just playing
games.

"No!" Kim yelled.

Willows eyes flew open to see Angel holding Spike against the wall and Buffy
running for a stake.

Willow jumped out of her chair and flung herself around Spike while Kim ran
after Buffy to stop her from bringing the stake.

"Willow get away!" Angel yelled.

Willow shook her head still clinging onto Spike. Buffy finally got over by
Angel after getting away from Kim. But Kim followed her but didn't stand next
to Angel and Buffy. She walked over to where Spike and Willow where.

"Angel let him go." Buffy pleaded with Spike. She saw what Angel didn't just
now. Spike wasn't going to hurt Willow.

Angel turned and looked at her then released his grip on Spike.

Spike growled ready to start fighting again.

"Spike please." Willow begged still hanging on to him.

Spike looked down at Willow. He contemplated on weather pushing Willow to the
side or doing as she asked. He decided to listen to her. He slid back into
his human form. Willow let out a deep breath.

"Thank you." she said softly. She let go of him. "Now tell them that isn't
true."

He smiled then looked back at everyone else. "Nah she is still as pure as the
driven snow." Everyone looked relieved. Then he looked down at her "As far as
I know." Willow blushed then turned back around to everyone but stayed in
front of Spike.

"Look as I explained more then once earlier Spike has saved my life. And we
have kind of become involved. Just not like he said."

Everyone stayed silent.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A few minutes later everyone had left and went home. Willow insisted that she
would be fine with Spike and he walked her and Kim home. Kim had went inside
leaving Willow and Spike outside.

"I don't appreciate all of that." Willow said.

"Yea but they had to see for themselves. Now go inside." he said.

"Now?" she asked.

"I'll be back later."

"All right." Willow said and walked inside to wait for Spike to return

Spike dug his hands deep into the pockets of his trenchcoat. He had passed up
many worthy candidates for dinner but he just didn't feel the urge to stop
any. He was feeling an emotion that wasn't good for any vampire. Guilt. How
he despised the emotion. He had had some of it before but never guilty
because of a human. And his guilt was causing him to go without dinner to
night. "Bloody hell." he spoke out causing a few unsuspecting warm blooded
people to turn. He'll have to have dinner out of a damn baggy tonight. He
felt to guilty to even take a life. And it was because of Willow. He gave up
for that night and turned around and made his way back to Willows house like
promised he would.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Willow sat on the chair on her balcony with her eyes closed. It was 3 in the
morning. Or it was a little while ago. And he still wasn't here. She was
getting tired. Kim had went to sleep about an hour ago deciding there was no
reason for her to be staying up. She started feeling herself drifting off
knowing she should be going inside. But she couldn't get herself to wake back
up.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spike looked up at Willows room. The light was off and he contemplated on
whether to wake her up or just let her sleep. But chances are she would be
upset if he didn't see her tonight. He started walking towards the trelice
that was by her balcony when he heard a movement that wouldn't have been
caught by human ear. He stepped back slowly and quietly and slid behind a
tree. He watched quietly for the next few minutes waiting to see if someone
was there. If it was Angel he was going to rip his throat out. He was
starting to think he was going crazy when a figured stepped out from behind a
bush and made its way silently towards her balcony. Spike didn't hear a
heartbeat which meant that it was a vampire. Spike slipped into game face.
His temper was flaring up. That vampire was after Willow. He followed the
vampire and waited for it to clime up the trelice. He wanted to catch the
damn thing in the act. He stopped climbing when he reached the balcony and
stayed there watching the vampire waiting to hop over the railing. The stupid
vampire made its way towards a figure sleeping on a chair. What is wrong with
that girl?!?! Spike yelled to himself. She must have been waiting for him and
fallen asleep. When he thought the vampire had gotten far enough he growled
loudly and hopped over the railing.

Willow awoke with a start to the sound of growling and fighting. She jumped
up and backed away into the closed door. She saw Spike and caught a glimpse
of another vampire. How could she have been so stupid?!?! She was going to
get Spike killed with her foolishness. She watched Spike kick and punch the
vampire till he finally had it on the ground then he gripped it by its throat
and picked it up off the ground.

"Who sent you here?" Spike growled furiously.

"Go to hell!" the vampire spat out.

Spike grabbed the vampire right hand and twisted it until many bones in the
wrist broke. The vampire let out a pitiful howl and Willow cringed at the
sound. She heard the door open up and she turned to see Kim standing there
staring wide eyed at the site she woke up to.

"I'm not going to ask you again. You tell me who you are working for or I
break every bone in your body till you answer. And then if you don't tell me
after that, which I'm sure you will, I could always revert back to old habits
and use some spikes."

The vampire glared at him still not answering. Spike grabbed ahold of the
same wrist he had broken just seconds ago and twisted it causing the foolish
vampires arm to break.

"The Master! The Master sent me!" the vampire yelled.

Fear started to rise inside Willow. She didn't think they would be here this
soon.

"Why?" Spike said grabbing the other wrist. He knew the answer but he wanted
to hear it from the vampire.

"He wanted the girl. He was going to turn her. He said that by doing that you
would come back and join him if she was there." the vampire spilled out.

Spike growled. He thought the Master just wanted to hold Willow hostage. But
the Master wasn't stupid. If Spike where to get Willow back he wouldn't stay
there with the Master. But by the Master himself turning Willow she would
stay faithful to him because he would be her sire. And the only way for Spike
to have Willow would be for him to go work for the Master. But he would stake
Willow before he let that happen.

"You aren't going to get her. And you can go tell your Master that. I don't
care if I have to hunt down every vampire that works for him he will not get
her. And then I will hunt him down and rip out his bloody throat out. And you
can tell him that!" Spike yelled and then threw the vampier over the balcony.
He watched the vampire run off down the street.

Kim watched wide eyed then took a deep breath and went inside knowing they
needed to be alone.

Spike turned to Willow. Still angry and powered up by the fight he couldn't
control his temper. "What in bloody hell where you doing outside!" he yelled
at the frightened girl.

Willow wanted to yell at him. And she normally would knowing that he wouldn't
hurt her. But the earlier events still fresh in her mind the fight, hearing
that the Master planned on turning her, and seeing Spike so angry scared her.
He didn't remind her of the vampire she had gotten to know the past month. He
reminded her of the evil vampire that had come to Sunnydale threatening
everyone's lives. The same one that threatened to shove a broken bottle in
her face. She didn't like that Spike. But the problem was he was that Spike.
And what was to stop him from ever hurting her?

Spike grabbed her arms and shook her roughly not even noticing his own
strength and forgetting for the moment that she was only human. "How could
you be so stupid?!? Do you think I am always going to be around to protect
you? You of all people should be aware of the dangers going on around you!
You aren't the slayer. Compared to a vampire or a slayer you are weak."

Willow winced at how roughly he was squeezing her arms. But not only that but
his words. That was the worst thing he could say to her. That she was weak.
But she didn't complain. She didn't want to make him any more angry then he
already was.

Spike let go over her. He was still in game face giving away how angry he
was. He let go over her. "Get inside." he growled.

She stared at him for a moment hoping that he would reconsider and talk this
through with her. But she could see that it wouldn't be tonight. She nodded
and turned around and went inside and closed the door. When she turned back
to look through the door he was gone. She went into her bed and finally let
the tears fall.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spike jumped off her balcony. He was to upset with her to speak to her. She
disgusted him just then. The weakness in her had made him sick. He had gotten
tired of weakness. Dru was like that. Although she hadn't been weak well
unless you count the time when she was sick. But she loved to be pampered and
taken care of. He didn't want to have to take care of Willow. But what did he
expect. She was human. If he wanted a strong human then he would have to have
the slayer and he bloody well wasn't going to have her. He turned the corner
and found a man and a woman walking down the street. Perfect.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Willow walked into the library that morning with a jacket on. To cover the
bruises from Spike last night. Things weren't going as she had planned. For
some reason she thought Spike would act different towards her. But what could
she expect right? He was a soulless vampire. But would he hurt her again? She
didn't know. She sat down and kept quite while everyone else talked amongst
themselves. She had made a decision. And it was for her own good.

