Author: Jill
Disclaimer: let me check ... nope, still don't own them. Sigh! I'm not making any money off this. I've taken several lines from the Buffy-season-six-episode "Life Serial". This episode was written by David Fury and Jane Espenson.
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: B/A (strong in this part!), and the usual pairings from the show
Distribution: my site (http://www.never-ending-love.de), Land of Denial, if you have any of my stories, take it; anybody else tell me where it goes
Timeline: This is set into canon, in an attempt to make the whole series more B/A-friendly.
Spoilers: the whole B/A-canon to be sure, follows loosely "Midnight Angel","Midnight Whispers", "Midnight Rainbow", "Midnight Hour", "Midnight Memory", "Midnight Protector", "Midnight Letter", "Midnight Encounters", "Midnight Eyes, "Midnight Lovers", "Midnight Kiss", "Midnight Song", "Midnight Rose", "Midnight Velvet", "Midnight Sun", "Midnight Shade", "Midnight Secrets", and "Midnight Star". You should probably read it to understand this. And you should have seen season 6/3 or at least read the transcripts (http://www.psyche.kn-bremen.de), or you won't know what they're talking about.
Timeline: Set after "Fredless" and within "Life Serial".
Feedback: oh yes, please
"You are WHAT?"
Willow's half surprised, half angry shout still hang in the air, when Buffy finally found the courage to look up and into the faces of her friends and her sister who were staring at her. Some of those faces were incredulous. Some of them angry. Giles looked at her with warm understanding, while Dawn's eyes were wide with a curious interest, mixed with the tiniest bit of hurt.
"I'm pregnant," Buffy repeated, glad to feel Angel's presence behind her, feel his strength and support.
"You don't look pregnant," Anya remarked.
"That's right," the Slayer agreed. "I think it's because I'm the Slayer and ... you know ... all the training and ... stuff."
"That could be the solution for your money problems," the ex-demon said, always the practical one. "Just think about all those human women who hate themselves being so fat and unattractive during pregnancy. They would spend a lot of money to find a way to avoid it."
Buffy raised a brow, almost tempted to smile, but then she thought about her other friends in the room, and resisted the sudden urge.
"B- but ... how?," Dawn stuttered suddenly. "Riley ... uh ... I know you still think I'm just a kid, but he left a long time ago."
"That's right," Buffy said evenly, looking directly at her sister, "Riley isn't the father of this baby."
"We've all done the math already, Buff," Xander said, giving his fiancée an irritated glance, "So, who is the happy father of your brat?" He grinned to soften his words, but the Slayer heard the edge in them. And she couldn't really blame him. He was hurt by her lack of trust. Not telling her friends that there was a new man in her life.
"Yes, we would really like to know that." Willow's eyes were narrowed and the anger in them unmistakeable. "You obviously were seeing someone and none of us had any idea."
"Well, sorry Will for not giving you every intimate detail." Buffy's voice was clearly sarcastic.
"Maybe if you had told us at all, this wouldn't come as such a shock," Tara tried to mediate. "I- I don't mean that you had to ... you know," she gave the Slayer a little apologetic smile, "but I also understand that Willow is u-upset. She is your best friend a-and ...," she trailed off, shrugging a bit helplessly.
"And you are not saying a word to this?," Xander suddenly tossed at Angel, who was standing at the wall behind Buffy, his arms crossed, his body language seeming relaxed. None of them would have guessed that underneath he was rigid with tension. "But thinking about it ... you never talked a lot to us. Just to Buffy." He tilted his head, "You did talk, didn't you. Or did you spend all your time with your lips locked, you busy bunnies."
The vampire raised a brow, shifted his stance, his voice controlled, "What do you want me to say?"
"I don't know," Xander looked at him with a challenge in his eyes. "I know you are just a good friend these days, but you will never make me believe that the fact that someone knocked her up leaves you cold. Not a guy like you."
The other brow rose as well, as Angel made an involuntary step towards Buffy, then stopped. "A guy like me?," he couldn't help but smile a little bit at the comment. Xander had not the slightest idea what sort of guy he was.
