Author: Jill
Disclaimer: Hysterical laughter - who wants them anyway these days? I'm not
making any money off this. Several lines of this are taken from the
Angel-season3-episode "Forgiving". The episode was written by Jeffrey Bell.
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: B/A (strong in this part!), and the usual pairings from the show
Distribution: my site (http://www.never-ending-love.de), Land of Denial, if you
have any of my stories, take it; anybody else tell me where it goes
Spoilers: Everything up to the season 3/6 episodes mentioned above is fair game.
Timeline: This is set into canon, in an attempt to make the whole series more
B/A-friendly. Well at least it started out like this. As B/A are together now, I
was forced to make some changes. You'll see them as soon as you read the story.
This is set within "As You Were"
Spoilers: the whole B/A-canon to be sure, follows loosely "Midnight Angel",
"Midnight Whispers", "Midnight Rainbow", "Midnight Hour", "Midnight Memory",
"Midnight Protector", "Midnight Letter", "Midnight Encounters", "Midnight Eyes,
"Midnight Lovers", "Midnight Kiss", "Midnight Song", "Midnight Rose", "Midnight
Velvet", "Midnight Sun", "Midnight Shade", "Midnight Secrets", "Midnight Star",
"Midnight Dance", "Midnight Wind", "Midnight Storm", "Midnight Fire", "Midnight
Breath", "Midnight Wishes", "Midnight Sky", "Midnight Crossing", "Midnight
Illusion", and "Midnight Confession". You should probably read it to understand
this. And you should have seen season 6/3 or at least read the transcripts or you
won't know what they're talking about.
Summary: "Forgiving"- Midnight-style
Feedback: oh yes, please - this goes without saying - pretty please?
Dedication: For Smurf - there is no Spoon!
Note: In order for this story (and the whole series) to work, I'll break the habit of using the BtVS and AtS timeline the way I have before (as if it was happening at the same time). I will now concentrate on AtS for a while. The episodes "Loyalty" and "Sleep Tight" happened the way they did on the show. This is going to replace the episode "Forgiving". Some parts of the actual episode will remain unchanged, especially all the Fred/Gunn parts, or when Wolfram & Hart come into the mix. When this story starts, baby-Connor is gone.
Note 2: I know, I know, you will hate me now for letting Holtz take Connor in this as well, but I'm still trying to stick as close to the show as possible. That's what I always intended to do and that's the way it goes. If you want another storyline, read "Almost Home" a story I finished just a short while ago. Maybe you'll like that better
*****
She didn't know what to say to him, Buffy thought when she tentatively pushed at the door to Angel's apartment and it revealed her lover sitting on the ground, staring into the baby crib, his room almost destroyed from earthquake and fire. What could you say to someone who had lost a part of his heart?
Unconsciously she placed her hands on her protruding belly as if to protect the unborn child in there. How would Angel feel towards their baby, now that Connor was gone? He hadn't even called her. Fred had been the one on the phone, almost out of her mind with grief and confusion, and it had taken Buffy a while to figure out what had happened. Yet, the fact that someone had taken Connor to another dimension was still beyond her comprehension.
She knew a lot of people hated Angel. She also knew that Holtz had reasons to hate him, but how could he justify taking an innocent child? Up to a certain point, Buffy could understand Holtz's hatred for Angel. The demon had murdered his whole family, had turned his daughter. Holtz had been raised with a certain code of honor, where revenge was part of everyday life. Even though in Buffy's eyes Angel had nothing to do with his demon's crimes, she could at least see why the ancient demon hunter was trying to get to the vampire.
But taking Connor?
That was beyond Buffy's comprehension.
And then there was the problem of Wesley. Lorne's words were still ringing in her ears that the former watcher hadn't just taken Connor out for a stroll. That he had never planned to come back again. Buffy had seen Wesley, had talked to him frequently over the last few months since her reconciliation with Angel, and she'd gotten the impression the Englishman was nothing but a friend to the vampire. And now he had taken his child.
