by Jill
Disclaimer: let me check ... nope, still don't own them. Sigh! I'm not making any money off this. I've taken several lines from the Buffy-season-six-episode "Wrecked". The episode was written by Marti Noxon (gee, it gives you a warm, cosy feeling reading her name as an author, doesn't it? ... although the episode actually wasn't bad. I really like the part "One vampire made me hot. You're just convenient." That made my day.)
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: B/A (strong in this part!), and the usual pairings from the show
Distribution: my site (http://www.never-ending-love.de), Land of Denial, if you have any of my stories, take it; anybody else tell me where it goesTimeline: This is set into canon, in an attempt to make the whole series more B/A-friendly.
Spoilers: the whole B/A-canon to be sure, follows loosely "Midnight Angel","Midnight Whispers", "Midnight Rainbow", "Midnight Hour", "Midnight Memory", "Midnight Protector", "Midnight Letter", "Midnight Encounters", "Midnight Eyes, "Midnight Lovers", "Midnight Kiss", "Midnight Song", "Midnight Rose", "Midnight Velvet", "Midnight Sun", "Midnight Shade", "Midnight Secrets", "Midnight Star", "Midnight Dance", "Midnight Wind", "Midnight Storm", and "Midnight Fire". You should probably read it to understand this. And you should have seen season 6/3 or at least read the transcripts (http://www.psyche.kn-bremen.de), or you won't know what they're talking about.
Timeline: This story will replace the BtVS-season-six-episode "Wrecked". Because of the events I've changed in Smashed, I have to do it. I will probably use several lines from that episode. Please read the author's notes for more explanations.
Feedback: oh yes, please
Dedication: this goes to Mariah! I'm just re-reading "A Glimpse of His Face", and I love it even more than the first time.
Author's Note: Okay, again I'm going to do a time-jump in this part. Part of it will be at the beginning of "Wrecked", then during "Wrecked" and the rest will be after the episode. I'm sure you're going to figure it out. The whole Willow/Dawn thing happens ... for the rest ... read the story.
Author's Note 2: This chapter deals with this from my imagination. Unfortunately we won't see them on screen. I'm trying to connect the shows for my universe.
*****
Covered by a blanket Angel hurried after Buffy towards the Summers' house, releasing a breath of relief when he closed the door behind them. Moving in sunlight under a protection wasn't one of his favourite pastimes.
"Hi."
Pulling the blanket off, his eyes fell on Tara. While Buffy just limped towards the kitchen, Angel greeted the blond witch. "Hi, Tara. Nice to see you."
"Y-yes, nice to see you," she smiled at him a bit uncertain. "I - I was just leaving. Bye." With this she slipped from the house leaving the vampire frowning after her. Something wasn't right. Hadn't Buffy said something about problems between Tara and Willow? He couldn't remember, he'd been too busy dealing with Buffy and her problems. Sighing slightly, he followed the Slayer into the kitchen, only to find her there together with Willow and Dawn, and another woman he thought he'd seen before.
"Figured," Dawn said. "I knew that's why you didn't call." Noticing Angel in the doorway, she beamed at him, "Hi, Angel. So what's the big bad? Uh ... should we be worried?"
"No," Buffy replied quickly, "I think you guys are safe." Turning to Willow she asked, "Tara was here?"
The redhead frowned, "I guess she stayed over with Dawn."
"You guess?," the blond raised a brow, "Where were you?"
Willow pointed at Amy, "We went out, kinda lost track of time."
"Oh," Buffy looked at Angel, motioned for him to sit down next to her. "Angel came last night. We ... uh ... kinda lost track of time, too."
"Uh-huh," Dawn grinned knowingly. "So you didn't exactly fight the whole night."
Her sister rolled her eyes, but didn't comment it, "Want anything?," she asked her lover. "There should be some blood in the fridge ... Spike ...," her voice faltered momentarily, then she recovered, taking a deep breath. "He used to store some stuff over here."
"No," Angel shook his head, then nodded at Willow and Amy as a matter of greeting. "I'm fine. Hi, I'm Angel," he said, introducing himself to the strange woman.
"Hi. Amy. I was a rat."
