Author: Jennifer

Rating Nc-17 Be warned!

This is a B/A story eventually but there is a ton of C/A in this. Its sexual and somewhere it will get dark.

Remember I have an imagination so they may not be in character like you know them now.

What if Angel had been the dork set in Season 3. This is set in the nowish (season seven season four) but things are very very different things have changed after season three because that particular season happened Jennifer Style!!. Life is not perfect

For Buffy and Angel and Cordy well you shall have to read how their lives change! Please do not read if you do not like Angel and Cordy sexual! I get nasty in this one!

Thank you to everyone who has sent emails, cards begging for more of this story for more of anything. I promised you I would sit down and write and I am. I am feeling better, I have my days or my weeks. I cant promise that the next chapters will come out super fast but I am working on them but you know the next 9 Chapters you can read without banging your head for more! They will be sent to the group.

You guys are Angels!

Jenn

*

When we’re younger, we believe in so many things. We believe our parents will keep us safe and always love us. That we could never do anything wrong in our parent's eyes. That they are there to protect us from the things that make us shiver as we walk into a dark room. The things that make us peek up around the covers as we huddle in bed, wondering what that creak was or what that small scary noise was.

We believe that our Teddy bear will keep the Boogieman away at night, if we hug tight enough. When we’re little, we don’t know of the horrors in the World, that people are good, that there is nothing evil out there to scare us. We truly believe that people are good at heart. As we grow up, we know that our friends will be with us for life. That we will always be able to trust them. That they could do us no harm. They are the people we love, why would they harm us? Friends don’t keep secrets …they are there to share dolls with or play hide and seek.

We believe in things like love. Love is something sacred. You remember the White Knight from all the fairy tales you ever read, but mostly from the cartoons you watched as a child. You could imagine that a dark handsome man would come sweep you off your feet, when you found yourself in trouble. The trouble is when you realize the Knight betrays you; you start to stop believing in things like love.

Life is funny, every day you grow older; you realize that a small notch has been chiseled off your dreams and beliefs. Is it you that chisels off that small piece of our heart that still believes in simple things like hope? Or perhaps it’s the people around you?

Is there a God? In some way or another most people worship a higher being. Someone for us to turn our dreams and anger too. Someone for us to pray to when we get scared or someone to talk to when we need someone to listen to, but does that mean a God exists?

Buffy Summers sighed and stared straight into her friend's eyes. There is no God, she decided. This wasn’t something she decided right that minute; it wasn’t something she decided after that day. She had made up her mind years ago. So much tragedy in her young life. She was only twenty-one, died twice, watched as her baby girl…

She closed her eyes and blinked back the tears. She wasn’t going to think of her, not now for if she did she would also think about her sister and mother. Right now they couldn’t afford for her to go up to her room and try to remember what they looked like and bawl like a baby. She had to concentrate. So much work to do, so many lives to save, always so much work to do. No break for the weary or the broken.

“You're right, we can’t do this alone. We...we are not ready and I’m not sure we will ever be ready but I don’t believe it’s ready either,” She said grimacing.

It wasn’t the pain that made her grimace, well she was pretty sure she had some internal bleeding from Mr. Super Vamp but it was the idea of where she was going to have to get the help from.

“Buffy?” Willow whispered, staring at her friend, cautiously and watchful.

Buffy eyed each of the occupants in the room, including her ex-watcher who had run and left her in her time of need. The two Slayers in Waiting who knew that they were the last of the last. That one had fled and died and Buffy had been beaten severely that she could barely walk. If she didn’t have a chance then what chance did these two girls who had no powers at all do against the big bad?

“Pack up,” She demanded, wincing as she reached for the phone.

“Buffy?” Willow asked again.

“We can not win this by ourselves. We are not running but we need help and we are going to get it,” She groaned. She was in serious need of some pain medicine.

“Who?” Xander asked.

Buffy stopped for a minute; she knew they were not going to like this idea at all. “We are going to bust Faith out of jail.”

No one said anything, for there was nothing to say. She had made up her mind and she knew that by now they would follow her. If they didn’t, they knew where the door was.

Part 2

“Shit,” Angel grunted as Cordelia pulled out the piece of wood from his neck.

“Shh.. you big baby. I just don’t understand why you four grown…errr men decided to take on that demon all on your own,” She said as she placed a piece of gauze up to his neck to stop the bleeding.

He reached up and grabbed the cause and groaned as he tried to sit up. He was pretty sure most of his ribs were broken. He felt the small kiss on his check as Cordelia got up and went to help Lorne who looked as bad as he felt.

“Da da,” babbled his son who tottled into the room.

Angel tried to lift up his arm to grab his son who was running at full speed that his little one and half year old legs would let him. Connor was running toward him still babbling ‘da da da da’ and his son was about to throw himself on him when Fred caught him in mid air.

“Angel I’m sorry,” She babbled grabbing the wiggling youngster who had started screaming for his daddy.

“Its ok Fred,” Angel croaked out.

“I know you don’t like him to see you like this but he’s so slippery,” She said still holding on to Connor who was doing his best to get out of her arms.

“Like father like son,” Cordelia said smiling at the toddler.

“Humph stop mooning over those two and help me pumpkin,” Lorne muttered.

“Lorne you ok, man,” Gunn asked from across the room holding his shoulder.

“I’ve had worse….I think,” Lorne muttered.

“Where’s Wesley?” Angel asked.

“Here,” Wes said coming out his office. “We need to figure out what this demon is,” He muttered walking by Angel with a limp.

“Wes perhaps you need to sit down,” Angel suggested.

“What did it mean, ‘She’s not safe with him’” Wesley asked staring directly at Angel.

Angel did his best to shrug; he honestly didn’t have a clue as to what the demon meant.

“Who’s she?” Cordelia said slightly jealous.

“I don’t know,” Angel muttered pushing his back to the wall and scooting upward. Cordelia dropped what she was doing with Lorne and grabbed Angel’s arm. He grunted in pain but still gave her a thankful look.

“Look I just want something to eat,” Gunn groaned,” And perhaps a nice hot bubb…bath,” He trailed off.

Cordelia and Lorne snickered.

“Da da da da da,” Connor babbled holding on to his father’s leg.

Angel looked at his son and smiled. The first year had been so difficult with demons of every type trying to get his miracle child. He still wasn’t sure how he came to be. He just knew it was Darla and his child. He grimaced remembering when Darla had shown up. Cordelia had been so mad. However as she put it they were on a break.

He tried not to think about Sunnydale anymore. He saw on the news sometimes about something mysterious happening every once in awhile but just typically ignored anything that was happening there. He had left with the idea of making a new life. Of course there were times he found it ironic his new life had ended up with Cordelia. He had figured she would just be good in bed. He had started his fling with the cheerleader not long after the incident with Faith trying to bring Angelus out. Buffy had said she needed space, so he decided to give it to him. He knew his soul was safe but didn’t feel the need to tell her about it. They were long over with…long…long…over, he sighed.

Of course he really had no choice in the matter of leaving town. Buffy had caught him making out with Cordelia in the Bronze. He had known it was a risky spot but it turned Cordelia on to know she was fooling around with the Slayer’s boyfriend right underneath her nose. And that’s how Buffy found them, in a corner with Cordelia on top and thrusting her hips. Their mouths fused together trying to keep the moans down so they wouldn’t get caught and kicked out the Bronze. After they had reached their peek and climbed down they heard the sound of clapping.

He had known who it was immediately but when he looked over Cordelia’s flushed face to his beloved, he saw nothing. No emotion… nothing on her face. She just looked at them and cocked an eye brow. Cordelia had quickly caught what has his attention and smirked but her smirk fell away as she noticed Buffy’s _expression. Angel knew this was not what Cordelia wanted; she wanted to see the blonde fall, to have misery but to see nothing?

That was when Buffy had ordered them both out of the city in less than two hours. Cordelia had ranted and raved but he wasn’t stupid, Buffy could take him down easily and Cordelia didn’t have a chance. Cordelia on the hand had decided to tell her that she couldn’t do that.