"Hey yall I gotta do something." she said and stood up grabbing her purse.

"What?" Kim asked.

"You'll find out." she said and then walked out.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Angel was awakened by the sound of banging on his door. He got up and slipped
on some pants and a shirt and walked over to the door. He opened it up
carefully not knowing who it was at this time of day. When the person was in
and he closed the door he was surprised to be faced with Willow.

"Willow. Um. What are you doing here?" Angel asked confused.

Willow didn't say anything. She took off her jacket and stood there waiting
for him to notice.

Angel watched her as she shed her jacket and dropped it on the floor and
stood in front of him. He looked her over trying to figure out what she was
doing. Then he noticed the big purple and blue bruises that surrounded each
arm above the elbows. He ran up to her and grabbed her arms gently. "Willow
what happened?" he asked sternly while turning over each arm. His experience
told him that the bruises where caused by a person. He looked at Willow. She
had tears rolling down her face.

"I need your help." she finally spoke up.

"Spike?" he asked.

She nodded not being able to get a response past her throat.

He showed her the way to the couch and sat down with her.

"Willow tell me what happened." he said softly.

She explained everything and he listened patiently. Angel was actually
starting to believe Spike liked Willow. And he still may like Willow. But the
problem was that Spike was a vampire and didn't have a soul like him. And
Spike wasn't exactly you everyday vampire. After all he was sired by Angelus.
So Spike could be a little violent.

"So what do you need me for?" Angel asked still not understanding his
involvement in the matter.

"Angel this won't stop. I know he didn't mean it. And I know it is foolish to
say that. But at the same time I also know it could happen again. After all
it is his nature." she sighed still wondering if this was the right choice.
"I need you to-to. Oh god I can't say it. It feels so terrible."

"Willow it's okay." he said giving her his support.

"Angel I don't know how to go about this whole thing. But I know it won't
stop. So I am going to guarantee it does stop. I-I can't be around him any
longer. I guess you could say I'm breaking up with him." she laughed
pitifully then she turned serious again. "You know Spike and not only do I
need you to protect me from him if it comes to that but-but I need it to look
like I don't care for him anymore."

"How are you going to do that?" he asked. She obviously had a plan in mind.

"I want to move in here." she said quickly.

"Willow...." Angel said not sure if it was such a good idea.

"Angel I'm not asking you to act like we are together. Just don't kiss all
over Buffy if Spike is around. But I know that if I'm here with you he'll
think I have a thing for you now."

"I thought you cared for him?"

"Oh god Angel I do. I hurt so bad right now. And I'm not sure if this is the
right decision. But I'm also scared of him now. And if I'm scared then it
isn't right."

Angel nodded. She shouldn't be scared.

"Willow the only problem is, is that this may not be the best idea. I think
this would make Spike angry the most. And believe me he gets jealous." Angel
was referring to the time when he lost his soul. Spike was very upset that
Angelus had Dru wrapped around his finger. He went as far as to team up with
the slayer.

"I know that. And that scares me to. But this is the best way to make him
think I don't care and for you protect me at the same time."

Angel looked at her. He had to help her now before things got worse. Hell
they where already pretty bad. He felt terrible just watching the silent
tears just run down her face. He made Spike and he supposed it should be his
job to protect her from him.

"Alright."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Willow had explained to everyone. And a plan had been set for Spike to find
out. She saw Buffy get up silently and walk out of the library. She got up
and ran after her and caught up with her in the halls.

"Buffy. I'm sorry." she said when caught up with her.

"Willow why Angel?" she asked softly hurt by Willows choice of plans.

"I thought it would be best. But Buffy I'm only going to be staying at his
house. I won't even touch him I swear. But if I was to stay with you then it
would seem a little weird considering that I'm supposed to like Angel. And
Angel was the only guy I could use. Spike would kill Xander. And Spike
already doesn't trust Angel so it will seem real. Buffy I just need to make
sure I'm safe. Spike scared me so much last night. And he hurt me inside and
out. I can't allow that to happen. I shouldn't have allowed it to go this
far. I just thought I was different." she started crying all over again.

Buffy forgave Willow right away at seeing her sincerity and pulled her into
her arms.

"Buffy I really do care for Spike." she sobbed. "And for a moment I thought
it could be lo-." she stopped herself. "But I will not be weak. I am going to
stop this before anyone gets hurt."

Buffy pulled away. "Willow you aren't weak. Your stronger then me. If I would
have done that with Angel maybe we would have had a lot less problems and Ms.
Calendar would be alive right now."

"But Buffy, Angel has helped us so much."

"Yea but still." Buffy had always wondered if it would have been better to
end it in the beginning. There was no future in it. And Willow was better to
make a clean break early.

Willow started sobbing uncontrollably. "I just can't have you upset with me.
I can't do this alone."

"Willow you aren't alone."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Willow and Angel sat outside on her balcony waiting. Angel had went through
the sewer while the sun was setting and when it was down he ran to Willows
house so he would beat Spike there. Willow knew that Spike would be back that
night and Angel agreed. Kim had already left. She was staying with Buffy.
Willows decided it would be safer if she was there. The worst place she could
be is with Angel and Willow and she would be safe with Buffy anyway since she
was the slayer.

"He's coming." Angel said breaking the silence.

Willow took a deep breath. She couldn't see him yet but Angel could see much
better then she could.

"Willows its not to late to turn back." he said.

"No. In the long run it will be better."

He nodded and they walked out her room.

When Willow had gotten outside she could finally see Spike. And she was
positive he saw them to.

"Willow I wont let him hurt you."

"Angel if you have to protect me then this is for the best right?"

He nodded and then they started walking in the direction of the manchine.
What just happened to me the same direction Spike was coming from.

"Willow don't say anything now. He will hear you." Angel whispered.

Willow nodded. When they got close to Spike Willow put her acting face on.
She scooted closer to Angel. They both started slowing down which they would
have done anyway if this was really happening.

"What the bloody hell is going on here?" Spike growled angrily.

Willow knew her face gave away her fear. But at least it worked for the part
she was playing.

"She is coming with me Spike." Angel said.

"Like hell she is." he said then reached for Willow who stepped back behind
Angel and he blocked Spike. Spike looked furious.

"Spike he is serious. Last night after you left Angel came by." by the look
on his face when she said that she wanted to cry. "You hurt me last night
Spike." she said shakily.

"I hurt you???? I damn well saved your bloody life."

She stepped out from behind Angel and put her arms out so he could see. Spike
didn't show any symptoms of remorse which hurt her more. Didn't he care?

"Angel was gentle with me. Spike you where rough." she said as bravely as she
could.

"So now you are moving in with soul boy?" he said angrily.

She nodded.

Spike switched into game face and growled.

"She's is mine now Spike. Give it up." Angel said growling back. Then he
grabbed Willow gently by the arm and went around Spike.

After they where a safe distance away Spike switched back. "I don't think so."

