Part 10

Buffy had by no means been any expert at taking anyone's guidance and so subsequently just about a month after the private lunch with her mother, she had yet to even endeavour to elucidate how she was feeling - complete or in part - to Angelus and as an alternative was merely letting it fester deep within herself.

Regrettably that was not even the most unpleasant of it all, her home had become somewhat of a combat zone; with both her and Angelus' tempers clashing sporadically for no perceptible rationale. It had become so horrendous there that Kathy had taken to spending virtually all of her non-school hours either at the library or with Dawn.

In an attempt to evade the increasingly escalating friction and to take her mind off of her numerous problems, she arranged to go along with Willow to The Bronze. Buffy had not been back there since just before she had dropped out of college - the first time around - and she was comforted to see that some things really did under no circumstances change. The decor was unerringly the unaffected, high schoolers and college kids were everywhere and she was sitting there all alone at a table - as she always had. The only apparent differences that she could see was that she was more despondent than she had ever been - despite the gold band she wore - and the reason she was sitting alone, Willow was with Lindsey.

Heaving a sigh, she settled back into the uncomfortable chair and wished that she was somewhere else, anywhere else, but that was not going to happen unless she went home and she was just not prepared to do that just yet. So she sat through the next hours gritting her teeth, as you would expect it did not improve her already unpleasant temperament; even Willow's intermittent companionship did not help. And so after a while she decided it would be best if she did go home since she only seemed to upsetting her best friend and pissing off the man who was purportedly her husband's.

As you would have thought the mansion was in absolute darkness when she returned, he had not even left on a small lamp for her this time. Notwithstanding this, Buffy made her way unhurriedly up to the generously proportioned bedroom she and Angelus were still sharing, but at the very last moment she changed course and entered the nursery to check on Meghan. As her luck would have it, her breathtaking baby daughter opened her eyes just as she peeked over the railing of the oak crib and Buffy instantaneously used it as a justification to hold her close - something that she had intermittent opportunity to do.

She was unconscious of how long she merely sat there with the ever-growing bundle of joy sandwiched in her arms, but she did not in reality care either. It was an overwhelming experience just to sit there with her child and basically just bond. A minuscule noise was all it took to alert Buffy to the fact that she was no longer alone, but as she turned her worried gaze towards the doorway there was disenchantment that it was her sister-in-law and not her husband standing there.

Looking sleep dishevelled in a pair of dark pink silk pyjamas with a monogrammed 'K' embroidered in a lighter pink upon the top pocket, Kathy took more than a few seconds to speak. "Buffy?" she mumbled endeavouring to restrain a yawn. "Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, just a little mother-daughter bonding going on," Buffy replied as she turned her complete concentration back to the infant in her arms. "Why did you ask?"

Leaning roughly against the doorframe Kathy sighed, "I do live here. Do you really think that I don't know what's going on between my brother and you?"

 Buffy could not bring herself to meet Kathy's gaze because she knew if she did she would completely break down. "What do you want me to do about it?"

"Apologize to him, make him apologize to you - frankly I am beyond caring at this point. I'm just sick and tired of living in a war zone."

She heard Kathy walk away and she silently muttered to herself and her baby, "So am I."

When Angelus awoke the next morning, he found himself unpredictably alone in the king-sized bed, Buffy had not come home and slept in his arms - the solitary reassurance he still had. An objectionable feeling washed over him and he swiftly walked across the hall to either substantiate or rebuff the unreasonable fear that Buffy had left him and taken the baby with her.

Relief swamped his body - along with an immense dosage of covetousness - to find his daughter sound asleep in his wife's arms. This was in actuality the foremost time he had seen the two loves of his life bond in such a way and inside it began to diminish some of the culpability he had been feeling as of late.

Quietly he exited the room and headed downstairs towards the kitchen to make a start on breakfast - as he usually did. However as he entered the foyer he spotted Kathy, loaded down with books and her school bag attempting to leave inaudibly. Angelus was tempted to call her back, but desisted from doing so. He knew that things had not been pleasurable for his baby sister, living with a newborn and his and Buffy's invariable arguments and therefore he could not begrudge her any peace she found.

Before too long Angelus found himself dishing up the scrambled eggs that he had prepared for breakfast, when Buffy appeared still cradling Meghan in her petite arms. Buffy looked so charmingly sleep bedraggled and befuddled, that it caused his heart to contract excruciatingly at the thought of their recent estrangement.

"Good morning," Angelus said endeavouring to keep his voice as convivial as was feasible. "Are you hungry?"

Buffy nodded ever so slightly as she adjusted Meghan's position in her arms, "A little."

Angelus placed the plates onto the undersized breakfast table, while Buffy arrange Meghan in the basinet that they kept downstairs for her before she without a sound slipped into the seat across from him. The two so-called adults sat there in an unnerving stillness as they ate their breakfast, pretending that nothing was the slightest bit wrong between them.

As Buffy went to get from the table, Angelus at long last recovered a sufficient amount from his self-pitying funk to take action. Grasping onto her daintily boned wrist forcing her attention onto him.

"Buffy?"

"What?" she asked turning her hazel eyes away from the tremendous intensity of his chocolate brown ones.

Angelus held back the sigh that threatened to erupt from within him at her response. "I think we need to talk about this-"

"About what?" she cut him off still refusing to meet his never veering gaze.

"Our problems."

Buffy finally returned his look, but instead of sweet relief showing her eyes there was a blaze of anger giving them a dark green tinge. "We don't have any problems."

Angelus' displeasure ultimately passed the breaking point, for weeks he had been on edge - repudiating himself what was lawfully his - and still his audacious diminutive wife denied any problems between them. He snapped without stopping to think, simply letting his anger get the better of him. "How about the problems of you acting like a monumental brat?"

Buffy's eyes at long last met his own, but instead of seeing the customarily unvarying look of defencelessness in her hazel orbs there was now antagonism; alighting them and turning them an more or less emerald green. "I am not a BRAT!" she seethed through clenched teeth.

"Could have fooled me and the rest of the world by the way you have been acting as of late."

"Me? What the fuck are you talking about? I am not the one here who shuts out everyone and spends every waking moment cutting me out of Meghan's time."

"What the hell are you talking about? If I didn't take care of Meghan then who would? You? I don't think so. You have shown almost no interest in her since we returned from the hospital."

"I would have if you let me spend even a second in her company."

Frustration mounted within him and he needed to find an outlet for its angry manifestation. Without a word of warning he struck out, smashing his fist against the tiled countertop of the countertop. Then he simply walked out of the room and away from Buffy and the baby, leaving her to wonder where he was going and if he was ever coming back.