"Yeah, you know, all possessive. Remember when this Fort-guy was around?"
"Xander!," Willow exclaimed suddenly. "What the hell are you doing? That's really not the point here. I mean, okay I want to know who the father is. But the problem is that Buffy lied to us. And besides, we all know Angel cannot be the father, so leave him out of this."
"Whoa, calm down, will you," Xander defended himself. "Who died and made you the boss?"
"Actually," Buffy said quietly, "I was just going to say that Angel's here for a reason. Because ... uh ... he *is* the father."
Silence.
Angel, who had come to stand beside Buffy, reached out to take her hand, and gratefully she accepted it.
"B-but he's a vampire!," Xander exclaimed.
"And?," Buffy looked at him.
"Didn't you tell us that they can't have kids?" Willow's accusing eyes rested on Giles.
"Uh ... yes ... but it seems ... this might be an exception," the watcher hurried to explain, although he still had no proof how it was possible. But he had several ideas. "My best guess at the moment," he turned his head to look at Buffy and Angel, "is that probably the unique Slayer physique might be responsible. There are many things we don't know about slayers. I wouldn't be surprised if your ... uh ... vaginal fluids might have ... er ... reviving qualities." He stumbled over his own words in the end, blushing slightly.
"Wow," Xander grinned, "You could have become a single teenage mother." Buffy gave him the evil eye, but his grin didn't waver. "Would have been a real thrill. Pregnant slayer hunts the father of her baby," he went on, frowning slightly, "Which leads me to the second question. Why isn't he evil?," he asked, pointing at Angel, but looking at Giles.
"It seems that is not a problem anymore," the watcher replied, smiling at the vampire. "We don't have an explanation, but it seems certain that the soul-problem doesn't exist anymore."
"Yeah, I've already guessed that," Xander said his gaze back on slayer and vampire, "And Angel junior is the living proof. Oh wait, Angel-junior? Gee, I'm going to end up baby-sitting for my favourite vampire on this planet." He rolled his eyes, but grinned again.
"Thanks for offering your services already," Angel said, grinning as well.
"Yeah, thanks," Buffy grinned too, "You really are a friend. It's good to know that we can have a nice slayage and you will stay changing pampers."
Xander's eyes widened in shock, "Changing diapers? Guys, I have no idea how to do this, I-"
"You are going to learn it," Anya said casually, then lowered her voice to a whisper, "And you can practice for your own."
Feeling suddenly weak, Xander closed his eyes and let himself fall back on the sofa.
Buffy exchanged a look with Angel, glad this had been easier than expected. She wanted to hug Xander for his way of taking the news, but one look at Dawn told her, that the subject wasn't closed.
"I'd say," Giles stood, and reached for a bottle of champagne he had found in the fridge before. "It's time to celebrate. Buffy and Angel," he looked at them. "Congratulations."
They both smiled at him, thanking him with their eyes for his support. He sipped from his glass, smiled too, but his eyes were very serious.
*
Buffy found her sister sitting on her bed, her eyes closed, her back leaning against the headboard, she was listening to music. Images flickered through the blonde's mind. Of other times she'd seen Dawn like this. Of a little girl she remembered, who had never existed. But real or not, for Buffy Dawn felt real, and at the moment it was all that counted.
"Hi," she said, tentatively stepping inside, "Can I come in?"
"You are already in," Dawn replied, not opening her eyes, her voice sounding slightly annoyed.
Forcing down the rush of disappointment at her sister's reaction, Buffy took a step back, "Sorry. I can leave, if you want."
The girl sighed, slowly opened her eyes, "Well, as I said, you're already in. So come on. I don't mind."
"Why do I have a hard time believing it?"
Dawn rolled her eyes, "Maybe because you dropped a bomb on all our heads and now have a hard time to deal with the reactions?"
"Maybe," Buffy agreed, sitting down on the edge of the bed, looking at her entwined hands. "I'm really sorry if I hurt you. You know, not telling you about Angel."
Her sister shrugged, trying to sound indifferent, "It's no big. It's your life. You can have sex with whomever you want."
