Dear Abby
Part Six
By Carolina
super_carolina1@yahoo.com

Disclaimer: The usual, on the rocks. It was really hard to follow that last part, so this one is really long. Any feedback can be sent to super_carolina1@yahoo.com, please be gentle. The birthday poem is by Susan Polis Shutz.

Abby was awaken by the loud noise coming out of her alarm clock. She had the habit of getting up as fast as she could when the alarm went off, that way she could not fall back asleep, it used to scare the hell out of her brothers. She walked into her small bathroom and turned the lights on, making her sensitive eyes close immediately. After she got used to the brightness she stood in front of the mirror and stared at her reflection 'That's right, you're 33 today' She brushed her teeth and while getting dressed she was interrupted by the phone

Abby: Hello?

Carter: Hey Abby, it's me.

Abby: Hi, what's up ('what's up?' she thought)

Carter: Nothing, I'm gonna be there in 15 minutes

Abby: For what?

Carter: I'm picking you up, remember?

Abby: Oh that's right! Sorry, I have no caffeine in my system

Carter: (laugh) Ok, I'll get us a couple of coffees on the way. I'll see you in 15.

Abby: Bye

And she hung up. She suddenly felt a breeze and realized she was still in her underwear. Being the only girl out of 5 kids really makes you grow really self-conscious about covering up your goods. She even felt weird coming out of the shower with a towel around her body when she was married to Chris. She looked outside the window and for the first time noticed what a lovely spring day it was, which made her want to change the long sleeved shirt she had picked first for something a little more sporty. For a really weird reason she felt happier today. The sun was shinning, birds singing, kids playing outside, some days you wake up and you just know it's going to be a good day. She opened the refrigerator in hopes to find at least some orange juice. There was nothing there but emptiness and the remaining of a birthday cake. Her thoughts went immediately back to the events of the night before. How Luka was able to get her grumpy landlord to participate in his little party was beyond her. She focused her eyes on the candle still sitting on the icing. She did not make a wish really, it was more like a resolution. The last year had been so difficult that last night she decided that whatever life was going to send her way, she was going to make the best of it. She was tired of living in sadness. She knew she deserved more.

While waiting for Carter to arrive, she decided to watch a little television. Of course, she hadn't been able to find the remote in the last four months, so she would mostly watch what was on. After punching the TV a couple of times, she finally got an image. 'Panuts!, great'

Tv (Lucy): DOG GERMS, AHHH!...

Abby smiled and when she looked down she found a birthday card on the floor. She picked it up and quickly recognized Luka's handwriting inside, followed by a poem that read:

"Sometimes we are lucky enough to meet a person
who stands out among all the other people as being extremely special.
who knows what we are thinking about,
who is happy for us at all times,
who is always there to talk to us,
who cares about us selflessly,
who is always truthful with us.

Sometimes we are lucky enough to meet someone
who is extremely wonderful.
For me, that person is you my dear friend"

Leave it to Luka to do something like this. Her mind trailed off to the end of the night. 'Was I wrong to kiss him?' It certainly didn't feel wrong. It was just a friendly kiss, that was the intention. She knew he was aware of that. She could feel it. And it probably lasted about 2 second, 2 wonderful seconds. Whatever the real meaning behind the kiss was, they could only remain friends. She was still a student, she even had a rule about dating people at work and both of them still needed closure. Abby knew she was getting closer, but she wasn't sure about Luka. After all this time, he still hadn't been able to share with her what really happened to his family, and she had learned not to push him. But it hurt her so much to see him suffer, to change subjects when he started talking about his wife or kids, to look the other way when a father took his child in his arms for the first time. Nobody seemed to notice these little details, but she did, and somehow she wished she couldn't. She then heard a honk and someone yelling out her name. She peeked her head out the window and there was Carter, showing her a huge cup of coffee.

Carte: Nobody likes cold coffee.

Abby: I'll be right there.

She grabbed her purse and lab coat, looked at the card for a second, and headed out. Carter was so involved with his issues with the radio that he didn't notice when Abby sat next to him.

Carter: Damn, I hate morning radio shows

Abby: Morning Zoos a little too much for you?

Carter: They wouldn't be if they skipped the damn sound effects and prank calls and just played some damn music. (He said as he turned it off and handed her a big cup of coffee, which she grabbed like a lion on a zebra)

Abby: They really should make these in pills, no burning your tongue and no stains on your teeth.