Buffy had just smirked at them and turned to walk away, with her back to them she yelled two hours. Angel had felt defeated, he truly loved her he just wanted to get back at her for saying she needed more space and not trusting him. He needed her, he wanted to feel her silky skin, he wanted to hear her moan his name or scream it when he made her cum, but he just lost it. It was foolish and selfish of him to try anything with Cordelia but he was a man…he needed things. He couldn’t trust himself around Buffy. Cordelia wasn’t perfect happiness, not then and not now. She was a distraction; she knew what to do when to do it.

However by the looks of it she hadn’t been affected by what he had done. The most humiliating thing was to walk by Xander who smirked and said, “Ill take care of her for you, Dead Boy.”

“Angel,” Cordy said shaking him out of his thoughts.

“Sorry,” He said as Cordy picked up what had become of as their child. She was pretty much the mother to Connor and the lover to his father. “I need to feed,” He muttered and walked away.

“Wow,” Fred shouted.

“Oh Dear,” Wesley said as everyone turned to look out the sky. It was ten in the morning and the sun was going down. “Not good,” Wesley said running back to the office and picking up the phone.

“Wesley who are you calling?” Fred asked.

“The Council,” Wesley said in the most serious tone anyone had ever heard before.

“The who?” Gunn asked.

“The Council, stuffy English guys with weird accents and deals with the Slay...” Cordy trailed off looking at Angel.

Angel just shrugged. “Good guys depending on your perspective,” he muttered. He was starting to feel better and picked up his son and all he wanted to do was to head upstairs and fall asleep with his son in his arms.

“That’s weird,” Wesley muttered. He placed the phone down and picked it back up to try to call again.

“Busy?” Lorne asked.

“Unavailable,” Wesley said picking up his cell phone and turning it on.

Angel from where he was standing saw him punch in the number three and hit send. He knew it was Giles’s number, he also knew the two Ex-Watchers sometime traded information when needed. Giles meant Buffy, which he had done and excellent job of trying to forget…

“Damnit,” Wesley snapped.

“Wes?” Cordy asked.

“Number disconnected,” He muttered. Wesley looked up at Angel for what looked like permission.

“You can get the information without his help,” Angel muttered and turned to walk back upstairs when the door crashed open. The gang grabbed whatever they had as a weapon and Fred grabbed a shoe and a phone book and they all stared at the door. Angel placed his son behind his back and his eyes went wide.

“Hello lover,” Buffy sneered from the door.

Part 3

Buffy barged right into the hotel and walked right past the people who were gaping at her.

"Close your mouths it doesn't become any of you," She snapped.

Willow chuckled a little and walked in right behind her. Both Buffy and Willow went straight for the desk and plugged in the new laptop that Xander, Buffy and Xander chipped in to buy. Since Giles wasn't around half the time they found that the internet usually had everything they were looking for. Like a huge data base of monsters and things that go bump in the night.

"Fine what you can," Buffy whispered urgently to the redheaded hacker.

"Not a problem I'm Internet Girl," She whispered with a wobbly grin.

"I thought that was Lesbian Girl," Cordelia sneered being the first one to recover from the invasion of the Scoobies.

"I think you better watch your tone," Xander said standing behind her.

"I think you better watch yours," Gunn said.

Xander gave him a one over and smirked and walked over to where the girls were standing.

"Mr. Giles, good Lord I was trying to call you," Wesley said rushing up the stairs towards the senior Watcher.

Buffy noticed Giles giving Wesley a small smile but she was too tense to care what was going on around her and she knew there were a pair of eyes on her.

"Buffy?" Angel whispered.

Buffy tensed up completely. She had wondered if she was going to be able to handle being around Angel and Cordelia. She wasn't a kid anymore; she grew up hard and fast but to be around the person whom she had loved so much with everything she had only to know he had betrayed her? It hurt, but they sure weren't going to see it.

You're a tough Bitch, she thought to herself. Now if only she could actually believe that. Sure to baddies she was the meanest thing they had ever seen. Lately most of the time bad guys just turned and ran from her. Did she have something on her face? She wasn't ugly damnit!

"You can't just come in here," Cordelia snapped grabbing Buffy's arm.

Buffy pushed her off gently. As much as she wanted to Bitch slap Cordelia there really wasn't much time.maybe after the apocalypse? Now in her dreams, Buffy stifled the grin.

"Someone got a piece of you didn't they Buffy," Cordelia smirked noticing the bruises and the cut on her face.

Buffy stared at the woman in front of her. She really hadn't changed from the spiteful teenager. "Cordelia your still a bitch aren't you, you should really look in the mirror. With that fake blonde look you got going on and the tightness of your clothes, one would think you work the hotel like a two dollar hooker on crack," Buffy said softly and turned back to Willow.

Cordelia along with most of the LA crew were caught off guard by the soft spoken way Buffy said that.

"You can't talk to her like that," Fred shouted grabbing Gunn's arm.

Buffy just shrugged and Willow cocked an eyebrow at her best friend but Buffy ignored her and settled her eyes on the monitor which was coming to life.

"Get out!" Cordelia screamed.

"Good God Cordelia, grow up," Xander said staring at Willow not bothering to look at his ex-girlfriend.

Buffy smiled slightly knowing he would never forgive Cordelia for cheating on him with Angel.

"Why are you here," Said Angel darkly.

Giles walked more into the room and had two young girls with him. "Wesley, meet the last two Slayers' in Waiting on the planet, I'm afraid..," Giles said thickly.

"Excuse me?" Wes said taking off his glasses and wiping them quickly and glared at the two young women.

"That's right, I'm Molly and this here Kennedy, we had Annabelle but no she wouldn't listen to Buffy, stupid girl she was," Molly said marching into the room.

"No one listens to Buffy," Cordy snapped.

"You must be Angel, cuter in person, wiped out too many Slayers for my taste." Kennedy muttered.

"You obviously didn't read the entire newsletter on him. I'm personally glad Buffy left him," Molly said walking over to Buffy.

"Newsletter?" Angel asked slightly curious and perturbed.

Buffy smirked trying to hide a giggle unlike Willow who couldn't help herself. It was then that something caught her attention. It sounded soft and Buffy turned around to face Angel and noticed his hands were behind him.

"Da da da dadadadadada, bababa," the tiny voice said.

Her eyes grew wide as he picked up a small child.

"Is that a child?" Xander asked.

"What do you think?" Cordelia snapped.

"Yours?" Buffy asked she couldn't help herself. She couldn't take her eyes off the child in Angel's arms. Her eyes watered instantly thinking of her own baby girl who had only lived a few hours.

"Yes," Cordelia said smugly.

Buffy tried to hide the pain that hit her face instead she turned back to Willow.

"How's that possible?" Giles asked.

"We are really not sure," Wes said with a perplexed look.

"Love, he was made out of love, isn't that right honey," Cordelia said smoothly.

Buffy noticed Angel wasn't saying much and she couldn't get the little boys face out of her mind. It wasn't fair..why should they get happiness?

"Right now it's not important, things are happening and the Council..is gone," Giles said stepping into the room further and ignoring the looks of the people he didn't know.

"We have to get Spike," Buffy muttered trying to get her baby girl off her mind and the squirming toddler in Angel's arm. Spike would help her! She would be able to get Faith out of jail, go kick some ass and save Spike...who would help her? If he wasn't more insane than the last time she saw him.

Buffy sighed.

"Spike!" Angel growled.

Before Buffy could defend the loony vampire the front door burst open. "I told him to knock," Sam said timidly.

"Right I'm going to knock on his door," Riley snapped.

"Riley, Sam!" Buffy shouted and ran over and threw her body into Riley's arms and the man in question swung her around in a circle and squeezed. No one heard the jealous growl that emerged from Angel and even if they did they didn't acknowledge it.

Buffy turned to Sam and her eyes widened. "You shouldn't have come," She whispered placing her hand on Sam's belly. Her eyes turning to water almost instantly again. Losing Abby had been hard and she had done her best to stay away from children and pregnant mothers and now here she was surrounded.

"I had too, we had to" Sam whispered gripping Buffy's hand. Giving her a smile and grabbing and hugging her!

Buffy almost sobbed out loud when she felt the baby in Sam's tummy kick.

"Its ok, I'm sorry," Sam whispered.

