[1998]

Howie: Thank you for being here!

Jennifer: My pleasure.

H: You're.. you're my first!

J: Wow!

H: Be gentle with me!

J: I think we should have a hug, don't you think, just for that moment!

H: My wife is in the green room--

J: Where?

H: Honey, this is strictly professional!

J: Just for luck! Just for luck!

J: Okay, this is obviously your first show and I am honored to be your first guest because I think you're awesome!

H: Thank you!

J: And um.. isn't he awesome?

H: Did you see me walk up?

J: I did see you walk up! It was brilliant, I don't think anyone's done it better!

H: Thank you!

J: Ehh!

H: What is that?

J: This is just a little treat for you to say Here's to many many many years of wonderful--

H: Thank you! It's a chiffon thing..

J: It's a chiffon..

H: Well should I open it?

J: Yeah open it!

H: Okay, I'll open it, opening it, I'm opening it now...

J: You're opening it!

H: Is it a.. is it an album?

J: Don't shake it don't shake it DON'T SHAKE IT!

H: Okay, okay, is it.. oh wow! Oh wow! Oh my God, I don't know if you can see this.. no this is reeeallly nice! Look at this.. it says "Hey Howie, will you be.. my neurotic friend? Love, Jennifer"

J: Now you have to keep that on your desk!

H: I will! I feel bad..

J: Why?

H: Because I didn't know you were getting me something..

J: You didn't know?!

H: Oh, actually, I did know, and here! [ He handed her the flowers and boxed chocolates Jay Leno had dropped by earlier ]

J: Oh, thank you! Did you hand pick these all yourself?

H: Yeah! And those are chocolates!

J: Oh my Lord!

H: Half eaten..

J: You ate some on the way over?

H: I do, I do! Now, this is new for me, so, do you get nervous doing these things?

J: Uhh.. yeah! Sure!

H: Are you nervous now?

J: I'm actually okay! Now that I'm here.

H: Okay! But you do a lot of talk shows have you ever been in this room before?

J: This is.. this is the..

H: Howard Brown.

J: Right?

H: Yes.

J: It is! This was always the dream.

H: You dreamt of doing Johnny Carson?

J: Well, Carson! I mean, you're a little kid, growing up, and you're watching, mesmerized, and you're just thinking 'Well, maybe someday..' you know..

H: Were you ever on the Johnny Carson show?

J: Nooo! Nooo! I was waitressing when the Johnny Carson show was on!

H: Really?

J: Yeah! Wow, it is kind of like a swooping thing, though!

H: Yes, we're swooping here! Are you a Bob Hope fan?

J: Oh I LOVE Bob Hope! I actually got to meet Bob Hope recently!

H: You met him? I've never met him. What was he like?

J: It was wild. Well... he's.. Bob Hope!

H: Right, therefore..

J: ....um... he's Bob Hope!

H: You know what? With that description, when I close my eyes, I feel like he's right here with us! When you met him, did you talk to him?

J: Well, the only thing we actually did, we were taking a photograph with him, and the cast, and he was sort of, mumbling stuff and then all of a sudden he just blurted out, "FRIEEEENDS! mlah mlah rbfuwbazrj EHHH? FRIEEEENDS!" And that was like what we said!

H: How do you answer that?

J: "Well, that's right!"

H: Well, you had a conversation with Bob!

J: I had a conversation with Bob!

H: Now I understand your family is in show business, your father is of course John Aniston [ clap clap clap clap clap clap clap ]

H: And your mother is a model.

J: Was a model, yes. Actually, an actress and then a model, she couldn't stand the rejection!

H: Of modeling?

J: No, acting.

H: Well I thought there would be more rejection in modeling... did she just walk into a room, turn and leave all the time?

J: What did you just say?

H: I said, did she walk into a room, turn around and leave all the time?

J: Yeah, just pivots, she would just pivot.

H: You know, cuz models walk into a room, show off what they're wearing, and leave!

J: Yeah, that's how she served dinner.

H: Now, I also heard that you have a very famous godfather.

J: Yes, I do, I did! Yeah, Telly, Savalas. All the Greeks.

H: You're Greek?

