1. Cigarettes taste better when you're really stressed or upset.
2. Cigarettes taste better at night.
3. Cigarettes taste better in the cold.
4. People (men, in particular) are jerks.
5. Life is easier if you're wearing sweats, warm socks, and slippers.
6. Dogs are God's best creation.
7. Never stay with someone who chooses (or would choose) drugs over you.
8. Coffee tastes better with cigarettes…and vice versa: cigarettes taste better with coffee.
9. Urinating with a tampon in never feels as good or "relief-ful" as normal urination.
10. They should make a Starbucks scented candle, b/c Starbucks coffee just smells (and tastes) better than "regular" coffee.
11. No matter how broke you are, if you can afford a gumball at a gumball machine, you feel like the richest person in the world.
12. If you only shopped for stuff you "need" at Sam's Club, it's not worth the yearly membership fee.
13. Living with your parents after being on your own for six years really sucks…but it's a hell of a lot better than living with an emotionally and socially abusive/oppressive man (or woman, I suppose).
14. No matter how sad, depressed, or angry you are, watching "South Park" (either the movie or selected favorite episodes, such as "Cat Orgy") can always cheer you up. J
15. The quieter you're trying to be, the louder you are.
16. Sex is a really, really, really great thing…with someone else.
17. Sex--no strings--can be really healthy. :)
18. Cigarettes (especially cloves) taste so much better post-orgasm…especially after an orgasm w/ another person. :)
19. Being washed in the shower, by someone else (preferably someone you're sexually interested in), can be very enjoyable. :)
20. Not all men are total pricks. There are some great ones out there.