Steve sat straight up in bed when the ear splitting scream shattered the quiet of the bedroom. He clicked on the bedside light quickly and turned to his wife who was sitting up with her legs pulled tightly to her chest, wide-eyed and shaking. The only sound was that of her rapid intake of air. The terrified look on her face shook Steve to the core. He spoke softly unsure if she was still in the grips of the nightmare.

“Kayce?” He wanted to grab her and hold her but held back seeing the glazed look in her eyes. “Kayce?” He asked again in a louder tone. He saw her blink hard and slowly looked about the room until her big blue eyes fell upon his concerned face, recognition coming slowly. “Are you okay Kayce?” She remained silent trying to sort out the quickly blurring images in her head. “Kayce please say something.”

“I’m okay.” She whispered after letting out a shuddering breath. “Sorry I woke you.”

He gave her a weak smile, “Its okay.” He assured her as he placed a loving hand on her trembling back. She flinched slightly and stepped gracefully from the bed. Steve watched as she slipped on her robe over her white satin nightgown. “Where are you going?”

“I just need a glass of water. I’ll be back.” She swiftly walked out of the room before he could voice his offer to get it for her.

Steve stared at the ceiling with his arms behind his head. Kayce had been adjusting well to her kidnapping ordeal or so he and Rudy thought but this was the third nightmare in just as many nights and Steve suspected their origin. Just the thought of what the deranged man’s actions were doing to his wife made him angry. He wanted to rip him limb from limb. He silently watched her from the bed, catching glimpses of her through the hallway as she walked around the kitchen on the other end of the house. He heard the glass clink as she removed it from the cabinet then the water running from the facet.

Kayce took a deep breath and stood at the sink looking out the window at the blackness of the night. Her body was slowly quieting. The nightmares began three nights ago and they were intense and detailed. All three dreams held the common element of leaving her feeling totally helpless and extremely vulnerable. Other details, although clear in her sleeping state became unavailable as soon as she awoke. Six weeks had passed since her kidnapping and her psychologist mind wondered if they were memories coming to the surface from the experience she had been unable to recall due to the drug that was used on her. She thought of what her ex-husband was capable of and wondered what really occurred during that 16-hour period.

She returned to her worried husband and slid into bed next to him. He curled his strong arm around her. “I’m okay Steve. Go back to sleep.” She felt a kiss on her forehead and closed her eyes. With her head resting on his bare chest she soon felt it rise and fall in a regular rhythm. She reopened her eyes afraid to sleep, afraid of what waited for her in the darkness. She stayed next to him, feeling safe and secure, for three hours until the alarm clock buzzed.

While the pair showered and dressed for the day Steve noticed she was a bundle of nervous energy. As he embraced her for a tender kiss goodbye he gazed into her tired eyes and asked her to consider seeing Rudy. She smiled slightly and agreed to think on it.

Steve, in his role as a NASA consultant, was physically present at the four-hour project meeting but his mind remained on his wife the whole time. He felt helpless and angry. He wondered what she was doing while he was stuck in the high level conference which fortunately did not require much active participation from him.

Kayce entered the doctor’s office after a quiet knock and found Rudy standing with his back to the door staring out his window, a coffee mug in his hand. He had watched Kayce park her vehicle and walk across the lot not knowing it was him she was coming to see. When he turned to see who entered his office he was surprised at not only who it was but also at the exhaustion that seemed to enveloped her whole body.

He walked to her asking if she was okay. She smiled and remained silent afraid in her weariness she would breakdown in tears. He gestured to a chair with a furled brow and she slid into it.

“Would you like some coffee?”

“No thanks Rudy. I think my nerves are frayed enough.” The doctor took a seat behind his desk to face the strong young woman he had come to admire.

“What’s going on?”

She took a few deep breaths before explaining the reason for the unexpected visit. “Rudy I have been having some really intense nightmares for the past three nights.” She looked at him and he nodded for her to continue. “They are very detailed but as soon as I wake up the images disappear. I’m wondering if they may be memories from my kidnapping trying to come to the surface.”

“Can you tell me anything else about them?” He asked knowing the time had come where she would have to deal with the traumatic experience. For the past weeks she was adjusting too well to such a horrible event.