It didn't make any sense. No sense at all.
But this wasn't about Wesley, Buffy reminded herself, walking into the room, closing the door silently. This was about Angel, about a father grieving for his son.
"Did you find any information? If not, you can just leave." He thought she was one of his friends, Buffy thought a bit startled, and alarmed. He hadn't sensed her - that had never happened before. His voice was strangely without emotion, his body language tired and angry at the same time, and he was radiating such grief, she could barely stand it.
A strangled sound came from her throat, surprising her as much as him. "Angel," she whispered his name, felt the tears well up in his eyes. So far she'd only heard about Connor, but now, seeing Angel, seeing the empty crib in front of him, it all hit her full force. Connor wasn't her son, would never be, but he was a part of Angel, and she loved him. And now he was gone. From what Lorne had told her, in the blink of an eye. "Oh, Angel," she repeated, kneeling down behind him, not caring that the burnt debris on the ground would ruin her white pants forever. They were too big anyway, only bought for the occasion, and really, it didn't matter right now.
Slowly, gently, she slipped her arms around him from behind, ignoring the way his body stiffened, his body language telling her to stay away. "I'm so sorry," she whispered. "So very sorry. I wish I could've been there."
He didn't respond, his body like iron in her arms. She could feel that he had stopped breathing, a habit he was so accustomed to, even though he didn't need it, he usually did it in his sleep. Angel stopping to breathe was always a sure sign of distress. Kissing him softly on his neck, she tightened her embrace, "But now I'm here. And we're going to get him back." She didn't believe her own lies, but she needed them as much as he did.
"Wesley took him." Angel said finally, the three words so full of suppressed fury, it made her shiver. "He took my son."
"I know. Lorne told me. But why?" It still didn't make sense, not anymore than it did five minutes ago. Wes just wasn't that kind of person. Not even when he was in Sunnydale had she'd believed him capable of such betrayal.
"I don't care why," Angel replied forcefully, standing up and dislodging himself from her embrace. "All I care about now is getting my son back. Then I'll deal with those responsible. They'll all pay. Including Wesley. I need to talk to Lorne."
"Angel, wait," she pleaded before he could leave the room.
With his hand on the doorknob he paused, and after taking a deep breath, he said, "Buffy, I'm glad you're here, but now is not the time-"
"I know," she interrupted him, coming to stand behind him. "That's not what I wanted to say. But pregnant or not, I'm still the Slayer. I just wanted to say, you can count on me."
After a long moment, her only answer was a nod, before Angel walked out of the room.
*
She followed him down the steps, seeing his friends still assembled in the lobby. Angel looked at Lorne, "Quor-toth dimension. Ever hear of it?"
"No," the red-horned demon shook his green head.
"That's where the portal lead. That's where my son is now. Quor-toth. Find out everything about it." Angel's voice was firm, almost commanding. It left no room for discussion.
"Yes." Obviously Lorne had come to the same conclusion and left the hotel.
"We're going there, aren't we?" Gunn asked, taking Fred's hand.
"I am," Angel replied sharply not looking at him. He was busy searching for a pen and a paper.
"You're certainly not going alone," Buffy's voice was equally firm, daring him to disagree. She was far from helpless. Sure her stomach was growing steadily and sometimes even was a real obstacle, but only last night she'd killed three vampires without so much as an extra breath. Obviously being pregnant only enhanced her abilities. Of course, she'd never tell Angel that. But it was still good to know she could hold more than just her own in a fight.
"What she said," Gunn crossed his arms in front of his chest. "We're all going."
"Right," Fred confirmed, her chin coming up.
Did Angel even realise how loyal his friends were? Buffy thought. In only a short time he'd managed to find his own little family in L.A. They weren't the same ones she had in Sunnydale. But the love between them was certainly not less. That Cordy was still missing, away on vacation with her extra-dimensional lover, didn't hurt either. The former cheerleader had changed, but Buffy wasn't sure if having her around would help the situation any.