Spike was pissed off to say the least. And in the mean time he was hurt. He
hoped that little witch knew that she was the cause of a few deaths this
evening. He smiled evilly. Maybe he would let her know. He was trying to
figure out the best approach to this. Kill her. Which he didn't think he
could do. Kidnap her. A possibility. Although it would be hard it could
probably be done. The only problem was is that she wouldn't be willing and
that would be no fun. He could force her but he cared to much to do that.
Then there was the other option. He could pull and old Angelus trick. Drive
her crazy. It was a nice idea but he didn't need another nutty vampire on his
hands and he liked Willow the way she was. So he really didn't have very many
choices. He couldn't have had her forever right? She would grow old and die
someday. He could turn her so she would live forever but he didn't want a
vampire Willow.

Spike stopped. He realized he had walked to the cemetery. He listened he
could hear someone walking. He jumped over the fence and followed the smell
of blood. "Great." he said when he saw who it was.

"So pet? How could you let this happen?"

Damn he knew. How could she pull this off. She wasn't prepared to confront
him. Buffy reached deep down inside her and found the part of her that was
scared as hell that something was going to happen with Willow and Angel. Then
she imagined it happening. Now she was prepared to face Spike. She turned
around.

"I didn't want it to happen." she said solemnly. Damn this was hard.

"So then why don't you just go stake him?" he asked.

"Could you kill Willow?" she flung his question back in his face. He didn't
answer. "I didn't think so."

"I will get her back." he said decidedly.

Buffy felt sorry for him all of a sudden. Not only for the fact that he
thought he would get Willow back but the fact that he genuinely cared about
her but he couldn't control his demon. "Tell the demon that." Buffy said then
walked off.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Willow was having a dream. And for some reason she knew it was a dream. It
was like she was watching a movie but with no sound. No one talked but she
knew how they felt.
The first thing she saw was the library. Giles was the only one in there and
he looked so sad. Willow saw the doors open and Jenny Calendar walked in.
Giles didn't look the least bit surprised. He just stared at her. Jenny
walked up to him and handed him a yellow disk. Giles looked surprised then he
looked ecstatic. He ran for the computer then put it in then Jenny
disappeared.

The scene before her faded away and then she saw a vampire. But she couldn't
make out who it was or if she even knew the vampire. She could see it's eyes
though perfectly. They where yellow. Then a light flashed in the pupils of
its eye and it screamed. Then the dream ended and Willow woke up. She looked
at the time. 3:46 A.M. She jumped out of the bed Angel had let her sleep in
and ran to the phone. She had an idea of what to do but Buffy would know for
sure. She was the only one that had seen it happen.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Willow woke up early that morning knowing what she had to do. She ran over to
Giles house as soon as she had gotten dressed. She knocked furiously on his
door. It opened slowly to reveal a half asleep Giles.

"Giles we need to talk. I had a dream."

"Wait what happened with Spike last night?" Giles asked still trying to wake
up.

Willow looked surprised. That whole morning she had been in such a rush that
she didn't even think about Spike. Reality was rushing back to her.

"Oh um fine." she said. "Just perfect." she whispered.

"Okay good. Now what about a dream?" he asked walking into the kitchen to
make some tea.

"Oh well last night I was having this dream." she followed him into the
kitchen. "And it was like I was watching a movie. You where in the library
all sad and then Jenny walked in." She saw the shock in Giles face but kept
going. "And handed you a yellow disk. You got all happy then got on the
computer. Then there was another scene with a vamp that I couldn't make out
but I saw its eyes and there was a flash of light through them. The vamp
screamed then the dream ended. I woke up and had an idea of what it meant."
she said.

"What?" Giles asked.

"Let me finish. I called Buffy she confirmed my thoughts. The light flashing
through the eyes was a vamp getting it's soul back. The same happened with
Angel. The light flashing in the eyes thingy. The disk Jenny handed you was
the restoration spell." she explained.

"How do you know that it was the restoration spell?"

"It was a subtle hint and I doubt any of you would have caught on. But
remember I am the one that found the restoration spell which just happened to
be on a yellow disk. And since in my dream it was coming from Jenny that just
supported my theory. Also leading me to believe that I should give this to
you." she reached into her pocket and pulled out a yellow disk.

"What's this?" he asked but was pretty sure what he was holding in his hands.

"The restoration spell. This is the same disk. Who would have known it would
have come in handy so soon." she stated.

"But we may not even have to use this." Giles said trying to ease the worry
building up inside of him.

"But is better to be safe then sorry. You know that Giles."

He nodded.

"Giles hide it. And don't tell anyone where it is. Even me. If someone is
turned and they know where the disk is there is no hope left."

"Do you think it will be Angel?"

Willow shook her head. "No. It just didn't seem right. And I think Angel and
Buffy would know better this time."

Giles poured his tea. "What about Spike?"

She had thought about giving him his soul back a bunch of times since the
other night. But if he then he would have tremendous guilt on him no doubt.
Even though from what she could tell he was a killer before. "No. For two
reasons. Spike is already a vampire. If we where to give him his soul back
why later? Why not now? But then there is also the fact in my dream that you
where really sad Giles. Why would you be sad for Spike?"

He nodded understanding her meaning.

"But Giles please take care of this disk. The only other person that knows is
Buffy. And no one else needs to know. We can't take the chance of you getting
hurt because you have the spell. But I need to head over to Buffys. Since I
can't see her and Kim tonight we are going to do some stuff today."

"Alrgiht." he said and followed her to the door.

"Giles be careful." Willow warned and closed the door behind her.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Willow sat on her new bed. She was bored to death. In New York she would be
out doing something. Here she would usually be at the library. But it
wouldn't work with the plan. She looked at her watch. It had been 40 minutes
since sunset. Angel had hurried through the tunnels while the sun was setting
to talk to Giles. He said he would hurry back. But he still wasn't here. She
heard the door open and close. She rushed down the stair of the big mansion
(better Charibob?) to meet Angel and find out what was going on. After all a
vampire couldn't come in right?

When she neared the bottom all the lights where out. "Wait a minute. The
lights weren't out earlier."

"No, they weren't" said a voice from behind her.

"Oh no."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spike had been stalking outside Willows house for sometime now waiting to see
if she would come back. He saw a figure walking towards him and recognized
who it was. How couldn't you? You could smell his foul stench from miles away.

"What do you want soul boy?" Spike asked Angel angrily.

"I'm on my way home." Angel said flatly not wanting to start a fight with
Spike. He was already kind of late as it was.

"A little late for someone who is supposed to be protecting her."

Angel ignored him and started walking again. Spike yanked him back and Angel
growled.

"Watch out Spike my boy. It's just you and me now. No, Buffy and no Willow to
stop us." Angel growled at Spike waiting for him to make the first move.

"Well, I doubt the slayer would be here right?" Spike said.

Angel didn't answer.

"You know you bloody bastard I used to like you in the early days. You where
fun. Hey I loved the violence just as much as any vampire. But then you took
Dru away from me. I had her. I did everything I could for her and then boom
your back in our life one day and you had her. And then I lost her because of
my truce with the slayer. Which was your fault. And then one day she told me
that she had no one left. Her precious daddy was back at the slayers feet and
that I had turned soft working with the slayer against you. For that one
moment she saw clearly. What a pity to. Cause she decided to take a little
stroll into the sun." Spike growled and switched into game face. Replaying
the events in his mind made him furious.

Angel was surprised. He thought something had happened. When you have a
childe as old and as dear as Dru was, you feel it when they die. He just
hadn't been sure what happened. But at least now one of his mistakes where
gone.

"Now you have Willow. My Willow. Who I would do anything for. I watched her
everynight to make sure she would stay alive and I would have followed the
Master to the ends of the earth and rip out is throat if he ever hurt her."

Angel didn't respond. He actually felt bad for Spike. He didn't know the
truth. Which was that Willow stilled cared for him.

Spike went back to him human face. "Get back to her. Your late enough
already." then he walked off.