"It wasn't-," Buffy started to say, but cut herself off. "Dawnie it was complicated. When Angel told me about his soul. It was the day of mom's funeral. I was needing him so badly. And then he was suddenly there. Not just as a friend, but I was free to love him. Really love him. Without fear, without ...," she paused. "And I ... was afraid, none of you would understand."
"Gee, how could we not understand that you wanted to screw him the day mom was buried?"
Dawn's words were like a blow, and Buffy felt tears well up in her eyes. Not willing to break down in front of her little sister, she stood up swiftly, and turned towards the door, when a hand held her back.
"I'm sorry," Dawn said, her voice suddenly small and apologetic. "It was awful to say that. I know it wasn't ... like this."
"No, it wasn't," Buffy confirmed, sitting down again, this time facing her sister. "Angel and I ... we ... for so long we weren't even allowed to kiss properly. And all of a sudden the barriers were gone. I could touch him without being afraid that something bad might happen, if we weren't careful. It was like a precious present on an otherwise dark day."
Dawn nodded solemnly, squeezing her sister's hand. Her voice was very hesitant, when she asked, "Willow said you always loved him. Is ... is it true?"
"Yeah," Buffy let out a little laugh, "Yeah, it is."
Her sister's forehead creased into a frown, "But ... what about Riley? I mean, I *know* you had sex with Riley. And you seemed ... happy. With Angel you always cried. And he was turning you upside down, with Riley it was so ... good."
Buffy had to smile again, "Oh, Dawn," she said, feeling a little helpless.
The girl's eyes suddenly lit up, "That's it, right?," she asked.
"What?"
"That's what all this love-stuff is about. The crying, the moaning, with Angel it was real. And with Riley ... but I liked Riley."
"I know," Buffy said softly.
"Although he sometimes ... most of the time ... treated me like a little kid," Dawn grumbled. "But he was really nice, too. And ... well, sometimes I even miss him."
"Yes, I understand," her big sister wrapped an arm around her shoulder. "Sometimes I miss him, too. But I missed Angel more. And I'm really glad he's back in my life. I need him, Dawn. And I love him. Very much."
"You do, huh?" Dawn looked at Buffy, and then she smiled. "Well, maybe it's a good thing. Not that anyone in this house ever listens to what I'm saying, but I think Angel's really hot."
"Dawn!," Buffy looked at her in shock.
But the little sister only grinned, "So, sue me! Don't tell me you don't think it, too."
They looked into each others eyes, and laughed.
*****
Sitting or standing on the porch seemed a thing she did a lot lately, Buffy thought, pulling her knees to her chest, encircling her legs with her arms, and resting her chin on them. How, she wondered, was she going to do this without Angel constantly at her side. He'd been here only two days and already she'd come to count on him. And she already missed him terribly although he had only left last night.
An urgent business, he'd said. Something his friends couldn't handle on their own. What the hell could be so important?
She sighed, hating her own thoughts. She was the Slayer, she knew there were always important things, things that called you at impossible times, at impossible situations, and you could do nothing but go. Cordelia had had a vision which meant the Powers were sending a message. Besides the after effects of Cordy's visions were getting worse, and Buffy had felt the concern in her lover when he'd talked to Wesley on the phone. She knew if she'd begged him, he probably would have stayed, but she also knew that she could never do such a thing.
She shivered slightly in the nightly breeze, and didn't turn when she heard the door open, and footsteps sounded on the wooden surface. "Are you alright?"
Willow. She had almost expected her. "Yeah, I'm fine."
"That's ... uh ... good," the redhead replied, finding a spot beside her, sitting down in the same way, her gaze directed into the night. They stayed like this for a long while, not talking, just sitting next to each other, and it would have been comfortable, hadn't Buffy felt the tension in her friend, hadn't she known that Willow wouldn't let her go so easily.
"Go on," she said finally, not able to stand the silence anymore. "Say it."
"Huh?," the witch turned her head and looked at her, "That was the reason you were asking for him all the time, right?," she asked.
"Yes. No." Buffy shrugged, "Probably. It was part of it. But not all. It's ... complicated."