"Huh?"
Buffy chuckled, "Amy was changed into a rat some ... years ago. Willow found a way to change her back."
"I see," Angel nodded again.
"Buffy, I never would have stayed out all night if I knew you weren't coming home," Willow tried to assure her friend.
"No, o-of course, I mean, you know, it wasn't ... intentional," her eyes darted to Angel, then back to Willow, "And, you know, everyone's safe. You are, right? You're okay?"
Suddenly Angel frowned, "Where's you're first aid supply?"
Buffy's head snapped around, "In the bathroom ... but ... Angel," she called when he walked out of the kitchen. "It's not necessary. It's gonna heal."
Willow raised a brow, then grinned, "Some night."
The Slayer let out a long breath, combing a hand through her hair, "Yeah. Some night," she agreed.
*
Spike woke slowly, and painfully. Of course he would never admit it in public, but his grand-sire had beaten him up good last night. He hurt at places he didn't even know existed on his body. The combined beatings of Slayer and vampire had taken their toll.
Rolling his head on his shoulders, he sat up, groaning when his muscles protested. Reaching out he pulled his cigarettes from his coat and lit one, inhaling the smoke. Hell, he'd been so close last night. She'd responded to him, *she* had started kissing him, and it had felt so good. But then of course Angel had to show up.
Darn him. Spike had never liked Angelus. He'd despised Angel. But now, for the first time, he really hated him. If it wasn't for Angel, Buffy would be his. The Slayer was weak. She was fragile. She was alone. It made her the perfect victim. And he'd played his cards right. But he'd made a fault. He'd forgotten about Angel. He wouldn't make that fault again.
*
"Ow."
"I'm sorry," Angel apologized instantly, regretting the pain he'd caused her.
"No," she sighed, put a hand on his cheek, so he had to look at her. "It's not your fault. The stuff stings," she pointed at the disinfectant the vampire held in his hand. "I don't really need it. I'm going to heal."
"I know," he sighed, too, closed the bottle, placed it on her nightstand. Looking at her, he reached out, covered her hand with his, "Buffy we need to talk about last night."
Instantly averting her eyes, she swallowed hard, "I ... "
"No," he squeezed her hand, "That's not what I mean. We talked about it. I don't ... I'm not angry." He smiled when she gazed at him through tearful eyes. "I promise. I'm not. But you told me that Spike hit you. And even if you wouldn't have told me, you have the evidence all over your body. How was it possible?"
Directing her gaze at her lap, Buffy shook her head, "I don't know," she mumbled. "He said I came back wrong. That his chip was working, but ..." she looked up, a single tear running down her cheek, her eyes full of confusion, "He said it was my fault."
"That's nonsense," Angel insisted, pulling her to him, "You are Buffy. There's nothing wrong with you. I can't sense anything. You're human. Definitely human. I can hear your heartbeat, and I can hear its heartbeat," he placed a hand on her belly. "You're both fine. Could Spike have done anything with the chip?"
"I asked him," she told him, "and he said he hadn't."
He raised a brow, looked at her doubtfully, "And you believe him."
She shrugged, "Not really. Who knows when he's telling the truth, and when not." She shook her head, "I still can't understand what happened. Why did I-"
"Shhh," he put a finger over her lips. "Don't. You were feeling lost. And partly it was my fault. I know I handled Darla and the baby wrong. I-"
"No," she shook her head, "I was being a jealous bitch." She gave him a smile, "I can hardly wait to see the baby."
In response he kissed her.
*
"There she is," Buffy shouted, looking over her shoulder at Angel who was following her. "Dawn!" While she crouched down beside her sister, Angel tackled the demon.
Angel ducked a couple of swings, then punched the demon. Grunting because the demon punched him back, Angel changed into his game-face, kicking his opponent in his stomach, making him fly backward into a wall. The demon got up, advanced Angel again, when he suddenly started to tremble, then screamed and steamed, finally dissolved into a shower of sparks and smoke. The vampire's eyes widened, "Willow," he whispered, seeing her standing, the magick crackling around her fingers.