"Damn." Angel said unbelievably and walked to the mansion.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Angel walked into his dark mansion and called for Willow. He got no response.
He reached for the light switch and waited for his eyes to adjust. He called
again but got no response. He walked towards the stairs that led up towards
her room but was stopped by a piece of paper taped onto the stairs with a
note on it written in blood. It read:

Bring Spike or you don't get the girl.

Angel brought the paper up to his face and smelled it and if he had a beating
heart it would have stopped at the smell of whose blood it was. "Willow."

The fledging walked back into the main hall where the Master was. He had tied
the girl up in the closet after the human, that worked for the Master, had
brought her back.

"Master the girl is here and is tied up."

"Great." the Master looked up from his position at the head of the table. He
was surrounded by other vampires sitting around him. All where in high
places. Spike would have been to if he would have stayed. But Spike hadn't
liked the idea of world domination.

The fledging turned and walked out.

"Master." said a vampire sitting at the table. "Wouldn't it had made more
since for us to ask for Angelus? He is stronger and older then Spike."

The Master nodded. "Yes, that's true. But he has a soul. Even though the girl
was living with Angel, Spike still cared for her. It is better this way."

"Are you going to turn her?" asked another vampire.

"Of course. If he says that he will help us and we give her back to him
unharmed what is to stop him from leaving? When this is all over I'll have a
surprisingly smart witch as a vampire, a strong vampire, and a crippled
slayer. Gentleman we will win this time and there is nothing to stop us."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Angel and Buffy had went to seek out Spike while the others waited back at
the library. It had taken them a couple of hours to locate where he was
staying but they where able to do it. When they reached his place they busted
into it without any hesitation.

"Man I hope he is here." Buffy said to herself not expecting any response.
They had wasted enough time trying to find him.

"What do you want?" Spike growled lowly in the darkened room they had just
went into.

"We need your help." Buffy said. "They took-"

"Willow." Spike finished for her. "Yea I know."

"Then why are you just sitting here?"

Spike stood up and turned on the light. Buffy jumped back towards Angel at
the sight of the angry vamp in game face.

"Because she threw me out of her life! Why am I going to go save her ass
again! She bloody well didn't appreciate it all the other times!" he picked
up a clock a threw it at the wall. "Bring a stake with you though." Spike
said and laughed angrily.

"Why?" Angel asked.

"Because when you get there you are going to need it."

"Of course we will need it. But why tell us?" Buffy asked knowing there is
something in his statement.

"Because you'll need to stake Willow. She is going to be vamped. That was how
the Master was going to make me stay. If he was her sire she would stay
faithful to him. Meaning if I wanted to be near her I would have to go there."

"Then you have to help us! You can't let that happen!!!" Buffy yelled
desperately.

"No!!! She wanted me out of her life. So I'm staying out!" he yelled back.

Buffy looked at Angel. He knew what she was thinking.

"It was a lie. It was all a lie." Angel stated.

Spike glared at them both and walked slowly towards Angel.

"What was?" Spike growled lowly.

"Me and her. We did it because you had hurt her that night. She said you had
told the truth. She was weak. And she was scared of you. So the plan was was
for her to stay with me to make you think that we had a thing. She doesn't
like me. She likes you."

Spike growled loudly and turned and punched the stone wall. "She kicked me
out of her life!!! Why should I help her?!?!?"

"Because you don't want a vampire Willow. We've seen it and it isn't pretty."
She saw that Spike didn't understand her. "Look I don't have time to explain.
But you don't want it to happen. Vampire Willow is strong deceitful and
smart. She could have a revolt started amongst the vampire in less then an
hour. And none of us would be able to make ourselves kill her. You may not
want to see her afterwards but you must help us stop her from becoming a
vampire."

"Alright."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Willow sat in the chair unable to move or talk. She had been untied and taken
to a large room with a large table. There was food laid out for her to eat
but she wouldn't touch it. The Master vampire sat at the head of the table.
She sat next to him. He sat there sipping his wine quietly. He had ordered
all of the vampires out of the room so they sat there by themselves.

"You know it is taking longer then I would have thought for Spike to get
here." he waited for a response from the girl but she didn't answer.

"Maybe I was wrong and he won't come for you."

She still didn't say anything. She just stared strait ahead. He hoped she was
a funnier vampire then human.

"But that is only half of my plan. You see I have happened to get my hands on
some great information. I have been told through some mysterious occurrence
you had a double here. But not just another Willow but a vampire Willow," he
saw the girl stiffen. Wonderful. He stood up and walked slowly and stopped
behind the girl. He laid his hands on her shoulder and pulled her up. He felt
her start to shake. He loved this part. "And well from what I hear she just
wasn't a very nice vampire. Are have I been misinformed? I hope not. But I
think it is time to find out. Don't you?"

Willow started to cry. When was Buffy going to make her famous 'just in time
to save you' entrance? She felt his fangs start to brush against her skin.
Maybe this is what her dream was about. Her. His fangs pierced her skin. She
felt the blood leaving her body and herself becoming weaker. The last thing
she thought about was the sun before everything went blank.

"All right we do it my way or I leave." Spike ordered.

Everyone looked a little hesitant at first but finally agreed. Willows life
depended on it.

"So what is your way?" Buffy asked as she followed Spike to a window and
spied in.

"Easy. Split up. You take Giles and Kim. Angel takes Cordelia and Xander and
I go by myself."

"Do you think that's wise?" Buffy asked referring to him going by himself.

"It's my way or no way." he reminded her.

"Fine." Buffy went back to the others and separated them all into groups.

She stood facing the others. "All right this is the deal. We go in and save
Willow. That's all there is to it."

"Wh-what if she is already a vampire?" Kim brought up the question that no
one wanted to say out loud.

Buffy took a deep breath and went to speak but Giles interrupted her. "Don't
kill her." he ordered.

"But-but Giles Willow is my best friend but we can't just let her kill us."
Xander said.

"Willow gave me the restoration spell. She knew this was going to happen." he
said revealing the secret.

Spike switched into game face and grabbed Giles by his neck. Buffy ran up to
stop him but Spike pushed her back "What do you mean she knew!"

"Sh-she had this dream that Jenny gave me the restoration spell on the exact
same yellow disk that was used to restore Angels soul. After that she saw a
vamp get it's soul back. But she didn't know it was going to be her."

"So you'll give her a soul?" Spike asked with hope filling his voice.

Giles nodded. Spike let him go.

"Come on people lets move." Buffy said. She turned to Angel and said. "Good
luck." she said.

He smiled at her and leaned down and kissed her. "You to."

"All right lets go save Willow." Buffy said and they all head in there
different directions.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Willow sat up. She looked around. She was in a bedroom. She looked down at
what she was wearing. "Ick." She stood up and went over to the door. She
yanked on it but it was solid steel. "Fuck." She looked around trying to find
something to help her escape when she caught a glimpse of something on the
bed. "Ooooo." she walked over and picked it up and held it up to her and
walked over to the mirror. What looked back at her surprised her. "Damn it.
Aint that a bitch." She kicked the blank mirror and it shattered.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy walked slowly through the shadows with Giles and Kim behind her. She
ran into something hard and heard a growl. "Crap."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Angel, Xander, and Cordelia had come in the back entrance and where supposed
to meet in the maim room. Angel leaded the others through the dark building.
"All right I think we're almost there." Angel said but got no response. When
he turned around he saw Xander and Cordelia being held be two vampires and
four others surrounding them. He sighed and followed them.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spike crept down the halls. He was by himself thank god. He tried picking up
the smell of Willows blood but he couldn't find him. That made him worried.
As he was walking along a vampire stepped out in front of him.