"Yeah, I guess," Willow didn't sound convinced. She bit her lower lip, "But ... but why couldn't you tell me? I'm your best friend."
"Angel is the baby's father," the Slayer argued. "He had a right to know first."
"And I was the one who brought you back from the dead," the redhead snapped, her jealousy surfacing.
"I'm aware of this," Buffy said, gritting her teeth.
Willow's voice turned gentle, pleading, "I love you Buffy ... I ... I did this because I love you. Why do I have the feeling you don't trust me?"
The blond thought about her conversation with Angel, his remarks regarding Willow. And she remembered the argument she'd overheard in the kitchen with Giles. Could she really trust her the way she always had? Was this still the same Willow? But of course she couldn't tell her that. "It has nothing to do with trust," she said slowly, "But I ... I love Angel. I've always loved him. Without him, I felt lost. I ... I needed him here."
There were sudden tears in the redhead's eyes, "You needed him? More than us? More than ... me? But ... I made all this possible," she said, gesturing with her hands, "without me there would be no baby, no Buffy either."
Buffy couldn't help herself, the anger she felt suddenly got the best of her, "God, Willow. Can't you get over yourself. Is there anything these days you talk about but your powers?," she almost shouted.
The witch was taken aback, staring at the Slayer as if she'd never seen her before. "B-but ...," she suttered, standing up in one fluent motion. "I don't understand any of this," she cried, her tears spilling over. "I've helped you. I saved you from a horrible fate in hell, and now everyone ... first Giles and now you ... I ... I ..." Obviously not able to find the words, Willow turned and stormed into the house.
Buffy swore beneath her breath, ran both hands through her hair. The whole day had been a mess. With the strange things that had happened at college, and then at Xander's construction site and at the magic box. Could life get any weirder. "Shit, shit, shit," she swore again. Whatever she had done, Willow had been her best friend for years, and Buffy didn't like the way they had just parted.
"Pissed off Red, huh?"
And if you thought a day was already really bad, it could always get worse. "Spike," she said on an exhaled breath.
"Slayer." He tilted his head, looked at her, his eyes serious, and for a moment Buffy was tempted not to see the bottomless evil in them. "Feeling lonely without your lover, huh?"
Her head snapped up, but after a moment, she relaxed and sighed, "I don't even want to know how you know this?"
He smirked, sat down at the same spot Willow had occupied just before, "It was quite a show you two gave the other night on the porch."
Buffy closed her eyes for a moment, and shook her head, "God, you're disgusting, Spike."
The vampire shrugged, grinning, "Yeah, well, it's part of being evil. Ex boy-toy wouldn't have liked it, I guess. You never moaned the same way with him."
No, she wouldn't respond to this, she decided. It didn't deserve a reaction. But, God, she missed Angel, and Willow's behaviour hadn't helped her to feel better tonight.
"Wanna have a bit of this?"
Turning her head she saw Spike holding up a bottle of what had to be alcohol. It smelled like alcohol. "No," she said, shaking her head. She had never been very much for this stuff, besides she was pregnant now, and she knew enough about pregnancy that alcohol wasn't any good for babies.
He shrugged again, taking a sip, "Makes you feel better you know," he told her.
That on the other hand was something she needed badly at the moment, "Really?," she asked, frowning instantly. "No, don't answer that. I'm not going to drink."
"Suit yourself." Spike took another gulp, and Buffy watched his face relax with pleasure. It was really tempting. "Peaches off for urgent business, huh?"
"Yeah." She hated it. Why the hell had he left? Dammit, it wasn't fair. He was off slaying demons while she had to face Willow's anger. Would one try really hurt the baby? "That and there's this thing ... someone's doing stuff to me. Messing up my life. Except that it was kind of pre-messed already. You know, being dead, then coming back, school is a pain, and jobs ...," she sighed, "pretty bad even without the evil."
"So you, uh, just what? Gonna let this whoever play you till it figures out what kills you?"
She shrugged, her eyes darting to the bottle in his hand, "Giles is working on it."