"What happened?," he heard Buffy ask. "Are you okay?" Turning away from the witch, Angel saw Dawn sitting on the ground holding one arm, pain visible on her features. "Uh ... he was after Willow," she said, crying, "She made the car drive ... don't," she pulled back from Buffy who tried to look at the injured arm. "No, don't."
"I need to see," her sister said gently, stroking the girl's hair, "Let me see your arm."
"Dawn? Oh god, there's blood," Willow cried, rushing towards the others.
"Okay," Buffy stood, looking at Angel, "We need to get her a doctor."
He nodded, turned away towards his car, when Willow spoke again, "Is she okay? Is she okay?"
The Slayer whirled around, "Back off," she ordered her friend. "I got her."
She nodded at Angel and started walking away with him and her sister.
"No, Dawnie," Willow cried again.
"I mean it," Buffy warned, looking over her shoulder, "Stay away from her."
"Dawnie. Dawnie, I'm so sorry." Willow cried even harder, when she saw the girl glaring at her, "I'm so sorry, it was an accident! I didn't see, I'm so, so sorry."
Dawn continued glaring at her, then suddenly slapped her.
"Oh God," the redhead was shocked, "Dawnie! Dawnie, don't.... Please, Dawnie, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry..." She fell to the ground, started to cry hysterically.
Sighing, Buffy exchanged a look with Angel. He nodded slightly, and after giving him a quick grateful smile, she walked back to her friend. "Get up," she ordered harshly.
"I screwed it up, everything, Tara...," Willow couldn't stop crying.
Pulling the witch to her feet, Buffy glared at her, "Yeah, you know what, you did screw up, okay? You could have killed her! You almost did!"
"I know! I know! I can't stop," Willow sobbed, "Buffy! I tried, and I can't."
"You can." The slayer gave her a hard look.
"No," the redhead shook her head, hysteria returning, "I can't! I can't! I ju ... god, I need help. Please! Please help me, please." She wrapped her arms around her friend, cried harder again. "Please," she sobbed.
Slowly lifting her arm, Buffy hugged her back.
*
Two days later
Spike crossed his arms in front of his chest, leaned against the doorframe, smiling at Dawn who was opening, "Hi, Nibblet. How you doin'?"
"Hi, Spike," she beamed at him. "Come in," she invited, stepping back.
Pushing himself off of the doorframe, he sauntered inside after her. "You on your own?," he asked, looking around for any trace of Buffy, frowning when he didn't see her. Not even felt her.
"Yeah, kind of," Dawn replied, walking towards the kitchen. "It's getting empty with Giles back in England. Tara's moved out, too." Suddenly she grinned, "But hey, Amy's back. Did you ever meet Amy? Of course you did, she was the rat. Willow's rat. But she's human again. Willow did a spell ...," she paused, frowned, then shook her head, "Can you give me the pot from up there?," she asked, nodding at her cast. "I'm a bit ... disabled."
"Sure," he gave her the pot, then sat down on a stool at the isle. "So ... uh ... Willow did a spell, and Amy was back." "Yeah," Dawn beamed again, filling milk into the pot. "You want some cocoa?" Not waiting for the answer, she continued to babble, "Anyway. Amy's a witch, too. But Willow ... uh ... she says she isn't doing magic anymore. I was angry with her. She's kinda responsible I got this," again she nodded at her cast. "But it's cool. I mean, everyone keeps asking me how I got it. And they write on it." She came over, holding it in front of Spike's nose. "You wanna write on it too?"
He nodded at the stove, "Your milk's ready."
"Huh? Oh, shi ... I mean, bad," she hurried towards the stove, saving the milk the last possible moment. "So want some cocoa?"
"Yeah," he replied, painting patterns on the surface with his fingers, "Where's the big sis?," he asked casually. "Thought I'd pick her up for some night slaying. Now that Angel's -"
"Gone."
"Yeah, I know Angel's gone. His car is missing. But Buffy-"
"Is gone, too."
Spike's head came up with an almost audible snap, "What do you mean, gone too? Gone, where?"
Dawn shrugged, pouring the milk into two cups, which was difficult with only one hand, "To L.A. With Angel." She rolled her eyes, "They are *so* over each other. It's disgusting. I could hardly sleep the last two nights. With all the moaning and groaning going on in the next room."
