Luke was trying to keep busy with paper work so he wouldn't have to think of Laura. But it was impossible not to think of her. Anywhere he looked or anything he looked at reminded him of her in some way. He placed his pencil on the desk in frustration and sat back and closed his eyes. The last argument they just had in the club kept coming back to him. He felt guilty for what he said to her. He didn't mean to make her hurt that much. He never wanted to ever make her hurt like that. The last time he remembered her being hurt in that way was when Scott called her a tramp. It took her a long time to get passed that because she thought he was telling the truth. And Luke promised her he would never hurt her in that way, but he broke that promise.
Luke went over to his liquor stash to get a shot of whatever he got his hands on first when Lesley walked through the door. He looked at her and went back to his desk, picking the pencil up to pretend he was busy.
Les: Are you okay?
Luke: Yeah, sure. Just catching up on some paper work.
Les: That's all?
Luke looked up at Lesley and knew that she could read right through him. He knew that she was probably the one who could actually know what he was going through. While their situations were different, Rick had actually cheated on her while Laura thought Luke was dead, but the result felt the same... betrayal of the only person that you could possibly love.
Luke: I don't know what to feel right now, Les.
Les: I know.
Luke: It's all screwed up. Never in my wildest dreams did I expect something like this to happen. I really thought that when Laura told me about Nikolas, the secrets were over. I was wrong.
Les: She felt it was necessary.
Luke: I know she did, but it wasn't. I had a right to know who the father of her son was.
Les: What would you have done if she told you right away?
Luke: Who knows. I was never given that opportunity. She didn't trust me enough.
Les: Can it be that she just didn't want to hurt you?
Luke: That's what she says, but it's more. I know it is.
Les: Maybe she didn't want to hurt her son either. After all, Nikolas was led to believe his father was dead his whole life.
Luke: That's not my concern. If Stefan felt like keeping that a secret, then that's his business.
Les: But if Laura told you the truth, you would have made sure that Nikolas heard about it.
Luke: Possibly. Les, I can't tell you what I would have done. All I know is I would love to kill that bastard now for sleeping with my wife. I can't get that image out of my mind. Every time I close my eyes to go to sleep, I can see him with her. Touching her. Kissing her. It's driving me crazy.
Les: It's so long ago, Luke. She came back to you and only you. That was back in another time.
Luke: But that doesn't mean that the image of those two together is any less vivid. It was one thing when all I ever had nightmares about was her and Stavros. My nightmares where of him forcing himself on her. While that drove me crazy at times, this is a lot worse. This time I'm having nightmares of her being a willing participant. If only I had been smart enough to rid the world of every single Cassadine, none of this would have ever happened.
Les: And your daughter wouldn't have had a donor to keep her alive.
Luke: I would have found another donor.
Les: Luke, what's the real problem here? You have to know that Laura has been faithful to you ever since she got off that island.
Luke: I know. Les, I just can't easily forgive the fact that I've been played a fool for this whole marriage. She made me believe I was the father of her first born. She confided in me when she was pregnant with Lucky that she didn't feel old enough to be a mother. She should have known that she was since she was a mother already.
Les: So this is about Nikolas, not Stefan.
Luke: This is about the whole thing. I can't lie to you. Part of the problem is that Nikolas does exist. Every time I see that boy, I get sick to my stomach. He's a walking reminder of what the Cassadines took from me all those years ago. Every time I see him, I'm reminded of how I didn't spend my first wedding anniversary with my wife. How I was at the docks, thinking of her, knowing that I would never love that way again. Knowing that my life would never be the same because when I lost her, I also lost my heart.
Les: But she's back now Luke. That was so long ago and you've built a great marriage and a family. You can't live in the past.
Luke: I'm scared, Les.
Les: Of what?
Luke: Of her actually being capable of loving someone other than me. If she was able to do so once, then it's possible to do so again.
Les: You know that's not possible.
Luke: I don't know anything anymore. She tells me that she only loves me, but how can I believe her anymore? At one time, if she said that the world was flat, I would have believed her. I trusted every word that came out of her mouth. I trusted her more than I could ever trust anyone. I left myself vulnerable to her, and she used that against me. The last person I ever trusted that completely was my mother. She used to tell me that my father was a good man inside and did love her, and even though I saw differently, I trusted her. She ended up telling me that lie until the day she died. The day I opened up my eyes and saw the truth. And I swore on that day that I would never trust another person like that again. However, Laura came into my life, and I learned to trust her like I trusted my mother. But in the end, it turned out the same way. A disaster caused me to open my eyes, and now I see the truth. The truth that Laura was hiding from me all these years.