“Not really. I remember David’s voice and I know I always wake up screaming. The dreams leave me feeling vulnerable and terrified.” She gave Rudy a small smile and a shrug. “I think it’s harder on Steve than me. I’m worried that if he loses anymore sleep and he’s sent on an assignment he might get hurt.”

Rudy nodded his understanding and spoke slowly, “I think this is more you’re area than mine doctor.” He gave her a friendly smile but she didn’t return it, “What are your thoughts?”

She was instantly on her feet and walking the carpet, her arms tightly folded across her stomach. She just couldn’t get the sick feeling to leave her stomach. She did her best to emotionally detach herself from what she had to say. “Rudy, first off Steve cannot know anything about what we discuss here okay?” Rudy nodded at her request for confidentiality and she trusted him. “I’ve been thinking of what David was and is capable of doing. He was a spoiled only child of a very wealthy family who grew into a man who expects to get whatever he wants without consequences. Now I think he has turned into an uncontrolled narcissist and a sociopath. I don’t think there is a limit to what he would do to get what he wanted. Some of the things that I hear him saying in my dream are words like ‘I love you’… ‘my wife’…. and ‘baby’. He even replaced my engagement and wedding ring with the wedding ring he had given to me years ago. The one I had left it on a dresser when I left him. ”

Rudy looked at her confused as he stood and took a few steps in her direction, “What are you trying to say Kayce?”

She stopped moving and stood with her back partially towards him and choked out her thoughts for the first time out loud, “I think he raped me while I was drugged.” Suddenly the tears poured from her eyes and her body shook. Rudy was immediately at her side with a comforting arm around her. He didn’t know what to say while his heart bled for her. She then shocked him even more with her next thought.

“That’s not the worst part Rudy.” She warned with her voice cracking with emotion. She locked eyes with him and he could see the fear swirling deep in her soul. “I think I’m pregnant.” He felt the feeling of dread move through him. He pulled the distraught woman close for several minutes until the sobs abated.

The physician took a deep breath and said, “Kayce I think we need to take this one step at a time. First let’s do a blood test and confirm your suspicion. Then we can move on from there okay?” He pulled back and she nodded while wiping her tears away with a tissue.

She remained stoic and silent lying on the examination table while Rudy went about getting a blood sample. She only spoke when she was asked questions pertaining to late menstrual cycles and other obvious symptoms of pregnancy. Her exhaustion was evident and the doctor suggested she try and get some rest while he performed the test personally.

Kayce’s puffy red eyes slowly closed and she exhaled slowly feeling she made the right decision to trust Rudy. Soon she dozed off feeling a little lighter now that she had shared her burden with someone. She didn’t know how long she had been sleeping but was startled by a presence next to her. She jolted awake and a familiar hand on her shoulder calmed her. “Kayce take it easy.” Steve wasn’t sure of the reason for her shocked expression. “Steve what are you doing here?” She swung her legs off the table trying her best to sound casual and hide her nervousness.

He looked at her shyly, “I guess I have to confess. I came to talk to Rudy in case you didn’t.”

“Oh.” She replied glancing over her husband’s shoulder and seeing Rudy enter the lab. “Well as you can see I’m in good hands.” She assured him with a forced smile.

“Hi Rudy. Everything okay?” Steve asked lightly.

Rudy swallowed hard. “So far everything is fine. I understand she is having trouble sleeping and hopefully I can help with that.” Steve’s gaze went to Kayce as she tiredly got to her feet. Steve wrapped her in a warm embrace before explaining he had to return to his afternoon meeting. She squeezed him tight afraid of what his reaction would be if her suspicions were confirmed. He kissed her sweetly before saying his goodbye to Rudy and exiting with a final request, “Take good care of her Rudy, she’s the only wife I’ve got!” He winked and was out the door.

The pair waited several seconds before starting their conversation. Rudy was silently grateful Steve was never given bionic hearing. Kayce couldn’t stomach the tension any longer and quietly asked in an urgent tone of voice, “Well Rudy?”

“The test was positive.” He answered quietly and waited for her reaction.

“Oh God.” Was all she choked out while staring at the floor. She teetered and Rudy assisted her to a sitting position, her face lacking all color.

The doctor began toward the next step, “Kayce is there any chance this could be Steve’s baby?” She thought for a while.

“I guess that all depends on how far along I am.” She looked at him with questioning eyes.