Buffy gave her a smile and gave her hug," Thank you but please don't be sorry, it wasn't your fault, be happy," she whispered. She reached up and patted Sam's belly, " You little one are going to go sit down on the couch with your mommy and not move, nothings going to happen to you," Buffy whispered.

"Buffy it's good to see you," Riley said kissing her on the cheek and grabbing Sam's hand.

Cordelia started to laugh," Buffy you just cant keep a man!"

Buffy gave her an odd look and turned to Riley who just shrugged.

"What's she talking about?" Sam asked.

"Who knows," Riley said staring down at his wife with adoration on his face.

Buffy turned to look at the people in the room; she didn't recognize half of them but didn't care. If they were working for Angel then they knew what they were doing she hoped. She had no idea what was happening with Angel these days. Hell she had done her best to stay away from the dark vampire. He brought up too many memories, some good but mostly painful. She hadn't seen him in almost three years since their run in at the police station because of Faith.

She had been working for the Initiative then. Riley had been her partner in trying to break down the walls of the Initiative. He had been great; they had pretended to be more than just partners since it had been easier to get into the Initiative that way. Of course Riley had been married only certain people knew that, the Scoobies included.

Buffy turned and grabbed Sam's hand and dragged her to the couch.

"Sit," she ordered.

Sam gave her a solute," Yes Ma'am."

Buffy took a huge breath and looked up at her once lover. The one she had given her heart too, sent to hell, brought back and he sent her to hell with betrayal. She never once looked at the baby in his arms.

"I'm not going to apologize for barging in but at the moment we need all the help we can get and by the looks of it you do as well however your problem is not as big as you may think," Buffy said out loud and clear as day.

"I beg your pardon?" Wesley sputtered.

"You don't know what they hell you're talking about," Cordelia started.

"I can and I will, you see the demon you are most likely fighting is a weapon. We have to go to the beginning of this and defeat it! Right now the World depends on what we do here, we can band together, even though most of us dislike the other or we can walk away and let the world be destroyed but no matter what I have to break out Faith tonight, I need her help and I need to get Spike," She snapped.

"Faith," Wesley shuddered.

"Spike?" Gunn asked.

"I need another Slayer, and I need my right hand," Buffy snapped at the ex-watcher.

Wesley nodded but frowned obviously confused. "Wait your right hand?" Wesley asked.

"You heard her," Xander said.

"White Knight to the end?" Angel sneered.

Xander looked up at him and grinned, "Someone has too."

"What exactly is going on?" said a tiny brunette who was standing beside Molly.

"Your not so typical end of the world," Xander said cheerfully.

"I'm Fred but doesn't that happen a lot?" She asked.

Xander chuckled, "No you see there is the typical which happens every month or maybe every few months in which we know we can defeat but this is the not so typical in which people are going to die..again," he said staring at Buffy thinking of Joyce and Dawn.

Buffy turned back to the group and made sure not to look at Angel when she said this. "We are dealing with something very old, the first actually. The First Evil, its old as time itself. He.made Spike do some things and we have seen.."Buffy started to whisper and closed her eyes and took a breath, " Its decided to wage war and it started with all the Slayers in Waiting and the Watchers till it eventually killed all but what you see here. I'm not even sure Faith is alive," She said.

"Don't forget Ubber Vamp," Xander said cheerfully.

"The what?" The demon asked.

Buffy grimaced remembering Annabel's body and her own crashing through the building. She still wasn't sure why she was still alive. She was pretty sure the First had something up his sleeve for her. And she was sure it wasn't anything good.

"It was a Turok-Han. As Neanderthals are to human beings, Turok-Han are to vampires. They're ancient, primordial, ferociously strong killing machines, which live off blood, single-minded as animals. They are the vampires. They have the same fears as vampires however I honestly thought they were a myth," Giles said to the group gathered in front of him.

"My God, we were told they were a myth," Wesley said dropping the book he had in his hand.

"Their not," Buffy said coarsely.

"You met one?" Angel asked.

She turned to look him in the eyes. She hid all emotion she was feeling at the moment. "Yes and I don't understand why I'm alive," she grimaced pulling up her sleeves and showing her stomach which was completely covered with bruises and cuts.

"Buffy." Angel whispered his eyes holding horror.

"Buffy why didn't you call sooner," Riley demanded storming over and laying a hand on her stomach. Buffy hissed and pulled down her shirt. Riley grabbed her arms and turned her around and pulled up her shirt so he could see her back.

"God Damnit," Riley shouted.

Angel let out a small growl.

"Tis nothing," Buffy whispered.

"Are you like this all over?" Riley asked.

Buffy shrugged and went back to Willow.

"Angel?" Cordy asked walking over slowly shaking her hips. Bitch, Buffy thought. God she wanted to scream it!

"Found it," Willow shouted.

Buffy was only paying half attention to her friend instead she was watching Angel and Cordelia walk upstairs with their..son. Their son? Why me?

"Buffy?" Willow said grabbing her hand.

Buffy gave her friend a sad smile and looked at the computer.

It wasn't fair but then again she had long stop believing that her life was fair.

Part 4

As soon as they were out of sight Cordelia started in on Buffy and Angel wanted to tune her out but he couldn't, he just couldn't. There was a certain blonde downstairs that messed with every one of his senses that he still had control over. As soon as she walked in he smelled her. He had wanted to push her against the wall and attack her. He missed her mouth, so sweet and hot. The way her body moved against his, the way she moaned his name.

"Angel, she has to leave! She had no right barging in here like she owned the place," Cordelia ranted as she walked around their living quarters.

"I agree," Angel muttered trying to sooth his son into sleep. He would say anything to make Cordelia stop bitching.

"Make her leave," Cordelia said, stomping her foot with her hands on her hips.

Angel turned to look at her. "Cordelia I think we may need the help. She had no right to not warn us, but we need the help and they need us."

"Ha! You just want to get back in their good graces," Cordelia snapped.

"I lost that a long time ago and I honestly don't care about their respect," He snapped. Knowing it was the truth, Buffy would never let him near her.

"You're a liar! You love her, don't you?!" She sneered. Her face screwing up into a nasty scowl.

He walked over to her and gave her a winning smile that he knew blew her mind and made her drool. "You know that's not true," he said, rubbing his hands over her shoulders, ignoring the pain in his body. He was still hurting, didn't she understand that?

"You love me?" She whispered, her breath going up a notch. He could smell her arousal, listened to her breathing become hitched and almost labored.

Angel never answered but kissed the inside of her neck. He closed his eyes and breathed in the vanilla. Vanilla was what he craved and what Cordelia now wore. It helped with the illusion that the hot body wasn't Cordelia's that it was the woman downstairs. He had gone to great lengths in trying to make the brunette into his Buffy. He knew it was sick, but he didn't care. Cordelia stayed with him. He always left the door open and even if they fought, she came back. He had no ties to her and never made promises. He didn't have too.

He reached up and touched her blonde hair that almost matched Buffy's in color. It had been expensive but he wanted her blonde. Cordelia had never said a word, amd sometimes he wondered if she was smart enough to figure out what he was doing or was it she simply didn't care? Was it because she had him and Buffy didn't? Didn't matter, he ran his fingers through the blonde mane, thinking of his beloved downstairs that hated him.

He closed his eyes and groaned as Cordelia took off his shirt. It had been so long since he had seen her eyes, and to see them with emotion. He knew he should have said something about Connor not being Cordelia's, but he had been in shock seeing the blonde whirlwind. He never thought he would see her again and he never thought he would see her in his hotel with Connor. So much pain had flickered through her eyes. Was he the cause of all that?

He felt Cordelia's hot breath on his neck and felt her bite down. He knew she wanted him to bite her and he had come close a few times. He didn't want to make her his mate and he knew she wanted it. Found it in some book he had brought with him.

He shucked his jeans off and pulled her closer to him and almost ripped the shirt off her. He unsnapped the bra with ease and placed his hands to her breast. He mentally pictured the tiny breast that fit perfect in his hands not the oversized ones he was pulling on.

Cordelia moaned with passion and said his name. He would always remember how Buffy said his name. So sweet and full of passion and love. She always looked at him with love and adoration in her eyes. He missed it.