"This way." it said.

Spike could have easily beat its ass. But he didn't know where the hell he
was going. Spike nodded and followed the vampire. When he walked into the
room he saw the rest of the group surrounded by more then enough vampires.

"Yea Spike this was a great idea." Buffy said sarcastically.

Before Spike could come up with a witty remark someone else spoke up.

"Shut up!" Spike looked over at the sound of the voice.

"Bloody hell." Spike mumbled.

"Well, hello my boy." the Master said and stood up from his chair.

"Boy my ass. I'm older then you." Spike said.

"Yes, well who is incharge." the Master gloated. "Well, lets see who we have
over here." the Master said and walked over to the others. He stopped at
Angel first. "Well, if it isn't Angelus. I would feel honored if it wasn't
for the fact you had a soul." Angelus just stared at him. The Master sighed
and moved on he past up the others till he came to the Slayer. "Well, hello.
Aren't you cute." Buffy glared. "I bet you have a really bad temper don't
you?" she didn't get a chance to answer because Spike but in.

"Enough with the bloody chit chat. Where is Willow?"

"Isn't that an interesting question. Well, I wouldn't want to keep you
waiting. Willow!!!" the Master called.

The person that stepped out of the doorway wasn't the girl they had known.
She was clad in tight black leather pants, black high heeled boots, a black
leather strapless tops that laced up the front. And she was as pale as a
ghost which clashed against the blood red lips that where smiling evilly.

"No." Buffy whispered. Kim started to cry. Angel looked guilty. Xander was to
shocked to react. And Cordelia just stared. Spike reaction was different.

Spike vamped out and ran towards the Master only to be held back by two
vampire. He still tried to get at him but the vamps held him back. "You
bloody bastard!!! I am going to rip your fucken throat out!!! You killed
her!!!"

The Master laughed. "I didn't kill her. I made her immortal. I would think
you would be happy. This way you can be with her forever."

"I didn't want her as a vampire!" Spike yelled still trying to get away form
the vamps holding him back.

The Master looked at him confused. "You actually wanted her as a human.
Weird." He shook his head.

Angel switched into game face and growled recovering from his earlier shock.
And Buffy looked pissed.

The Master walked over to his new vampire and smiled at Spike then turned
back to Willow. He grabbed her by her hair, yanked her head back and kissed
her roughly grabbing her ass with his other hand.

Spike let out a loud growl and pushed the two vampires out of the way causing
the fighting to start. Angel and Buffy started fighting with the vampires
nearest to them while Kim, Xander, Giles, and Cordelia fought them off as a
group. One after another vampires where getting dusted. The anger out of
Willow being turned fueled them making them fight even harder.

"We can't do this!" Buffy yelled. The vampires out numbered them.

No one responded. They where to busy fighting.

Spike saw his Willow out of the corner of his eye. She was just standing
there watching what was before her. The Master stood there smiling. Spike
started to move towards them. Flinging vamps out of his way. When he reached
them the Master was about to push him away when Willow grabbed his arm and
stopped him. The Master eyed her up for a moment then put his arm down.
Willow walked up to him shaking her hips more then she ever did. When she
reached him she smiled.

"I'm not weak anymore am I?" she vamped out. "Does this make you happy? You
can hurt me all you want now. Go ahead try it!" she punched him hard on his
jaw causing his face to go to the side. "I didn't think so. I've had enough
of this. Stop!!!" she screeched. All of the vampires stopped. Her position
made them higher then all of them. She was second to the Master now. Her old
friends stopped when the vampires did. "I have had enough of this. It isn't
any fun." she pouted.

Spike cringed. Dru always pouted.

"My daddy hear said that I should have my first kill. And it should be one of
you. But I don't know...." she trailed off. "Someone here has been a bad boy
and needs to be punished." She bit her lip and smiled childishly and let out
a small growl "Bad boy."

Spike wanted to scream. She may have not been driven crazy. But she acted
like it. He couldn't take another nut. If she did get her soul back would she
be like this? Childish a crazy. Buffy had been right. He didn't like this
Willows. It was her total oppisite in every way.

Willows reached in between her breasts and pulled out a stake. "And I think
it is time he goes bye bye." she said.

Spike couldn't believe it. She wanted to kill him. He thought she would want
to kill her friends. But not him.

Willow held her hand up by her face and twirled the stake. She switched to
game face and frowned. She growled and said "Bad boy."

Spike prepared for the stake. If she was gone enough to want to stake him he
didn't want to live anyway. He watched her. But instead of her moving her
hand forward she pulled it behind her and behind the Master and stabbed him
in his heart from the back. As the dust floated to the floor. She switched
back to her human face and looked at the floor and smiled. "Bye bye daddy."
She looked back up still smiling. "He was in my way." She turned to the other
vampires who where now under her control. "Kill them." she ordered and turned
to Spike. "Now me and you can be together." she smiled at Spike and stood
there.

"Come here baby." Spike said and reached out with his hand. She smiled
giddily and ran to him and jumped up into his arms wrapping her legs around
his waist.

"My Spike."

"Yes, yours. Under one condition."

She pulled back and let herself down and looked at him confused. "What?" she
pouted.

"You get your soul back."

She vamped out and growled at him. He was quick to react. He turned her
around and wrapped his arm around her throat and choked her till she passed
out. "I'm sorry Willow." he pulled some rope out of his pocket which he had
brought just for this purpose and tide her hands and feet together. He laid
her down in the corner and joined the fight.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spike carried Willow into the library. She hadn't woken up yet which was
good. But he had noticed she had started to stir. The others followed in in a
somber mood. No one said anything. Most of the vamps had been disposed of.
Others had run off. Surprisingly no one really got hurt except for a few
scratches and bruises. After they had finished the fight they had hurried
back to the library to lock Willow up while Buffy and Giles went to his house
to get the spell and the orb and Angel went to his apartment to get blood.

Spike walked over to the cage and stepped into it with her. He cut off the
ropes and laid her down gently. He stepped out of the cage and locked it.
Then sat down with the others to wait.

"Hey. Did she wake up yet?" Angel asked walking in the door caring a bag.

"No. But she is starting to move around more. I wish they would hurry."
Xander said.

"Is that the blood?" Spike asked pointing to the bag.

Angel nodded.

Kim had been watching Willow carefully. What had happened to her friend? It
was all so new to her. From what she understood now Willow would never age,
never die unless a stake went through her heart or she was burned to death,
and she would never be able to be out in the sun again. The Willow she saw
wasn't the one she remembered. She didn't even think about the one that was
there a few days ago. She was thinking about the one from college. Before Kim
had found out Willows secrets. She remembered the fun they had. Just like
normal people. That's what Willow had wanted. She add told her that herself.
What would Kim do once this was over? She got up and walked over to the cage
a kneeled down and stared at her friend. When she reached Willow she started
to hear a sniffing sound and then Willows vamped out. She saw Willows eyes
open slightly and a soft growl. Kim fell back on her but and crawled
backwards and stood up. "Um she's awake."

Everyone stood up and watched as Willows stood up and glared at them. She
grabbed a hold of the cage and started pulling on it trying to yank it out
the ground. When she realized that it wasn't going anywhere she stopped and
started pacing back and forth like a caged animal staring at all of them
wishing them dead.

Spike watched her. She wasn't weak anymore. She was mean a deadly. He didn't
think all of her wisdom and powers could be turned into something so deadly
and worse then any fledging. She was smarter then the normal fledging which
gave her a great advantage.

She stopped in front of the door of the cage and let out a loud angry growl
and started kicking the cage and punching it. After she had enough of this
futile attempt she stopped. She stood still and stared at all of them. She
went back to her human form and smiled.