The vampire's gaze flickered over his friends, before he nodded, "Good."
"It's just," Gunn frowned, "I mean, don't we have to open one of those portals first?"
"Yeah." Angel had obviously found what he'd been searching for, because he started to draw something.
"Right." Gunn looked at Fred, then at Buffy, "But the last time we had to do that, I mean, well, it wasn't any of us that knew how. The guy that figured it out Angel, how are we gonna do this without-"
"We don't need him," Angel cut him off forcefully.
"We don't?" Fred looked puzzled.
"No," Angel shook his head firmly, "We're gonna find that SOB who opened up the portal in the first place." He sat down in Wes' chair to finish his sketch, "His name is Sahjhan. He's some kind of inter-dimensional demon. He's been behind this from the beginning."
Buffy looked at the picture of the demon responsible for Connor's abduction, then at Angel. Their eyes met and held. They would find the demon - and they would make him talk.
*
"It's Monday." Fred looked up from the file in her lap, a frown on her forehead. "What time is it in Mexico?"
"In Mexico?" Buffy asked in sudden alarm. There was only one person- "What are you doing?" she asked when Fred started to pick up the phone.
Fred gave the Slayer a puzzled look, "Calling Cordelia."
"No," Buffy shook her head firmly.
"Why not?"
"Because," the blond bit her lip, "First of all there is no need. Cordelia can't help anyway. I mean, if she's having a vision, she's going to call, right?" It wasn't that Buffy didn't like the brunette seer, because with all the changes in Cordelia's life the former may queen had improved immensely. Lately Buffy was even considering a friendship. But having her around right now would only test the Slayer's already frail nerves.
"She's right," Angel nodded, not looking up from his file, "Cordy doesn't need to be afraid, too. She should enjoy her vacation. She hasn't have one in - forever. Besides ," he swallowed, "She'll be back soon anyway. And when she does she'll have presents, for Connor. --- And he's gonna be here so she can give them to him, okay?"
Taken aback, Fred looked flustered, "Okay," she whispered.
Angel closed his eyes, and Buffy saw he was trying to pull himself together, "No. It's I'm sorry."
"No - no," Fred replied quickly.
Standing up in one fluid motion, Angel exchanged a quick glance with Buffy, and she got up as well. "This - I can't do this," he gestured at the scattered files, "I gotta go."
He walked out of the hotel, Buffy following him without question. She would be with him. He needed her now, more than ever. Besides, it would drive her crazy to stay and wait.
*
"There is no way we can open this portal," were the words Lorne greeted them with when he returned to the hotel, frowning at Angel who was busy at the weapon's cabinet. Then his eyes wandered to the Slayer, "This - this Quor-toth dimension is . - everyone's afraid of it." He risked another irritated glance at Angel, who was now pulling out a staple remover.
"What is he doing?" the green demon wanted to know.
Buffy simply shrugged, "Preparing," was her cryptic answer.
"Preparing?" Lorne echoed, not liking the _expression in the eyes of his friends. They were not looking friendly at all. More determined and somehow deadly. "For what-," he shook his head, "Anyways. The people I talked to - they're not easily rattled. And that's, that's not all." Seeing Angel pick up the note-spike, removing the notes, he tilted his head, "*What* are you doing?" The demon's eyes once again found the Slayer, "The portal? It was not a real portal - because there are no portals to Quor-toth."
"Not a real portal?" Buffy asked.
Glad that at least one of the two seemed to listen to him, Lorne went on, "The only way in - is to rip right through the fabric of reality."
Without looking at his friends, Angel started to walk up the stairs, with Buffy followed him instantly. Lorne sighed, but followed them anyway. "This isn't a matter of finding an inter-dimensional hotspot for conjuring an opening with a simple incantation. To punch through to Quor-toth would require dark, dark magic, the kind of power it takes centuries to aquire."