Cordelia threw off her jeans and tossed them across the room and Angel slid her black panties off her. The same ones he had bought Buffy as Angelus. Angelus had wanted her, but she never gave in. Angelus had loved to pick out expensive things for the hot Slayer and leave them in her bedroom. Angel would never tell her he had found a counter spell for her uninvitation spell. Angelus had wanted to take her on the floor, on silk sheets, try some bondage, but mostly he wanted to hear her scream his name. He wanted her beside him always. Wanted to make her his mate and was going to at the first chance he found. Angel had the same thoughts but had quenched them, but the idea of her being his for life. For her to be immortal in the sense they were together had aroused him.

It was getting him hot as he thought about it now. He pushed Cordelia to the bed and she fell down. She propped her head on her elbow and licked her red pouty lips.

Angel sat on the edge of the bed and crawled upward and spread her legs. God, Buffy had been so perfect. Her juices had tasted like heaven. Her tight pussy had been dripping before he had even had the chance to lap them up. He concentrated on the clit and stuffed fingers in Cordelia's pussy. He knew she would be ready, she always was. Turning her on wasn't hard, he had practice. He knew what women wanted. He knew where to kiss and where to touch, where to pinch and how to be rough or when to be gentle. Angelus had been a lover and Angel just took over from where he took off. Soul or no, he knew what to do with a woman.

However with Buffy, he had been so damn scared. He could feel Angelus quaking as well. The demon loved the woman as much as the man did. Was he a man? He had wanted to please her, to make sure she remembered him. That no man would be able to please her like he did. God she had been perfect, quivering in his arms. Shaking with need. Her tight little body, her strong legs, her sensual mouth.

Angel growled with need. His passion was starting to overtake him.

"Love me," Cordelia cried out.

His eyes shot open as he remembered Buffy saying the same thing years ago after Spike.

"Make me cum baby," Cordelia shouted, her breathing shallow.

Angel stopped what he was doing and heard Cordy scream with want. He enjoyed torturing the brunette. Now, had it been Buffy ,he wouldn't have been able to resist. Of course he had never had a second chance to fuck her. After he regained his soul back he had eaten her several times and god what a mouth she had on her but once almost too late he had driven into her. Both of them lost in passion and it was then Buffy had knocked him off. He had raged about it for days and then she came to him with a proposal.

Faith..Buffy knew they had done something. He never said that they hadn't. He was a man who needed things and he had been so frustrated with Buffy over not letting him finish. Sure she had a valid reason and he didn't want Angelus out as much as she did, but damn her. Faith reminded him of a whore and nothing more. She wasn't soft, she had been all muscles and it had been rough! She knew way too much about a man's anatomy and exactly what to do. Buffy had been wiling to learn and be submissive but Faith, she took over. It had excited him more than he let on. He kept thinking about Buffy being domineering and he knew it wouldn't take her that to let her passion shine through and take over.

He flipped Cordelia over so she was on her stomach. He raised her ass in the air and the brunette instantly went to her hands and knees. This was his favorite position with her. He didn't have to see her face just the blonde tresses. He grabbed a hand full of her hair and she grunted. He slid in her with a force and she screamed. He grunted and pounded in her, thinking of the blonde downstairs.

"I'm gonna." Cordelia yelled, baring her throat.

Angel ignored her and not looking at that throbbing vein. He continued slamming into her. She came a few more times before he gave into his passion and groaned, almost calling out Buffy's name. He hopped up and grabbed his jeans and cleaned his cock off with his black sweater he had been wearing earlier.

He smirked at Cordelia who was almost asleep on the bed. Gotta admit, she's a good lay! He knew it wasn't fair to her, but she could leave anytime. He knew she wanted him. That she would always cherish the way Buffy found them, writhering against each other in the Bronze.

Angel sighed and stared at his son. As usual, he was still bent up. He patted his son on the back and walked out to the balcony in just a pair of jeans he didn't bother to button up. He ran his hands through his hair and sighed and became lost in his thoughts of the sweet blonde downstairs he had destroyed. But now, she was here and damnit, things were not good. He couldn't count the times he had picked up the phone to call her. How many times he did and hung up. The returned letters, the flowers returned, every gift he had ever given her had been returned and he had simply ended up giving most of them to Cordelia.

Angel lost himself to the memories he once shared with Buffy and ignored the soft snoring of Cordelia in his bed. Not noticing the hazel eyes that were staring in horror into the room.

5.

"Buffy?" Sam asked, noticing her _expression.

"Not.the. bathroom," Buffy muttered, having her own flashbacks of when she found Angel and Cordelia the first time. Her heart broke in so many pieces, she knew they would never come together again. She couldn't believe it, Angel and Cordelia. She had been in so much shock, she had just stood there. She had come to find him to ask him if he would take her back and she had been silly about Faith but she had always wondered if he and Faith had something going on while he was pretending to be Angelus. By the looks of it, he was having fun with Cordelia or maybe both?

When she looked to the future, he had been the only thing she had ever seen. She did the only thing she could thing of when they were done, she clapped. God, she clapped, applauded them. How could she have done that? To this day she will never know where that courage or strength came from, she had wanted to rip into Cordelia and torture Angel, maybe stake him. No. No, she would never stake him, she didn't have that much strength. She had felt her heart being ripped out and all her emotions leave her. She felt cold for the first time and she made sure they left Sunnydale that night. She didn't want them there for the Ascension, didn't want distractions, didn't want them. She didn't give him a chance to explain because hey, there wasn't really a reason for him to explain, what was he going to say, Cordy just happen to fall on his cock?

"Buffy?" Asked the concerned mother to be.

"Tis ok?" Buffy ignored the questions in her eyes. Everyone knew about Cordelia and Angel. Knew that the Slayer had once loved and thought her soul mate was a vampire. Buffy smiled and went off to look for the bathroom for the mommy to be who was having a hard time holding it in.

Buffy frowned remember those days.Abby would have been about a year older than Angel's little boy. Her sweet Abby...

"Found it!" Sam squealed with delight and her face flushed red with embarrassment.

Buffy chuckled. "Sam, I've been there, I understand."

Sam's eyes darkened with sympathy but Buffy ignored it. She didn't need sympathy.

Buffy smiled. "Will you be able to find your way back?" She asked Sam as the other woman ducked into the bathroom.

"Yessss," Sam said.

Buffy chuckled and trailed her finger down the wall as she walked. So Angel lived in a hotel. She expected like a huge house like in Sunnydale but a hotel? She shrugged and sat down on the step of the stairs waiting for Willow and Riley to go over the schematics of the jail. Buffy had this feeling it would be faster to just walk into the jail and snatch her sister Slayer. With it now being night fall when it was supposed to be daylight who knew what was going to happen, but she had a feeling it would happen.

Something besides scary vamp was out there waiting for her. She felt it, something was calling for her. It called her in her dreams and called to her being. It was scary, but the scariest thing of them all was she wanted whatever it was. She was tired, she knew she would never be loved again especially by Angel. She had no one except her friends, but they had their own lives. She hated that she even had to bring them along on this. They should be at home watching movies and forgetting about the evil that was out there.

Angel..he was all around her. She wanted to get lost in his arms or his embrace, but she wasn't his anymore. He had Cordelia, he had made his choice. Her life had sorta went on. Buffy sighed and stared at the ceiling, cringing at the sight she had seen. The moans that were coming from him...from her! No one ever said life was fair. She briefly wondered if anyone would miss either of them if she killed them. She groaned, knowing she really couldn't kill either one of them. Besides, Angel has Connor now and the little boy needed a father, no matter who it was.

Angel as a father? Something she had only seen in her dreams. Hell, she had even dreamed of him holding Abby. Her sweet baby girl. She tried not to think too much of the infant these days. It was too hard.

With an aggravated sigh she walked down the stairs and headed back over to Willow. She ignored the two Watchers with ease as they tried to get her attention. She didn't want to deal with Wesley's shit, no matter how hunky he had gotten. Hunky? Wesley? Good God I need to get laid, she thought.

"Don't touch," Kennedy snapped.

"Please?" Molly asked, grabbing the crossbow.

Buffy stared at them for a second as she made her way across the room. "God give me strength," She whispered.