Spike hated this. He couldn't have lived with this Willow. She was deceitful.
After seeing her act of anger and her switch to control so soon he knew she
was going to try to deceive all of them.

"So? Where is Giles?" she asked sweetly as if she was making an everyday
conversation.

Spike was the first to speak up. "Where do you think?"

"Hmmmmm. And to imagine. I am the one responsible for giving my self back a
soul." she turned away from Spike and moved over to the side of the gave and
leaned against it facing Angel who was at the side of the group watching her.

"Well, Angel tell me how it is going to feel. The guiltiness, the weakness.
You may be a powerful vampire but you feel weak don't you? That's what you
are. Weak." she turned and face Spike. Anger showed on her face. "Spike hates
weakness."

Spike was starting to think he took it to far with this weakness thing. She
obviously had taken it to heart.

Willow faced Angel again replacing the smile. "You know Angel after I get my
soul back maybe me and you should get together and be pitiful together. You
think? I mean after all I will be weak again. So I may need you to protect
me. But maybe not. Maybe Spike won't even want me weak." She turned back at
Spike and glared.

She was doing her best to hurt him. She was angry with him for him wanting to
give her back her soul. She didn't think he would let it happen. She was
angry and could hardly hide it. "If I ever get rid of this stupid curse I
will make every one of your lives miserable! I will tear you limb from limb
and then rip your throats out and it eat them for breakfast! And you!"
Willows screamed and pointed at Spike. "I hate you! When this is all over you
just remember that. You have ruined my life! Well, I mean except the part
about being vamped. I gotta thank you for that. But now I get my soul back!
Not even enough time to make my first kill. Now I can't make my soul
miserable! I would have just rathered be human then have to live with a
cursed soul. Say something! You wanted me strong! Well, hear I am. But when
it comes down to it you have to be the strong one. You are scared of me
aren't you?" she said and smiled. "You know what I can do and you are scared
of it. You are weak not me!"

Spike had enough of this. He didn't have a soul and his demon wasn't happy.
It didn't like being called weak. He vamped out and stalked up to her cage.
"Shut up." he growled warningly.

"What are you going to do hurt me? Punch me? Kick me? Go ahead." she said and
stepped away from the door.

Spike stopped. That's what she wanted. Someone to open the door. He went back
to his human face and backed up.

Willows game face slid on and she screamed. Although it was more like a
piercing screech. She started kicking and punching at the cage again. "Let me
out!!!" She went on like this for the next couple of minutes until she wore
herself out. Then she stopped and stared at them. "You know when I get rid of
this soul I am going to have to get someone new. Cause chances are I'll go
crawling back to you when I get the damn soul back. Hmmmmmm maybe I'll turn
Xander. I mean hey when the other evil me was here she seemed to prefer you
Xand. From what I could tell you where fun. But who knows how long it will
take to get rid of the soul and unfortunately you will get old." she pouted.

Xander scooted away. He didn't like the idea. Although he was proud to know
he was a bad vamp he didn't really want to experience it for himself.

Spike realized something. She wasn't crazy or childish. It was all a game. Hr
way of controlling people and fooling them. The worst kind of vampire was a
deceitful one. One that would stake her own sire. Hell he had wanted to get
rid of Angelus but Spike was older then most. But Willow was a new vampire.
And new vampires where usually very loyal to there sires.

"But...." Willow smirked and turned back to Angel. "There is you. And you
where fun without a soul. All the murder. The screaming. The terror."

Angel didn't like the way she was eyeing him up. She was making him nervous.

"Forget one moment of pleasure. I'm sure there is a way of removing the
soul."

Angel was alarmed. Could she do that? Yea she could. She was Willow. She may
be a vampire but she was still smart. She could take away his soul. And that
wasn't good. And if she did all hell would break loose.

Spike growled. He didn't like her wanting Angel.

Willow looked back at Spike. "Angry? Good."

Spike was more then angry he was furious. She kept on trying to provoke him.
And he knew it. But he kept letting her do it. But before she could attempt
anymore two people walked in the doors.

"No!" Willow screamed at seeing Giles with the orb and a printed out copy of
the spell. Giles and Buffy both jumped at the sound of the screaming vampire
kicking at the cage which had already been bent by her earlier attempts.

"I'm guessing she woke up." Buffy said.

"Yea you could say that. And she has been causing problems ever since."
Xander said still a little uneasy by Willows suggestion.

"Come on lets get to it." Giles said.

Willow knew there was no way out of it. "When I lost my soul I am going to
kill you Giles! I am going to kill all of you! You assholes! You are going to
regret this! And if you are dead when I lost my soul I'll kill your children
or your children's children. But somehow you will suffer!"

Giles did his best to ignore her. "It takes three people to do this. Who did
it last time?"

"Me, Willow, and Oz." Cordelia spoke up.

"Well, I think Willow is out and we don't have time to call Oz." Buffy said.
"So who will it be?"

"Me, Cordelia, and Angel." Giles said.

"What?!?! Why him?" Spike yelled. For some reason it angered him that Angel
was going to help give Willow bak her soul and he wasn't.

"Angel is familiar with it and Cordelia was there last time and I am the one
that is supposed to do it."

Spike didn't respond.

"All right lets do it." Giles said. He sat on the floor with Cordelia and
Angel. He placed the orb in the middle. He started chanting and Angel said
some words. Cordelia was just there because they needed a third and she knew
how it was supposed to happen. The orb glowed.

Willow felt it. She was feeling things she didn't want to feel. She fell to
the ground and screamed.

Giles was taken over by some other force just as Willow had been.

Everyone was surprised and worried.

"Don't worry. This is what happened last time." Cornelia said. "Talk about
déjà vu."

Buffy ran over to Willow and fell to the floor and watched her waiting. She
had been the only when there for his part. "Oh god please. I don't think I
could stake her." Willow laid on the ground in a ball staring at them and
growling like an animal.

Spike hurried over to the Slayer and kneeled down next to her.

He looked back at the other three. The orb got brighter then it disappeared.
He turned back to Willow to see a flash of light in her eyes and her switch
back to her human face. she looked back at them.

"Willow?" Spike asked.

Willow heard her name come out of Spikes mouth but she didn't respond. She
looked around confused. Everyone was staring at her."Wh-what happened? And
why am I locked in a cage in these clothes?" She stood up and looked at
everyone.

"Willow what do you remember?" Buffy asked carefully not wanting to let her
out of the cage yet.

"Well, being taken to the master. But everything is a little blurry after
that. So explain to me again why I am dressed like this. It is a little
tight."

Angel was the first to speak up. He knew what was going to happen and she had
to find out on her own. "We don't know. We found you dressed like this."

"Um okay. If you say so." she still wasn't sure what was going on. But Buffy
was opening the cage and she didn't care. She noticed Spike again. She had to
tell him. He obviously helped saved her.

"Sp-Spike?" she stuttered.

"Yes, love?" he asked lowly. How could she not realize she was a vampire?

"I lied to you. I don't like Angel." she spit out.

"I know." he said and cupped her face and rubbed her cheek with his thumb.
"Angel told me. It's okay."

She smiled. He pulled her into his arms and held her waiting for the
inevitable. She pulled away.

"Good. I-" she stopped and stared ahead images flashing before her eyes and
emotions going through her body. Lust, anger, hunger, evilness. Everything
hit are at once. She didn't have to ask anymore questions. She knew what
happened.

Spike watched as the tears fell from her face and everything pure in right in
her was lost forever to the demon that lived inside of her.

She dropped to the floor sobbing hysterically. Buffy moved towards her but
Spike put his arm out and stopped her. He kneeled down on the floor and
picked up the sobbing Willow. He picked her up and cradled her to his chest.
"It's okay baby."