He laughed, drank again, realising her eyes were following his movements closely, "Oh, good, 'cause Giles wields the mighty force of library books."
"You'd do better?"
"Damn right," he shouted. "I'd hit the demon world."
She sighed, eyed the flask again, then suddenly grabbed it and took a large gulp. "Blaaaah!" Her face contorted in disgust and she had to shake her head. "God, what the hell is this?"
"Good old Scottish Whiskey." He grinned at her.
"Tastes like ...," she shuddered slightly but reached for the bottle again, "Here let me take another try, maybe...," she swallowed, her face contorted again. "Holy Jesus," she shouted, and tried to shake off the horrible taste in her mouth. "How often do you drink this?"
"It's good stuff," he insisted.
"No wonder you don't have a soul. Tasting this a soul would try to escape as soon as possible."
"One more reason to drink. Who wants a soul?" Spike grabbed his flask and gulped the rest down. "About your problem. We should go, ask questions, throw punches, find out what's in the air. Hmm? It's fun, too."
Buffy wasn't used to drinking alcohol and the effects were showing already. For a short moment she thought about Angel and the baby, but her dazed mind shut them out quickly. Still, there remained a certain amount of rational thinking. "It's not my kind of fun."
"Yeah. It is," Spike insisted. "And your life is gonna get a lot less confusing when you figure it out."
Her voice slightly slurred, Buffy, looked at him, "You have had *so* too much to drink at this point, I am cutting you off."
"You're a creature of the darkness. Like me," he said, wishing he had another drink with him. "Try on my world. See how good it feels."
She considered it for a moment, then tilted her head, "Are there drinks in your world?"
*
Spike leaned towards Buffy, lowering his voice, when they entered the backroom of the bar, "These lowlifes know everything that happens in this town."
"Oh, good," the Slayer replied loudly, making the vampire wince "There are the lowlifes."
"Gee. Maybe a little louder?," he hissed, walking over to the table. "Boys what's the game?"
A green demon with horns looked up, "You know the game, Spike. You in?"
"He kills our kind. Don't let him in," another demon with more than just the two usual eyes grumbled.
With a swift movement, Spike grabbed the demon and pulled him out of his chair.
"Ooh, ask him if he's heard-," Buffy started, but the vampire cut her off.
"Later." He shoved the demon towards the door, then sat down in his seat and picked up the cards.
The Slayer rolled her eyes, "You're gonna play cards?"
Giving her an exasperated glance, Spike gave the other demons a fake smile, "I need a moment with my lady," he said, and when he saw them shrug, he got up, walked over Buffy and pulled her with him.
She frowned, and shoves him off, but turned anyway, "You wanna play, that's fine," she told him. "Okay? I'm sticking to the original plan." She gestured towards the demons at the table, "Which one do I kill for information?"
"Listen," Spike took her arm again, his voice urgent, "These guys talk while they play. We'll get more information out of their mouths than out of gaping holes in their corpses.
Buffy frowned again, her eyes darting from Spike to the demons and back, finally gave him a curt nod. He sighed, returning to the desk, while Buffy found a seat nearby, the bottle, Spike had bought just before, firmly clasped in her hand.
"I'm in. Everybody okay with that?," the vampire said, not really expecting the others to answer.
A demon that looked as if his skin was too big for him shrugged. "Ante up." Then he and the others reached under their chairs and each of them produced a kitten.
Buffy's eyes widened, "You play for kittens?"
"So, who's gonna advance me a tiny tabby, get me started?," Spike asked, ignoring her. "Come on, someone's gotta stake me," he addressed the demons.
"I'll do it," Buffy shouted from behind, grinning broadly. The vampire turned his head, gave her a look, making her grin even more. "What," she asked. "You though I was just gonna let that lie there?" Chuckling slightly, she opened the bottle, took a swig, a picture of Angel flickering before her inner eye, but she suppressed it quickly. He had left her. For a case. In L.A. He could go to hell. She was feeling far too good right now, to think about the problems in her life.
