I was very excited to hear that Wayne was coming to the Orange County Performing Arts Center, as it’s a very convenient location, plus I’ve worked at the theatre before and have always liked the atmosphere there. I was even more excited to find that as a birthday gift, I had a front row seat on the aisle!
The show started off with Bill going through the audience asking for suggestions. Wayne’s two dancers were standing on stage with the big pad of paper writing down all of the audience ideas. Bill first asked for a list of random words (having already attended the show, I knew he would make a rap out of them. The words were pickle, bootylicious, serendipity, airborne, cannibal, and when Bill asked for a big SAT word, the audience responded with “autonomous” (One person said “Saturn,” to which Bill replied, “What SATs are you taking? I want to take those!” As a side note, I may be missing a few of the words. If you attended the show and remember some that I’m missing, as always, please let me know). Bill also asked for a list of song styles (I said opera just to torture Wayne) and film, TV, and theatre styles. I thought it was interesting that he asked for suggestions before Wayne even came out. There was a big video screen hanging from the center of the stage, and before Wayne appeared onstage, a little video clip played, showing a bunch of different segments of Wayne from various shows. When the video stopped, Wayne came out on stage and sang a rap with the first set of words. He seemed to get a kick out of “bootylicious.” I’m always impressed when Wayne can make up a rap on the spot like that, but I was particularly impressed tonight, because I could tell he really knew what the words meant. He practically defined every one of them in the rap. By the looks on the faces of those around me, as well as the dancers, not everyone seemed to know the meanings of a few of the words. Further proof that you need have some intelligence to do quality improv.

Bedtime story: I’m not sure why, but Jonathan wasn’t at the show. It was just Wayne and Bill, and Bill doesn’t really do much improv. They couldn’t do the normal version if film and theatre styles with only one person. Thus, it was altered into “Bedtime Story.” This game featured Wayne telling a bedtime story to his son while adapting to different film/TV/theatre styles. He asked for a character that could serve as a hero in the story. Someone in the audience yelled “Sponge Bob.” Then he asked for someone who could be an unlikely villain. The Ice Cream Man was selected. So the title of the story was “Sponge Bob versus the Ice Cream Man.” It started off with Wayne talking to his baby (for whom Wayne made a high, cute squeaky voice). At one point, Wayne asked the imaginary child what story he would like to hear. The “baby” replied, “The Merchant of Venice!” Wayne’s reaction was hilarious. He decided that he preferred to tell the story of “Sponge Bob versus the Ice Cream Man.” He started off with a sweet, soothing voice, “Once upon a time under the ocean lived Sponge Bob. I’m probably going to get sued for using a brand name in the show”, he told his son the story of Sponge Bob versus the Ice Cream Man in the styles of Kung Fu, porno, sci fi, horror, western, TV evangelist, and Spanish soap opera.

Song Styles: I have to say that out of all of the shows that I’ve seen, the audience volunteers were the most capable at this show. Wayne introduced this game by complaining about current R&B songs. He found that R&B songs, meant to be romantic by using lyrics such as “Girl, girl I’m gonna push it push it pound it pull it....” were not romantic or loving at all. So he decided to sing an R&B love song the way he thought it should be done. He selected a woman named Mary who was a secretary (could the rhyme scheme be any better? Methinks not!). He asked her what she wanted to do with her life besides being a secretary. She said she wanted to be independently wealthy. Wayne made fun of her: “Oh, so you want to go straight to the wealthy part and skip over the whole working part?” She was at the show with her husband, to whom Wayne apologized after the show, celebrating their 3rd anniversary.

SFX: Did I mention that the audience members were particularly capable? For this game, Wayne selected Art from the audience. Yes, only one person. Remember, Jonathan wasn’t there. The scene was that Wayne was getting ready for a date. He asked the audience for three problems that could crop up in such a scenario. They were a broken fly, burning himself on the stove, and that his wife wouldn’t let him. Art was fabulous. This was the best sound effects game I’ve ever seen. As the Duchess of Sound Effects, I command you to take my word for it. *wink* They never got around to the “wife won’t let him” part of the story, but it was great. The best part was when he was trying to make an omelet. He needed to get eggs, so he got the eggs from the chicken that lived next to his refrigerator. He had some great conversations with the chicken. Then he started flipping the eggs in the pan. The scene ended with him flipping the egg and having it land on his face. Excellent, excellent game.

Expert: Wayne played an expert on hair gel, and Bill questioned him. Wayne said at the beginning that was a new game that they were trying out. To be honest, I don’t think they’ll keep it. It wasn’t the greatest game. Most of it was spent with Bill trying to figure out whether Wayne was a man or a woman.

Greatest Hits: Bill selling the CD, Wayne singing.

Nirvana- “It Smells Like Hot Dogs”
Opera- “I’m Black and I Live in Orange County.” Trust me, it’s funny if you know the Orange Curtain. Wayne was shocked at the title. He scanned through the audience asking, “Who wrote that??” One of the best parts was when he sang, “Look, here are my friends” and turned around and found absolutely nobody there.
“The Botox Blues.” This one was great. Wayne performed the entire song with only one expression on his face. One great big frightening smile (wrinkle free, mind you).
Country- “A Girl Named Ed.” Funny song. All I remember was the ending line: “She can bench press 250. That’s just weird”
Macy Gray- “Why Can’t Pancakes Fly?” Based on such a stupid title, I expected a pretty stupid song. I was surprised when it was actually funny.
Elvis- “I Wish I Were Tinkerbell.” Wayne does such a great Elvis impression! I never knew! This was a great number, especially when he started doing the splits and got stuck.
“Lyposuction Lullaby.” This one ended with the lyposuction going out of control and causing him to concave into himself.
Salsa- “There’s a Lizard in My Pants.” I’m sure it comes as no surprise to my readers that this number was absolutely fantastic. Can’t even begin to describe it.
Prince- “Lovely Diaper.” Great job imitating Prince. All too real. *shudders*
Shaggy- “Not Tonight, It’s My Time of the Month.” Whichever audience member suggested this title was pretty cruel; there isn’t a single word in the entire English language that rhymes with “month” (random trivial fact of the day, brought to you by Elyse). This one was accompanied by Bill in the background singing, “Won’t get any” after every line.

Good game, but it went on for way too long. I suppose they had to lengthen out this game with Jonathan's absence.

Wayne ended the show with a tribute to his favourite singers, just like in San Diego. It was almost the same. He brought out two of his dancers for this one. He imitated Stevie Wonder, Sam Cooke (“You Send Me”), Louis Armstrong (“What a Wonderful World”), James Brown (“I Feel Good”), Sammy Davis Jr., and Michael Jackson. There was some new stuff added to the Michael Jackson tribute, for example, he couldn’t control his white gloved hand. It had a mind of it’s own. It was hilarious. He did his song to the tune of “I’ll Be There” about missing his melanin again, but this time the lyrics were different. He sang that every time the sun came out, he wouldn’t be there. I still enjoyed the tribute section, even though some of the surprise element was taken away, having already seen it in San Diego.

After the tribute was over, the crowd went wild. After Wayne had already left the stage, the audience was still on its feet applauding madly. Naturally, Wayne came back out again. He talked a bit, sent out some thank you’s, etc. Then he announced his big news for the night: His wife’s pregnancy. Yep, that’s right, at some point in February, Wayne will be a daddy! Having seen his wife perform in addition to watching Wayne, let me tell you this much: This will be the most talented baby to grace this earth. That is all I have to say. Congrats, Wayne! :)

Also, a special thank you to Julie (Freestyle) for helping me fill in some of the blanks of this report.