FUNNY MONEY
 

The Greenbrier…
 
 

Sunday afternoon
 

“Wow,” Amanda commented as Lee drove their car onto the spacious grounds of the elegant Greenbrier resort.  The snow from the night before rested peacefully on the 6000 acres of property that surrounded the grand hotel.  The hotel’s huge marble columns were soon visible with many lights on inside and out.  “This place is more beautiful than I remember.  The snow really makes the hotel look like a palace.”

“Yeah, it certainly is striking,” Lee concurred.  “We should have come up here to celebrate our anniversary.”

“With Philip in college, we can’t afford this place.  Not unless the government has another seminar...”

“I’ll see what I can arrange!” he teased.

“If I remember correctly from when I was a kid, the new building was constructed around the back, towards the west side of the property.”

Lee nodded his agreement.  “Yeah, the meeting we had was in the ‘West Wing’.  Now we just have to find the entrance to the damned bomb shelter.”

They followed the signs to the ‘West Wing’, and parked the car.  Since it was late in the afternoon, and the sun was beginning to set, there were few people outside in the cold snow.  Lee and Amanda investigated the grounds undisturbed.

“Amanda, this way!” Lee suggested as they walked to what appeared to be a delivery entrance.

“Are you sure you want to do this?” Amanda asked skeptically as Lee charged ahead.

“Yes, now come on.  It makes logical sense that the entrance would be hidden in plain sight.”

A few minutes later, they’d found the entrance.  The thunderous bang of the huge blast door closed behind them, which made Amanda jump.  She turned around and stared at the large steel gate for a few seconds before moving away from it.   Like it or not, they were inside the bunker.

“Oh my gosh!” she groaned uneasily.

The underground hallway in front of them had to be at least 400 feet long.  Lights dotted the ceiling every twenty feet or so, casting ghostly shadows along the supply pipes that ran against the cement walls.   Tentatively, they went forward, wincing at the eerie echo their footsteps created as they advanced down what seemed to be a never-ending hallway.

Lee glanced over at his wife who was extremely edgy.  “Relax, will you.  It’s not a haunted house, it’s a bomb shelter.”

“An atomic bomb shelter,” she whispered anxiously as they made their way down the creepy corridor.  “This place is cavernous!”

Lee nodded.  “Yeah, I wish I had blueprints.”

“They probably don’t exist anymore, if they ever did.  What exactly are we looking for, and don’t tell me I’ll know it when I see it?” she warned, still glancing around nervously and appearing very ill at ease.

“I’m not sure.  It might be better if we split up,” he suggested, realizing the enormity of the emergency shelter.

“Split up?!” she gulped apprehensively.  “Down here?”

“Relax, Amanda, it’s just you and me down here.  It’s late, not to mention a holiday weekend, nobody else is going to be snooping around.  For the most part, nobody acknowledges this place even exists!” he reminded her in a reassuring voice.

“Great!” she mumbled unenthusiastically.  “They could shoot us and nobody would ever find our bodies.”

Lee gave her a reproving glare.  “We can cover more ground it we each inspect different rooms and be out of here that much sooner.”

“All right,” she conceded with a nod.  “I’m for that!”

Stopping at a doorway, Lee opened it up and looked down at what appeared to be a two-story room, filled with generators, pumps, and other gear.  Although currently silent, he realized what it was.  “The power plant, no doubt,” Lee commented as he closed the door.

Together, they continued down the hallway a short way before reaching another door.  Inside was what appeared to be a communications room of sorts with telephone equipment, television monitors, and other recording equipment.

“WOW!  That looks familiar,” Amanda nodded, glancing inside the room at the large mural of the Capitol’s Dome.  “The briefing room, perhaps?”

“Yeah, that would be my guess.  There’s enough electronic equipment here for a press conference.  Feel better?” he asked, noting that she seemed less anxious.

“A little,” she smiled, “I’m letting my imagination run wild.  I’ll search this room, see what I can find.”

“You’ve got the key from the dollhouse?”

“Sure do.”

“What was the number on the house again?” he questioned.

“3-9-4,” she called out.

“Keep an eye out for anything with those numbers on it.  I’m going to search across the hall in the power plant.  I’ll meet you in the hallway in an hour, OK?” he suggested, glancing at his watch.

Looking at the dial on her watch, she nodded her agreement and added a warning.  “Don’t leave without me!”

“Never,” he replied, kissing her lips tenderly before ducking into the other room.
 

 ***
 

Amanda explored the ‘Briefing Room’, her hands sweeping over the telecommunications equipment.  “Not even dusty,” she commented realizing Congress could easily broadcast to the nation with state of the art technology.  However, if her father had left something in the room, it would have been discarded years ago knowing telephone and television technology had improved significantly since his death in 1969.  Never-the- less, she inspected every nook and cranny for anything that might be a clue.  Finding none, she walked back into the hall.

Glancing down the silent hallway, she still felt an odd sense that she was being watched. Despite some reservations, she continued down the hall and tried the next door she came to.  Opening up the door, she found a small lounge. The furniture, although a bit outdated, was in good condition.  In the magazine rack were a variety of magazines, she picked one up.