"So, praying now?" Xander chuckled.

Willow slapped him across the back of the head.

"Shut it Xan," Riley snapped, grinning at the other man.

Buffy sat down on the gaudy couch in the lobby. She briefly wondered who picked it out or was it here all along. She knew Angel had better taste than this. Leather, silk the man loved his sensations. Buffy groaned thinking how much he had loved seeing her in silk or how much she enjoying the sensation of silk sheets Angel had made sure he had. Said they were imported. It had given her an idea of how much money he really did have. He never said anything, but she was sure he was rolling in it.

"Buffy, are you listening?" Riley snapped.

Buffy gave him a sheepish grin, "Sorry."

"As Ri was saying, it's a maximum prison and our latest info on Faith was that she's on lock down again," Willow groaned.

Buffy shrugged," Well then I guess we go with what should have been plan A. Go right in and get her."

"Wait, you cant do that," Fred yelled.

Buffy eyed the brunette. She had already taken a dislike to the woman. One, she worked for Angel meaning she's charging innocents for help and two she was with Angel. Buffy didn't care at all who she was or if she was nice or sweet. Blah, Buffy thought. She eyed her for a second and the brunette backed up into the cute black guy. He was staring at her, sizing her up and he was trying to determine what her weaknesses were.

"Don't bother," She said softly.

The guy blinked and frowned. "I don't know who you are and personally don't care. You will not come in here and interrupt out lives like this. We have everything under control," Gunn sneered sizing her up.

"Charles," Lorne said shaking his head. The green demon walked over to the tiny Slayer. Her friends had flanked behind her, all staring at him as if he was enemy number one.

"Listen honey, I know who you are," Lorne said his eyes twinkling.

Buffy turned around and grabbed the computer and stared at it. Studying the blueprints that were on the computer and ignored the demon. She didn't trust demons and why should she anyway. The only demon she did trust was Spike and sometimes she wondered.

"Such a bitch," Cordelia said yawning as she came down the stairs.

"Wow, Queen C looks like she got totally fucked," Willow commented.

Everyone became extremely quiet. All eyes were on Buffy to see what she was going to do.

"She did," Sam said, pushing the brunette aside and coming down the stairs and giving her husband a kiss on the lips.

"You watched? Kinky, Sam!" Xander shouted turning red when everyone's eyes turned his direction.

Sam gave him a look that said shut up.

"No, she didn't watch," Buffy muttered.

"Let's just say Buffy and I made a wrong turn while looking for the bathroom," Sam said, rubbing her belly.

Buffy already knew Angel was standing on the stairs. She could feel his eyes on her like always. She actually felt like saying something nasty but noticed Willow's eyes on the door. Buffy nodded her head slightly.

"They will be here, they are ok, I promise!. I wouldn't have let them go on their own if I didn't think they would be ok," She said to Willow.

"Ya, besides An is with them," Xander said slightly serious, however his eyes were trained to the door as well.

"More guests?" Cordelia asked with a scowl on her face as she sat down besides Fred.

"Angel, Mr. Giles has been telling me about what's going on," Wesley said.

Angel nodded and walked down the rest of the stairs and placed Connor into a small playpen and kissed the top of his head.

"Sleep, little man," He whispered.

Buffy couldn't help but watch the scene. She felt a lump in her throat and turned away when Angel straightened up.

"Well? How do we defeat the first Evil?" Angel asked, staring holes into Buffy's back.

"I wish I knew," Giles said as the door blew open.

**

6.

"Oh, thank God," Willow let out a sigh of relief as Oz and Tara walked through the door. She ran so fast she nearly knocked poor Anya over as she tried to grab her mates.

"Hey, watch it! I bought food, with my own money!" Anya snapped.

"Sorry Anya," Willow said softly.

"Well next time...Oh," Anya squealed as Xander picked her up. The bags of food nearly toppled, going everywhere.

"I'm so glad you're safe," He whispered into her ear.

"Hey, I know you!" Cordelia said, staring at the girl in Xander's arms.

Anya peeked around Xander's shoulders and stared at the fake blonde. "I remember you, this is all your fault. I'm going to get old because of you," She snapped.

"I love you An," Xander said, kissing her.

"So sweet," Sam said, still rubbing her belly.

Anya looked over at her startled and stared at her stomach. "Damnit Xander, they pro-created first. They get married first and have the baby first. Hell, it was bad enough that Buf..." Xander clamped a hand over her mouth and her eyes widened, "Damnit," She snapped, walking over and setting the food down.

Buffy had let out a small giggle but quickly stopped when she heard Anya almost let out her secret. Only so many people knew about her and Abby and well, Angel wasn't one of them. He didn't need to know. It was honestly, none of his business anymore. He didn't want her, he never did, it was something she was sure of.

She didn't even bother to look at him to see if he caught the secret. She was feeling more tense by the minute with him staring holes in the back of her head. She stared at the food sitting on the table, untouched. It had felt like days since she had anything to eat. "Buffy, you need to eat," Giles said softly, giving her a sympathetic smile. She hated when people did that. She did not need pity!

"I know...I just don't seem to have the energy," She whispered, sitting back down, staring at the computer prints. She knew it was hopeless to stare at the computer, but it was either that or stare at the toddler or God knows she might have to stare at Angel. So computer it is.

"So, how was the wedding? Sorry we couldn't make it. We were in Alaska," Sam said, sitting down next to a fuming Anya.

Willow giggled as she held hands with both Oz and Tara. "You really should have helped her pick out dresses."

"Wait! Wait a minute, you're married?" Cordelia shouted at Xander.

Buffy frowned as her shouting woke up Angel's son. His little cry, breaking the rest of her heart. She could hear Angel pick up the child and her body went tense as he walked closer to her and she could hear him murmuring to his baby boy. God, how many dreams had she had of him murmuring to Abby? How many dreams had she had of her murmuring to Abby. If only...

"Yes, we are married! He's mine!" Anya snapped.

"Honey," Xander warned and turned to Cordelia with a smirk. "Yes, we are married. Going on a year now."

Buffy sneaked a look at Cordelia whose jaw had dropped and she looked shocked for the first time since we had shown up.

"Really, Cordelia. Shut your mouth, the fish look isn't pretty on you," Buffy snarled.

Cordelia smiled and turned her attention on the Slayer. "Why, you bitch. Let me tell you something Miss Thing. You obviously weren't good enough to hold any of the men in this hotel. Look around you! All the men you cared about are with someone else and let me tell you, Angel is good in bed and I'm enough woman for him."

"Cordelia, that's enough!" Angel roared and the Hyperion and it's occupants went silent.

"Well, finally the man has balls," Oz murmured, walking over and sitting down next to Buffy. He grabbed a plate of food and handed it to her. She smiled, knowing it was her favorite, she wasn't going to let Cordelia ruin any more of her life.

"Eat Buffy," Tara whispered, still holding Willow's hands.

"So Willow, you're a whore. Who would have ever thought!" Cordelia snapped.

Buffy stood up before anyone else could, knocking her food off her lap. She stalked towards Cordelia who could see the hatred in the other woman's eyes and she backed up. Buffy grabbed Cordelia's wrist and held it painfully tight and hissed. "You have no right to call anyone else a whore. Go look in the mirror! Look at yourself real hard. What Willow, Tara, and Oz have is real. They have real love. Yes, all three of them are together, but they adore each other. They are soul mates. Tell me Cordelia, what do you have? Nothing, you have nothing! You're a whore, both of you." Buffy yelled, staring at Angel with seething eyes while speaking the last sentence.

Angel hissed from her words and Cordelia let out a yelp of pain and tried to grab Buffy by the hair, but Buffy increased her pressure on the other girl's arm.

"Let her go!" Fred yelled.

Buffy pushed Cordelia till she fell on the floor. She stared at the woman under her and snapped, "You will not say another word about any of us. We do not respect you, because you're nothing but a piece of trash."

"Angel!" Cordelia whined.

Oz growled at the vampire.

"Cordelia, I do believe that's enough," Wesley said softly cleaning his glasses..

"Quite right," Giles said with a grin on his face.

Buffy turned around and walked back to her table. She sighed softly, realizing her dinner was gone. Just as well, she probably wouldn't have eaten it anyway.

