{70-73}

[I’m sorry, but I don’t have any of the pictures on here. But these are transcribed exactly as they are in the magazine.]

So what if we were caught rummaging through the trash bins behind Central Perk. How else to unearth these never-before seen treasures?

[A yearbook with a picture of Fat Monica.]

[Written in blue ink on stationary.]

From the desk of Phoebe Buffay.

My Freebie List

1. Bob Dylan

2. His HOT son

3. Mulder

4. Bill Gates - Those glasses!

5. William Shatner

6. Mikhail Baryshnikov

We could play Twister!

7. Gandhi

At least I’d get to go to heaven.

[Two pieces of paper with those big blue lines, for, like, first graders. Page one is a drawing of a red house with people in the windows. They’re labeled, “MOMMY, MOMMY, DADDY, ME, MONKY”. The other page is written in pencil. It’s got a gold star at the top.]

My family

by Ben Geller

My family is ful of Mommies. Theres my Mommy Carol and my Mommy Susan but daday says I shold call her “lesbommy,” and then he laffs and then crys a little. There was emily but she wasnt my mommy for long. Dadday sed aunt rchel wold be my mommy but he stopped saying that around the time We went to see daddys lawyer unkl russell. unkl russell sed he hopes daddy gives me even mor mommyies because then he will be able to buy a car.

[Written in red marker on a Central Perk napkin.]

<s>Stinky</s> Smelly cat, <s>stinky</s> smelly cat.

What are they feeding you?

<s>Stinky</s> Smelly! cat, smelly cat.

It’s not your fault.

[drawing of a cat]

[A playbill.]

Joey Tribbiani

(Understudy) is a Queens, N.Y., native who is thrilled to be returning to the New York stage, where he last played Nick in Off Broadway’s Boxing Day. Off Off Off Broadway creits: Freud! The Musical (Sigmund Freud), The Wee Ones’ production of Pinnochio. Film: Outbreak 2: The Virus Takes Manhattan (Dead Body) and opposite Richard Crosby in a still-untitled World War I drama. Tv: Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E (Mac Machiavelli), NBC’s Days of Our Lives (Dr. Drake Remoray). He also appeared briefly as Al Pacino’s butt double, but was dismissed for “bringing too much to the role.” Joey thanks Mon, Rachel, Pheebs, Chandler and Ross for all their support, and says “How you doin’?”

[A planner that starts on June 11 2001. The activities are written in different colors.]

*Organize soup cans by expiration date.

*Clip and file Bobby Flay article under “food hotties.”

*Figure out the week’s outfits based on weather report.

*Ask the gang to stop using bath towels to dry hands; that’s what hand towels are for. Duh!

*Power-wash windows!!! Yay!

*Move cookie stash to location C2.

*Do comparison test between Clorox and Lysol.

*Dust vacuum cleaner.

*Complete weekly inspection of furniture placement (consider moving couch 1/4 inch to the left?)

*Invent new napkin-folding technique!

*Find suitable backup phone pen.

*Disinfect Scrabble tiles!

*File list under “done” when complete.

[Coupons made out of colored construction paper.]

Coupon - No Expiration date

Redeem for One Hour of Joey Love

This coupon good for one game of ::foosball::

Redeemable anytime.

Never expires.

This coupon good for one hour on my La-Z-Boy. Redeemable only during daylight hours and when I’m not home. (Oh yeah, and when Baywatch isn’t on!) Offer good for a limited time only.

[An invitation typed out in a script font.]

On September 22,

one thousand nineteen hundred ninety four,

Dr. and Mrs. Leonard Green

cordially, proudly and ostentatiously invite you

to join them to watch their daughter,

Rachel Karen

- flanked by six still-unmarried bridesmaids -

as she embarks on a new life with

the prosperous Doctor Barry Farber, DDS.

The ceremony will commence at 8:00

at Temple Beth Shalom,

when our Rachel will walk down the aisle

- in Vera Wang -

and join her DDS at the huppa.

A reception - with open bar - at the Long Beach

Yacht Club will follow the ceremony.

The Bride is registered at

Bloomingdale’s

Saks Fifth Avenue

Barneys

Bergdorf Goodman

Williams-Sonoma

Tiffany & Co.

Fortunoff

[the list runs off the page]

[A business card.]

DroneTec Inc.

Chandler Bing

1675 Broadway

New York, NY 10019

Phone 555-1212

Fax 555-1212

Dept of Administration

Text-based division, Accounts M-R (except P)