“About six weeks.” He watched her stand and pace as her mind retraced her memories and the occurrences of her marital activities. “Kayce?” He stated when she continued to remain silent.

She looked up at his kind brown eyes as tears flowed freely down her cheeks. She didn’t know if the answer she held was good or bad. “Yes, it could be Steve’s baby.”

Rudy continued to question her, “What are the chances you were already pregnant when David kidnapped you?”

Kayce stood lost in her thoughts. “I don’t know Rudy. If it is Steve’s child it was conceived the night before I was kidnapped.” She went on, her voice wavering, “And then again it could be David’s. Oh God Rudy, what am I going to do?” She buried her face in her hands and felt the physician arms encircle her.

“I’m not sure Kayce. All I know is, I’ll be here to help you but you need to decide how you are going to tell Steve.”

Kayce stepped back from her friend as if she was slapped. “Are you crazy? Steve will kill him. He can’t know anything about this Rudy! Do you understand?”

“Okay, okay calm down. Let’s consider how we can find out if David could actually be the father. What if you or I went to the prison and asked him?”

“I wouldn’t trust anything he said Rudy. He’s not mentally stable you know that.”

The distraught young woman began pacing barely keeping up with rapid fire questions in her head. ‘What if it was David’s baby, should she continue the pregnancy? How could she confirm it? Medical science was not advanced enough to identify or rule out paternity with any real accuracy yet. What if she thought it was David’s baby and terminated it and it was really Steve’s child? What if it was Steve’s child and the drug and anesthesia David gave her caused permanent damage to the developing fetus.’

She knew as well as Rudy that if there were any way to confirm or deny the assault it would have to be done quickly. Her pregnancy could not be kept a secret much longer. Rudy could see the strain the mental onslaught was causing. “Kayce sit down.”

“What?” She asked not hearing his request.

“Sit down before you fall down.” She took her previous seat and remained silent. Rudy waited patiently as she mentally worked the problem over the next several minutes.

“Hypnosis.” Was all she said as she looked up and locked eyes with him.

“Are you sure?” Rudy asked in disbelief fully aware that going under hypnosis would require living through the nightmare again. She nodded, “I know from experience with my patients. The only way to stop the nightmares is to deal with the buried memories and it’s the only way to get some answers and quickly. Time is not exactly on my side Rudy.” He noticed her voice had gotten stronger now that she was taking some control and trying to find a solution to the overwhelming problem. She sighed seeing the deep concern lying stagnant on his face, “Rudy bringing those memories to the surface is not going to be the most difficult part. Being around Steve and hiding this from him is going to be the most difficult.”

Rudy inquired, “What if Oscar wants to send you out on a dangerous assignment?”

“I guess I’ll just have to be very careful.” She said with a shrug determined no one but Rudy would know of her situation for the time being.

Three days after seeing Rudy Steve was taking Kayce to her favorite French restaurant to celebrate her birthday. He noticed his wife had been very quiet as the two got ready to go.

Over dinner Steve asked in a subdued tone of voice, “Kayce what’s been going on with you?” He tried to read her face but she kept her gaze on her salad as her chest tightened.

“Nothing. Why?” She replied.

“Well you seem preoccupied and unusually quiet the past several days.” He was beginning to wonder why she wouldn’t look at him when she finally brought her blue eyes to meet his, “I’ve just been, I don’t know, reflective I guess.”

“I see and why is that?”

She took a deep breath and realized she had been given a chance to explain her new role at the OSI, “Well I get bored when I’m between assignments. You at least can contribute to the NASA projects. I don’t feel very useful so I asked Oscar to assign me back to his flight crew.” She wondered if he bought the explanation. In fact she requested return to the flight crew to limit her exposure to Steve, at least for now. It was getting extremely difficult for her to be near him knowing what she knew. She became worried when he became very sullen. “What’s the matter?” She asked cautiously.

“You do realize this means we won’t be seeing as much of each other.” She nodded and shrugged her apology. Her mind was still trying to figure out how she was going to keep her appointment with Rudy and the hypnotist a secret from her husband. She was off the hook with his next statement.

“Oscar’s sending me to Japan.” He said simply. She felt relief flood her body.

“When?”

“I leave in two days.”

“How long will you be gone?”

He shrugged, “I’m not sure, a week, maybe ten days.”