"Buffy?" Giles asked softly.

Buffy nodded. "Its time. Ri, Gunn and Willow come with me, the rest of you stay here," She said, staring at everyone but Angel.

"I'm going with you," Angel said.

"No...no, you're not," Buffy grounded out, pointing her finger at the baby in his arms.

"I'm not going with you!" Gunn yelled.

Buffy just stared at him. "I don't like you. You obviously have no morals for charging innocent people for help. If you die, I wouldn't bother attending your funeral. Stay here if you wish and don't help," She snapped and headed for the door.

She stood at the door waiting for Riley to kiss his wife, and for Willow to kiss both Oz and Tara. It really was a sight. For a moment, she realized she had no one, but that was a good thing, right? She didn't want any of them to come, actually. She didn't want any of them to get hurt. She knew they wouldn't all get out of this big battle unscarred. It's not like she didn't have enough scars on her as it was.

"Buffy, I'm coming," Angel said softly.

Buffy finally looked him in the eyes. Trying her best to hide her pain. "I can't trust you." She turned and walked out the door. Willow nodded to Tara as she walked out and Buffy felt the energy flow out of them.

"No one will harm any of you," Buffy whispered as she walked out to her SUV. Knowing the barrier would keep out demons and keep those in side safe.

Willow jogged over to her and hugged her. "Buffy.."

"It's ok. We...I ...can deal. It's ok," Buffy said taking a deep breath. Then, she hopped into the jeep and headed towards the jail. With fire still coming down, this was going to be one hell of a trip. We get this over with, we can go back home, she thought. She was tired and emotionally drained and had a feeling it was going to get worse. As she dodged fire raining from the Heavens, she could remember the times when she was so tired and Angel would make her feel better by simply holding her or rubbing out the stiff, sore muscles in her neck. Now, no one did those things. Sometimes, she wondered how she stood. She was exhausted and the demon world knew it. It was only a matter of time until the end came to meet her. Sometimes, she hoped for it. She was tired.

**

7.

Angel stared at the blonde heading out the door. He was dumbfounded. He knew she pretty much hated him, but he had never heard the words before. "I can't trust you" will be buried in his head and heart forever.

"Pick your jaw up Dead Boy," Xander smirked.

Angel blinked and turned around to stare at the occupants of the hotel who were currently staring at him. Some with worried expressions and some with amusement. Angel shook his head and stared at the top of his son's head. He was not going to let her break out Faith on her own. That Soldier boy wasn't going to be any use to her. He needed to help her. He stalked over to Cordelia who was staring at him intently, and he handed Connor over to her. He picked up a sword and headed to the door.

"Do..don't!" Tara shouted.

Angel didn't bother to look at the stuttering witch and he headed out the door determined. He landed on his ass as he hit the barrier with full force.

"What the hell!" Gunn shouted, almost smiling at seeing Angel lying on his ass.

"Told you," Tara muttered.

"It's a protection spell. A barrier," Anya said with a grin, digging into her dinner.

"Why?" Wesley asked.

"Because she knew I would come after her," Angel whispered.

Giles snorted, "Spike is right, you are a ninny. The barrier is to protect us. No one can get in. She wanted to protect us."

"No more deaths,," Oz muttered, rubbing Tara's shoulders.

"I don't think I could stand another death either," Anya whispered.

"Its ok honey," Xander whispered to his wife.

Angel just stared at the group. Deaths? What? This was not the same group Cordelia and himself had walked away from years ago. They were powerful, more powerful than anything he had witnessed in awhile. He stared at the blonde with Oz. She was powerful and she was holding the barrier up. He could see her whispering under her breath and with the power coming from Oz, he knew they all shared a special bond. Angel was pretty sure Willow had added her own part in the spell as they walked outside.

He picked himself up as he heard Connor start to whimper. The little boy was trying to wiggle out of Cordelia's arms. Truly, Cordelia was not the motherly type. Who would actually believe that she was a mother? He dropped the sword with a clang and walked over and took his son from her arms and went to sit down beside the pregnant woman, what was her name? He couldn't remember. He just knew she was married to Riley. He frowned at that, he had assumed that Buffy and Riley were together. They had been together when they had come to get Faith a few years ago. They had seemed like lovers, overly friendly and he could smell Riley all over her. Buffy had ignored Angel through the entire time. Even when Kate had handcuffed him. Buffy hadn't said a word. Angel remembered feeling the pain at the sight of her holding his hand. The moron had actually checked her wound. Buffy had been grazed by one of the bullets flying from the Watcher's guns.

He can remember clearly Buffy saying she had someone else now and Riley had wrapped his arms around her, given him a nasty look and walked away. Maybe they weren't together now?

"You should have gone with her," Angel said. He looked straight at Gunn and frowned. "Why didn't you?"

Gunn opened his mouth and snapped it shut.

"Because she's evil," hissed Fred.

Oz started laughing. Angel mused slightly that he had never heard Oz laugh before.

"That's bloody priceless," Giles said taking off his glasses.

"That's right, she's evil! Always has been and always will be. She's a freak," Cordelia snapped.

Angel growled, which startled his son and he instantly quieted. Connor was starting to scream more and more these days and it was giving him a migraine.

"Listen here you twit. That woman has saved your life more than she ever had too," Giles snapped at Cordelia.

"I.." She stuttered.

"She has done nothing for you to speak about her like that. She is the Chosen One. She is the Champion. She has suffered more than any of you know and you will not speak of her as if she is lower than dirt," Giles snarled and turned his attention on Angel. Angel knew damn well that this was Ripper, not Giles. "You will not hurt her, do you understand?" He spit out.

"I don't plan on it," Angel muttered.

"She used to think that you were the sunshine in her dark world and then you fucked up boy," Ripper yelled his face turning red.

"Mr. Giles.." Wesley tried.

Ripper walked to Angel and snarled, not caring if he upset the child or not. Angel held his son's head down and stared at Ripper with unwavering eyes. Ripper's eyes narrowed into tiny slits. "She trusted you once. She made you into something you're not. She made you into a hero. Someone that we could trust. She saved your life, do you remember that Angelus?" Ripper snarled.

Angel narrowed his own eyes and they flickered with gold. "Back off Giles," he snarled.

Ripper laughed. "She had high hopes for you. She had high hopes for herself back then too. But then you decided to fuck that thing over there," Giles yelled, pointing at Cordelia who looked like she had gone into shock.

"What you did was lose any spirit she had left, she went on like a zombie, and saved the world that revolved around her, while all the time living in the shadows, thinking she wasn't enough. She only knows death, she has lost so many people throughout her short life and she won't be alive much longer, the way things are going. She is our only hope at the moment. We will be out of your home as soon as we grab Faith," Ripper said softly.

"So she's not a freak?" Fred squeaked out.

Anya rolled her eyes. "Honey, I'm more of a freak than she is. Well, hell, so is Xander! Sure, he's just normal, no super powers or anything but uhhh," She sighed with a dreamy smile.

Angel stared perplexed as Anya stared at Xander and she grabbed his hand.

"Um, ya..we .umm bathroom?" Xander squeaked out.

Cordelia let out a squeak of disgust as the couple ran off giggling.

"It's all they think about," Molly whispered.

Angel's attention shifted to the two Slayer's in Training. They had been very quiet during this ordeal.

Kennedy giggled and blushed. "Must be nice to be in love. She mentioned she wanted to have a baby. So maybe that's what they are trying for."

"I heard Buffy got ."

"I think you two should start training," Giles interrupted the two girls from their conversation and Angel just stared at them.

"Angel, why don't you train the two girls. Buffy was planning on Spike helping her train but you will do at the moment," Giles said.

"I agree with Angel helping, but Spike? This is the same William the Bloody that tortures people?" Wesley muttered.

"For some reason Buffy wants him around and he.well he seems good for her," Giles muttered looking slightly sick.

"You don't agree?" Wesley asked.

"Well no, but yes, well bloody hell, it's complicated and he helped her in some tough spots. He's living with her.."

"WHAT!" Angel yelled.

Cordelia started laughing.

"Right. Girls, now is not the time to train with Angel," Wesley said looking pale.

"Fine with me, ya got a telly?" Molly asked.