*****
Angel wasn't sure this was some wacky nightmare he was having when he brought his car to a halt in front of a lowlife bar in Sunnydale. He'd left for L.A. to slay a Durslar Beast, Cordy had seen in a vision, only to have Fred disappearing in the process, her parents showing up, and then a giant bug had almost made an end to all their lives.
As a result he'd been held up in L.A. for a whole day, instead of coming back immediately the way he'd intended. As soon as the sun had set tonight he'd left again, needing to be with Buffy again. He felt a little pang of guilt for still not telling his friends in L.A. the truth about Buffy and he, but he hadn't wanted to go into this tonight and being held up even longer. He could just see Cordy's reaction. She was already pissed enough because he had left for Sunnydale again.
Rolling his eyes at the image, Angel turned off the ignition. So he'd arrived in Sunnydale only to find Willow in tears, turning away from him without a word, and only thanks to Dawn's curiosity he knew that Buffy had gone off with Spike.
Spike.
He should have staked him long ago. But he would do it now, as soon as he found him. He'd always been cocky, but obviously living only with Drusilla for so long had led him to believe he could do what he wanted. It didn't really surprise Angel that Spike had taken advantage of Buffy in her present state, it was so like him. Trying to pull her to his side by offering the easy way out.
That was how a vampire thought. Usually he would just turn her. But because of the chip, and because she was the Slayer, he hadn't managed to do it. So he was just trying to show her how easy it was to let go. Buffy was still shaken from her recent experience and receptive for this kind of bullshit. Dammit, he shouldn't have left. He knew she needed him. Now more than ever.
Of course if he hadn't gone to L.A. only God knew what would've happened. The bug might have eaten his friends, and Fred would be gone. And he didn't want her gone. She fit into their group. And he liked her. Genuinely liked her. She was nice, sometimes crazy, but that made her so fitting. He would have missed her.
Sure, Buffy was *so* not going to like seeing Fred looking at him that way she always did. With a little too much hero admiration in her eyes and sparks of some kind of puppy dog love. Well, Buffy was going to have to get used to it. And besides, it wasn't as if he'd ever encouraged Fred to look at him that way.
Annoyed with his own train of thoughts, he climbed out of the car. At the moment Fred was certainly a minor problem in his life. And Buffy might be a little jealous, and also a bit possessive, but he was sure she knew he would never betray her. An image of Darla came into his mind and he winced inwardly.
Dammit. This wasn't the time for this. He had to find her first. With everything else he could deal later.
*
Spike looked at his cards, grinned, and put them on the table. The other demons groaned seeing his cards and threw their own down. The bleached blond vampire smiled, stood, started to collect the kittens from the table, stuffing them into a basket.
"You're lucky today," the green demon with the horns remarked.
"Got my lucky charm with me," Spike replied, gesturing with a hand that was holding a kitten towards the drunken Slayer.
"Yeah. I'm starting to think you cheat," the demon with the loose skin said, narrowing his eyes.
Spike was about to answer when his arm was caught in midair. His head snapping around, he didn't feel as cocky anymore. He was suddenly face to face with his grand-sire. His very, very angry grand-sire. Amber eyes blazing, Angel was in full game-face. "Do you now?," the dark-haired vampire asked, looking at the loose-skinned demon. "Well, let me tell you my friend. I know he cheats. He always did."
"I knew it," the multi-eyed demon jumped from his chair.
"Uh ... guys," Spike gave them a fake bright smile, trying to pull his arm from Angel's grip, but it didn't do any good. Each time he pulled, the dark-haired vampire's fingers closed tighter around his forearm.
"What the hell do you think you're doing, Spike?," Angel growled, nodding into Buffy's direction. She was sitting on her chair, blinking drunkenly at the scene before her.
The blond vampire grinned, "Mate, I was just showing your girl how to have a good time. No worries."
If possible, the demon eyes got even more dangerous, "Leave that to me," he hissed, turned towards the demons, "Sorry, guys, I have to take this ... *boy* with me."
The green demon grinned, "Take him." Turning to the others, he added, "Looks as if he's going to get what he deserves."