It suddenly concerned Kayce that Steve was going to be in harm’s way. What if something happened to him and he never knew he was going to be a father? The guilt wrapped around her heart and tightened. “Is it dangerous?”

Steve just nodded and stared at his wife. “That’s why I needed to make sure we were okay before I leave.”

She smiled at his handsome face. “Of course we’re okay.” She reached across the table to hold his hand. Steve still wasn’t completely buying it, “Are you sure?” She nodded with a smile and squeezed his hand.

“Well then, Mrs. Austin, I guess we should get back to your birthday celebration.” He reached into his suit jacket and withdrew a long black box with a red satin ribbon. Kayce smiled with excitement, taking the gift and slowly un-wrapping it. Steve was just as excited as she opened the hinged rectangular case. She fought back tears as she pulled the delicate gold and diamond bracelet from the box.

Steve spoke up and Kayce was shocked at his observation skills. “I saw it on your wrist the first time I met you. I know you always wore it so it must have been special to you. I also know it was lost when your plane crashed so I thought I’d replace it. Do you like it?”

She was successful in not allowing the water droplets to ruin her makeup as she answered, “I did miss having it on my arm. How did you find the exact bracelet?”

“Oh I have my ways.’ He replied. “I always wondered where you got the first one.” He looked at her as she inspected every detail.

“Why?”

“Well it’s not something a woman usually buys for herself.” He gave her a crooked grin when her gaze met his over the opened box. She took a deep breath before explaining her father gave it to her on her 12th birthday. It was her first piece of expensive jewelry and her mother was not sure it was appropriate for such a young girl but allowed her husband to get it for his ‘little princess’.

She had asked her father where diamonds came from and he did his best to explain. He also told her that it took a lot of heat and pressure to create something so strong and beautiful. He said he wanted her to remember that so when life caused her a lot of stress she was to remember that it would make her a stronger person.

Steve watched as her mind traveled back to that happy family life she once had. She finished in a hushed whisper, “He and mother were killed two weeks later. Although I made a promise to them that I would only wear it on special occasions I never took it off since their funeral.”

She stared at the fine piece of jewelry as she slowly returned to the present. Steve smiled as she graciously thanked him for such a thoughtful gift. After he placed it on her wrist she gave him a long, loving kiss.

Steve left for Japan on schedule and a casually dressed Kayce was now in Rudy’s office barely keeping her anxiety at bay. Dr. Wells introduced her to Dr. Robert Briggs who would be conducting the session. He was a tall and lean man with black hair and warm brown eyes. Kayce guessed him to be in his early forties. Dr. Briggs asked Kayce a few simple questions but was already briefed on her case by Rudy. The young woman was surprised how relaxed she felt around the man with the calm demeanor.

Rudy asked Kayce if she was sure she wanted to go through with this and she nodded confidently as her hand fumbled with the bracelet on her wrist. It had been her anchor through the years and it would be again.

The pretty woman looked at her friend and confidant and asked, “You will be here won’t you?” Rudy, who was not planning on remaining in the room for the session, saw the fear behind her cobalt eyes.

“If you want me here.” Rudy answered in a quiet tone.

She nodded affirmatively but assured him, “I know it will be difficult for you so if it gets to be too much I will understand if you left but please stay until I’m under.”

“Okay.” He said squeezing her hand and wishing he had her strength at facing this situation.

It only took a few minutes for Kayce to get settled on the couch, her hand still in physical contact with the bracelet. Her father’s words buzzed in her head until Dr. Briggs’ voice interrupted. “Let’s begin.” He said quietly and Kayce exhaled slowly while Rudy took a deep breath and held it.

As the session slowly progressed Dr. Briggs continued to reassure the woman that she was safe and only an observer of the scene before her. Rudy sat stiffly on the edge of his seat, elbows on his thighs, wringing his hands together. His unfocused eyes gazed at the brown shag carpet but Kayce’s words found his ears.

She repeated specific sentences she was hearing her ex-husband say during her ordeal. As she moved forward into the physical experience Rudy couldn’t take anymore. He had seen and heard a lot in his career as a doctor but he wasn’t able to stomach this situation that affected someone he cared so much for. He stood and quietly left the room with his anger barely in check. In the hallway it took several deep breaths before he could regain control of his emotions. There was no doubt in his mind what Steve would do when he found out what David Ashbury had done to Kayce. There would be no way to control him. After Rudy’s anger settled he realized the young woman needed him and he wasn’t about to abandon her. With one last deep breath to gather his courage he silently re-entered the dimly lit office to re-take his seat.