Giles sat down beside Sam.

"Don't worry Mr. Giles, Riley will take good care of her. Or she will take care of him, one of the two," Sam said, rubbing her belly.

"I know..I know," He whispered.

Angel had startled Connor so much, the kid was screaming his head off. He placed him in his playpen and threw some toys in that made a ton of noise.

"Want a drink boss?" Lorne asked. Holding two martinis.

Angel growled.

"Just thought you would need it pumpkin. Honestly you big bear, now I understand why you're so broody all the time. She's beautiful. Still don't know why you did what you did," Lorne muttered, walking over to Fred and handing her the drink instead.

"Drink Fredakins," Lorne said in a motherly voice.

"Charles, you should really be nice to the Slayer, she can kick your ass! Haven't you learned not to believe Cordelia yet?" Lorne shushed, walking up the stairs.

"Hey!" Cordelia snapped.

Oz chuckled.

Angel just stormed downstairs to the training room. He headed for the punching bag in the middle and started pounding. He shed his shirt and started kicking the bag.

"I know a better way to blow off steam," Cordelia said sulky.

"Go away," He growled. He hadn't even realized she was in the same room. He didn't hold a bond with her, so why bother.

"Angel," She said in a whiney voice.

Angel turned to her in game face. Cordelia blanched. "Baby, go back to your beautiful face," she whispered.

"This is me Cordelia, you knew that all along," Angel growled.

"I know but." She whimpered as he grabbed her upper arm.

"Go!" He shouted. He was losing his control.

"Fine, you can be an ass and sulk down here. They don't want you!" She snapped. "You know where I'll be if you want me!"

Angel sighed and started doing Tai Chi, something he had learned long ago as Angelus. He moved slowly through the routine thinking of nothing but a certain blonde kept popping in his head. He had shown her how to do this years ago and he briefly wondered if she still did it. Does she do it with Spike? Are her and Spike more than friends? Spike friends with anyone is ridiculous he had to have other motives. He she smelled like heaven. He inhaled, knowing he didn't need it but it seemed calming. He could still smell her and he set his jaw. He was going to win her back.

**

8.

Two hours, fifty six minutes, and thirty seconds had gone by and Buffy sat in the back of her SUV trembling. Things never go as they plan. And why should they? It was the story of her life. Nothing...Nothing....Nothing ever went right! Buffy Summers didn't have luck, it was skill. Nothing was ever easy anymore and she was sure that someone was playing a game with her life. Whispering thoughts into her head about hate and making her angry. Maybe it was the first but honestly she didn't care anymore. She tried not to feel anymore. It was easier that way. If she didn't feel, it doesn't hurt. What a laugh, it obviously doesn't work like it's supposed too.

Sure, she had the great idea of busting her way into the jail and snatching Faith from her cell she had been caged in for so many years. A Slayer shouldn't be caged up, it wasn't right. Sometimes she thought that they were part animals. Out for the hunt, but the idea of being caged! It sickened her, but Faith had killed and killed and taken her body and killed her but killed humans and not the undead.

It's not that she had feelings for her sister Slayer....well technically that's not true. She had a connection that she had never had with someone. They shared the same blood. Buffy sometimes wondered if they tasted the same...wondered if Angel had tasted Faith? Sure she knew about Vampires and sex and knew they enjoyed blood play but their first time, Angel wouldn't with her, but she knew he would have eventually and she was positive that Faith and Angel had become fuck buddies before Cordelia. Even though he never actually admitted it ,but as soon as she saw Cordelia and Angel she knew. She knew he had fucked Faith! And honestly, why not? Faith had flaunted it and had always wanted him and Buffy was sure he had been slightly interested in her. However, she knew he probably only did it because she wouldn't give into him, but then again it's not she wanted to see Angelus. But at the moment maybe Angelus would be better than Angel.

Okay, so maybe not Angelus but she wanted someone she could trust and she had been hoping Faith would help her. The brunette had sent a letter a few months after being jailed asking for forgiveness but Buffy hadn't bothered to e-mail since she was having problems of her own...Abby.

Sweet, sweet Abby, but she wasn't going to go there. It wasn't just the blood that made the connection with Faith, it was the fact she wasn't alone in this huge evil nasty world. Sure, she had her friends but they never truly understood her. But Faith....but Faith did. She got it. She got the fact that they were special.

But Buffy hated her. Faith took everything that was good about a Slayer and turned it around. Sure, she had been tempted more than once to head for the darkness. Hell, just being around her friends made her want to rip their heads off with their petty arguments. She loved them, she truly did, but they don't understand the line she follows and every so often she wobbles and not a single one of them will be able to catch her when she crosses.

Honestly, she didn't want to be out trying to get rid of the big bad. She was pretty sure she was the cause of the whole mess since the First seemed to not want to harm her. Not that Giles has to say anything, but it's the looks he gives her when she's not looking. She knew....how could she not? She has been living this wonderful crappy ass life for over seven years now and she knew how to pick up on vibes. It wasn't something Giles taught her, it was something she picked up. Like it was hard with people who were constantly asking the world of you.

Breaking Faith out wasn't supposed to be this easy. Of course, in the middle of the day there was supposed to be the sun.

She shrugged and winced, "Damnit," she muttered.

Buffy and Riley had walked straight into the prison with Willow staying in the vehicle. There was no reason for her to get hurt. Buffy was pretty sure neither Oz or Tara would forgive her. Kind of funny if you think about it. If one of her friends happened to die, all the blame would most likely get placed on her shoulders. Or perhaps she would just blame herself. Does it matter? Anyway, Willow stayed in the SUV and chanted a small protection spell on them as they walked into the prison. No one noticed them. The place was destroyed, prisoners and guards lying in bloody puddles.

After taking small steps into the prison and noticing the mess, she took off in sprint, following Riley's directions. Kind of nice to have someone who can, not only read a map, but memorize one as well. Guess it was all the work Maggie placed in him.

Buffy hissed thinking about the wacko scientist.

"Buffy?" Riley asked in a strained voice, driving her SUV and dodging fire balls from the sky.

Buffy placed her hand on the window and thought how beautiful they were. So very, very, pretty. She closed her eyes and let the tears leak out.

"Buffy!" Shouted Willow.

"Ok," Buffy croaked out.

They had raced to Faith's cell, only to find the door open and the brunette Slayer lying on her cot staring at the ceiling. Blood trickling from her lips, more stab wounds than a person should ever have to deal with.

Faith was dead and now she was alone, wasn't she? She was pretty sure that neither Molly or Kennedy had been called. She was now alone and had to save the world that way, but the question she kept thinking about was.......does she want to?

She closed her eyes and could hear Riley and Willow yelling her name. She felt her hand go limp from the window and blackness overwhelmed her.

**

9.

Giles slowly walked back down the stairs, his eyes never leaving the body on the floor.

"Xander," Giles said tensely.

Xander nodded but never took his eyes off of Faith's body either. In fact, none of the people in the room who knew the girl could take their eyes off the fallen Slayer.

"We need to...to," Wesley croaked, placing a hand over his mouth and turned away.

"Yes," Giles said sadly.

"We need to what? What? What?! Huh, what do we need to do? I'm thinking running is a good plan right about now! We got one dead slayer, one hurt, and a daddy vampire....." Xander huffed and turned to Giles, "Which by the way, don't you owe Buffy money on the whole vampires can't have kids?" he snapped, his face becoming red.

"Xander," Anya whispered, placing a hand on his shoulder.

Xander shrugged it off, "No time for sex! Time to run!" He shouted.

"Xander, do calm yourself," Giles said, stepping over Molly's still form on the ground.

"Should we...ya know...." Fred pointed to the two girls who had recently passed out.

"Those are supposed to be Slayers?" Gunn asked shaking his head.

"They are just children, but no they are not the Slayer. Buffy had a feeling, I should have listened...Wesley we need to," he pointed to Faith.

"No, need to run!" Xander said sitting down against the wall.

"Honey," Anya whispered.

"Fred, I need you to go downstairs and there should be some gas," Wesley said softly.

"Huh?" Fred whispered.

"Gasoline," Wesley snapped.