“Wow!” she remarked out loud with surprise.  “I just read this issue on the airplane the other day.”

Continuing her inspection, she noticed the exercise bike facing the television.  She stared at it for a few moments and wondered.  “What would you watch on television if there was a nuclear holocaust?  Would there be anyone left to report the news?”

Resuming her investigation, she observed a door in the room.  Going over, she wasn’t sure what she’d find or where it led, but she knew she’d have to investigate.  After opening the door, she flicked on the light switch; the fluorescent lights hummed and blinked, cascading on in sequence.  Standing inside the room, she realized it was meant to be a dormitory.  Far from fancy, there were plain metal bunk beds lining each side of the room.  Each bed had a shelf attached under it, which could be locked as well as a wall locker nearby.

A smile grew across her face.  Amanda pulled out the key that her father had given her for the dollhouse.  Rushing to the first bed, she tried the key in the lock, but it wouldn’t work it.  She pulled opened the drawer and inside was a key similar to the one she held in her hand.  With her heart now pounding, she tried the key in the locker’s keyhole, but again, it wasn’t a match.  She repeated this on the lower bunk, another locker again and again until she was on the far side of the room.  Although the key was similar, it failed to match any of the drawers or lockers.

“There has to be a locked drawer somewhere in this facility!” she declared authoritatively.  Sighing heavily from frustration and disappointment, she sat down on the lower bunk’s bare mattress.  Part of her wanted to cry; part of her wanted to scream.  With every passing hour, she had to come to terms with the fact that her father had a secret life that she knew nothing about.  Now she knew how her mother felt when they came clean about working for the Agency.  Swallowing hard, her heart started to pound.  In a whisper, she asked aloud, “Did mother know?”

She didn’t expect an answer, of course, but what happened next was also unexpected.  The lights in the room went out.  At first, she blinked, expecting the lights to come back on.  She sat motionless for a few minutes, but they didn’t return.

“Was there a power failure?  Wouldn’t the emergency generators kick in?” she speculated and then continuing her line of thought, she asked another question, knowing her husband was checking out the power plant.  “What did you do, Lee?”

Feeling claustrophobic in the darkness, she stood up suddenly, needing to escape to safety.  In the process, she banged her head on the top bunk.

“Ouch!” she cried out, falling back down on the lower bed, and rubbing the bump that was forming on her head.  Taking a few deep breaths, she waited for the pain to subside.  She attempted to recall how many beds there had been in the room.  However, she couldn’t remember for sure.

“Think, Amanda, think,” she encouraged herself, knowing they were deep in the basement of a bomb shelter.  There was no natural light, and it was dark outside at this hour anyway.  There were no nightlights and no emergency lights currently working.  Nobody was supposed to be down here.  Feeling for the side of the metal bed, she tried to get her wits about her.  It had to be Lee playing a prank.

“Lee?” she called out tentatively, but there was no answer.  Again, she called out, this time anger was clear in her voice, “Lee, put the lights back on; the jokes over, and yes you scared me.”

Slowly she rose from the bed, now cautious of the upper bunk.  Standing now, she listened for his laughter, or his footsteps.  Hearing a squeak, she thought it was the door closing.  Wishing she’d brought a flashlight with her, she cursed herself for being unprepared.  “Lee, turn the lights on right now!  It’s not very funny.”

Nothing - no answer, no lights, just complete darkness.  She stood in the pitch-black room with her heart pounding and her ears ringing from the sheer silence.  Using her hands, she felt the edge of the bed, slowly and warily, she made her way to the next bunk.  Taking a few hesitant baby steps forwards, her hands sought out the next bed playing a real life game of ‘blind man’s bluff’.

She continued to move back towards the door and the light switch.  Things went well at first; however, in her eagerness to escape the darkness, she stumbled.  Unable to see, she crashed into the nearest bunk bed and fell loudly onto the floor.

“Damn it, that hurt!” she cried out in pain, rubbing her throbbing elbow, totally exasperated at her predicament.

Suddenly, the door squeaked opened again and the lights came on in succession as they had when she entered the dorm.

“Amanda?” his familiar voice called out.

“Lee Stetson, I’m going to strangle you with my bare hands!” she called out furiously, peeking past the metal bunk, as she sat on the floor rubbing her wound.

“Are you all right?” he asked, rushing towards her.

“Maybe you should have thought about that before you turned off the lights on me!” she snapped.

“Amanda, I turned on the lights when I heard a crash in here.”

“Yeah, right,” she grumbled, not believing him.  “That crash was me tripping into the bed.”

“I swear to you, sweetheart, I turned the lights on, not off.  I wouldn’t do that to you.  Are you sure you didn’t accidentally hit a switch?”

She shook her head.  “I was sitting on a bed when the lights went out, Lee.  I was nowhere near a switch.  I thought I heard the door squeak close.  You really didn’t turn off the lights?”

“No, I didn’t,” he answered earnestly, glancing around the room guardedly.

“Somebody else is down here then.”