Buffy flinched slightly at the mention of dark-magic but continued to follow Angel. They had a guest to attend to. It certainly would be interesting. When Angel came to a stop in front of his apartment, Lorne once again tried to get the vampire's attention, "Angel, I know this isn't easy for you but you got to hear it. If you somehow managed to get in, finding Connor would be like looking for a needle in a haystack - the size of China."
Angel's forehead drew together in a frown, "Needles. Should have thought of that." Shaking his head, he went into his old apartment.
Following his friend and the Slayer, Lorne tried for a last time, "You just don't have the resources to conjure up that much dark power."
With a cold smile that would've made Angelus proud, Angel nodded at the man bound to a chair in middle of the room. "Oh," he said in a voice that made Lorne's blood freeze, "But I think we do."
Feeling himself going pale, the green demon sent a desperate glance at the Slayer before asking, "Angel? Who is this?"
"Linwood Morrow," the bound man introduced himself, "Division president of Special Projects at Wolfram and Hart and - you are?"
"Ah," Lorne stared at him for a moment, hoping this was just a nightmare he was going to wake up from soon. Although - unfortunately - it didn't look that way. "Deeply troubled."
Ignoring the conversation going on between them, Angel started to arrange different implements on the table behind the Wolfram and Hart employee, only looking up once when Buffy handed him a small steel needle. He looked at her questioningly, but when she only shrugged, he nodded, continuing with his task.
"Once the firm finds out what you've done- " Linwood started.
"They'd kill you before they kill me," Angel replied, not taking his eyes from the items on the table, picking up a razor blade and testing its sharpness.
"Angel," Lorne tried to intervene again. This was getting totally out of hand, "This isn't just some slimy demon you got trussed up here. He's human," the demon glanced at the man, "okay, marginally, but still. This isn't gonna bring Connor back." When the vampire didn't react, he looked at Buffy, "Hey, Goldilocks. Can't you talk to him? This is madness."
The Slayer simply shrugged, "I could. But then I'd have to care. And," she sent Linwood a look that equaled Angel's, "so far I haven't found it in me."
"I can't believe this." Lorne threw his hands in the air, "You two are completely insane."
"Probably," Buffy agreed lightly, then turned to Linwood, "So you're a lawyer, huh?"
"More of a manager."
"Ah," she nodded, "And people are afraid of you?"
"Most of the time, yeah."
She smiled then, and Lorne didn't think he'd ever seen anything like that before on her face. For the first time he realised why she was feared by vampires and demons alike.
Her smile never wavering, Buffy leaned right into the man's face, "Not anymore, though," she whispered, winking at him.
Starting to sweat, Linwood tried to get a peek at Angel who was still standing behind him, "This is still kidnapping, assault and battery, and attempt..." he gulped when he saw the vampire picking up the note-spike, "none of which - I intend to press. Hey, wanna find that baby-boy? I guarantee the full force of Wolfram and Hart will be at your disposal."
"Oh yeah?" Buffy grinned, but her eyes were dead serious when they met Angel's over the manager's head, "Please do go on."
"I need the Cell phone in my pocket," Linwood said.
Instantly Angel's hand went into the pocket, holding the ringing phone at the man's ear. "Hello, Lilah," Linwood said, "I'm sending over some clients, and I want you to listen very carefully because I have explicit instructions on how to deal with them. - Give them anything they want."
*
When Lorne followed Buffy and Angel out of the door, he gave them confused glances, "You never even intended to hurt him, right?"
When Angel didn't answer, he looked at Buffy, "Right?"
In response the Slayer simply shrugged.
*****
"Angel, stop," Buffy said firmly, when Angel's axe met the ground for a third time. When he attempted to hit the ground again, she simply intervened by grabbing his arm. "No."
For a moment his eyes were confused, but then they focussed on her, "Buffy, I-"
"It's alright," she smiled at him, cupping his cheek. "I know you want to know where Connor is, so do I. But they've done all they can."
"Yes," Linwood shouted, "listen to her."
"You, shut up," Buffy warned without taking her eyes from Angel. "They are not worth it, Angel. We're going to find Sahjhan, and then we're going to get Connor back. I swear."