J: Yup.

H: Who loves ya, baby?

J: Who loves ya, baby!

H: I didn't know you were Greek, Aniston doesn't sound like a Greek name.

J: Oh, actually it's Anastassakis

H: It's what?

J: Anastassakis.

H: Anastas--asskiss?

J: Anastas-asskiss!

H: Anastasasskiss, that's you?

J: Ha, that's me!

H: So you shortened it.

J: Yeah, well they changed it when my grandfather, when they all came over.

H: I shortened my name too.

J: Did you really? What was it before, Howie Mandelin?

H: It used to be Mandellllllllllllllll. So anyways, are you busy?

J: Yeah. I mean you know, I'm relaxing! I'm enjoying the little vacation.

H: Do you date?

J. [ clears her throat ] Nope.

H: No dates?

J: Nope!

H: Not for me, I'm not asking.

J: Are you asking for a date?

H: No, no, well I'm not allowed to!

J: Oh, you're not, that's right!

H: I'm a married guy!

J: You're actually right, forgive me, Jesus, what is happening to me?

H: She said no dating! In fact, I have a post-it note on me--

J: No dating! Things to do-- No dating!

H: I'm asking for the guys in the band! Because I try to live vicariously through single people. I've been married for about 20 years, with three kids.

J: I commend that!

H: Thank you, I'm not used to everything you say, getting applause..

J: Everything!

H: So I try to live vicariously through single people who are doing other things.. we just stay at home, last night we stayed home with the uh.. with the uh.. kids..

J: Kids, right.

H: And the wife and she rented movies.

J: Kids.

H: You know their names! I don't have names for them yet. I'm waiting for them to grow up, and they'll tell me what to call them. But you know what? I stayed home, my wife rents tapes, that's what I did last night.

J: Did you? Ohh, that's wonderful! That's the best kind of evening!

H: It is the best thing. We watched umm... Legends Of The Fall last night.

J: Yeah.

H: You like that tape?

J: ....... yeah.

H: So does my wife.

J: Yeah.

H: We see it a lot.

J: Yeah.

H: She likes Thelma and Louise, too.

J: Oh yeah. I would just stop, right now.

H: You want me to stop?

J: Yeah.

H: Okay, just.. inquiring minds wanna know!

J: A ha ha, oh yeah!

H: Is that weird that--

J: Wow, I can't believe you just did that!

H: You can't believe I did that?

J: I can't believe it!

H: I'm just learning!

J: That wasn't in our pre-interview!

H: Is that weird, though, that people even care about what you're doing privately?

J: Well, sure, I mean, although, you know, it's curiosity, I get it. I get it.

H: You get people like, stalking you, wanting to know every move?

J: It doesn't happen but uh.. that I don't quite get, no.

H: Do you get people following you into the supermarket, things like that?

J: There have been times when that's happened, yeah.

H: And how do you deal with that?

J: You just do! I don't know, Howie! You kinda go with the flow...

H: You go with the flow? There's an actual flow of people following you to the supermarket? And you're just caught up in it, swimming along with all these stalkers?

J: Yeah, exactly, just swimmin' along with them! And sometimes they get lost in the crowd and they lose you and then they "Ohh where is she Oh what happened"..

H: Well that's it. Do you ever wear disguises? Have you ever gone out in a disguise?

J: A couple times I've actually done a wig. Just for fun.

H: Really? But with you, you've got to be worried about that because you can put on a wig, people see you with a wig, and then America's wearing a wig! You know what I want to say to you?

J: What?

H: I want to say that you are absolutely adorable--

J: Thank you.

H: You are talented, and I can't, you know what? People come on these talk shows because they have something to plug. And you have a very busy schedule, I know you just finished Mike Judge's--

J: I have nothing to plug!

H: No, no! Don't laugh at that, no, she just did a movie with Mike Judge in Texas--

J: Yeah I did, that was fun.

H: The creator of Hank Hill, and FRIENDS is coming up for a new season, and you're off to Europe, you're gonna do another movie, and I think the coolest thing is that you'd just come here, and spend time with me just to sit and talk with me, and be here for me.

J: I wouldn't miss it for the world!