“We better get out of here,” he suggested.

“No, wait!  The key – It fits the drawers.”

“What drawer?” he pressed.

“I’ll show you.”

Lee helped her up off the floor, and she went over to the nearest bunk bed.  She pulled open the unlocked drawer and pointed to its contents.

“This is the key my dad gave me for the dollhouse,” she explained, holding out the palm of her hand.  Then reaching for the key that was inside the drawer, she held them up.  “They’re almost identical.  I’ve tried this key in every lock in the room.  They don’t fit.”

“But there must be another dormitory somewhere down here with a locked drawer!” Lee finished her thought for her.  “That’s a lot of bed checks.”

“The sooner we start checking, the quicker we can be out of here,” she reminded him.

“Let’s go,” Lee agreed.

“Stay close to me this time, huh?  I was scared to death when the lights went out.”

“Yeah, I’m not thrilled about being down here in the dark either,” he admitted as they walked out of the dorm, through the lounge and into the hallway.

“What else is across the hall?” Amanda asked.

“The power plant takes up most of that side of the hallway.  I also found the kitchen and dining room.  It’s through that door.  Plenty of ‘C-Rations’ in the storage area, but they also had a freezer and a food prep area for real food.  They’re well stocked and prepared to be down here a long while.”

“Let’s hope they never have to use this place for real,” she remarked, coming to the next door on the right.  “Have you been in here?”

“Not yet.  Shall we?” he asked, opening the door for her.

Inside the next room apparently was a medical facility.  “Wow, I’m impressed.”

Lee nodded as the two of them inspected the room.  “I’ll say; they’ve got a pharmacy, x-ray equipment…”

Amanda tapped him on the back.  “Don’t forget the operating room over there.  I wonder how often this place is updated?”

“Probably annually,” Lee surmised.  “Let’s get out of here and find another dorm.  Our key isn’t going to fit into anything here.”

“Right,” she agreed and they went back into the hallway.

Another large meeting room was at the end of the corridor, spacious enough for Congress to convene.  Another door led to a set of stairs.  They took the stairs to the lower level and went down the hallway.  The first door they opened was another dormitory.

“How many beds were there in the dorm upstairs?” Lee questioned.

“I never really counted them.  About fifty, maybe more…”

“Were the beds numbered?”

“The bed had nameplates with either a senator or congressman’s name on it.  I don’t think they were numbered,” she answered.

“Let’s get busy then,” he replied.  “If there are enough beds for all of Congress, we’ll be here for a while.”

“Maybe we’ll get lucky?”

“Yeah, right.”

They searched through several more dormitories as quickly as they could with no luck.  None of the drawers or lockers were locked, and the key didn’t fit any of them.

“I’m starting to think we’re on a wild goose chase.  Maybe I was wrong about coming up here,” Lee remarked as they entered yet another dorm.

“No.  The key for the dollhouse is identical to the ones inside the drawers.  We have to check every bed drawer until we find the right one.”

With a raised eyebrow, he nodded, and they continued the search.  They went into yet another dorm and Lee continued to pull open the drawers.  When he bent down to pull on a drawer in the lower bunk, it wouldn’t budge.  He tugged on it again, not sure if it was stuck or locked.  Still it refused to open.

“Amanda!” he called out and instantly she was beside him.  “Try the key in this one.  I think it’s locked.”

With an eager smile, she nodded and slid the key into the lock.  It fit perfectly, and when she turned it, the drawer opened.

Inside the drawer was a small bundle, wrapped carefully in old newspaper.  Lee and Amanda grinned excitedly at each other.  Amanda reached in and took the parcel out, and began to unwrap it, careful of its contents.

“Oh my gosh!” she gasped when she saw what was inside.  “The engraving plates.”

Lee stared at them with wide eyes, shocked that they came across them.  In a whisper of an anxious voice, he commanded.  “Wrap them back up and put it in your bag.”

“Yeah, I’d like to get out of here before we’re plunged back into darkness,” Amanda concurred.

They hurried out of the dormitory; neither of them spoke another word.  They retraced their steps back to the upper level and quickly exited through the enormous blast doors they had entered several hours earlier.  Finally, they were back in Lee’s car driving out of town.  When they got on the interstate highway, Lee Stetson hit the gas pedal.

“Whew!” Amanda let out a long sigh of relief.  “That place gave me the creeps.  I’m glad we got out of there without any problems.”

“Yeah, the place was a bit… eerie,” he remarked, his eye watching his rearview mirror.

Amanda observed her husband gaze.  The tone of his voice was unmistakably one of concern.  Now glancing over her shoulder, she asked, “Is there a problem?”

“Probably just a coincidence,” he answered, trying to reassure his wife.

“We’re being followed,” she replied, hoping she was wrong, but Lee was now doing over 80 mph so she knew the answer.

“Afraid so,” he nodded, as the car behind them struggled to keep up.  “I think we woke up the sleeping giant…”

End Part Five
 

Go to:  Part Six
 
 

Back to:  IFF FILM LIBRARY
 
 

Go to:  Robin's Stories