The vampire blinked, then swallowed. But before he could answer, Lilah's phone rang, She listened, and her face lit up, "Hey, Flag on the play. The firm's tech team just registered a severe bio-plasmic disturbance at Tabor and National at the same time as the spell."
Angel's head came up with a snap, "Sahjhan?"
"Whatever flipped a two ton truck like a Tonka toy."
Instantly Slayer and vampire turned away only to come face to face with Fred and Gunn at the bottom of the stairs, "We need to talk," Fred said breathlessly.
"No, not now," Angel replied, attempting to get past her.
"There's something you need to know before," she tried, and when they didn't listen, she cried, "The father will kill the son!"
"What?" Slayer and Vampire turned at the same time, staring at her, "What are you talking about?" Buffy demanded.
"There is a prophecy in the Nyazian Scrolls. Wesley checked it. The translations. The commentaries. Even went to the mystical oracles, but he couldn't disprove it."
"They already fed you Connor's blood, bro," Gunn added, "You said it yourself. He smelled like food."
"He was tying to protect Connor," Fred said.
"By taking him away?" Buffy asked incredulously. "Why didn't he come to me? I'm the Slayer, remember. I could've protected Connor until we found out what it really meant."
"It's a lie anyway," Angel was trying to control his rage, "I'd never hurt Connor."
"No," Buffy put a hand on his arm, "You wouldn't." She turned to Fred and Gunn, "The only one able to hurt Connor would've been Angelus. But we know he can't come back. So what the hell was Wes thinking?"
"There's the prophecy," Fred tried to remind them.
"It wouldn't be the first one proven wrong." Angel was getting impatient. While discussing matters not important right now, they were losing time.
"He is right. Wes was wrong," Buffy echoed the vampire's thoughts, "And he acted wrong. We have to talk about this, have to find out what really happened. But we don't have the time for this right now. Our first priority is Connor. Later we can deal with Wes." With this vampire and Slayer left.
*
"I'm so sorry," Buffy said when she and Angel returned from their encounter with Sahjhan and Justine. The vampire hadn't said a word ever since they'd left Gunn and Fred to find Wesley. Angel just couldn't find it in him to care for his missing ex-partner. And Buffy couldn't blame him for it. She wasn't sure of her own feelings towards the ex-watcher right now. Of course Wesley had been tricked by Sahjhan, but it still couldn't justify taking Angel's son away without trying to find a solution, namely calling Buffy first.
"Hey."
Slayer and vampire stopped, "Tara? Xander?" Buffy was stunned.
"Yeah uhm," the blond witch smiled shyly, while Xander greeted both with a nod.
"Tara," the Slayer walked over to Willow's ex-girlfriend. "What are you doing here?"
"Hey, it isn't my fault, she made me drive her over."
Giving Xander only a fleeting glance, Angel joined witch and Slayer. "You came because of Connor."
"Yes, uh Fred called," Tara confirmed, looking at the vampire with her big, serious eyes. "I " she pointed at a big book behind her, "I'm not anywhere near as powerful as Willow, but maybe, I could help?"
"I don't think so," Angel turned away. "We've tried everything we can."
Looking at her lover's back, her heart breaking for him, Buffy had to take a deep breath before turning back to her friends, "It was great of you to come."
"Is he going to be alright?" Xander wanted to know.
As if you would care, was the thought on Buffy's tongue, but she suppressed it. It would do no good to get into an argument tonight. Besides, did it really matter right now why Xander had agreed to drive Tara? Although Buffy agreed with Angel that the witch probably couldn't help them, would it really hurt to try?
"So what do you want to do?" she asked the blond witch.
"L-lorne here," Tara smiled at the green-skinned demon, who was talking to Angel in the background, "told us what happened. Did you find the demon you were looking for?"