Carter: The way you drink coffee you'd die of an overdose the first day

He was always quick for come backs. Carter. Now, he's a character. When she was thinking about going to med school, all she heard were negative comments 'It's harder when you're older'; 'How are you going to pay for it'; 'You wont have time for anything and you'll be tired the whole time.' Well, it turns out they were all right. It had been a bumpy ride. When she first arrived in the er she didn't know anyone, she felt so out of place that depression got to her easily, and most of the time she was left alone without supervision or even instructions. In those days the only person who really got some time out to help her when she needed a teacher was Carter. He was a great doctor, and a great person. She was so grateful for his attention that she couldn't sleep for days when she told Mark and Kerry what she had seen in the trauma room. She debated for hours whether she should tell someone or not. It had been a long day, and she tried to convince herself that she was just seeing things. But after her eyes met with Carter's through the window separating them, she knew she had to do something about it. She owed him that much. When he accused her of being the one who was doing drugs it was like a dagger to her heart. And when he ignored her while she was trying to apologize and asked her if she was happy now, she really felt like she had done the wrong thing, and even thought about going back to Kerri and telling her that it was all a mistake. She remember asking about his progress almost everyday, of course, no one knew much and when she started to piss Mark off, she decided to wait until he came back. And yet when he did, she was too scared to even talk to him, fortunately with Peter Benton came back the old Carter, and he was the one to approach her and apologize for the way he treated her and even threw in a bonus thank you for not staying quiet. They have been really good friends since then. She didn't realize he was staring at her smiling face. She gave him a questioning look.

Carter: It's 7 am and Abby Lockhart is smiling?! Where did I leave that camera?

Abby: Very funny.

Carter: I'm assuming this has to do something with operation cleanup last night.

Abby: Ok, A) You assumed wrong, ass. And B) If I'm smiling it's because I've decided to smile more. It makes other people smile and therefore it creates a chain reaction of happiness.

Carter: OK. What kind of reaction occurs when you creep people out?

Abby: Seriously though, I need to talk to you about something that happened last night.

Carter: Oh my God, you had sex!

Abby: NO! of course not. What's the matter with you?

Carter: What happened then?

Abby: Well, after we cleaned up, Luka was ready to leave and I was really thankful about what he had done earlier. I really don't know what happened, maybe I had a little too much cake. When he was standing at the door...I...sort of...

Carter: Kissed him?

Abby: Right. But it was just a friendly kiss

Carter: A friendly kiss on the lips?

Abby: They exist.

Carter: Did he kiss you back?

Abby: I don't know

Carter: What do you mean 'I don't know'?

Abby: Well, he sort of leaned in. It was really fast. Besides, I'm sure he took it as a friendly gesture, nothing more.

Carter: So what's the problem?

Abby: Well, what if he didn't?

Carter: That's something you'll have to ask him.

Carter said matter of factly. Abby just sank on the passenger seat and took a big gulp of her coffee. 'This is what my life has come to, ambiguous foreplay.' They rode the rest of the way in silence, each concentrated on their own issues. When they got to the er they were surprised to see that it was empty, just one patient on the board. Kerri was at the admittance desk searching for something on the Internet, while Andrew was teaching the nurses how to talk like Burt Reynolds.

Carter: Morning Dr. Weaver

Kerri: Good morning Carter, Abby

Abby: Hi Dr. Weaver

Carter and Abby kept walking towards the lounge when Abby suddenly turned around after hearing Kerri call out her name.

Abby: Yes?

Kerri: I wanted to talk about your internship. With your graduation being weeks away it might be time to you to decide whether you want to stay on the er or try something else. I recall you mentioning earlier that you might be interested on a pediatric rotation?

Abby: Yes, It's what I know best. We mostly dealt with babies obviously, but I also worked at a pedes department for a long time before being transferred to OB. I'm very familiar and comfortable with it.

Kerri: That's good news. We got a new pediatric resident today. He's looking for students and residents who might be interested in going through a pediatric internship, I recommended you for one. His name is Dr. Matthews, he's going through the department right now. Make sure you introduce yourself when you see him.

Abby: Wow, I will. Thanks Dr. Weaver.

Kerri: You're welcomed, don't let me down.

Abby: I won't.

Abby smiled at Kerri who returned the gesture and walked into the lounge.

Abby: You're not gonna believe what happened.

Carter: What?

Abby: Weaver recommended me for a pediatric internship

Carter: Wow, that's something. Congratulations.

Abby: Thanks. I better go find this new resident.

Carter: We got a new resident?

Abby: Yeah, Dr. Matthews or something. See ya around.

Abby walked outside and bumped into Luka, who was just walking into the lounge.

Luka: Oops. I'm sorry, are you ok?

Abby: Yeah I'm fine. I thought you were off today.

Luka: Kerri called me, Mark's out of town.

Abby: Oh. Listen, can we talk later?

Luka: Sure. Do you wanna meet up for lunch?

Abby: Ok, I'll meet you at Doc Magoos at 12:30

Luka: Is there something wrong?

Abby: No, no. I just need to talk to you about something.

Luka: All right. See ya later

Abby: Yeah

Abby wasn't sure if she should be so straight forward. But she needed to talk about what happened with him, and she knew he wasn't going to take the first step. But that was something to worry about later. Right now she really wanted to find this Matthews guy. The lack of patients gave her an opportunity to do this freely. She walked to the front desk again to make sure no one needed her and to let Andrew know where she was going.