After getting settled Rudy was relieved when he heard Dr. Briggs already counting backwards, slowly bringing Kayce back to awareness. Both doctors were surprised at Kayce’s emotional control after what she just experienced. The memories that were once hidden were now available to her. She didn’t say much except to assure Rudy she would return after she got some air.

After the door closed Dr. Briggs filled Rudy in on what he missed. “Well it’s confirmed. David Ashbury did sexually assault her.”

Knowing there were different degrees of assault Dr. Wells inquired indirectly, “So he could be the father of the baby?” Dr. Briggs nodded affirmatively and Rudy let out a strangled sigh as he closed his eyes.

“Rudy keep a close eye on her. I understand she is keeping this experience from her husband right now. I don’t agree with it but I understand. She’ll need to work through all this now that the memories are available.”

“Don’t worry I will. Thanks for your help Robert.”

“You’re welcome Rudy. Do you want a written report for her file?”

Taking the cassette tape from the machine he replied, “No I’d like to keep this off paper if you don’t mind. I’ll hang on to this tape in case it’s needed at a trial further down the road.”

The two doctors shook hands at Dr. Briggs words, “I understand.” As soon as his colleague left Rudy locked the tape in his safe. He poured himself some coffee and slumped comfortably at his desk, his mind numbed by the circumstances. His first priority was to assist Kayce any way he could. He knew exactly what was going through her mind at this moment, whether or not to terminate the pregnancy. He felt he knew her almost as well as he knew Steve but this situation was well beyond anything he had expected to see her through. The doctor had no idea what her decision would be, there was no right answer. He slowly swiveled his chair around at the sound of his office door being closed. He watched silently as the young woman walked across the room.

She took a deep breath and stated firmly, “I’m keeping it.”

Over the next 2 months Rudy kept a close eye on Kayce. They had regular psychological session to work through her life altering experience. He was relieved that she could control her rage better than her husband. It meant there was less office furniture that needed to be replaced after each session. Kayce felt with her bionic strength the events should have never occurred and therefore she was to blame. The doctor found it difficult to convince her otherwise.

Her pregnancy was proceeding as expected. It helped her situation that she was not the type of woman who gained excessive weight during her pregnancy. Even at 3 months it was barely noticeable, especially with the clothes she wore. She still couldn’t come up with a way to tell Steve but knew it had to be soon. She feared it would end her marriage to the one man she adored. The stress of the situation was slowly wearing her down.

Steve was in and out of the country on several assignments. When he was home he was usually sleeping through the jet lag from traveling through so many time zones. Kayce kept busy with her cross-country flights. Oscar enjoyed seeing more of her and was sorry to have to end her piloting duties. Her special skills were needed abroad to infiltrate a spy ring attempting to get a stolen list of US covert agents. He wanted to send Steve but he was already on an equally urgent mission and this particular mission required a woman’s touch.

Rudy heard of the assignment when Oscar asked the doctor if he could place a tracking device in Kayce’s bionics in order to follow her movements once she was embedded in the enemy’s network. Dr. Wells told his boss it was possible however he wouldn’t do it without Kayce’s permission.

The young female operative arrived at the lab and was willing to allow the device to be placed in her arm. Rudy was relieved but was still concerned about the pregnant woman being sent into such a dangerous situation, two male agents had already been killed.

He pleaded with her to let him tell Oscar of her medical condition but she was adamant that Rudy, the hypnotist and her obstetrician would be the only ones to know of her condition right now.

Knowing she could be as stubborn as her husband Rudy dropped the subject and wished her luck. Before she left his lab he urged her to tell Steve about the situation as soon as she returned. She just smiled and nodded in agreement.

Steve returned from his assignment in Cuba and was surprised to hear Kayce was sent on such a high-risk mission. He wished he could have gone after her but Oscar denied his request. During her two-week absence Steve didn’t get much sleep and was constantly checking with Oscar for updates on her situation.

Dr. Wells knew Kayce would be brought back to California before being flown to Washington for her debriefing. He made it a point to head back to D.C. on the same flight. He too had not gotten any sleep in her absence.