Fred jumped. "I'm sorry Fred, I ... please, just go get the gasoline," He whispered closing his eyes.

"We need wood and Holy Water, and a..a...cloth," Giles said softly.

"You're going to set her ablaze, aren't you?" Anya whispered.

Giles nodded.

"I'm sorry who? Ablaze as in fire who..what? God Damn it, just give me one of Buffy's valiums!" Xander snapped.

"Please do," Giles snapped.

"You know about the ritual?" Wesley asked Anya.

"I've seen it. Being around as long as I have, I've seen a lot. I was only surprised when you didn't...well when you didn't use the ritual on Buffy after she....passed away," she stated, her eyes glazing over.

Wesley nodded, never taking his eyes off the woman in front of him. She married Harris?

Giles looked away.

"You couldn’t..." Wesley whispered.

"Ok, Still not getting this!" Xander snapped.

"I'm with ya," Gunn said shaking his head.

"Got the gas," Fred muttered walking back up the stairs. Gunn ran over to help her with the canteens.

"Are you stupid? He's going to burn her," Cordelia said, her eyes never leaving Faith's body. Her face was pale with tears streaking down the sides but she ignored them.

"Burn?" Xander swallowed staring up at Cordelia who for once, looked like she cared about something.

"What a catch you got," Cordelia sneered to Anya.

"You're just jealous, he's excellent in bed," Anya snapped.

"Alright. Ignoring that last part like I typically do, let's get to work," Giles said tensely.

"Right," Wesley whispered.

"Right and about those valiums?" Xander whispered.

"Can I have one?" Fred moaned looking pretty sick.

"Why does Buffy need Valiums?" Cordelia snidely questioned with a smile.

Connor started to wake up from his nap and began to scream when he didn't see his daddy in the room. It wasn't Cordelia who went over and picked up the child, but Fred and she soothed the sobbing child with comforting words.

"Shouldn't you take care of him?" Anya asked suspiciously to Cordelia.

"What for?" Cordelia said absently.

"Hmm" Anya whispered to herself and shook her head.

Giles looked right over Cordelia as if he didn't even see her. "Someone wake these two up and get them somewhere safe," he demanded.

"On it," Riley said walking down the stairs with Sam.

"How is she?" Giles asked.

"Just a graze to the shoulder. Riley patched her up and she's sleeping now. I was able to give her a shot of Demerol, so she maybe out for a little bit. However, knowing Buffy, she won't be," Sam said shaking her head and rubbing her belly.

Giles looked at Sam sadly, remembering his own Slayer with her belly just starting to swell. Life truly isn't fair and he sometimes believed that the Powers were playing games with his Slayer. Staring at the people in the room, he truly believed that they were all apart of something. Everyone playing his or her own part.

"Demerol?" Gunn asked.

"Why, you don't keep meds around for pain?" Oz growled.

"Ya, like Tylenol and Aspirin!" Cordelia snapped.

"Giles!" Riley snapped.

"What?" He said snapping his head up.

"I've been speaking to you for a few minutes now. The girls are awake." Riley pointed to the two girls Cordelia and Fred were ushering up the stairs.

"Good," He nodded and turned to Wesley who had turned pale, reminding him of the Wesley he had first met. Wesley nodded.

"It's time," Wesley croaked and squared his shoulder.

"Time? Can't we just dig a grave?" Xander moaned.

"No, we don't want her brought back," Giles snapped.

"Huh?" Xander said confused.

"Alexander, stop playing stupid, boy. We don't need anyone or anything bringing her back from the dead. A Slayer used for the wrong purpose as we all know could be..." Giles sighed.

"Oh, you mean like the lawyers did with Darla?" Fred whispered.

"Winifred!" Wesley snapped.

"Darla?" Willow questioned with narrowed eyes.

"Ok, let's get this done," Wesley said avoiding Willow's stare and rubbing his temple.

**

10.

Buffy was dreaming. She was dressed in silk from head to toe. Her favorite color green that matched her eyes. It was so light, but when the dress she was wearing moved, it shimmered and became darker. She was barefoot with a tiny toe ring. She frowned, staring at the design trying to make it out. It almost looked like the Claudagh ring Angel had given her for her birthday a few years ago.

She pointed her toe and took an elegant step. Music came to mind and she closed her eyes and began to sing,

"Save me from the nothing I’ve become
Frozen inside, without your touch, without your love darling
only you are the life among the dead

All this time I can't believe I couldn't see
kept in the dark but you were there in front of me
I’ve been sleeping a thousand years it seems
got to open my eyes to everything

without a thought without a voice without a soul
don't let me die here
there must be something more
bring me to life"

The words came easily and she felt like she was floating on air. All she wanted was for her cares to just fly away and she would never have to worry anymore. She twirled and felt the silk caress her body like a glove. She ran her hands up to her hair and smiled. He liked it like that, up and out of the way, a perfect invitation for a kiss.

She was flying until she heard it, so soft at first. She twirled to the music in her head

And then she smelt it....

"What a way to go, huh B," Faith's voice flittered through her head.

Buffy stopped twirling around, her world becoming smaller. She felt wet and looked down noticing her clothes had changed and she was drenched with blood.

"Five by Five, sister," Faith whispered.

"Go away," Buffy whispered, closing her eyes trying to bring the music back. She didn’t want to wake up.

"Get up Buffy....NOW!" Faith's voice screamed.

Buffy opened her eyes and brushed away the tears that were falling with her good arm. She pushed herself up off the bed and walked to the balcony. She ignored that this was probably Angel's room and she had just gotten up from his bed that he had fucked Cordelia on. Buffy opened the glass doors and stepped outside to where the smell was getting stronger. She watched as Giles continued to pour gasoline around what she knew was Faith's body wrapped up. She knew about the ritual but no one would ever get the use of Faith's body.......ever.

She watched Wesley fumble with a lighter and hand it over to Giles. The younger Watcher backing up and looking slightly green. This wasn't right, she thought. They shouldn't be....

"Stop," She yelled out.

Both Watchers looked up towards her.

She held her hand up as a sign for them to hold on and she grabbed her jacket that she had on earlier and sighed, noticing it was torn to shreds and threw it back on the bed. She didn't take the time to clean herself up, she didn't care about the blood.

She walked out the bedroom door and noticed Angel coming out of the next room. Must be Connor's room she thought briefly. She walked right by him without saying a word.

"Buffy..." He whispered.

She kept walking. She knew if she stopped she would never get this done. She walked past her friends, who looked at her with horror.

"Buffy, no!" Willow whispered.

"What's she doing?" Gunn asked suspiciously.

Buffy walked out the back door and shut the door silently. She grabbed the lighter from Giles and heard the two men step back. She walked up slowly to the body, ignoring the smell of the gasoline drifting through her nose and shook off the dizzy feeling that dwarfed her body.

"I'm so sorry Faith. We never gave each other a chance. Or maybe we did. You and I, were the complete opposites, ya know," she whispered softly blinking her eyes.

The tear drifted down and Buffy wondered briefly how she had anymore tears left to shed. "I failed you, like I failed everyone. I should have gotten to you first but I...I was so into my own problems and trying to save all the girls that might be or would have been ....well us and I forgot about my sister. I'm sorry," Buffy whispered.

She sniffled and held back the sob that threatened to tear from her chest. She lit the body and watched it go up in flames.

"Save me from the nothing I’ve become," She chocked out the words. Wondering why she was singing them.

She sat on the bench and watched her sister Slayer become ashes.

**

Lorne stood at the corner of the building, staring at the young blonde with tears in his eyes. How can one person have so much pain.

"So young," He whispered.

"You read something?" Angel asked, staring at the fire.

Lorne turned to the vampire. "Pain," he whispered and looked back at the blonde who was staring at the fire.

"So much pain," Lorne whispered grabbing his head. The images flashing around in his head were too much for him. He moaned and closed his eyes tight, wanting to block out the horror he had just seen. No one should have to go through life like this.

"Lorne!" Angel whispered grabbing his friend.

"I....damn, Angelcakes," Lorne said backing up. "I'm going for a drink. The World is going to go to Hell if that cupcake over there goes down in her emotions. Her soul...," Lorne said, walking away leaving a more confused Angel. **

TBC...

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