*
Shoving Spike in front with one hand, pulling Buffy with him with the other, Angel emerged from the bar. He tried to stay calm and rational, but inwardly he was fuming. Not so much because of Buffy, although he didn't like her being drunk, and being almost five months pregnant at the same time. Yet, he knew that she was only partly responsible for the things that had happened tonight.
With too much force he shoved Spike against a wall, and with satisfaction he heard a loud crack. The ribs would heal, but the breaking would hurt like hell.
"Ow," the blond vampire yelled, giving Angel an evil look. "That hurt."
"Good," his grand-sire. "I should do much more for the stunt you pulled tonight. Look at her," he pointed behind him at Buffy.
Spike shrugged, "She had a good time."
"Yeah," the Slayer agreed, grinning. "I had a good time."
"You shut up," Angel shouted at her, instantly regretting it, when he saw her face crumble. Aw, he was so damned tired, and had been so worried finding her missing, gone with Spike. And now he had made her feel miserable. As if she didn't feel bad enough already. Turning towards her, he softened his voice, "I'm sorry, baby. I didn't want to shout at you."
The first tears slipped from her eyes, "You w-were gone. A-and I was feeling like shit tonight. A-and ...," she started to cry, burying her face in her hands.
"See, what you did," Spike shouted from a safe distance. "*You* made her cry now."
"Shut up," Angel whirled towards him. "Go," he yelled. "Leave. Now. Or I'm going to do, what I wanted in the first place."
"Yeah, well, you were loud enough," Spike replied, holding his hurting ribs. "I didn't mean to do her harm. I love her, dammit," he insisted.
His grand-sire took a deep breath, then slightly shook his head, eager to get rid of Spike, to take care of the crying Slayer behind him. "I'm tempted to believe you. But she's human, Spike. She has a soul. She isn't a vampire like you, like Dru. You can't treat her like you treated Drusilla. You may be different from other vampires, or think you are, but you are not. The love you think you're feeling is destructive, you don't love, you just want to possess."
"That's the same."
"For a vampire, yes," Angel agreed. "But not for a human. Buffy's soul is very fragile at the moment. This is my last warning, Spike. If you ever try to come near her again, I'm ending your sorry existence. Understood?"
"But ... I'm helping her. You won't be around all the time-," Spike tried to argue, but Angel cut him off.
"I don't care. She doesn't need your help. She has her friends. She's the Slayer, and I'm here too. You think you help her because you're strong, but she doesn't need that kind of strength. The kind of strength she needs now you can't give her. Because you don't have a soul. So stay away. GO! Now!"
*
"God, I feel awful," Buffy groaned, closing her eyes, glad for the wet washcloth Angel had brought for her head. "I'm never going to drink again. Seems I wanted to make up for skipping the early pregnancy nausea," she tried to joke. But Angel didn't smile, when she looked at him. He looked at her through serious eyes. Taking a deep breath, she took his hand, "Angel, I'm sorry."
His lips turned up into a smile, "I know," he said gently. "I'm not angry."
"Thanks." She made a face, groaning again. "My head feels as if it's going to split in two."
He had to grin, "Good."
In response she rolled her eyes, regretting it instantly, "Oh God," she moaned, "Thanks so much for your compassion."
He chuckled, "You're not getting any from me. But I'm sorry because I wasn't there when you needed me."
"No," she replied quickly, instantly regretting the movement. God, her head hurt like hell. She didn't even want to think how it would feel in the morning. "I was just ... acting stupid. I just hope," she bit her lower lip, "I didn't hurt the baby."
He gave her a smile, putting a gentle hand on her stomach, "I don't think so. This is the baby of a vampire and a Slayer. I think it's pretty tough."
"You think?," she asked doubtfully.
"Yeah, I'm sure," he smiled again, "Move over," he ordered.
A smile appeared on her face as well, "I missed you last night," she told him, when he lay down beside her. She felt incredibly tired all of a sudden, "Don't go again. At least not so soon," she said, yawning, her eyes already closing.
"I won't," he promised, wrapping his arms around her, pulling her close. "Not if I can help it," he whispered, but she couldn't hear him anymore.
END
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