"Yeah," Buffy nodded, "Unfortunately he can't do anything for us. It seems Lorne was right. Sahjhan's power was only strong enough for one journey, built up for hundreds of years. After Holtz and Connor went through the portal, all the power was exhausted." She glanced at Angel and Lorne who were going into Wesley's former office. "So, the way it looks we can't get him back."
"I see," Tara replied sadly. "It sounds final."
"Right now," Buffy went on, not taking her eyes from the pair in Wesley's office, "I'm more concerned about Angel. He's angry, and sad, and grieving, and it's all okay, and normal, but " she paused, combing a hand through her hair, "I'm scared."
"Scared?" Xander straightened and he glared at the vampire, who didn't notice him.
"Relax, Xand," the Slayer said on a sigh. "I'm not scared of Angel. He wouldn't hurt me. Contrary to some people's beliefs he isn't a monster. He's the gentlest person I know, with his soul all glued in these days. But losing Connor . I've never seen him like this. It's - we're talking, but he seems miles away."
The phone was ringing in the background, and when neither Lorne nor Angel made any attempt to answer it, Buffy picked it up. "Yeah? Oh, you've found him? Where? Okay, that's Uh-huh. Yes, I'm going to tell Angel." She put the receiver down, and saw Angel coming towards her, "They've found Wesley."
"He ask for me?"
"Can't speak," Buffy told him. "Seems Justine cut right through his trachea."
"I want to see him." The vampire want to grab his coat, when Buffy intercepted him.
"No," she shook her head, "You're not going, not the way you are right now."
"Buffy-"
"No," she looked at him, her voice firm, "the only way out here is right through me, and you're not going to hurt me."
Angel stared at her for a long moment, then he gave her one single curt nod before heading for the stairs. A moment later they heard a door open and close, and Buffy turned to Lorne, "Could you show my friends two rooms where they could stay?"
"Sure, sweetheart, I can so that." He put an arm around Tara, leading her towards the stairs, "Hey, I get interesting vibes from you, angel. Did warrior-girl here tell you I was empathetic?"
"N-no," Tara shot the demon a confused glance.
"No?" Lorne seemed surprised, "I can't believe she doesn't talk about me constantly. I'm such a great guy to know."
Shaking his head, Xander leaned into Buffy, "He always like that?"
"The truth, most of the time. But he's a good friend. To all of us." Buffy smiled fondly at Lorne's back, "He was the one who saw that Angel's soul was all glued in. For a big part we owe him for," she pointed at her stomach, "this."
Xander became serious, "How will Angel feel about the baby, now that his son is gone?"
"I don't know," the Slayer said honestly, "But I'll be there for him. I think it's the only thing I can do. I miss Connor, too. Maybe soon he'll realise that he isn't the only one grieving."
"He will," Xander patted her shoulder, "Hey, we can talk later, okay. I'm going to go with Tara and Lorne, let him show me the room and all."
"Yeah," Buffy smiled at him fondly. "And thanks."
He smiled back, "That's what friends are for."
*****
"It's hopeless," Gunn exclaimed, trying to make some sense of the filing. "Half these files I can't even read the client's names! What's this? Fizzana? Fizz - Fizzcar? What does this say to you?" He held up the file for Fred, who tilted her head.
"Could be Frysylka. - Oh, right. They were that couple that called last week with the squatter in their layer. Wesley was supposed to - It was supposed to be taken care off." Quickly she cast her eyes back to the file she was holding.
"Well, I guess he was too busy stealing the baby," Gunn said, anger apparent in his voice.
Fred's head came up again, "Don't," she said half pleading. "Okay?"
"Maybe it's his way of dealing with anger," Tara suggested, giving the other woman a gentle smile. "I'm usually not a violent person, but right now I feel a little angry as well. I I mean," she looked helplessly at Xander, not quite certain how to go on.
"What my friend here wants to say," Xander put an arm around Tara, "is that our ex-watcher guy really messed things up around here."
"Can we," Fred was clearly distressed now, "please *not* talk about this? I can't stand it anymore. Wes made a mistake, but he did it with the best intentions."