"No, it's not okay! I am a vampire Spike!" she sobbed.

"Willow...." Buffy said and kneeled down by Willow.

Willows looked at her then vamped out. "No!" she cried and pushed herself
against Spike hoping he would protect her. "Get away."

Buffy didn't understand but backed up.

"Angel get the bag." Spike ordered.

Angel hurried over and pulled a pack out and brought it over to Spike.

Spike took the bag from Angel and held it up to Willow.

"No! I won't! I can't!"

"Willow do it! You need it!" he yelled at her.

She shook her head and refused to drink it.

"Bloody hell." he threw the bag to the side and brought his wrist up to his
mouth a cut it with his teeth. He put his wrist on her lips. "Drink."

She couldn't resist. She pierced his wrist and drank from it greedily.

When Spike felt she had taken enough he pulled his wrist away. She growled
slightly instinct taking over. Then just sat there. She went back to human
face and cried.

"Now what?" Xander asked.

"I don't know." Giles responded.

Willow started thinking. Of everything. Being captured. Turned. She hated the
master with every fiber in her body. At least she had killed him. But she
couldn't go on like this. She wanted to die. She looked around. A stake. As
easy as it would be she couldn't push it through her heart. Then she spotted
it. It would hurt but she would be able to go through with it. She pushed
herself away from Spike slowly as not to alarm anyone. Then leaped for a
table and grabbed the bottle and ran to the other side of the room.

"Willow what the hell are you doing?" Spike yelled.

"What does it look like Spike? I'm sorry. But I can't go through with this."

Spike went to lunge for her but Angel held him back. "No. She will do it. And
if you move and try to take her down she will do it without thinking. Just
wait."

Angel walked in front of Spike "Willow please don't." Angel said. He knew how
she was feeling but didn't know how to express it into words.

"I have to. I can't stand this any longer. And I have only been back for a
few minutes. I lost everything in one moment."

"Willow you didn't lost anything. We are all still here and not going
anywhere."

"Yes, you will! Buffy, Xander, Kim, and Giles will all die. They will grow
old while I stay the same! I can't watch that!" she uncorked the bottle and
held it close to her mouth.

"But me and Spike aren't going anywhere. We will be here for you." he said
soothingly.

"It isn't enough." she cried. "I just want things back to the way they where.
Before everything. This is what these past eight years have led up to! This!"
she gestured to herself. "Well, if this is how it is going to be I am going
to change it now." she brought the bottle up to her lips to drink.

"No!" Spike yelled and ran over to Willow knocking the bottle out of her
hand. She screamed. But it was a scream of pain. She cried loudly and he held
her to him. "I am not going to lose anyone else." As he held her she let our
a blood curdling scream and vamped out then went limp. Spike held her way
from him. He saw burn marks all along her arms and some on the side of her
face. "Oh god baby I'm sorry." He picked her up and started walking towards
the door.

"What do you think you are doing?" Buffy said and lunged towards him but
Angel held her back.

"No. She needs to be away from us. Us being here just reminds her of her
past." Angel said.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spike laid Willow down on his bed. He was going to keep her hear until she
healed and recovered form the shock. But he wasn't going to let her runaway
from all this. He sat down in a chair and watched her. He couldn't hear her
blood and he couldn't smell it. It was unnerving. But he could smell the
demon, the evilness radiating off of her even if she did have a soul. The
demon still lied inside of her. But his demon was ecstatic. Shouldn't he
then? He couldn't be happy that she was a vampire. He like her as a human.
But some part of him was happy. Happy that he wouldn't lose her if she could
make it through this. He saw her stir and he rushed over to the side of her
bed. He smoothed the hair away from her face. The burns where already healing.

"Hey baby."

"Spike? Oh god I'm sorry. I don't know how to control myself."

"It's okay Willow. It'll get better. I promise." he said soothingly and wiped
the bloody tears from her face.

"No. No, it won't. Angel has had a soul for a long time. Do you see him
scampering around like a giddy school child?" she sobbed.

Spike laughed at the picture. "No, you don't. But think of all the things
Angelus has done. Willow you have nothing to be ashamed of. You didn't hurt
anyone."

"But I don't want to live like this. It would be so easier to kill myself."

"Don't do it. If you do I will be following you."

"But Spike you don't have a soul you don't have a reason to feel bad."

"I lost Dru. But then I found you. And everything was right again pet. But I
can't lose anyone else. So please, for me, don't do it."

"Just don't leave me Spike."

He sat on the bed and gathered her in his arms. "I'm not going to leave you
baby. Never. You are stuck with me forever."

"Forever is going to be a long time now." she said trying to joke. She got as
close to Spike as she could. He made her feel safe. Like everything was going
to be okay.

"Good."

Willow pulled herself out of Spikes arms and sat up. The clock read 5:00 PM.
She still had a while till sun set. She stood up and walked out of the room
to the kitchen. She glared at the refrigerator. She hated this part. She
walked over to it and flung open the door. She didn't like doing it in front
of Spike either. He knew it to. And he learned to respect it. She grabbed a
random bag of blood and sat down at the kitchen counter and hung her head.
Even though no one was there looking at her she still felt embarrassed. Thank
god she couldn't see herself when she did this. But it would be nice to have
a reflection. It was amazing how you could start forgetting stuff about
yourself after not looking in the mirror everyday. It wasn't major stuff.
Thank god for pictures. She vamped out and sunk her teeth into the bag. After
emptying it she flung it into the trash and made her way to the living room.

She had some of her stuff already. She even had a computer. But not because
she liked it. Because it helped her take her mind off of her current problem.
And her problems weren't going to get better. She still hadn't faced her
friends. Spike had talked to them everyday though. And everyday he told her
she would have to face them. She knew it. She was starting to miss them
anyway. Spike had also told her she needed to talk to Angel. Spike hated the
fact that now she had to converse with Angel. But it was because he could
help her.

But Spike was helping her to even if he didn't understand her situation like
Angel did. He would sit there and hold her while she cried. That's how they
started sleeping in the same bed together. The only time she felt better was
when he was near her. So one night she woke up crying and went to his room.
He had taken her in his arms silently and just held her and they had both
fallen asleep like that. Since that night she had slept with him. Who would
have ever thought sleeping with Spike would be so comforting.

They had discussed a little about there relationship. He wasn't going to
leave her and she wanted to be with him. But she had told him she needed to
get away for a while and of course he was coming with her. But he had made
her promise to face her friends first. She was scared but knew it would be
for the best. She couldn't leave unfinished stuff behind. She needed to face
her problems. They would just haunt her in the future.

"Hey pet what are you doing up?" Spike asked and walked over and sat next to
her on the couch.

"Eating."

He nodded.

"Spike I want to go see them tonight." she said out of no where. She didn't
know when she had decided.

"You sure?" he asked her.

She nodded. "Yea. I think I am ready. It is still hard but not as bad as it
was before. Like you said I was lucky. I hadn't killed anyone yet. I think
the thing bothering me is outliving my friends. And the sun. I miss the sun.
I also miss my reflection. I never knew how much I could hate a mirror or a
piece of glass."

"Well, it never bothered me." Spike admitted thankfully.

"Yea well you don't have a soul." she turned and looked at him. "How can you
be nice and not have a soul?"

Spike cringed at the word 'nice'.

"Oops." she said and smiled. Something she did rarely lately. "Sorry Spike.
You are an evil, crazy, psychotic, cold hearted vampire."

"Thanks. But the damage has been done. As to your question ducks I am old. I
don't feel the need to go around acting like a psychopath. At least not all
the time. And anyway you don't see me eating out of baggys. Well, not all the
time." he pointed out.

