Title: Max’s Song 1/1
Author: Kayarra Ali
E-mail: SweetChica228@aol.com
Summary: Max gives up on life
Disclaimer: Unless Roswell is a show where Max, Kyle, Alex, and Michael are my love slaves, Liz, Maria, and Isabel are my minions and Tess is our little dog Toto, then no, I don’t own Roswell.
The song is “Adams Song” by Blink 182
* * * * *
I never thought I’d die alone
I laughed the loudest who’d have known
I traced the cord back to the wall
No wonder it was never plugged in at all
I took my time I hurried up
The choice was mine I didn’t think enough
I’m to depressed to go on
You’ll be sorry when I’m gone
* * * * *
I never thought I would see my self in this position. Me, Max Evans, about to make the decision between life and death. I open the seven pill bottles.
I’m making my choice and I choose death.
There’s really nothing left me to loose. Everything else I’ve given up on.
Love, happiness, and hope.
The only thing left is an illusion of something that was once there.
But you can’t live off of an illusion.
Illusions lie.
I know everybody’s going to be upset. And I’m sorry for that. But soon, maybe in a year, they’ll forget and live happily ever after. Hopefully, they will escape the alien abyss. In my battle I didn’t escape. I lost.
My stomach hurts now.
I’ve already taken six bottles and the black cloth of death is getting closer. So, I guess my apologies are due.
I’m sorry mom and dad, for never letting you in. For not trusting the love that parents have for their child. But you’ll know the truth soon enough. Isabel will tell you.
I’m sorry Isabel, for not being the brother that you wanted. For bossing you around. For not being sure if betrayal would come twice.
I’m sorry Michael, for fighting with you. For hating my best friend. I don’t think I really hated you. I was just upset that you had a destiny that didn’t have to be fulfilled.
I’m sorry Maria, Alex, Tess, and even you Kyle. You guys were my friends, and I’m sorry for not trusting our friendship.
And you Liz, I’m sorry the most to you. I’m sorry that I hurt you, I’m sorry for giving up on you so easily, and most of all I’m sorry for not being human.
My thoughts are shaken as my room door burst open. I can barely see who it is, but in comes Isabel…and you Liz.
You both come by my side, as if somehow you’re presence would help. In the distance I can hear Isabel calling out to mom.
First my sight, then my hearing. My senses are leaving one by one.
Liz taps my face. “Come on Max, wake up, you have to stay up! Please Max!”
I can barely feel her hand on my arm, shaking me to stay awake.
“I’m sorry Liz.”
I feel something warm on my cheeks.
Tears.
Hers, or mines, I have no idea.
I can feel myself leaving, I only see darkness now, and I have a few minutes left at most.
“No, Max! Please don’t die…I never slept with Kyle! Please wake up Max, I love you!”
I’m fighting now.
I’m fighting to stay awake for her. I don’t want to die anymore. I’m trying to open my eyes. I’m trying to sit up. I try to make my mouth move. I no longer want to go towards the light. I want to live with Liz forever, happily ever after.
Just give me this please.
I’m begging the Lord, the Heavens, who ever is in charge, just give me a happy life with Liz.
I beg and I plead.
But it’s to late.
I’m already gone.
* * * * *
I never conquered, rarely came
16 just held such better days
Days when I still felt alive
We couldn’t wait to get outside
The world was wide, too late to try
The tour was over we’d survived
I couldn’t wait till I got home
To pass the time in my room alone
FACT: Most people who attempt suicide often want to live after the attempt is made. Unfortunately, a lot of the attempts are successful.