Taking the cup from her with a fake smile, Spike was hardly able to contain the anger he felt boiling in him. Gone to L.A. Did the bitch really think she could escape him that way. But no, that was Angel's doing he was sure. Damn him. Damn him. Why had they let him out of Hell? Why couldn't he have stayed down there? And why for god's sake hadn't he killed Angel when he'd had the chance.
Spike sipped from his cocoa, again smiling at Dawn who was watching him closely. So Angel had taken her away. Well, she couldn't stay away forever. And when she came back, he would be here. Waiting. It wasn't as if was getting any older.
*****
"We're back," Angel announced when he and Buffy stepped through the entrance of the Hyperion, her hand tightly in his. "Hey, where's everybody?"
"Hi, Angel." Fred came rushing down the stairs, smiling brightly. "Hi, I'm Fred," she greeted Buffy, reaching out her hand. "I think we were never properly introduced."
The Slayer smiled tentatively, "Hi. I'm Buffy. I'm with Angel," she added purposely.
Fred was a bit flustered, "Oh. I know. I ... uh ... I know," she stated, giving Buffy a nod. "I'm just a friend. Angel saved me from another dimension. And now he lets me stay here."
"Saved you, huh?," Buffy looked at her boyfriend, her features and voice softening, "He's doing that a lot."
He smiled, kissed her quickly, gently. "It happens."
"Ah, Angel, you're back," Wesley smiled, coming from his office. His smile widened when he saw Buffy. "Buffy. What a wonderful surprise. I'm glad you're here. After the last time ... well, we were afraid ..."
"Yes. Wes," the vampire cut in. "We already know that."
"Yes. Yes. Of course," the former watcher hurried to say.
"Where's Connor?," Angel asked, looking around. "He's upstairs," Wesley answered. "Cordelia and Gunn are watching him."
A hint of panic entered Angel's eyes, "Cordy and Gunn?," he asked. "Is that supposed to give me a good feeling?" He yelped slightly when Buffy elbowed him in the ribs.
"That's not a nice thing to say. I mean I wouldn't put my hand in for Cordelia either, but Gunn seems ... a nice guy. Hey, Wes," she gave the former watcher a quick smile.
"May I say congratulations," Wesley beamed at Buffy, then instantly blushed, "Angel ... uh ... told us you were expecting."
"Oh," Buffy who had looked at him quizzically, blushed as well. "Thanks."
"Okay, that's enough," Angel wrapped an arm around her shoulders and pulled her close. "Fred, could you ...," he shook his head, frowned, then sighed, "Wes, could you get something to eat for all of us? Please?"
"Yes, of course," he turned, gazed at Fred, "What about a short walk?"
*
"God, Angel, he's so ... cute," Buffy exclaimed, peering down at the sleeping baby. She couldn't help herself, from the moment she'd laid her eyes on him, she forgot everything about his background. Maybe it was because of hormones, she thought, but actually she didn't care. "What a beautiful baby."
The vampire sat in a chair, his gaze locked on the woman he loved, holding his son in her arms. He couldn't hide the pride in his voice, "Yeah. He's great. And he's healthy. He eats all the time," he grinned, "and it's a good thing I'm not much of a sleep person during the night."
She laughed, shifting the boy in her arms, "He's so small, but so perfect already." She looked up, her eyes moist, "I can hardly wait until ours is born."
"Yeah," Angel agreed, his voice rough. "Me neither. I'm glad you're okay with Connor," he said gently.
"Of course I am," Buffy smiled at the baby, "Nobody can resist such a cute boy. He's his own person. Who cares who his mother is." Suddenly she frowned, "She really killed herself so he could live?"
"Yes." The vampire stood up, walked over to the bed and sat down beside the blond. Connor fit perfectly into her arms. As if fate had intended for Buffy to me his mother from the start.
Reaching out, he traced the baby's rounded features with his forefinger, "I'm going to tell him when he's old enough. He should know that his mother loved him." When he saw Buffy looking at him doubtfully, he went on, "She did. Darla insisted that it was only the baby's soul making her do that. I don't know. We will never know, but I want to believe she really cared for him. And I'm going to tell him exactly that."