Andrew: Sure. By the way. Some doctor was looking for you. Dr...Matthew

Abby: Mathews?

Andrew: Yeah, that's it. He said he'll be on the cafeteria, in case you wanna go down and meet with him

Abby: Thanks Andrew

Andrew: No prob.

Abby ran toward the elevators and after waiting for a while, decided to take the stairs.

Luka (to Andrew): Who's Dr. Matthews?

Andrew: No clue

Luka: Why did he want to see Abby?

Andrew: I don't know. Maybe they're dating.

Luka just gave Andrew a questioning expression while Andrew turned around. He then turned his attention towards the stairs. 'Abby? Dating? No way, I'm sure she'd tell me. Would she?' His thoughts were interrupted by Chuny's voice.

Chuny: Hey Dr. Kovac. We have a car vs. woman coming in. Just one victim.

Luka: Ok, prepare trauma one. Hey Chuny? Do you know who Dr. Matthews is?

He said as he followed Chuny to the ambulance bay. Abby walked into the cafeteria realizing how hard it would be to find one doctor on a hospital food court. But it was so early that the cafeteria was almost empty, a group of nurses sat on one table and two doctors, one whom she already knew. So she walked over to the other one, who seemed to be concentrated on a newspaper article. She approached quietly wondering if she should wait for him to finish eating his cereal, but he noticed her before she had time to turn away.

Abby: Hi. Dr Matthews?

Dr: Yes?

Abby: I'm Abby Lockhart. The desk clerk said you were looking for me?

Dr: Oh yes. Please call me Phil (he got up from his chair to shake her hand and offer her a seat). Do you want anything to eat?

Abby: No, thanks. I had breakfast already.

Phil: Great. So, I hear you're interested on pediatrics?

Abby: Yes, very much.

Phil: Good. Basically what I'm looking for is people who are determined to make a career out of sick kids, much like yourself. We're recruiting doctors from all over the nation. Lucky for you, this year the program will be held here on Chicago. We're looking at 10 months of training and towards the end, one person will have the privilege to receive a full time job, housing, a very fair salary, the whole deal. The pay back: that person will have to be transferred to Maryland for a year to work closely with us. The good news: that person will be working at Johns Hopkins, which as you may or may not know, is the best medical university in the nation and has the best facilities. So, are you still interested.

Abby: Wow, that sounds really exciting. But, what if the 'chosen one' doesn't want to be transferred to Maryland?

Phil: Well, we're not going to make you do something against your will. If that person declines the offer, then we'll choose another one. But it would be sad to see someone pass such an excellent opportunity.

Abby: Ok. Well, I'm definitely interested.

Phil: Great. We're starting the program in a month. I'm here ahead of time to interview as many candidates as I can, check the facilities out. So, you know Kerri Weaver?

Abby: Yes, she's my boss.

Phil: Great! and here I was worried about it being a personal reference. I'm sure you'll be a valuable addition to our group.

Abby: Well, to tell you the truth, when I first started here I was an awful student. I almost killed about 4 patients and I made a lot of mistakes.

Phil: I trust Kerry Weaver. I'll be working here in the hospital so we'll probably see more of each other, I'll be keeping and eye on you.(he got up from his chair and ate the remaining of his cereal straight from the bowl) I've got a meeting right now, so I've got to get going. It was nice to meet you Abby Lockhart (he said as he shook her hand). I look forward to working with such a talented and beautiful woman.

And he walked away. 'Talented and beautiful woman?' She has never been called that before. But she didn't make a big deal out of it and put it on the back of her mind quickly as she started thinking about that program. It as going to be a hell of a ride. She had heard of that tanning before from some of the doctors up in OB, and they said it was really demanding. But after going through medical school, a divorce and working in OB at the same time and later working in the er for a year and a half, nothing seemed demanding enough. She suddenly remembered that she was on duty and headed upstairs. Half the day went by and she kept thinking about that program. It would be hard to leave Chicago, then again, it really was and excellent opportunity. Anyway, that's if she was the person who would get to go, a very slim chance. 'They'll probably go for a male fresh out of medical school.' She was signing charts at the front desk when her stomach began to growl, she looked up at the clock and for the first time today saw the time: 12:40. "Oh my God, Luka". She dropped the charts on the desk began walking towards the doors "Andrew, tell Dr, Weaver I'm on my break," Andrew just nodded without looking up. Abby walked into Doc Magoos and began searching for Luka, who she saw sitting on a table on the back.

Abby: I'm so sorry I'm late, I got involved in something else

Luka: That's ok (He said as he pulled a chair for her)

Abby: Thank You

Luka: So what did you want to talk about?

Abby: Well...

To be continued...