Les: You're acting like they both lied to you intentionally.
Luke: They did, don't you see? My mother didn't think I was old enough to understand who my father really was. So she lied about him instead of trusting me enough to tell me that he was a jerk. Laura didn't trust my love for her enough that I would stand by her even if she told me the truth about her and Stefan. She didn't trust me enough to admit to her mistake.
Les: She doesn't regard Nikolas as a mistake.
Luke: He is. She should have never been put in that situation. She should never have been a captive on an island and kept away from her whole family. If she wasn't kidnapped, Nikolas would have never been born.
Les: How can you ever think of a child as a mistake, Luke? Laura loves her child because he is a part of her.
Luke: And a part of Stefan? He'll always have a bond with Laura because of that. I can't get passed that.
Les: Why not? You asked Laura to get passed the fact that you and Holly almost had a child together. If Holly didn't have a miscarriage, would you have loved Laura any less?
Luke: Of course not.
Les: And you would have been able to love that child even though he or she wasn't Laura's?
Luke: Yes.
Les: Why?
Luke: Because he would have been my child. Because he would have been a part of me.
Les: Then how is Laura's situation any different, Luke. Can't you see what you're saying? You shared something special with another woman when you thought Laura was dead. You two will always have that bond because you almost had a child. How is it different?
Luke: Because I told her the whole story when she came back to me. I gave her the opportunity to choose to be with me despite the fact that I was capable of caring for another woman. I just wish that she had done me the same courtesy.
Les: And...?
Luke: And what?
Les: If she had?
Luke: I would have chosen her. I can't picture ever spending my life with anyone else.
Les: So why don't you prove that to her now? She's home, in your bedroom, crying her eyes out and waiting for you to come home. If you tell her everything you've just told me, I think the both of you will be able to work passed this.
Luke: I can't. Not yet.
Les: You are such a stubborn man, Luke. If you don't start acting now to save your marriage, then you might find out later on that there is nothing left to save. Are you willing to risk that just because your pride was hurt?
Luke: It's not my pride that I'm trying to repair here, Les. It's my heart. I'm still trying to find all the pieces to it after she walked right over it.
Les: No, Luke, it's your pride. I've listened to every word you said to me. You can accept the fact that she does love you and chose you over any other man. You can't accept the fact that she was capable of caring for someone else and that she is capable of loving someone other than your children. You're going to have to grow up someday, Luke, and I hope it's soon. Laura is waiting for you and will wait as long as she has the strength to. She's very strong and it's possible that she can wait the rest of her life, but I wouldn't take that chance if I were you. Sooner or later she's going to have to realize that she can't spend every single moment of her life laying on your bed next to your picture, holding on to something that you're not willing to acknowledge. Every second you are here in this club instead of at home, every time you push her away when she tries to make a connection, you are losing something that can only be found once in a lifetime. If you're willing to throw everything away because of this, then sit here and drink your life away. The longer you take, the only thing you'll have to hold on to are the memories. My daugher might be willing to throw her life away to wait for you, but I won't allow it. She's tried to explain and she's tried to hear your side of it. A person can only try something so many times before they realize it's useless to try again.
Luke: It's not that simple.
Les: I never said it was. But you're not the type of man to turn down a challenge, especially when at the end of it, there's something very special and worth going through hell over. It's your choice. I know Laura's willing to take on this challenge. How about you?
Stefan is sitting by the fireplace when his cell phone rings. "Stefan Cassadine."
Man: I have some information for you. Laura Spencer is at home in her bedroom, sleeping next to a picture of Luke. Commissioner Donnelly and his wife are in the Spencer living room right now.
Stefan: What about Spencer?
Man: He is at his club talking to Lesley Webber. I planted a bug in Ms. Webber's purse and heard their conversation.
Stefan: What did it entail?
Man: Exactly what you thought it would. Luke is too angry to forgive Laura at the moment, but Lesley is convincing him to go home. He is refusing to do so at the moment, but I think he will listen. I don't know when though.
Stefan: Good. And Lasha sleeps by Luke's picture every night?
Man: As far as I know. She started sleeping next to it ever since Luke started sleeping on the couch. I don't think she'll stop doing so any time soon.
Stefan: Good work. You know what to do next. Find a way to make sure that Luke will check on his wife. I'll have a surprise for him when he does.
Man: Yes, Mr. Cassadine. I can guarentee Mr. Spencer's presense at the house. How will the surprise be placed?
Stefan: Leave that one to me.
Stefan hangs up the phone and walks over to a picture of him and Nikolas. You've crossed the wrong man, Lasha. By this time tomorrow, you will lose your great love and I will have timoria.