"Don't tell me that. I prefer to forgot about that. But you do it sometimes."

"Yea and only because you make me."

"Okay well back to the earlier conversation. You say cause of age. But
Angelus is older then you. And he wasn't very nice."

"Yea well he is extra special crazy, red."

"Ah." she said and laid her head on his chest.

"You sure you are ready to do this tonight?"

"I'm sure Spike stop worrying. Seriously. I think I am getting better." she
said trying to convince him.

He sat there for a moment and remembered something. "Willow there was
something I wanted to ask you."

Willow pulled her head back up and looked at him. Rarely did he use her name.
He usually called her pet, ducks, or red. "What?"

"Well, I didn't want to ask before cause it might bring up bad memories but
if you do mean you are feeling better I got to ask. Cause it was so out of
the ordinary."

"Ask already then." she said growing impatient.

"Why the hell did you stake your sire?"

Willow was surprised. She understood now the whole sire thing. You where
supposed to show them respect and serve them. Willow laughed.

Spike stared at her. What the hell was she laughing about. He thought it
would make her depressed.

Willow remembered how she felt when she decided to kill him. That's why she
laughed. "Well, to put it simply enough Spike my boy. He was in my way. I had
to get rid of him."

Spike looked surprised. That wasn't how it was supposed to work.

"Spike with no soul I would have been deceitful and do anything just to have
power." she explained and laid her head back on his chest.

"All right now that that is out of the way there is something else. Actually
rules."

Again Willow lifted her head away. She was going to start getting whiplash.
"Rules?"

"Yea. Vampire with a soul rules."

Willow laughed a little. She loved to laugh. It felt so good to do it. She
didn't know what happened. For some reason she felt good. "Okay so what are
they?"

"All right, no lurking, no acting depressed, no cryptic guy or actually
cryptic girl routine as you call it. So pretty much don't act like Angel."

Willow laughed. A whole hearted laugh. "All right. I promise."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy, Xander, Cordelia, Giles, Kim, and Angel waited as patiently as they
could for Willow and Spikes arrival. Spike had left as soon as the sun went
down to tell them that what Willow had decided. He had a talk with them then
went back to get her.

"She isn't going to like suck out blood our something?" Cordelia broke the
silence. Everyone turned to stare at her indcrediously. "What?"

"You don't see Angel biting us everytime he is around us do you?" Xander
asked her a little irritated by her question. Willow was after while is best
friend.

"No but he has had practice. You saw her go all crazy when Buffy got by her."

"Cordy. Shut up." Buffy said.

"Sorry." she said a little coldly.

They sat silent for a few more moment.

"God I can't take this anymore!" Buffy said a got up. "I have no idea what to
expect. I know she wont suck out blood." she said specifically for Cordelia
and glared at her and Cordelia returned her glare. "But how will she act? She
won't be the same I know but jeez." she said and sat back down.

"I hope she isn't all sulky like a person that will be left unnamed." Xander
said.

Angel turned to him and glared. Xander smirked. Angel turned back the other
way. "We are soon going to find out. Someone is here." he said.

After a moment two people walked in. One person they didn't pay much
attention to. But the other they had all there eyes on her. She looked the
same except for the fact that she was very pale.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As soon as Willow walked in everything felt odd. Like it was all familiar but
something had changed. She herself felt like she could just walk in and make
conversation but felt like something was different and she shouldn't. They
where waiting for her. Why? Oh well. "Hey guys."

Xander walked away form Cordelia and walked up to Willow. "Hey Wills." he
said unsurely and smiled a small smile

Willow knew he wanted to say more. Could she really be his friends? The
friend she had been before? Before she left for college? She looked at his
face and new she could be. She smiled a little unsurley herself. "Hey." she
whispered and wrapped her arms around his neck and he wrapped his arms around
her back and hugged her tightly.

Willow closed her eyes and smiled. It felt good to be hugged by him. But deep
down she was sad. He felt so warm and she was so cold. They both pulled away.
Before she knew it she was bombarded with hugs. Not fast ones. But slow ones.
Warm ones. She had been so scared coming. But now she realized she should
have come sooner and it would have been stupid not to come.

After a few minutes of crying and hugging they finally started to settle
down. Nobody really knew how do start a conversation.

Spike decided he would be the one the silence. "Well, are we here to talk or
sit here and just bloody stare?"

Willow turned and glared at him for his unsubtle hint. He shrugged.

"I-I don't know what to say." Buffy said truthfully. "I mean what would be
wrong and what would be right."

"It's okay Buffy. I won't break. I think we need to get EVERYTHING out in the
open."

"Right. Well....."Buffy said.

"Okay I well start. Me and Spike are going to go away for a while. Nothing
permanent. But I just need to get away. Like some soul searching stuff. You
know?" Willows said

"No soul here." Spike said and raised his hand.

Buffy glared at him. His and Cordelias choices in words weren't that great.
"I don't know Spike. It is becoming a trend lately. Maybe we should get you
one." she said spitefully.

"Over my un-dead body." he shot back

"That could be arranged." she spat out.

As much as Willow knew she should stop the arguing she kind of liked it. But
Giles was quick to put an end to it.

"Excuse me. We have better things to talk about here. Willow where do you
plan on going?"

"I have no clue. Haven't even gotten that far yet."

"Are you sure you are coming back?" Xander asked getting serious.

She turned and looked at her friend. God she wanted to cry. She wanted to
grow old with him and Buffy. Not watch them. How would she do this in about
30 years? "Yes, I have to. I can't just push this all away and try to forget
about it. I am scared about like in 50 years. Things won't be the same. And
then one day you will all be gone. I could deal with living forever but the
fact that one day I will loose all of yall is really hard to deal with."

"Willow we don't care. We are still going to be there for you." Buffy said
soothingly.

"I know. But it's still hard."

Buffy gave her a small smile but didn't say anything.

"How long do you think you will be gone?" Giles asked trying to break the
silence that seemed to be taking over very often.

"Who knows. If you need us back for help then I will be back. But if not. It
could be a year or two years if it takes that long. I don't know. I just need
to start over." Willow said. She looked towards the back of the room at her
friend. She was silent. Probably not really knowing what was going on and not
being able to understand it. Willow got up from her chair and walked over to
Kim. "Say something. Please."

"I-I don't know what to say." she said softly.

"Are you scared of me?" Willow asked worriedly.

"No. I just don't know what to think. I am not like your friends. They
understand this better then me. Just a few weeks ago a learned about
vampires. And now my best friend is one. I just don't think I have let it all
set in yet. Or maybe I just really don't understand it. I feel that something
should be different. But at the same time nothing seems different."

Willow smiled. "I know how you feel." She hugged Kim. She had made her
decision.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spike and Willow walked back to his place in silence for about half way there
before she broke it.

"Spike I know where I want to go."

"Where?" he asked. She didn't know about 30 minutes ago but now she did? When
did this happen.

"New York."

Spike was surprised. "Why there?"

She sighed. "I don't know. After talking with Kim I realized the reason I was
leaving was mostly because of Buffy and Xander and the others. They
understand what I am now. And you would think that would make me want to
stay. But Kim doesn't. She doesn't see the difference. And neither do I. I
know there is one but I just don't see it now. And I liked New York. And hey
we can fight other masters that want to take over the world while we are at
it. But at the same time I have a friend there. And it all works out
perfectly. New York was where I could be different. No one knew about me and
my past life. And now that I am different it is even better." she said and
looked at him hoping he would want to go to.

"All right then. New York it is." Spike said and wrapped his arm around her
waste pulling her close.

The End