"Maybe," Xander agreed, "The problem is, we can't make this right. The baby is gone. You can ask the others, Angel was never particularly a friend of mine, but I'm with him here. If that kid was mine -," he shook his head, "Not sure what I would do."
"At least Buffy kept him away from the hospital," Tara said, "There is no telling what he might do if...." she trailed off, giving the others a pointed look.
At that same moment the doors of the hotel opened, and they turned around only to see Cordy and Groo walking in, both wearing big grins, Groo also carrying several bags. "We're back," Cordy announced, "And we're bearing gifts!" She stopped dead in tracks, Groo almost bumping into her, when she saw the distress on the faces, faces she hadn't even expected to see. "Xander? Tara? What happened?"
"Oh, Cordy," Fred rushed to the other woman, throwing her arms around her, "It's so awful."
Not understanding a word, Cordy glanced at the others, her eyes asking for explanations.
"Connor is gone," Gunn supplied.
"Gone?" The word almost stuck in Cordelia's throat, and she disentangled herself from Fred, "What do you mean, gone?" her voice was rising, turning from confused, to almost hysterical, "Holtz?" she asked finally, dreading the answer.
"We wish it was that simple," Tara told her, feeling sad and helpless. She was a witch for goodness sake and she couldn't do anything. It was more than just depressing.
"Princess, I can feel your distress. Can I do anything to relieve it?" Groo deposed of his bags beside the counter, and came to stand beside Cordelia. Then he bowed slightly, "May I introduce myself, I'm Groosalaug . I am the princess' champion."
"You are WHAT?" Xander asked, not able to believe his eyes and ears. "You referring to Cordy here?"
"The princess, yes," Groo replied gravely.
With a little wave of her hand, Cordy interrupted them, "Not now, guys. Again, Gunn, what about Connor?"
"Wesley took him, gave him to Holtz, and now he and Connor are gone to," Gunn shrugged, "some weird dimension that nobody knows where to go to or how to get there."
"No." Cordelia shook her head, stepping back from them, "You're making this up. Connor can't be gone." Her eyes started to tear, a sob rose in her throat, "I mean . I b-bought p-p-p-presents for him. A b-bear, a-and a little t-train. No," she shook her head again, her eyes spilling over by now. "How . how could Wesley do that?"
"He found this prophecy," Fred told her, "And it said, the father is going to kill the son. He thought Angel was gonna kill Connor, so he took him. Only later we found out - I mean after Connor was gone - that the whole prophecy was fake, nothing was real. This demon-guy made it up, because Connor was meant to kill him."
Wiping her eyes, Cordy asked, "Where is Angel?"
"Upstairs with - Buffy, but I think you should-," leave them alone, Xander wanted to answer, but the former cheerleader was already gone.
*
Cordy opened the door to Angel's old apartment slowly, not sure what she would find there, dreading it more than she had dreaded anything before. She was shocked to find it mostly destroyed, burnt, the remains of Connor's crib still standing, a reminder of better days and times. Again a sob rose in her throat, but she suppressed it, not wanting to burden Angel with her pain. He had enough of his own.
She found him on the bed. He was very still, his face buried in Buffy's chest, who was lying so close you could hardly say where the one ended and the other began, even though the Slayer's rounded stomach presented a slight problem, but somehow they had managed to get around it. Buffy's arms were wrapped tightly around Angel's shoulders, while his lay loosely around her expanding waist.
At the picture before her, Cordy wanted to retreat, but before she got the chance, Buffy raised her head, and the women's eyes met for a short moment. There was so much sadness in the blonde's eyes, so much pain, Cordy wanted to scream. If Buffy felt that way, she could only guess what Angel was going through right now. The Slayer nodded slightly at her, before turning back to her grieving lover, whispering something to him. He didn't move, didn't raise his head from Buffy's chest, but Cordy was sure he knew now she was there.
Maybe, she thought, slowly backing away from the bed, and leaving the apartment, for now it was enough.
END
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