"You love him."
"Yes, I do," Angel agreed. "Are you ... okay with that?"
She smiled, "Yeah, actually ... as surprising as it sounds ... I never thought I would, but I ... love him already."
"Darla asked me to protect him from her," the vampire told her, his eyes on the baby. "She was afraid that the moment he was born she would turn against him. When she ...," he had to clear his throat, "When she was human, after she came back ... she couldn't handle the pain. And then ... she accepted it. I was so close ...," he had to blink against the moisture in his eyes, "so close. And then they brought Dru and made her a vampire again."
"I'm sorry," Buffy whispered, anxious to hear more. For the first time he was opening up to her, telling her what she wanted, needed, to hear. And it was good to hear about his problems for a change. So far everything had only been about her, and it helped your own perspective realising you weren't the only one struggling with life.
"She was dying, you know," he went on, "She was in an advanced stage of syphilis. She'd been dying when the master made her a vampire, and now, being human again, she was already too ill to help her. And she was so afraid. God, she was so afraid," the first tear was falling, "But then she accepted it ... I held her in his arms, and they...," he stopped, his hands clenched into fists, he quickly stood and walked back to his chair, sitting down.
His elbows propped on his knees, his hands dangling between them, he continued, "I was so angry. I couldn't remember being so angry before. I don't know what exactly happened, but I stopped caring. I tried to shut out the human part of my brain, which," he laughed shortly, harshly, "doesn't work, of course. But I tried. I even let Darla and Dru kill a bunch of lawyers."
He heard her gasp, and looked up, his eyes strangely vacant, and Buffy realised they were directed inside, seeing things in his mind, horrible things he felt responsible for. "They were evil. But nevertheless they were human, not demons, but I thought, what the heck. The world is a better place without them. But of course my soul still would rise its head, my conscience was bothering me at times I really didn't need it."
"So you tried to get rid of it?," she asked, but it wasn't really a question, and it told Angel that she'd understood.
"Not intentionally. When I ... slept with Darla ... it wasn't about my soul. I wasn't thinking straight anymore. I had fired my friends, had tried to stay as far away from them as possible. I pushed everything good away," he chuckled, "I even started wearing leather pants again."
Buffy couldn't help but grin, "Well, actually, that's not really a bad thing."
He grinned as well, but sobered instantly, "But you know what I mean. I tried to pretend I didn't have a soul anymore, that I could be a vampire even with a soul," he shook his head, "but I should have known it wouldn't work. It didn't work the first time."
She frowned, "The first time?"
He made a dismissive gesture with his hand, "Never mind. It's not ... important. Sleeping with Darla was never about sleeping with Darla, if you can understand that. It was ... I couldn't deal anymore. And Darla was ... she had been my haven for so long. I was her childe. Her creature. She made me. And feeling lost and lonely, I tried to return to the one person who had cared for me for over 100 years. I thought it would be soothing, helping me to feel good."
He chuckled again, shook his head, "I just forgot one thing, I still had a soul. I could pretend being bad as long as I wanted, but the soul was still there. And it refused to go away. And why should it. Having sex with a soulless demon can't give you happiness. It's empty. Although," he stood up again, walked back to the bed and sat down beside her, wrapping an arm around her shoulders, "I have to thank her for causing my epiphany."
"And for giving you Connor," Buffy added softly, looking at him.
He locked his eyes with her, smiled, "Yeah, for that, too."
*
Lilah stared at the surveillance transcripts, not able to believe her eyes. Angel and the Slayer were expecting a child. Not enough that he'd impregnated Darla. Now Buffy Summers was pregnant as well. Leaning back in her chair, a slow smile crept up her face. This was even better than she'd hoped. Maybe that was their ultimate chance to get rid of the annoying opponent. Hurting him where he was most vulnerable, and breaking him for good.
Darla hadn't been able to do it. But they had overestimated her hold on the dark-haired vampire. But Buffy Summers was an entirely different chapter. Lilah had read a lot about the famous slayer and her relationship with the vampire. It was no secret that Angel loved the blond. Maybe that love could be his downfall.
The End
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