Now he sat in the Air Force base lounge waiting for her arrival. Oscar approached with his hands casually set in his trouser pockets and took a position at the large window. “Kayce did a great job on this assignment. I’m glad you were able to place that tracking device in her arm. I thought for sure we had lost her there for awhile.”

Rudy just nodded remembering how stressful those 24 hours had been. He stood and ambled over to his friend. The two admired a sleek T-38 jet making a swift and smooth landing on the runway in front of them. “That would be Steve I bet.” Oscar smiled at the doctor who asked, “You mean Steve flew all the way here just to fly back with her?”

“Of course, I told him it wasn’t necessary but you know once he puts his mind to something...”

Rudy let out a sigh knowing how much harder it would be to talk to Kayce alone with Steve close by.

The three men met the exhausted young woman on the tarmac as she deplaned. Steve swept her into his arms placing a warm kiss on her lips. He had missed her terribly. When he finally placed her back on the ground he commented, “Well you obviously didn’t sleep much but by the looks of it you definitely ate well.” His eyes fell on her small belly.

She felt her cheeks get warm as the fear and guilt grew stronger. She was rescued by the doctor, “Kayce it’s good to see you again,” Rudy greeted loudly as he hugged her tight. She replied in his ear, “Thanks Rudy.”

Oscar gestured towards OSI-1, “Well how about we head home.”

Between the long debriefing and Kayce’s desire to return home for a good night’s sleep Rudy was forced to postpone his meeting with her. She assured him she was fine and promised to see him in a day or so to have the tracking device removed from her arm.

When the couple arrived home she was shocked when Steve gave her a phone message from a Dr. Coughlin. The young woman’s fearful expression was barely concealed at the mention of her obstetrician’s name. She was relieved when Steve casually finished, “I don’t know what he wanted but he said he needs to see you soon.” Steve eyed his wife from his sitting position on the side of the bed. Kayce was in the bathroom brushing her teeth trying to think of a way around the situation.

“So who is he?” Steve asked as he began undressing for bed.

Kayce replied as she turned out the bathroom light, “He’s a doctor I met recently.”

“What kind of doctor?”

“A psychiatrist.” She answered walking to the bed feeling her guilt grow exponentially.

“You’re seeing a psychiatrist?” He asked surprised.

“Not personally silly.”

“I thought you were out of the psychology business.” Steve commented as he pulled down the bedspread to slide under the covers.

Kayce stood, already dressed for bed, on the opposite side. Before she answered she casually sat down on the bed with her back to her husband. Still having a strong need to protect her husband from the crushing news she hoped this would be the only time she would lie to him during their marriage, “I am but a former colleague of mine told him to consult with me regarding a case he has. I told him I would be happy to help. That’s all.” With her back still towards him she closed her eyes tight hoping her voice didn’t betray her. She made a mental note to make sure Dr. Coughlin didn’t make any more calls to her house.

Steve didn’t hear the deception and relaxed under the blankets before turning off the lights as Kayce snuggled close.

Kayce turned the key in her car’s ignition and let out a heavy sigh, her pre-natal checkup showed that she and the baby were in good health. Putting the car in gear she smiled hoping Steve would be present for subsequent obstetrician appointments. She knew he would enjoy being involved. Her smile quickly disappeared. Was she just fooling herself? She made the decision this morning as she dressed that tonight, after a quiet dinner, she would explain the whole situation to her husband. She saw how well he interacted with children and knew he wanted to be a father someday. Was it just wishful thinking on her part that he would welcome this baby unconditionally even though its paternity was in question? Forcing herself to think positive she pulled into traffic. A swift glance at her wristwatch told her she had three hours before her appointment with Rudy Wells. She pointed her car north and headed home for a quick lunch.

Only a few miles away Dr. David Ashbury III grinned as the steel cell door was unlocked and he was escorted to the desk. He casually greeted his family’s long-time attorney. The grey haired lawyer made it very clear to his client that his wealthy parents wanted him detained for a time in order to teach him a lesson. The over-indulgent parents however could no longer stand to know their child was locked up in such a horrid place and finally sent the money to cover their son’s bail. Once out in the sunshine young man requested his lawyer drop him at a car rental place in order for him to obtain a means of transportation promising to stay far away from Kayce Austin.

...Continued